Chapter 29
THIS AND THAT
‘This and That’ is a song about how when you’re so different to someone, but it just works. It’s me and Luc down to a tee.
‘Hello,’ I call into the warm hallway as soon as I’ve turned the key in the lock on Mauve’s front door.
Rory’s laughter greets me, shortly followed by Jess’s low voice.
Mauve is clattering about in the kitchen on my right and Mimi is with her, arguing about how long the potatoes should be boiled for before they go into the oven.
I was close to not coming. I don’t think I will ever trust Mauve again. Not after how she’s acted. But if I want to be at Rory’s birthday meal, I must see Mauve too.
There are so many people here to be our buffer, anyway.
Luc takes my bag, holding it with the small gift bag for Rory, while I take off my raincoat and scrape my shoes against the doormat. I slip them off my feet and place them neatly next to the front door.
I pop my head around the kitchen door. ‘Hi, Mauve. Mimi! Hi!’ I call.
They both drop the argument and turn to me. Mimi comes to the doorway, but Mauve doesn’t move from the other side of the kitchen.
‘How are you doing?’ Mimi asks.
‘I’m good!’ I reply. ‘My legs ache and the tiredness is setting in.’ I tuck my hair behind my ear and smile. ‘But I’m good. I’m enjoying it.’
‘How are you?’ I ask Mimi, ignoring Mauve banging about in the background.
‘Your mum wants to put the roast potatoes for five minutes boiling and thirty in the oven,’ Mimi groans.
I still ignore Mauve’s presence.
‘They do need about fifteen minutes boiling,’ Luc explains. ‘And then you want to dry them off with some kitchen roll or something and batter them around in the pan to get a fluff on the edges… Honestly, you’ll want to put them in the oven for closer to fifty minutes.’
‘You’re all insane,’ Mauve pouts.
‘Please try it,’ Mimi begs. We’re all dreading another round of Mauve’s pale, hard-in-the-middle potatoes.
‘You won’t be disappointed, Mrs Martin,’ Luc says.
‘Oh, Luc, if this one can’t even call me Mum, you can call me Mauve, too.’
‘Noted, Mauve,’ Luc smiles, his teeth set together.
I hate how polite we’re being. How sick it’s making me feel. But I know Luc doesn’t have it in him to be confrontational. It’s not like I do either. I’m here, aren’t I?
I grab his hand and lead him through to the living room where Jess and Rory are still giggling over something on the sofa. I hand Rory the small gift bag. ‘Happy birthday, Ror.’
‘Thanks, Sie.’
I perch on the tiny slither of sofa next to Jess and wrap my arms around her.
Luc goes for a sofa on the other side of the room, and I can feel his eyes on me, drawing me back to him in some sort of magnetic force.
Luc’s gaze brushes over me like watercolour on a canvas, peppering my skin with blushes and scarlets.
We gifted Rory a special pen to do his lawyering with.
I could buy him anything he wants in the world, and he always tells me not to get him anything.
I could buy him a bigger house or something right next to his office, but he’s happy in his three-bedroom semi-detached on the outskirts of London. I kind of love it, to be honest.
Mimi comes in carrying a bowl of crisps and a little pot of dip for us to tuck into.
My knees feel like they creak when I get up, before joining Luc on the other sofa.
I really need this week off touring. It’s come at the perfect time after a month on the road.
Luc’s arm drapes over my shoulder, and I relax into the crook of his body, my muscles loosening.
My eyes are heavy and, honestly, I could fall asleep right here.
‘So,’ Rory clears his throat. ‘You two aren’t faking it anymore, are you.’ It’s more a statement than a question.
In the month since everything was resolved, I’ve never explicitly told Rory, even Mimi, that Luc and I are no longer faking it. I especially haven’t told Mauve. I presumed after the expiry date for our fake break-up passed, they would use their powers of deduction to figure it out for themselves.
I gaze at Luc and a smile gently pulls at the edges of his mouth.
I’m waiting for him to confirm. To confirm what he also thinks: that it hasn’t been fake to either of us for months.
Not since pottery painting. Not since he started doing all those nice things for me which weren’t for the purpose of someone seeing it online to believe we were in love.
He just keeps looking at me, the smile curling up with every moment that passes. Luc raises his eyebrows, gesturing for me to talk.
‘Yeah.’ My voice breaks. I’m still looking at Luc. ‘We’re not faking it anymore.’
Luc squeezes my hand, and I rest my head on his shoulder, letting the feeling of his body on mine wash over me.
‘I knew it,’ Rory shakes his head almost in disbelief. ‘I thought it at your launch, Sie, but because your speech was everywhere online, I thought maybe it was an exquisitely executed plan.’
‘I’m good, but I’m not that good.’ Mimi enters the room with two glasses of wine, one for Rory and one for Jess. Both red. ‘Sienna, Luc?’
‘I’ll grab white if there is any,’ I say, and Luc opens his mouth to talk. ‘Luc will have red,’ I finish. ‘So, Jess.’ I turn to my best friend. ‘How was the date last night?’
‘Don’t,’ Rory warns, but he’s holding in a laugh.
‘He asked if he could have a quick nap.’
‘What?’ Luc splutters, and Rory nearly spits out his wine.
‘Where were you? For him to be able to take a nap?’ I say.
Luc’s finger runs up and down my arm, leaving trails of goosebumps in its wake.
‘We were in a bar in central. He asked and… how do you say no?’
‘How long had you been there? What time is he taking a nap? Wait, start from the beginning. I want the whole story,’ I insist.
