Chapter 26
Kairo~
I couldn’t even remember the number of hours that I had spent looking for Triana, but when I’d finally had to face that she was gone, I’d gotten in my car, then had driven all the way back home, not giving a fuck about the speed limit, stoplights, or anything else along the way.
The only thing that I’d had the presence of mind to manage had been calling into work, reporting my absence responsibly.
However, since I hadn’t ever missed a day of work before in my life, it hadn’t been an issue.
So, instead of being at work, I was banging on the front door of my parents’ house, not caring that it was only six in the morning. Even if my parents weren’t early birds, I’d still be here because nothing was more important than Triana right now.
As soon as my father opened the door, I ignored his bewildered face, saying, “I need to talk to you. Now.”
“Jesus, is everything okay?” the parent in him automatically asked. “Is Dallas okay? Leyden?”
“They’re fine,” I answered as he stepped aside to let me in.
“What’s going on?” my mother asked as she came from the sitting room, rushing at the sound of me banging on their door.
“I need to talk to Dad,” I told her. “It’s...Dallas and Leyden are fine, though.”
“What about you?” she asked, her eyes knowing.
“I need to talk to Dad,” I repeated. “I...I just need to talk to Dad right now.”
“Okay, sure,” he said, gesturing towards his office off to the side of the house.
I didn’t say anything as he kissed my mother on the side of her head, assuring her that he’d take care of whatever was going on, and that just pissed me off further. He was assuring his wife that everything would be fine while Triana was making her way into Mexico on foot, and it was all my fault.
Once we made it to his office, he shut the door, then walked over to his desk, leaning against it, still dressed in his pajamas, and my mind wondered why he wasn’t dressed for work yet, seeing as how it was a Monday, but then I realized that I didn’t care.
“What’s going on, Kairo?”
“I’m about to tell you something, and I need you to listen until I’m finished telling you everything,” I told him. “Can you do that for me? Can you just listen until I’m done?”
My father gave me a tentative nod as he said, “Okay, son.”
I could feel my hands shaking, but that didn’t stop me from telling my father everything from the moment that I’d heard Triana’s voice the day that I’d gone fishing with Winston and my brothers.
I told him everything about continuing to meet her, calling her, and while I hadn’t gone into detail, I had even told him how we’d slept together.
However, it wasn’t until I got to the part of leaving with her that I could feel my chest tightening with shame and regret, but not because I had betrayed him. I could feel my chest caving in because I was going to have to tell my father how I’d left her out there, all alone.
When I was finally done telling him everything, the look on his face was exactly what I’d been expecting. He looked horrified, disappointed, and worried all at the same time, and if he only knew how all of it was tearing me up inside.
“Kairo...I...Jesus Christ,” he muttered as he ran a hand over his hair, the tight cut impossible to muss. “Christ, son.”
“Look, I don’t need a lecture on everything that I’ve done wrong, because I’m very aware of how I’ve fucked this up, Dad,” I told him. “What I need right now is to find her. I...I need to find her.”
Keeping his voice very deliberate, he said, “Kairo, I can’t do anything to help you find her.”
“Dad-”
He put his hand up to shut me up. “Even if I believed that I could influence anything, the laws of this land dictate that I’d have to call Benicio Cortez and tell him what’s going on, and I can’t do that without opening a really chaotic fucking can of worms, Kairo.”
“I don’t care!” I yelled.
“I do!” he yelled back. “I’m not going to let your hormones and bad judgement destroy over twenty years of peace in this country!”
“My hormones?” I choked out. “You think I did all this because I wanted to get my dick wet? Do you know how many women hit on me and Leyden weekly? Do you know how many women would love to have our last name? Triana is not some random fantasy that I used to get my dick wet, Dad.”
I watched him take a deep breath, calming down as he went into parent-mode.
“Be that as it may, I have no influence in Rancher Hills, Kairo,” he repeated.
“If I start making calls to find a girl that I have no business making calls about, questions are going to be asked, and I won’t be able to answer them without having my son thrown in prison. ”
“I left her in the woods alone, Dad,” I reiterated. “She is out there with nothing. She is a woman out there on her own because of me.”
“You said that she was going to go with or without you, Kairo,” he replied. “So-”
“And had I let her go alone, then she would have done it in her own car with plenty of provisions to get her through whatever she needed to get through. I was the one who...who lied to her and led her out there with nothing. Even if I didn’t love her, what kind of man does that make me, huh?
What kind of man leaves a woman on her own like that? ”
“It was her choice to leave in the middle of the night, son,” he pointed out. “She could have easily ridden back with you and then made other plans to try again. You didn’t leave her out there, she left you.”
“Because I betrayed her,” I snapped. “Quit trying to rewrite the narrative to make me blameless because I’m the only one to blame here.
I’m the one who went back to the creek after the first time we met.
I’m the one who crossed over to kiss her.
She was only there to find a way to get her life back on track, and I’m the one who swooped in and complicated things for her more. This is on me.”
“While I can appreciate you taking responsibility for your choices, it doesn’t change the fact that there’s nothing that I can do, Kairo,” he said, and I hated how calm he sounded.
I felt like I was losing my mind, and he sounded like it was just another day at the office, and I didn’t care how unfair that sounded.
“And while I can also appreciate how you feel about this girl, I’m not going to do anything that can land you in prison, son.
Don’t ask that of me, because I can’t do it. ”
“So, that’s it?” I asked. “I’m on my own?”
“No,” he quickly rushed out. “What you’re going to do is leave it alone. You can’t help that girl if you land yourself in trouble, Kairo. Think about that for a moment. What good are you to her if you end up getting arrested for crossing over into Rancher Hills?”
“You’re serious, aren’t you?” I asked, my lungs having difficulty working. “You’re really expecting me to just...just do nothing.”
“No,” he lied. “I’m asking you to think before you do anything rash. You said that she has a brother and that you know of a best friend, so why don’t you try to reach them on social media and tell them what’s going on. It might upset them, but they’re in a better position to find her than you are.”
“I can’t believe that you’re asking me to just stand back and let someone else handle this,” I said, feeling disappointed that he wasn’t siding with me.
“Kairo, does she even want you looking for her?” he asked pointedly. “By your own account, she feels like you betrayed her, so would she even want you kicking up all this fuss on her account?’
“Kicking up a fuss?” I echoed. “Are you serious? That’s how you see this? As kicking up a fucking fuss?”
That had him straightening to his full height. “Watch how you talk to me, son,” he ordered. “I am your father, and you best remember that I’m not the one who created this mess.”
I knew that tone, and so I also knew that I wasn’t going to get any help from him right now.
He was pissed at me, and while he had every right to be, I wasn’t in the mood to be understanding.
Triana was alone and on foot in a place that she’d never been, and I was the one who had left her there.
Oh, my father could argue all that he wanted about how it’d been her choice to leave, but I shouldn’t have gone to bed like I hadn’t just fucked everything up with my confession.
I could have still given her space while still looking out for her, and I hadn’t, failing her in the worst way.
“No, you’re right,” I said. “This is my mess, and I shouldn’t have come to you to clean it up.”
“Kairo-”
“I’m good, Dad,” I lied. “I’ll handle it.”
“Kairo, I need you to listen to me,” he said, a hint of desperation in his tone. “You cannot go into Rancher Hills. No matter what, you can’t go there or contact Benicio Cortez.”
“I won’t,” I promised. “I’ll reach out to her brother like you suggested, and if God’s in a forgiving mood, they’ll find her unharmed.”
“Kairo-”
I turned to leave, whatever words he wanted to say useless to me. If he wasn’t going to help me, then I needed to find someone who would.