1. - – Charlotte
CHAPTER ONE
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CHARLOTTE
I ran to the bathroom, slamming and locking the door. Tears sting the cut on my cheek as I slide down the door. My butt meets the cold floor, and I cover my mouth to trap the ugly sobs. I hear heavy footsteps coming to the door, and my body tenses.
“Charlotte, baby, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to! I promise it won’t happen again.” Jeff pleads with me while trying to open the door.
Yeah, right, I thought bitterly. The same promise that is always broken. But this time, he actually laid hands on me. Most of the time, it was yelling, hitting walls, and throwing things. But that look in his eyes as his fist made contact with my face will haunt me for the rest of my life.
The doorknob keeps rattling. I lay my head back against the door, thinking about my options. My mind races towards calling my brother. But we haven’t talked in a year. Jeff kept telling me my brother hated him and was going to ruin our relationship. So, me, being the idiot I am, cut him off.
With shaky hands, I pull my phone out of my pocket and open it to the contacts. My finger hovers over his number, but hearing Jeff’s heavy breathing on the other side of the door helps push me to hit the button. It rings and rings. After the fourth ring, I hear his voice.
“Hello?” Chad says hesitantly.
“Chad...” I say quietly.
“Charlotte? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” He asks.
“He…he hit me,” I whisper.
The phone is quiet, and I’m scared Chad hung up.
“He fucking put his hands on you? Where are you right now?” He asks with anger in his tone.
“I’m in the bathroom with the door locked. Please come get me.” I plead.
“Stay there. I’m on my way.” He says and hangs up.
I pull my knees up to my chest and lay my head on them and cry into my knees. The doorknob rattles harder.
“Charlotte? Please let me in,” Jeff says.
I shake my head, knowing he can’t see me.
My mind is replaying the fight. It was all over me, asking him to help.
A cold look crossed his face, and he slammed his fist into my cheek.
I remember standing there with my hand on my cheek, staring at him.
He didn’t even seem bothered before he punched me again, this time in the mouth, causing me to bite through my lip.
I remember falling to the ground and him standing over me. All I could feel was fear and shock.
I hear someone pounding on the door, and Jeff walking away to answer it.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I hear Jeff ask, and then something slams into the wall.
The voices are muffled, but I can hear fists meeting a body and Jeff whimpering like the little bitch he is.
I hear voices, but I can’t make out what they are saying, then I hear a door slam.
My heart is racing. I wasn’t sure what was going on until there was a soft knock on the door.
“Hey, Char… it’s safe, that asshat is gone.” Chad's voice carries through the door.
I slowly get up on shaky legs, unlock the bathroom door, and cautiously open it.
The moment my eyes meet Chad’s, new tears begin to roll down my cheeks.
Chad’s eyes soften as he takes in my appearance, but his eyes lock on my busted lip and bruised cheek.
He swears softly and pulls me into a deep hug.
I sob into his chest as he rubs my back, whispering he’s got me and I am now safe.
“Yo, Chad. Want me to start packing her stuff?” A deep voice calls out.
I instantly stiffen and cling harder to Chad.
“Hey. It’s okay, that's Theodore. He’s a good friend of mine and would never hurt you,” Chad whispers against my head.
I want to believe, I really do, but after everything that happened, I’m not sure anymore.
Chad walks me over to the couch and has me sit down while they pack everything that belongs to me.
I sit there staring blankly at the wall, my brain trying to process everything that happened.
Did I miss the signs? I mean, Jeff convinced me to cut Chad out of my life, but that was due to Jeff saying Chad was trying to block and ruin everything.
Was anything Jeff told me these past four years true?
Am I broken? I start to cry again. Blaming myself, because let's be honest, this is all probably my fault.
I feel the couch sink from someone sitting down. I whip my head up and see Theodore sitting next to me. He has his hands on his knees, palms up, as if telling me he isn’t a threat. But even with that gesture, my body goes rigid.
“Hey, so I know you don’t know me, but from everything Chad has told me about you, I feel like I’ve known you my whole life.
I’m sorry for what that piss ant has done to you, but here’s some harsh words that a lot of people won’t say: Yeah, you were in a shitty situation, but from what I was told, you’re a smart girl with this big, amazing brain.
Yet, you chose to let a man basically control you and tell you what to do and who should and shouldn’t be in your life.
And to me, that seems pretty dumb, but, hey, love makes people do stupid things.
But I bet I know what’s playing in your mind.
This is all your fault, you’re stupid… Well, in a way, yes, but that doesn’t matter.
But let me tell you something, you took the biggest and most important step in this whole ass mess.
You called for help, and you’re leaving him.
That is the biggest step that a lot of people don’t take until it's almost too late,” He says while looking at his hands.
I didn’t notice how relaxed my body got while he was talking. My brain started to panic, but my body was flipping my brain off. I look down at the floor while processing everything.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
His head whips up, and he looks at me with a raised eyebrow. “Thank you?” he asks.
I start laughing at his confused face. In all honesty, I’m confused as well. I keep laughing; it feels so good to laugh. I can’t remember the last time I laughed this hard and this carefree.
“Umm, Theo… did you break my sister?” Chad asks from the doorway.
We both turn and look at Chad. I bite my lip to keep from laughing. Chad has a sad smile on his face while he looks at the both of us.
