22. Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Two
Evalina
Having seriously underestimated how much a team of eight-year-old boys could consume after a big win, I stare at a sink filled to the brim with dirty dishes, a kitchen very much worse for the wear, and three exhausted helpers.
At least Sparkly’s had a grand exit party, and doing it for the children made it even better.
Eleanor Dawson pushes off the wall and sighs. “Better dig into this.”
“Oh gosh, you don’t have to stick around and help me clean up.
” I wave her off, working hard not to be jealous.
She’s clearly not interested in Koa, not even a hair, but her constant presence has hindered any sort of opportunity for conversation with him.
There’s no mistaking he has something on his mind with those sly smiles he shares with Dustin and his knowing glances my way.
“Yeah, scram,” Koa adds, but his gaze shifts to Annie as well.
“You’d like it if your babysitter would disappear, wouldn’t you?” Eleanor teases, but grabs her bag, nonetheless. “I actually have a ton of work to get done if you don’t mind.”
“No worries at all. I appreciate your help with the party.” Truthfully, she had no reason to want to stick around for a kids’ party other than ensuring the media didn’t intrude.
There hasn’t been a whiff of a reporter lately, which is a blessing in itself, but I suppose you never know what turns the Keaton case might take.
“We’ll lock up behind you. No reason to suspect there will be any newsworthy arguments or…other things,” Koa adds. He and Eleanor share a heavy glance that’s not meant for me, so I turn my attention to Annie.
She watches the whole thing unfold like a soap opera.
“Oh, stop it.” I swat her with a towel and commence with cleaning.
“Better stake your claim while you have the chance is all I’m saying.” Annie pushes her glasses up and grabs a wet rag from the sink. “I’m going to wipe the tables down, then give you two some privacy.”
“Annie, don’t be ridiculous. We don’t need privacy.” Please give us privacy.
With a chuckle, she leaves the kitchen to complete her task.
There’s a sense of something different in the air, though I can’t put my finger on it exactly.
The once tense moments between Koa and me have softened, and I find myself wondering what might become of this friendship.
I’m a fool, honestly, if I think I stand a chance of winning this man’s heart, but the way he is with Dustin makes me want to try.
Heaviness aches in my gut, and I know it isn’t only my son’s happiness I long for.
I’m tired, so tired of working so hard, of having hope only to watch it burn out every time.
I don’t need a completely comfortable and worry-free life, of course, but to have one day, just one day of peace, would restore me.
I pray for guidance because I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.
As Dustin gets older, he’ll need more and more exposure to good, godly men to guide him.
If Nick is any example, then I’ve heartily proven I’m a terrible judge of men, let alone men that I would trust to guide Dustin.
There is a perfectly handsome, generous man in the kitchen with me who seems to adore my son as much as I do, but could he feel the same about me?
Not only for now, for the fleeting time it takes to get from fresh and new to that first hurdle, but for the long term.
The all-in sort of commitment is the only right one in this situation, and all I can think about is whether my heart is open enough to accept him if that is truly what he’s offering us.
“What are you thinking about?” Koa leans against the sink beside me. “Hopefully not drowning me, because you’re a very aggressive dish washer.”
I note that I have a death grip on the rag in one hand and on a plate in the other. I’ve probably washed it five times already while my mind wandered.
“I’m a little tired, I guess. Too much sunshine and excitement for one day.” I force a smile, hoping he buys it rather than question that has me so worked up. Could I fall in love with this man? Would he want me to? Or are his affections for me purely an extension of his affection for my son?
“Think you can handle a little more excitement? Like, say, a walk down River Street after dinner?”
“Um…” I swallow hard, unable to look him in the eye while he stands so close. A date? Is that a date? Only one way to really know for sure, and that’s to see if he’s extending the offer to Dustin as well. “I don’t have a sitter for Dustin tonight.”
“Annie said she’d watch him.” Koa smiles and leans closer. “Come to dinner with me tonight, Lina. I’ll show you how much more you’re worth than that loser Nick ever could. You need a proper date after that shambles.”
Ugh. Why did he have to bring up the thing that’s got me so worried? What if I’m misjudging Koa too? What if he’s merely better at hiding his jerky qualities than Nick? Probably no chance of that, given our first few interactions, now that I think about it.
