Chapter 3 #2
The music wafts through the room as the guests look ecstatically at the bride and groom, waiting to join them on the dance floor.
“Come on, let’s go,” Nick says. He’s the first to get up, taking Casey by the hand and inviting her to join him.
“Are you staying with Jamie?” Casey asks.
“Sure.”
“Come on, Mr Muscle. Let’s show them how it’s done,” Chris says, getting Ryan to his feet and leading him towards the centre of the room.
I remain at the table alone, watching people rise from their seats to dance to the song.
Leaning back in my chair, I take a few more sips of my drink and let my gaze wander to the other tables.
I can see the Doctor and his son seated two tables away to my left.
They are talking. Evan’s behaviour is like his mother’s: he moves around agitatedly, gesticulates and gradually warms up.
Meanwhile, the Doctor remains calm, only hinting at a smile and shaking his head.
His son’s temperament and mannerisms clearly amuse him.
Then Evan gets up, looks around — perhaps for someone to dance with — and strolls away, leaving his father alone.
Like me, the Doctor is the only person left at his table, but he doesn’t seem uncomfortable.
He’s a discreet man who doesn’t immediately stand out in a crowd.
You wouldn’t turn your head if he walked past you on the street; he doesn’t attract attention at first glance.
Instead, one must take the time to observe, study, and truly understand him.
He has his charms, especially today, dressed in a dark, perfectly fitting suit, with slightly messy hair and a beard that covers his jaw.
He slides his fingers along the rim of the glass, tracing its outline, and then loses himself in the liquid inside it. After a moment, he lets out a sigh.
What do I see? Melancholy? Sadness? A longing to be anywhere but here? Or just loneliness?
Hell, Jamie. Why should you care how the Doctor looks, how he’s feeling, or what he’s thinking?
“Hey,” a hand slides slowly down my shoulder, forcing me to turn away from my close analysis of the Doctor for a moment.
“Back already?” I ask my sister.
“It’s our turn.” Riley grabs my hand and pulls me to my feet. “Ian is dancing with his mother, and well, you are…”
“I’m at your complete service.”
“I’ll stay with Jamie,” Chris says, appearing at the table. “Go on, it’s your moment.”
I guide my sister onto the dance floor. When we reach the centre, a few steps from Ian and his mother, I hold her close, and we start to move slowly.
Riley rests her head on my chest, and I sigh with relief, knowing she is safe and happy. I feel lucky to have witnessed it all. I can finally see her living life to the fullest.
“Thanks for everything, Riley,” I tell her, kissing her on the forehead.
“I don’t—”
“Shh, don’t say anything. No need.”
Riley stays silent, letting the music and me lull her. My gaze barely lifts, as if it already knows exactly where to go.
Only one direction: the wrong one, the most dangerous one.
The one with no way out.
Halfway through the party, I realise the moment I’ve been dreading has arrived — it’s time for my speech. No one actually asked me to give one, but I know I can’t back out. I stand up and clink my glass with a knife.
The room freezes. Conversations cut off, forks hover mid-air. All eyes are on me. I’m used to being the centre of attention, but this is different. I can’t just flash a smile at the crowd and the press. This time I have to bare my soul. I have to be myself, and I’m not good at that.
I clear my throat and awkwardly lift my gaze around the room, not fixing on any particular point.
“I’ve never had a high opinion of the O’Connor brothers,” I begin, which makes the guests laugh. “Don’t be mad at me, O’Connors — you too, James and Karen. You have certainly done a great job. It’s just that some of you are bigger dicks than others.”
There’s more laughter, along with some cursing through clenched teeth, from my table.
“But then I saw Ian looking at my sister. I’d taken her to the Leinster Training Facility to show her what I was doing and how hard I was working.
I wanted to make her proud, because I owe her everything I am today.
” I look at Riley in Ian’s arms, tears streaming down her face.
“And you know, he didn’t look at her like a conquest, a woman he wanted to have fun with.
He looked at her as if she were the missing piece in his life.
But Ian is not the sharpest tool in the box, and it took him a while to understand and accept that.
Definitely not without some help.” Riley smiles through her tears.
“He gave my sister what she dreamed of and deserved, because, Riley, nobody in this world deserves a full and happy life more than you.”
I look away from the bride and groom; otherwise, I won’t be able to continue.
“Ian gave Riley a family. And now there’s little Jamie and…
” I shift my gaze to him. His eyes are fixed on me, but not like everyone else’s.
I know he’s searching for something he shouldn’t be seeking: something so small, dark, and inhospitable it offers nothing, not even for a moment.
His head nods slightly, as if he understands I need a little encouragement — a gentle push to keep going.
It feels like he knows I can’t do this alone.
The warmth of his gaze and the confidence he instils in me give me the strength I need to express my feelings before they overwhelm me.
“You are my whole life, Riley.”
His lips curve upwards now, but I can’t bear it. I can’t hold that smile.
I turn back to my sister.
“You have always been, and you always will be, the most important person in the world to me, along with little Jamie. You are my family, and I love you both immensely. And… Ian,” I say, turning to him, “I’m glad it’s you.”
I take a deep breath and raise my glass. “To you, your wonderful family, and your love. I have never seen two people love each other as much as you do.”
I set my glass down as the room erupts in applause and sink back into my seat, feeling Nick’s hand squeeze my shoulder affectionately. I don’t turn to him.
Instead, I let my gaze rise — just slightly.
I know exactly where to look.
His eyes are already there. He understands now.
He knows where to look, too.