“Everything has been packed, I just need to know if you want to double-check and make sure we got all that belongs to you, or if we need to get more boxes,” he says while rubbing the back of his neck.
I close my eyes briefly and let out a deep breath. “Umm, yeah… I’ll go take a look.”
I get up and walk towards the bedroom, and dread slowly creeps into my bones as I push the door open.
I stand in the doorway and just look. All of my stuff is gone, leaving just Jeff’s belongings.
Anger starts to burn its way through my chest. I grab the lamp on the dresser near the door and throw it against the wall.
A horrible scream leaves my mouth as I step into the room and just destroy everything I can get my hands on.
THEODORE
I slightly flinch, hearing Charlotte screaming. I see Chad start to stand up from the corner of my eye.
“No, stop. She needs to do this. But she needs to do this by herself. She’s processing, and right now, if you walk into that room and try to comfort her, she’s going to shut down and bury that shit so deep that it will program into her brain.
And any other relationship she gets into after this will be with guys ten times worse than that shit bag,” I say softly.
I feel Chad staring at the side of my face, I don’t look at him.
I sit there silently listening to Charlotte destroy that room and cry her heart out.
My hands are clenched tightly into fists on top of my lap.
Every fiber of my being is screaming to go in there and help her. But just like I told Chad, we can’t.
“Theo...” Chad starts to say, but closes his mouth.
I let out a deep sigh. “My sister… Angel went through something like this. And instead of us letting her process everything and giving her time to heal, we all smothered her in love and comfort. Yes, that is really good for someone going through this, but we did it too soon. She never got the chance to process. She just buried everything deep and lived her life. One asshole to the next until she got to the last one… At first, it was just yelling, then it led to hitting, which led to him choking her. Until one day, he, umm, killed her. We never saw the signs because she got good at hiding them.”
We both sat there in silence, Chad trying to process everything, and my reliving my past. I feel silent tears running down my face, and I briefly glance at Chad and see tears running down his face as well.
Not a lot of people know that, besides my family.
It’s a dark part of my family. My father blames himself for not protecting his daughter, and my mother blames my father and herself.
Both of my brothers… I’m not sure; none of us really talks anymore.
Angel was the glue that held us together, and once she was gone, so was the hold.
I know Chad is different, and he wants to be there, like me for my sister.
But he needed to wait for her to come to him.
Easier said than done, especially with the sobs and screams coming from the bedroom.
“I don’t know what to do, man, this is killing me,” Chad whispers.
I nod my head, “I know, but showing up when she called is a good start. Now we wait for her to come out and need you more,” I say.
CHARLOTTE
I stand there in front of the bed, my chest heaving and my face flushed red.
I take a look around the room, and a small smile dances across my face.
That felt fucking amazing. My eyes sweep across his torn clothes, to the smashed lamp, to his prized Xbox smashed into pieces.
I fucking bought that good-for-nothing bastard all this.
Thinking I was in love with him, that this is what you do for those you love.
And what did I get back? Fucked up mental health, a busted lip, and a black eye.
Tears begin to burn my eyes. These aren’t the sad, poor me, tears; these are the angry, I’m going to kill you, tears.
I walk out of the destroyed bedroom and go into the living room. I see Theodore and Chad sitting on the couch, not moving. I clear my throat and watch as both of them snap their heads toward me.
“Umm, I’m sorry for that little moment I had in there,” I say softly, looking down at my feet.
I hear someone get up and walk toward me. I keep my gaze focused on my feet, scared to see the shame and frustration written across either of their faces.
“Char…” Chad starts to say, causing my head to snap up and look at him.
The moment our eyes meet, he pulls me into a bear hug and just holds me, which causes me to break down once again and ugly cry.
He rubs my back while whispering to me that it’s okay.
I bury my face into his chest and just sob like there is no tomorrow.
Feeling my brother’s arms wrapped around me and hearing him telling me I’m so brave and he’s sorry for not trying harder, helps heal a part of me I didn’t notice was broken.
Chad pulls away slightly and looks at me. “Now, since that is all out of your system, did we pack everything that is yours?”
I laugh a little. “Yes, you got everything. But where am I staying?”
“With me, of course, Char. You think I’m going to let you stay in a hotel?” Chad asks.
I look at him and raise an eyebrow. “Won’t that kill whatever game you think you have with the ladies?”
Theodore busts out laughing, and Chad has a hurt look on his face. A smile breaks across my face, and more laughter leaves me. I look at Chad with an innocent look, which causes Theodore to laugh harder.
“You wound me, very deeply,” Chad whines.
I take a step back, leaving the warm embrace of my brother and stare at him, taking him in for the first time since this shit show started.
He has changed. No longer is the brother I cut off five years ago.
The long shaggy hair is cut nice and tight, and he has a slight beard growing.
But his eyes have the same twinkle that they did before.
Tears once again begin to burn the corner of my eyes; I’ve missed so much.
Jeff has taken a lot from me, and I let him because I thought he was the one.
But that turned out to be a cover. Yes, today was the first time he laid hands on me, but year two into our relationship, I saw the real Jeff.
The controlling and insecure little man who thought belittling and gaslighting me made him a real man.
But I had my rose-tinted glasses on and ignored all the red flags, even when those flags were screaming in my face.
“Let’s go, please. I don’t want to be here,” I whisper.