Chapter 34
(Arushi POV)
It’s already 7 PM. Nandito ako ngayon sa waiting shed malapit sa university gate.
Ang lamig ng hangin, halos lumipad ‘yong mga papel na hawak ko kanina.
Nakaupo lang ako, naka-slouch habang pinapanood ‘yong mga dumadaang kotse at motor. Wala pa si Auntie Amber. Nag-message naman siya earlier na medyo late siya ng dating, so I’m just trying to wait patiently.
Tangina, I’m tired. Training with Professor Haneul drained the life out of me—emotionally and physically.
Bakit ba kasi ang hirap niya i-read? Sobrang cold pa rin niya kanina kahit one-on-one kaming nag-training.
Ang intense pa rin ng presence niya, and every time she leans forward or talks close to me, parang nawawala ‘yong balance ko sa mundo.
Habang nagpapakain ako ng inis sa sarili ko, may biglang humintong sasakyan sa harap ko. Hindi agad ako tumingin, pero narinig ko ‘yong pagbukas ng bintana.
I froze.
Pag-angat ko ng tingin, it was Margarette—nakasunglasses pa kahit gabi. She was wearing that same confident smirk na parang walang nangyaring awkwardness between us. Well, technically, maraming nangyari.
Nagdalawang-isip ako. Should I? Dapat hindi. Dapat tanggihan ko. Pero pagod na ako and I’m not in the mood to argue or wait longer. So, tahimik akong tumayo at pumasok sa kotse niya. The second I closed the door, ang weird na atmosphere agad.
Tahimik kami habang nagda-drive siya. Hindi ako makatingin sa kanya. Ang awkward. My heart was pounding, not just because of her presence—but because of everything that happened earlier. And I was hoping she wouldn’t bring it up.
Pero syempre, Margarette being Margarette, she smirked while keeping her eyes on the road. “You didn’t kiss me back… pero hindi mo rin ako tinulak.”
Napakagat ako sa labi. “Margarette…”
Hindi ako sumagot. I turned my head, looking outside the window, avoiding her gaze. But I could still feel her eyes lingering on me.
She parked the car sa gilid ng isang tahimik na kalye. Wala masyadong tao. Dim ang mga streetlights. Ang tahimik ng paligid, parang hinila kami palayo sa mundo.
Pagtingin ko sa kanya, bigla siyang lumapit. I didn’t move. I didn’t even breathe.
Then, before I could speak, her lips brushed against mine—soft, slow, tentative. Hindi ‘yon gaya ng ginawa niya noon. This time, it was careful. Sinusubukan niya kung tatanggapin ko siya.
And this time... I didn’t stop her.
Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba pagod ako, o dahil I needed warmth. But I let it happen. Her lips moved gently, as if testing every part of my emotion. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at dinala sa dibdib niya—napansin ko na nanginginig din siya. Akala ko ako lang.
We stayed like that for a moment—just... connected.
Pero nang mas lalim ang halik niya, and her body slowly moved closer, doon ako muling nagising sa realidad. My body reacted. My little buddy reacted. And when she felt it, she paused.
Margarette looked at me—hindi siya natawa. Hindi siya nang-asar.
Tumango siya. She didn’t push for more. Tumigil siya. And I appreciated that.
I stared at her. Gusto kong maniwala. Pero hindi pa ako ready.
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Pagkatapos ng nangyari kanina kay Margarette, hindi ko pa rin maalis sa isip ko ang lahat.
Habang nagda-drive siya papunta sa bahay namin, tahimik lang kaming dalawa.
Ramdam ko ang tension sa loob ng kotse, pero wala akong lakas ng loob para magsalita.
Ano bang nangyayari sa akin? Bakit parang ang gulo-gulo ng isip ko?
Pagdating namin sa harap ng bahay, huminto siya at tumingin sa akin. "Arushi," malumanay niyang sabi, "message me pag may kailangan ka, okay?"
Tumango lang ako, hindi makatingin nang diretso sa kanya. "Salamat sa paghatid," mahina kong sagot bago bumaba ng kotse. Habang papasok ako sa bahay, narinig ko ang pag-start ng engine niya at ang unti-unting paglayo ng kotse.
Pagpasok ko sa loob, agad kong narinig ang tawanan mula sa sala. Alam ko na kung sino ang mga 'yon. Pagpasok ko, nakita ko sina Raegan, Forest, at ang kambal kong si Citrine na nagkukulitan. Pagkakita nila sa akin, bigla silang tumahimik at nagtinginan.
Nagtawanan sila, at sinundan pa ni Forest, "Wow, Arushi, sino 'yang girl na 'yan ha?"
Naramdaman ko ang pag-init ng mukha ko. Nakakahiya!
Hindi ko sila pinansin at dumiretso na lang sa kwarto ko, agad na nilock ang pinto.
Huminga ako nang malalim at lumapit sa salamin.
Tama sila, may bakas pa nga ng lipstick sa labi ko.
