Chapter 15 #2
He nearly tears off the back door and plops me right in, sliding between my legs and slamming the door behind him.
His gaze is animalistic. Primal. Catastrophic.
I lie back against the opposite door to let him come to me, but instead, his arm comes around me and he makes me dizzy as he spins us around.
He’s sitting back against the seat, holding my hips against his and the moan that slips out of me is louder than usual. His is raspier—huskier and sexier and it makes me pulse around profound emptiness.
I yank off his shirt and my sweater is off my body in a blink.
My pants are gone, his are at his knees, and my bra is barely off, simply dangling at my elbows, as I wrap my hand around his cock.
I stroke the beautiful, hard length of him, and lift my hips.
The shudder that comes with the anticipation makes me think I’m having a premature orgasm, pleasuring zinging through me as the head of his cock bumps against my clit.
Rationality hits me then. “Shit. Condom?” I breathe.
Rowan nods, and in mere seconds he’s covered himself with the latex and I’m lowering myself onto him, filling myself, inch by inch, His eyes never leave mine and I can’t find it in me to look away first. My mouth falls open with a sound that’s a mix between a mewl and a moan, and his falls open with the sexiest, deepest moan I’ve ever heard from a man.
“Rowan,” I gasp when I practically feel him in my ribs.
His impatient, tantalizing hands touch every part of my skin they can, reaching up to cup my breasts and toy with my nipples.
Reaching back to grab handfuls of my ass and drag his fingers where we meet and up my slit, circling my sensitive bud and making me shudder. “Fuck. Rowan. I…”
I swallow and let my body take over. I let my body lead the way, steal the show, and take what it wants from him.
“Rowan,” I moan. “T-Talk to me. I need…oh my god.” Rowan slams up into me hard, just as I come down from a bounce. “Shit.”
His teeth scrape across my nipple and my back arches. “What do you want to hear, sweetheart?” His hands grab my ass, moving me harder and faster—rougher. “That you ride my cock like it’s yours. That you look so fucking sexy like this, with me buried inside of you.”
“Mhhm,” I whimper. My head falls back, my back bends, and I don’t know if I’m real anymore. “More.”
I hear his huffy excuse of a laugh. “You want me to tell you you’re a good girl, sweetheart? That you’re my good girl riding me like this. Fuck—Fuck!”
“Yes.”
I think my bones are about to break and shatter. Then they finally do with his hands tight around my waist, alternating between moving me up and down and in figure eights. I can’t breathe, I can’t think. The only words either one of us seem to know are each other’s name, and I think that’s enough.
“Fuck, sweetheart,” he grits through his teeth.
My body comes back to reality and I crash against his chest, my face buried in the crook of his neck. Breathless, I murmur, “I think I’m dead.”
My eyes flutter even though they’re already closed and I bask in the feel of his hands mapping my skin.
His fingers traces lines and rivers and roads like he’s planning a journey and needs to memorize the way to his destination.
They rest at a stop sign, lingering over my ribs, counting each road bump he encounters.
Then he moves, his fingertips like light taps as he counts each ridge of my spine. His fingers go up, up, up, and then his hand is cupping the back of my neck and urging me back to face him.
“Look at me,” he begs, “please.”
I sit back as far as he’ll let me with his arms around my back to keep me close. My hands remain limp on his shoulders, letting his warmth and skin burn through my palms. He reaches up and pushes a curl back from my sweaty cheek, tucking it behind my ear.
“I hope doing it exclusively in cars isn’t going to be a thing.”
He smiles. “It won’t.”
“Good.”
There’s a silent pause. A moment of his eyes trapping mine and even in the dark are his eyes bright when they look at me.
“You bring me a lot of comfort, Natalia,” he whispers. Another secret for the lamps. “Sometimes I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
I should not have looked at him when he said that. “You mean when you’re horny and lonely?” I try to tease.
Rowan huffs a laugh but it only lasts a second or two. “No. I think that you make up a big part of me.”
I blink. Once. Twice. Thrice. Rapidly, taking in as deep of a breath as I can. “I—”
“I know what you’re going to tell me, but I can’t hear it right now,” Rowan whispers. “I just need to hear you breathe for a while, then I’ll go home.”
“This is dangerous,” I mutter to myself. “This is…”
“My middle name is danger,” he says and I can’t contain the laughter that pours out of me.
“You’re such a dork.” I laugh and smack his shoulder playfully.
