Chapter 57
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Noah
Coming back from a call about twenty minutes ago, I noticed Gwen sitting in the rental car across the street in front of the newspaper.
Not able to take my mind off of who she was waiting on, and what might be going on, I now find myself hiding just slightly in the shadows of the fire station bay and watching to see when Eva might walk out of the office.
Although I know my heart can’t take it, I have to see her. I have to watch her walk out of my life. Maybe then I will be able to really believe this is over. Maybe then I will really accept the fact that she's gone months from now when my heart continues to drown in pain.
Rex walks out of the station and into the garage.
It doesn’t take him long to turn and look at the scene unfolding in front of me.
A nightmare I can’t turn away from. With a heavy sigh, he walks a few more steps and leans with me against the fire engine.
“You know, it doesn’t have to be like this.
You can have your cake and eat it, too.”
I glare at him. “Don’t you have a club to run somewhere? Why are you always here when I don’t need your bullshit advice?”
He laughs. “Ah, come on now. You know your life would be boring as hell if I were not around.”
Movement across the street catches my eye. Glancing back up, Eva emerges from the office and I catch my breath. I want to run to her. I want to stop her. To tell her that I am crazy. That what I said yesterday was the biggest damn lie I ever told in my life.
I have no intention of marrying Becky. Not now, not ever. But I had to say something. Something I knew would make her leave. I had to give her a reason not to stay. To move on and get back to a life full of possibilities and promises. Ones I can’t give her while I am tied to this place forever.
“I can’t believe you’re not going to go after her,” Rex fumes.
“We’ve been down this road before,” I groan pushing off the engine and walking across the room. “I chased her, and look where that got me.”
Eva’s laugh floats to me from across the street and pulls to somewhere deep inside of me. She talks to the woman I assume is Mary for a few minutes. Rex doesn’t say a word, just sits with me silently, watching my world walk away and knowing I am not about to do anything to stop it.
Shaking Mary’s hand, Eva opens the car door. She glances up my way, a glimmer of hope shines bright in her eyes. Since I am hiding in the shadows, she sees no one, and the look disappears quickly. She shakes her head once before turning back to say a few more parting words to Mary.
“I just have one question,” Rex says. “Do you honestly think, after everything you two have been through, that you can live without her? Because if you can, let her go. But if watching her walk away is killing you, now might be the only chance you’ll ever get to make it right.”
Something inside me snaps. My feet break out in a run. I cross the street quickly and almost get run over by a car in the process, which earns me a honk and a raised middle finger.
Eva looks across her left shoulder to see what happened and doesn’t even notice I’ve come up on her right side until I grab her arm and swing her towards me. Mary takes a few steps back giving us some space, although Gwen’s smart mouth can always be accounted for.
“Hey, dumbass! What the hell are you thinking almost getting yourself killed!”
I shoot her an irritated look through the open car door before staring back into the eyes of the only woman I could ever love.
“Eva, Don’t go,” I say through rushed breaths.
Stunned, it takes a moment for her to register everything. She takes a step back and looks down at my hand grabbing her arm. When she looks back up at me hesitation lingers across her features.
“Noah? But you said…”
“Damn what I said,” I yell, pulling her in closer.
“I was an idiot. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking.
I’m not marrying Becky. That was just a lie because I thought you deserved better.
But hell, I almost lost you once, I can’t live with myself if I lose you twice.
I thought pushing you away was the right thing because holding you with me is damn selfish.
But, Eva, I can’t breathe if I am not with you.
I can’t live knowing that I won’t be able to wake up to your beautiful smile, never hold you - or make love to you ever again.
I know staying with me isn’t the future you always dreamed of, but God, if you stay with me, I promise I will do everything in my power to make up for all you lost.”
Her eyes search mine. I pull her close, she doesn’t hug me back. But that doesn’t matter. I pull away and take both of her hands in mine. A shocked look graces her features.
“I know you probably should go. I know staying with me will always hold you back. But damn it, Eva, I promise if you stay with me I will love you every damn day. I will never ever stop making you happy. I will never again stop fighting for us. I can’t let you walk out of my life without knowing I did everything I could to stop you.
To keep you here where you’ll always be loved. Where I promise to never….”
She smiles and slowly puts her finger up to my lips.
“No more running,” she whispers.
I smile as I frame her face with my hands.
“Never,” I insist as I pull her face towards mine and greedily take a kiss I never thought I would taste again.
“Well, it’s about damn time,” Gwen says, breaking up our tender moment. I smile against Eva’s lips. She laughs before breaking our contact. Still, I hold her close not ready to let her go. Not when I finally man up-ed and did what I should have done a long ass time ago.
“Does this mean maybe you can start sooner?” Mary asks. My brow furrows as I look at Eva. She smiles at me mischievously before turning to Mary.
“I’ll see what I can do. Thanks again for everything, Mary. I will call you when I get back home and let you know my time frame.”
