Chapter 16
Janae sat quietly in Adam’s cabin driveway trying to get herself together. Together being a euphemism for being in control of her thoughts and body when she was alone with sexy-ass Adam Henderson for more than five minutes.
“All you gotta do is go in there, show him your plans for the fundraising effort, and keep it moving.”
Her strategy sounded easy and logical. However, having been in Adam’s presence before, she understood the threat that awaited her inside that cabin.
Did she fear for her safety? Not in the literal sense. Adam would never do anything she hadn’t given him permission to do to her. The person she didn’t trust was herself, and how easily she wanted to give in, even before she’d left the confines of her car.
Memories of the time they’d spent together since he arrived home flashed across her mind, and she could feel her need trying its best to take over.
Beyond their kiss on Adam’s tailgate at Monroe Summit, nothing physical had happened between them. Unfortunately, that fact didn’t stop her from desperately wanting more.
“You’re not here for that, Janae. Messy isn’t your thing.” Her organization and attention to detail was known amongst her colleagues. She always prepared for the worst, so she was never caught off guard.
Every time she went into that OR, she checked and rechecked each item on her list from medications on hand to equipment needed, all in an effort to keep her patient safe.
Emergencies didn’t always allow for extensive study, but she usually tried to go through as much of the patient’s chart as she could to help her better anticipate the patient’s needs.
Forethought was her thing. It kept her out of trouble, and more times than she could count, saved the lives of the people she was tasked with caring for. It was her greatest strength, and she only needed to employ it to get over this thing, whatever it was, between she and Adam.
Perhaps you’d be better equipped to do that if you weren’t actually preparing to walk into the lion’s den.
She glanced up into her rearview mirror, glaring at herself as if that would help the situation. It wouldn’t and it didn’t. Even as she found herself climbing out of the car and walking toward the cabin’s porch, she could already tell she was fighting a losing battle.
That sentiment was reinforced when Adam opened the door with a smile on his face that read “Welcome to your destruction.”
“Glad you made it safely. Come on in.”
He stepped aside with an inviting smile in place, and though she knew she should probably turn right back around and get in her car, she let his friendly greeting disarm her and lure her inside.
She might’ve continued to worry about whether or not her presence here was a failure to execute her common sense until a delightful aroma tickled her nose.
“What smells so good?”
“Stew chicken and rice and peas. It’ll be ready to plate up soon.”
Memories of their past assailed her. “Your mom used to make that when we were tutoring Michael, right?”
“Amongst other things,” he answered as he offered her a seat on one of the two sofas facing each other in the living room.
“Whenever the two of you dropped by the house or the cabin, it was always an excuse for her to go overboard with the cooking. With just me and Pops in the house with her, she didn’t often get to make huge meals. ”
“I certainly appreciated her efforts,” Janae said as she took her seat. “All these years of living in Monroe Hills and I still can’t find a decent Jamaican spot.”
He chuckled. “Being second-generation Jamaican and growing up in the South, my mom wasn’t raised with a lot of Jamaican cultural heritage in her home. But her grandfather kept her at his side in the kitchen whenever he’d visit, and fortunately for us, she soaked everything up.”
Janae stood back, taking in Adam and his easy demeanor as he talked about his mother. It was obvious he treasured the woman. Janae could only hope her own son would smile like that when he spoke of her in the future.
“Thank goodness for her grandfather, then. ’Cause your mama’s cooking has ruined me for all of these chain Caribbean food places ’round here.”
“A fact she would be thrilled by, no doubt.” He pointed toward the kitchen door. “Would you like something to drink? I’ve got water, Moscato, and beer.”
She tilted her head to look up at him. Adam was always tall. Even as a kid. But as a grown man, he’d filled out with solid corded muscles that she could see through the cream-colored Henley and dark brown sweats he was wearing.
“You have Moscato? I somehow didn’t picture that as your drink of choice.”
He chuckled, and his entire face lit up like the sun against a windowpane at dawn.
“It’s not. Mike told me you favored it. It’s too sweet for my taste.”