His hands hold my waist tight—a heavy comforting touch—and he gives me his boyish grin. “Never mind,” he says. “I needed to hear that instead.”
“Rowan…”
“I know,” he whispers and drops his forehead to my chest. He shakes his head. “You have to go.”
“I…”
He picks up his head and his lips catch mine instantly. My lips part with his and I take advantage of the moment to take a breath before I accept his kiss. All of them.
“You did that to shut me up,” I pant against his mouth, sucking on his tongue.
“I did that so you’d stop thinking too much.”
“I don’t do that.”
“Sure,” he mocks and nips at my bottom lip. “I never want to stop kissing you.”
“You’re going to have to.” I feel him harden again and my body is reacting the way it always does with him. My hips roll involuntarily. “Rowan…”
“At least let me walk you to your door.”
I moan. “Fine. Fuck, Rowan…We have…The co—”
“I know,” he hisses and the kiss is over before I’m ready to stop.
In mostly silence, he removes the condom and discards it in a garbage bag. I put on my clothes, he pulls on his shoes, and we leave the car and enter another world.
I should have stayed in that car with him, safe and protected and in a bubble that’s just me and him.
Rowan walks beside me on my right and his hand reaches out but quickly curls into a fist before he stuffs it into his coat pockets. I have to do the same before I do something silly like that too.
I let us in through the front door, then we’re in the elevator. Then we’re outside my apartment door and I’m pushing the key into the lock.
I don’t want this night to end.
“Um.” I sigh and turn, standing at the threshold. “Do you want to come inside? Play UNO or watch a movie?”
Rowan gives me one of those unbelievably sexy half-smiles. “UNO?”
I nod.
“We can play UNO,” he says.
Rowan follows behind me, placing his jacket on the hook next to mine, leaving his shoes beside mine. Binx meets us at the door and after my loving greeting, Rowan gives her his own, taking her in his arms and letting her curl against his neck.
“She’s so cute,” he says.
I smile at them together. “She’s only a few months old. She’s…an emotional support companion. Or, at least, that’s what I call her.”
“Does she help you?” Rowan kisses the top of her head and scratches under her head, earning himself a purr.
“She does,” I murmur. “I always wanted a black cat. My dads never let us get a pet so…”
Rowan kisses her again and sets her down, letting my little best friend roam around her home freely. “I like her. She loves you.”
“You like her because she loves me?”
“Yeah, you deserve to be loved,” he says. “I like anything that loves you.”
“Hmm, do you want any food?” I ask as I make a beeline for the kitchen. I open and close the fridge and other cabinets several times before I feel his arm come around my waist from behind me.
“What’s going on, Natalia?” Rowan asks in my ear. The tenor of his smooth voice allows my body to relax into his. My head drops back against his chest, my eyes close, and I inhale this moment. “You act like you’re scared of me sometimes. What am I doing?”
I am scared.
“Nothing,” I say. “You aren’t doing anything, I swear.”
“No?” Rowan gingerly turns me in his arms and I lean back against the kitchen counter. “Natalia…”
“Rowan.”
“I see you,” he says. “And when you’re ready to show me more, I’ll be here.”
I swallow. Nod. Absorb his words and appreciate his patience in the few little ways I know how. “I-I’ll get the cards.”
“Do you have Monopoly?”
I arch a brow, my lips tipping up. “Monopoly?”
He smirks. “I fucking love UNO, Nat. But it’s Monopoly.”
I laugh. Rowan Asher has always had a thing for board games. Fucking weirdo. My fucking weirdo. “No, but feel free to bring it next time.”
Rowan releases me with a smile, and I look for the cards in one of the drawers of my entertainment unit while he sits patiently on my couch. I turn to find him with his legs stretched, hands on his lap, eyes dark and on me.
He really knows how to take my breath away without ever trying. Regardless, I sit beside him, knowing that there’s never enough oxygen around him. I begin to shuffle the cards before dealing them.
Shortly after the game begins, I put a plus two on the stack of cards and barely get the word UNO out of my mouth before his lips and mine are fighting for what they want from the other.
Then I’m naked in his arms, he’s naked between my legs, and I’m terrified that he does see me.
That he sees me so clearly and he’s going to love every bit of it instead of shy away.
When we collapse in a heap of nearly nothing, we are boneless and brainless. He draws stars with his fingertips all around my scars as we lie together, and I let him.
And then, with barely any clothing on, we play another round of UNO.