Chapter 8
Months passed with no hope of a return, now only alive in memories. They keep me warm, like a thick blanket. They embrace me like a loving soul. Bring me happiness like it’s a holiday.
The last three months felt like living in an island Paradise, where people were the decorations and classes seemed more like quests for coconuts. Days flew by in a hectic race. We no longer felt the rush of time. It no longer existed.
Talking away until sunset, hanging out in each other’s rooms and going to cafes became our favorite things to do. Classes in different buildings on campus, tons of homework and Justin’s job turned our lives into a daily challenge.
I’d wake up and think of how many classes I had left until our next date. During class, I’d count down hours to it. Waiting for him after work, I’d mark off minutes left until the end of his shift.
Bell told me once that Justin was my best friend now. I grinned and thought he really wasn’t just a boyfriend, he was my best friend, my go-to guy. We weren’t just two halves of one, finally growing together. He changed me, made me better.
His personality surpassed all my made-up expectations. I still can’t believe how one person could have so much love, care and compassion to give.
Justin grew up in Rayville, too. He was raised by his mom, so he didn’t know what fatherly love was like. In his teenage years, he tried taking odd jobs to help her out, since she had to work two jobs. Even then he kept sending her half his paycheck .
Still in school, he tried many things to earn some money before coming to a realization that he wasn’t half-bad at writing.
At 16, he wrote lyrics for a song and posted it on his blog.
A few weeks later he got a knock on the door, someone offered a hefty sum for the song, enough to take care of his mom’s loans.
The song was a hit. Every radio station played it.
That’s when he knew he wanted to become a writer.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
I smiled, holding the pencil at my lips.
“It’s nothing.”
I was on his bed, reading the same paragraph over and over, trying to focus on the text as thoughts about him distracted me.
Justin was a lot more serious about his studies. He was sitting on the floor at a small rolling table, stroking my leg and studiously writing in his workbook.
“My roommate isn’t coming back tonight. You can stay here if you want.”
I looked up from the book and met his cyan eyes.
“Okay.”
We smiled and returned to our textbooks.
Faint anticipation was stirring me up like a gentle breeze on the sea. We both knew what was coming.
Every time I knew we’re going to hang out in his room, I’d put on my jade green lingerie set. I got it back in Rayville years ago but never actually used it. I’d use half a bottle of body mist, do my hair and makeup.
Last time I dated someone was back in high-school. We’d hold hands and kiss, but we were more like a couple of friends. Adult relationships were still new to me. I had no idea what they were supposed to be like, what I should or shouldn’t do. I tried to trust Justin.
I slammed the book shut.
“I never asked you. And you never offered. ”
“What?” he asked, smiling at me.
“Write a poem about me.”
He chuckled.
“A poem?”
Confused, I kept looking at him.
“Yes,” I said hesitantly.
“Baby, my entire day planner is covered with poems about you.”
My eyes lit up and he immediately knew what I wanted to do next.
“Second shelf from the bottom. It’s the blue one.”
I reached for the planner and pulled it from the shelf.
I bit my lower lip as I held it in my hands, giving him a cheeky smile.
He grinned, shaking his head.
I flipped it open, and Justin jumped to his feet. I tried getting away, but he pulled me by my legs as I kept kicking and crawling up the bed to break free. Justin sat on top of me and snatched the planner out of my hand.
We froze, looking at each other. He tossed the planner aside and kissed me. His lips covered mine and our tongues intertwined. He leaned back, slowly took off his hoodie and dropped it to the floor.
My gaze fell on his chiseled body.
“Like what you see?”
I looked up and met his sultry gaze. I could feel how flushed my face was.
“You do. I see.”
He took my right hand and put it on his chest. I ran my hand down languidly, stopping at his belt.
“Wanna take it off?”
I nodded and slowly undid his belt.
Anticipation and slight excitement made my heart race.
“May I? ”
I gave him a quick nod, and he took off my white shirt, leaving it on the floor.
“Cute. Is that for me?”
My blushing cheeks gave away how awkward and shy I felt.