“Looking forward to it,” Mary says, but my eyes are still glued on the woman in front of me. “Have a safe flight, we’ll talk soon.”
Mary leaves as Eva turns to look at me.
“What does she mean, ‘start sooner?’” I ask.
Eva shrugs. “Well, there was no need for both of us to be stubborn,” she laughs. “I didn’t turn down the job. See, the truth is, even if you hadn’t come to your senses, I already made up my mind. You’re kind of stuck with me. What was it you told me once? ‘It’s time you start accepting it.’”
Her grin is contagious as I pull her in until I can almost taste her lips against mine. “Is that so, Ms. Monroe?”
“Mhm,” she purrs deliciously as she melts into my arms. I am moments away from tasting her - savoring her - before just like clockwork, Gwen’s annoying voice breaks us apart.
“I hate to intrude,” she buts in. “But there is still a flight to catch in about two hours.”
“The lady will catch a later flight,” I say without hesitation.
Eva smiles as her eyebrows shoot up challenging me.
“I think the lady can decide that for herself,” Gwen retorts.
“You heard the man,” Eva smiles, never taking her eyes off mine.
I pull her close and kiss the tip of her nose.
“I’m never letting you go again, darlin’.
Come hell or high water, nothing, and no one will ever come between us.
You have my word.” Pulling back slightly, I glance to my right.
“Gwen, do you think you have time to take Eva back to my mother’s?
” Looking back at the woman I love I hug her a little tighter and explain.
“I’m still on shift for another couple of hours. ”
She shakes her head, smiling. “There is no place I’d rather wait.”
I kiss the top of her head and can barely tear myself away from her. The next few hours are going to be hell waiting to have her back in my arms.
“Yeah, yeah!” Gwen says coming around the car and smiling. “Hurry up and kiss her goodbye, Romeo. Even if she is staying, I still have a plane to catch.”
As much as we may not always get along, I smile at Gwen as I release Eva and she pulls me into a big hug.
“Glad you came to your senses, Noah,” she hugs me tight. A small understanding, a slight acceptance passes between the two of us. Releasing me, she turns to Eva. Without saying a word, she pulls her close and hugs her just the same.
“I told you. Not all who wander are lost. You made the right choice, Eva. I’m happy for you.”
Tears fill Eva’s eyes as Gwen releases her and wipes a few that have fallen from her own.
Rounding the car, Gwen climbs into the driver’s seat and waits patiently.
Kissing Eva briefly, I ache as I let her go even if it’s only for a few hours until I get off shift.
She releases me with a smile. I watch her climb into the passenger side and I close the door behind her.
“I love you,” I tell her. “More than you’ll ever know.”
“Remember, talk is cheap Mr. Stewart. Come home to me in one piece and show me how much you love me,” she winks.
I laugh remembering the first time I heard those words from her lips. She blows me a kiss, and Gwen steps on the gas and takes off from the curb.
With a sigh of relief, I turn my attention back to the station across the street and cross traffic. As I come to the sidewalk, my stare catches Rex’s. A smug smile pulls across his annoying face.
“Not one word,” I grin as I enter the station.
Before Rex can speak, someone enters the bay. I turn to see Becky standing at the entrance. She crosses her arms over her chest and gives me a determined look.
“Probably not a good time,” Rex says to her.
“Save it, Rex,” she hisses. “I’ll talk to Noah when and how I like.”
“What is it, Becky?” I sigh. “How have you come to ruin my day this time?”
Her Cruella de Vil laugh grates on my last nerve as she walks a few more steps toward me. “Oh, honey, you haven’t seen anything yet. Don’t push me!”
How I could have ever fallen in love with her is beyond me. A woman I would have once given up everything for now I now can’t stand the sight of.
“I’m just making sure that you will, in fact, be stopping by later to see Bentley,” she demands when I don’t speak.
“I told you I would,” I shrug. “That hasn’t changed since yesterday. Speaking of which, where is our son since you obviously are not with him?”
She flings her hair over her shoulder and grins. “Momma has him. She’s taking him shopping for early birthday presents. It’s not every year you celebrate your first birthday.”
I close my eyes and remember where I was a year ago right now. I’m just damn glad I managed to save myself moments ago from making another horrible mistake before it was too late.
Opening my eyes, Becky takes a few steps closer until she comes toe to toe with me. Her hand raises and she brushes her fingers across my badge on my shirt. “It’s been a long time, Noah, but I still have never forgotten how good it was. Have you?”
Grabbing her hand and jerking it back from my shirt I say, “I’m talking to you for only one reason, my son. So, let’s get a few things straight. There will be nothing between us. Not now. Not ever. You got that?”
Becky stiffens. “No one turns me down.”
“Well,” I chuckle. “Looks like I just did. You know where the door is, Becky. Don’t let it hit you in the ass on the way out.”