Si Margarette kasi... Napabuntong-hininga ako at kinuha ang tissue para linisin ito.
Habang pinupunasan ko ang labi ko, bumalik sa isip ko ang mga nangyari kanina sa kotse. Bakit ko hinayaan mangyari 'yon? Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko. Alam kong mali, pero bakit parang hinahanap-hanap ko?
Biglang nag-vibrate ang phone ko. Pagtingin ko, may message sa group chat namin.
Raegan: "Uy, Arushi, labas tayo bukas? Treat mo naman kami!"
Forest: "Oo nga! Para makilala na rin namin 'yang mystery girl mo. Haha!"
Napailing ako at napangiti nang bahagya. Kahit na nakakainis sila minsan, alam kong nandiyan sila para sa akin. Nag-reply ako:
Arushi: "NO."
Pagkatapos kong mag-reply, humiga ako sa kama at tumitig sa kisame. Ano ba talaga ang nararamdaman ko? Ang gulo ng isip ko. Kailangan ko ng oras para mag-isip at maintindihan ang lahat.
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It’s already 9 PM and honestly, I don’t feel like going out of my room.
I’ve been curled up sa kama ko, nakatingin lang sa kisame habang yung isip ko Ang gulo.
I didn’t even join Citrine sa dinner, and I think Forest and Raegan left na rin kanina, probably out to some bar or something. Typical.
Pero ako? I feel weird. There’s this heaviness sa dibdib ko na hindi ko ma-explain. I’ve been thinking about so many things lately. Professor Haneul. Margarette. And of course… that faceless girl in my dreams.
Yes, her again.
Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero mas lalo siyang tumitibay sa isip ko. Parang every time na pinipikit ko yung mata ko, I could almost feel her presence. Her touch. The way her lips pressed against my neck. The way she breathes against my skin like she’s claiming me.
Like she owns me.
I pulled my blanket up to my chest. Tapos I hugged my pillow, yung isa sa mga binili ko dati randomly sa bookstore. I closed my eyes slowly, trying to relax.
And then, I was there again.
In that same cabin.
It was dim, warm, and the scent of pine mixed with something floral filled the air. I was lying on the bed — the same bed from my previous dreams. And standing in front of me was… her.
Faceless, still. But everything about her felt familiar.
My breath hitched.
She stepped closer slowly, every movement calculated, sensual, and intense. My heart was racing again. I could feel it thumping hard against my chest, parang gusto niyang kumawala.
She climbed on top of me gently, and I swear I could feel the weight of her, the heat of her body. My hands moved on their own, resting on her waist. Hindi ako makatingin sa mukha niya — not because I was scared, but because there was nothing to see.
Pero nararamdaman ko siya. Yung presence niya, yung emotions na dala niya — all of it.
She leaned down, and her lips brushed against my neck — this time, firmer. Mas aggressive. Mas passionate.
“Arushi…” she whispered, voice raspy and low.
My breath caught. Shit.
She kissed me again, this time sa collarbone ko, while her hips subtly moved. I could feel the pressure, the tension, the hunger. Like she missed me. Like she needed me. Like… she was angry.
"You're mine," she said, her tone possessive and wild.
Her hands caressed my arms as she whispered again, “I own you, Arushi. No one owns you aside from me.”
My whole body shivered.
What does that mean?
Pero wala akong lakas para sumagot. I could feel my skin burning from her touch, like my soul was being pulled towards her. My head spun from the sensation. I wanted to ask her so many things — Who are you? Why do you keep appearing in my dreams? What are you doing to me?
But all I could do was breathe her in, let her move, let her take over the dream.
She kissed me again, deeper now, and even in my sleep, my body reacted. I felt overwhelmed, consumed, and yet, safe.
But suddenly—
I gasped.
I woke up.
My sheets were messy, and I was sweating all over. My breath was heavy, chest heaving like I had just run a marathon. I wiped my forehead, trying to calm myself.
I looked down.
And yes. Just like last time… my little buddy was very much awake. I groaned and covered my face with my hands.
I sat at the edge of the bed, not knowing if I should cry or laugh. That dream… it felt more real than ever. Yung boses niya, yung galaw niya, the emotions — all of it haunted me.
And that line — “I own you.”
Those words echoed in my head over and over.
Bakit parang mas gusto ko pa 'yung presence niya kesa kay Margarette? Bakit siya ang hinahanap-hanap ko kahit hindi ko alam kung sino siya?
I picked up my phone and stared at the screen. 10 PM.
I opened my Notes app and started typing, as if maybe writing down these thoughts would help me process everything.
> “There’s a girl in my dreams. I don’t know her name. I don’t know her face. But she touches me like she knows every part of my soul. And the way she says I’m hers… why do I want to believe her?”
I locked my phone after that and curled back under the blanket, hugging my pillow tight. Hoping that maybe, just maybe… I’d see her again when I close my eyes.
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