“You’re too tense, baby. We don’t have to do it, if you don’t want to. We can try another time.”
“No. It’s fine. I want it now.”
His left hand caressed my cheek.
“Do you wanna be on top?”
“Yes.”
I sounded as unsure as I felt.
We changed positions and I could feel some of my tension melt away.
“I like your bra.”
“Stop.”
“What?”
One corner of his lips perked up.
“I’m shy.”
“Baby, you look like you can do anything you want to me, and if you see me crying, that’ll be tears of joy.”
I couldn’t control my awkwardness anymore and pressed my lips to his.
My body jerked when I heard a loud man’s cry coming from the hall.
The scream startled me, speeding my pulse up.
It was filled with pain and suffering. The clatter of boots from a crowd shouting something incoherent followed the scream.
Or was it running away from it? Some kind of chaos broke out outside the door.
Next thing we knew, it all fell dead silent again.
I froze, staring at the door, and then turned to look at Justin. We looked at one another without a word, waiting for what’s coming next.
“It’s Saturday. Maybe someone’s having a party,” Justin said .
The scream made me think. Had I actually heard men screaming before? Never.
What about woman’s cries? I heard those plenty of times.
Justin began unbuttoning my jeans.
“Cute bow. Stand up a bit.”
I got on my knees as my pulse was racing, but not because of him.
He leaned over to kiss my stomach. His lips slowly moved up, leaving behind a trail of kisses.
His hand was stroking my neck as he kissed my shoulder, slowing down and sucking on the skin.
His right hand was about to slide past my bow, when a long and piercing woman’s shriek rang outside.
The cry made my stomach turn, sending a wave of terror through my body.
We heard a thud at the door, as if someone stumbled into or was thrown at it.
There was ruckus in the hall again. Then we heard a frantic, dread-filled voice cry out, “They’re coming! ”
I jumped to my feet and Justin followed me.
Once the screams and the clatter of shoes faded, Justin picked up my shirt and put his hoodie back on.
Pulse was ringing in my ears.
Was the university under attack? Were they terrorists? One of the students? Should we start running? What was going on? What was outside?
“I’ll go check what’s up. Lock the door behind me.”
I grabbed his arm. My heart was beating wildly, all my instincts screaming for us to stay away.
“Don’t go out there.”
He stopped and turned to look at me.
I was shaking already.
He came closer, gave me a tight hug and pressed his lips to my forehead.
“I’m only gonna check what’s going on out there. Maybe it’s some kind of a prank. Don’t worry. ”
He pulled back, took my face in his hands and gave me a quick kiss.
“If it’s unsafe, run. Okay?”
One corner of his lips perked up. His eyes were filled with warmth and affection.
Gently caressing my cheek, he uttered,
“I love you.”
The way he said it, so openly and sincerely, completely disarmed me.
I opened my mouth to say the same, but the words got stuck somewhere deep inside me, finding no release. Fear pinned them down.
He gently took my shaking hand, turning it palm up and leaving his silver ring in it.
“My mom gave me this ring for my eighteenth birthday. About a year ago I found out she didn’t buy it. She got her favorite silver earrings remelted, the ones she got from her own mother.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“I want you to keep it, as a promise that I’ll come back. And that you have nothing to worry about.”
“Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?”
He smiled.
“I’m not. I’m sure it’s gonna be fine.”
“What if it’s not?”
My brain kept playing the screams on repeat in my head, like a tape.
His smile faded and he gave me a determined look.
“Then I’ll come back for you and we’ll get as far away from here as possible.”
I kept nodding my head, trying to convince myself to trust him.
He took my face in his hands again, looking me in the eyes.
“Promise you won’t leave this room and wait for me.”
“I promise. ”
A smile appeared on his lips again.
“Okay.”
He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, his left hand stroking my head.
I pressed myself against his body, hugging him tightly, not wanting to let go.
“I’ll stay here and wait.”
“Don’t worry, baby. We’re gonna be fine.”
He kissed my forehead and left the room.
For several minutes I just stood there like an ice statue, watching the door.
Finally, I reached for the door and locked it.