I can’t decide what to say, so I buy myself some time. “You already asked Annie to watch Dustin? You were that sure I’d say yes?”
“I was that sure I’d convince you, yes.” Koa pulls the rag and plate from my hands, drops them in the water, and tugs me closer, wet hands and all.
“There’s no sense in dancing around this anymore.
I adore Dustin, and I happen to have growing feelings for his mother as well.
I’d like for us to discuss that, if you’re willing. ”
“Koa, I don’t know. Dustin has admired you for so long, I can’t imagine something happening between us to ruin that for him.” I dry my hands to give me some space, a little breathing room between us.
“Dooming us before we even try?” He leans against the sink again, and I wonder if he’s feeling the same way as me. Lightheaded, on the verge of something terrifying, so much so that I need to sit.
I move aside some bags of flour and hop onto the counter, far too tired to think clearly, but it seems this is it.
This is the moment where we must decide where to go from here—remain friends and give Dustin the opportunity to get to know his most admired baseball player, or dive into a relationship that could ruin that forever.
“It isn’t that. Obviously, my track record with men is suspect and should probably be studied.
Of course, that means I’m nervous to agree to a date with you, especially since Dustin’s feelings toward you are clearly…
” My voice fades as I realize how much my son has grown close to Koa.
He felt safe enough to call him when he thought I was in trouble, is supremely happy when he spends time with Koa, and Koa is so…
so…fatherly toward Dustin. I hadn’t understood it until now, hadn’t processed what it might mean, but it’s clear as day to me now.
I’m the only one with hesitations. I’m the one in the way of this actually working, but who can blame a single mom who hasn’t proven a good judge of character in the past for being cautious now?
“What’s your favorite place in the whole world, Lina?” Koa asks, pushing off the wall again to meet me at the counter. He stands beside me, face to face, waiting for an answer.
“Anywhere my son is,” I admit, my throat tightening. That familiar burn in my eyes threatens to spring forth a fresh bout of tears. “I can’t imagine life without him, and when I’m away from him my heart aches until I’m with him again.”
Koa brushes tears from my face, tames the wild strands of my hair that have escaped my ponytail, and takes a deep breath.
“Then let’s change the plan. You, me, and Dustin take a walk down River Street together, watch the sunset, and we see how this thing might work for all of us. What do you think?”
His thumb brushes over my cheek again, and I find my head nodding without thought.
I know he wants time alone with me, he’s made that clear enough, but once again he is sacrificing his wants for my need.
I need time with my son. There’s so little of it as there is, and I’ve already made the colossal mistake of wasting some of it on a horribly failed date.
“Good, let’s get this catastrophe cleaned up, we’ll go home and get cleaned up, then meet back here at, say, eight?”
I nod again.
“Great, now, do you have a fairy godmother who might come and help us clean?”
“Nope, just Annie and me these days.” I hop from the counter, ready to get it done so Dustin and I can enjoy an evening together with a man who, despite our original meet disaster, has found himself digging a little space in my heart.
I have a feeling it’s only going to grow larger no matter what my mind has to say about it.
“I was afraid of that.” With a chuckle, he gets back to cleaning up the mess we made while I dive back into the dishes. Dustin and Annie chat out front, their conversation mostly indecipherable until I hear Dustin tell Annie his plan is working out.
Annie seems to know what the plan is and asks him to clarify what he’s done. Dustin tells her he talked to Koa about me and told him that I smile more than I ever have when I’m around him. My cheeks heat. Do I smile more around Koa?
“I want Mom to marry him, and I’m going to keep getting them to spend time together. I think it’ll work,” Dustin says.
“I can explain,” Koa says, popping up beside me. “I was going to tell you about him coming to me, but the party happened and—”
“It’s okay, really.” My cheeks burn. Gracious, how they burn knowing my son had a full conversation with this man about marrying me. Whatever the details, I’m embarrassed as I can be.
“You’re sure?” He winces as if he’s prepared to get hit with wet dishes.
I nod.
“You’re not going to throw things at me because your son spilled the beans on you having the hots for me?”
My mouth falls open. “I never said that!”
“I don’t know,” he taunts. “He seems pretty sure you have feelings for me. I’m just saying, if there’s anything you need to tell me, now is—”