“That’s the point. It’s like juice with a buzz.” She didn’t miss the part where he was asking their mutual friend what she liked either. To keep from making the moment weird, she buried that little bit of information in the back of her mind. “I’ll have a glass with dinner. Water will work for now.”
He gave her a brief nod before disappearing into the kitchen. It allowed her a moment to collect her good sense. Giving herself a mental shake, she pulled her iPad Mini out of her purse and queued up her notes.
“So, have you come up with any ideas for how we can save the arts program?”
He breezed back into the room, handing her a tall glass of iced water, and she had to focus on keeping a secure grip on the cold slick surface once his fingers touched hers.
She expected that he would move to the sofa opposite her once she had her drink in hand.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you looked at it, he sat down next to her, pushing her boundaries even further.
It was easy to pretend this was strictly a business meeting when he wasn’t right next to her, close enough for her to smell the cool scent of his cologne mixing in with the seasoning and spices of their food.
Captivated by his presence, she was lost in the sharp lines of his face and the crisp taper of the fade at his temple, in the way his neatly trimmed goatee framed his lips. It was only his expectant expression that clued her in he was expecting her to respond to his prompt.
“You … you know how well the fall festival does for bringing in scholarship donations, right?”
He took a sip of his beer from the longneck bottle in his hand and she had to force herself to look at her notes and not him. In his natural habitat without the restraint of his office, Adam was just too tempting. If she wanted to keep things strictly business, she had to remember why she was here.
The kids, I’m here for the kids, my kid in particular. Right?
“Yeah. Especially this year with Vanessa’s two-million-dollar bid. Your girl sure knows how to do things big.”
“That and she has a really big heart.”
He took another swig of his beer before continuing. “Michael’s a lucky man to find someone who loves so easily.”
His words pulled her eyes to him, and she looked beyond the smooth tan skin and gorgeous locs, attempting to find something deeper.
“You say that as if you’re envious.”
“That’s because I am.”
Whatever she’d been expecting by way of an answer, that hadn’t been it. The Adam she knew was a loud showman who never let anyone see him lacking.
“In the market for forever, Adam?”
He placed his beer gently on the coffee table in front of them and turned to fix his attention on her.
“At the moment, I know I’m not intentionally looking for forever,” he responded in that deep, rich tone she was fast becoming addicted to. “But I don’t think I’d run from it if it found me.”
She couldn’t understand why this information made her insides tremble. Somehow knowing he was on the market for something more than fun made her heart thud against her rib cage.
“Have you ever been in a committed relationship or is this just you thinking in the hypothetical?”
He leaned back into the sofa cushion, putting what she knew to be a firm chest on display.
“You know I was married for a few years.”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you were committed to the relationship.”
She waited patiently for an answer as she watched his eyes lift to hers.
“While my ex and I were together, I was completely committed. It wasn’t enough to save my marriage, though.
I told you, we married for the wrong reasons to begin with.
No level of commitment would’ve saved us.
” He took another drink from his beer. She half expected him to fiddle with it to shy away from her and the topic.
To her surprise, he didn’t. Soon, he was staring right back at her as he continued.
Adam adjusted himself on the couch by turning and putting his knee on the cushion.
This angle meant he was looking directly at her now.
“I’ve done a lot of work on myself since my divorce,” he stated plainly.
“Although I’m in a good place emotionally, now because of work, the timing isn’t exactly optimal for me to get involved.
But if the right person came along, I imagine I wouldn’t be afraid to put the effort forward. What about you?”
“I’m not sure forever exists for me.” She waited for him to say something slick or flippant.
Instead, he leaned in, bringing his rapt attention to her.
“I was married for nearly sixteen years. Ending it wasn’t something I ever thought I’d have to do until I was actually doing it.
James’ well-being came first. It still does. ”
“As it should,” he quietly stated, as if he were mulling her answer over in his head. “James is very lucky to have a mother like you, someone so dedicated to him.”
The thought of her boy brought an automatic smile to her face. She’d sacrificed so much for his happiness, and she didn’t regret one single thing she’d done to make sure he’d had what he needed.