Jess sighs. ‘Well, the pub was really busy, so we sat in the garden. Well… on a bench on the side of the road.’ She pauses.
‘We’d been there for about an hour and a half, and we’d had a few glasses of wine and some general bar food – you know, crisps, peanuts, etcetera.
’ She pauses and shakes her head, trying and failing to swallow her laugh.
‘And then he told me he hadn’t slept well the night before, but he was having a really nice time and didn’t want to leave, so could he have a quick nap? ’
‘Jess, that is actually insane,’ I howl.
‘The worst part is my sister set me up with him.’
‘What did you do?’ Luc asks, shaking his head. ‘When he asked if he could take this nap?’
‘I couldn’t really say no, could I?’
I can’t stop myself from crying with laughter. ‘Please tell me you left after that.’
‘I couldn’t! He was asleep on my scarf!’
I can’t be held responsible for the noise that erupts from the back of my throat. ‘That is gold.’
‘I really love everyone laughing at my expense,’ Jess pouts.
‘Sorry, Jess. You’ll see the funny side of it one day,’ Rory reassures.
‘I’ve also had some terrible dates,’ Luc says. ‘If you want to laugh at my expense.’
‘Go on,’ I urge.
‘Well, there was this really weird one at the theatre where there was a line…’
‘Luc!’ I laugh. ‘You can’t use me as your terrible date story.’
‘Good job it wasn’t a terrible date,’ he smirks. ‘I just wanted to tell the story.’
Mimi seems to have gotten her way in the kitchen because the roast potatoes that eventually come out are perfect.
Crispy and golden on the outside, fluffy on the inside.
I’ve never tasted anything like it coming out of Mauve’s kitchen.
In fact, the entire dinner tastes like Mimi cooked it with Mauve believing she was still in charge.
Everyone tucks in, making slight groaning sounds at the backs of their throats when the food melts into their mouths.
‘So, Luc,’ Rory starts through a mouthful of honey-glazed carrots. ‘What are your intentions with my sister?’
Everyone is stunned into silence before the laughter starts.
‘What?’ Rory joins the laughter. ‘She’s never brought someone back here before!’
‘I can’t work out if I’m supposed to answer this or not,’ Luc admits.
‘You’re good, mate. Just don’t hurt her,’ Rory says.
‘Rory, being the overprotective younger brother doesn’t suit you,’ Jess laughs.
‘I agree,’ I nod.
‘Jess is right,’ Mauve pipes in, a resounding laughter reverberating around the group, but I don’t react.
The table falls back into silence, and this feeling of contentment settles over me. This feeling of I could be happy with this. I don’t need anything else. The memories, the fact I’ve done it, is enough for me.
Everyone knows this is my last tour. The last time it’ll be Rory’s birthday and I’m back, bleary-eyed, from the other side of Europe for a week.
‘I’d really love to make amends with you, Sienna,’ Mauve says, a mouthful of potato. ‘I know what I did was wrong, but I was only trying to protect you. To make you see that you were hurting yourself.’
‘Not here, Mauve,’ I grumble. ‘Not now. Not on Rory’s birthday.’
‘I know you’ll find it hard to trust me again, but please can we try?’
‘I just said…’
‘I know you did, but I need you to listen to me. To hear me. I have learned a lot in these past few months. Rory has really helped me to see what I’ve done wrong.’
I nod. She’s my mother, I’ll have to give her a chance. I don’t get another one, and I’ve already lost so many people. I won’t ever trust her again, but it’s not as simple to cut her out like everyone else. ‘Okay. Let’s try.’
‘So, what’s next for Sienna Martin then?’ Rory asks.
I chew my food slowly.
‘I want to be in one place for more than a few months at a time. I want to feel like I actually live in my home. To decorate it, rather than it looking like a not-lived-in-show-home. To have food in my fridge.’
‘What are your plans for Odes and Ballads?’ Mimi asks.
‘I need to speak to the producer, but I see it as an acoustic album.’ I skewer a carrot.
‘I think we’ll be able to drop it at the end of the tour next year.
’ Everyone continues eating. ‘An acoustic album doesn’t really suit a full stadium tour, so I think I will drop the album and then retire.
’ I place the carrot on the end of my tongue.
‘Maybe in a few years… I’ll drop another album so that I’ll have released ten – I was thinking potentially a compilation of songs I’ve written but haven’t made it on the albums, because they don’t fit or whatever.
But this will be my last tour.’ I pause for a few seconds.
‘You both, Kareem, Dennis, will all still have jobs.’
‘Don’t worry about us, Sienna. We’ll do whatever you want us to do,’ Mimi smiles but there’s almost a sadness behind it. ‘The end of an era.’
‘The tour doesn’t end until next November. We’ve got a little while yet.’ I pick up my fork again and stab a parsnip. ‘I have an idea of something I’d love to do.’
I look at Luc and he raises an eyebrow.
‘I’m listening…’
‘Would you like to use your writing skills to write a musical with me?’
Luc’s eyes widen and he uses his napkin to dab gravy from the corners of his mouth. ‘Oh my god. I would love that.’
‘I would love to sell a musical written by you two, after how well I sold your relationship,’ Mimi laughs, and the rest of the room joins her.
‘I’m sure Lindsay would want a piece of this action.’
Mimi brushes her hair over her shoulder. ‘I’m sure I can find something for your agent to do.’
‘Wow,’ Jess whispers. ‘I can’t believe you’re going to be Sienna Martin with a little s and a little m for a while.’
I exhale loudly. ‘I can’t wait.’
‘Neither can I.’ Luc leans over and presses a kiss to my temple. ‘I’ll follow you, wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do.’