Chapter 15 Bricks
brICKS
Anonymous-
I hold my breath while I watch the glass rain down over them, a scream tearing from her throat.
He shields her with his antlers and trembling restraint. How fucking noble.
This should have shattered whatever spell he had over her. Instead, she clings to him like he’s her salvation.
Eyes wild, lips swollen, chest heaving like she’s about to beg him to come back to bed–bed– where he had her. I saw it through my fucking screen.
That should’ve been me.
She was supposed to be shaking from fear, not desire. She was supposed to see him for what he is:
A beast.
A monster.
A fucking weapon wrapped in white fur and lies.
But she kissed him instead. Moaned for him. I watched as he dragged his hand between her thighs like his dirty claws deserved to touch her skin.
I had to intervene. I had to save her. I’m the one who pulled her from the ice when the world forgot who she was. I’m the one who bandaged her wounds and made sure she was safe in bed.
I can’t stop seeing it.
The way her legs fell open for him. The sound of her whispering his name. The way he looked at her like she was the only thing keeping him anchored to this world.
It’s supposed to be me.
She was mine the moment I saw her. I marked her... studied her. I loved her before he even knew she existed.
I carried her through the snow, blood in her hair, lips blue from the cold. I was the one who kissed her temple and told her she was safe.
And then he crawled out of the woods like a fucking disease.
His hands on her thighs. Her body arching into him. His mouth almost on her—
No, no, no.
She was supposed to scream for me—beg for me.
She would’ve let him fuck her. Right there, in front of me.
And now the image of her lips parted, eyes half-lidded, hands braced on those disgusting antlers—I can’t get it out of my head. It’s burned there, etched into my skull for eternity.
She’s tainted now. Marked by his scent, his bond, his fucking filthy claws.
But I’ll scrub him out. I’ll tear the bond out of her with my bare hands if I have to.
I wonder what sound she’d make if I sank my teeth into her neck instead. I bet she’d taste like surrender, like honey dripping down my throat. And I wouldn’t stop—wouldn’t hold back like he does, not until every part of her remembers who she belongs to.
My fists clench as blood rushes behind my eyes. The screen in front of me flickers from being squeezed so hard.
I’ll erase him from her skin. I can fix this. I will fix this.
If she won’t run from the monster in her bed… maybe she’ll kneel for the one on her rooftop.
One of us is going to break, little dove.
And I promise you, it won’t be me.
Lumi-
The crash is still echoing through my mind.
I don’t know if I screamed or if the sound was ripped from me.
Andrik is completely shielding me with his body.
He doesn’t say anything. He stays suspended over me perfectly still with one hand braced beside my head, the other clenched so tightly, I can hear something straining under his skin.
His chest rises and falls in ragged bursts, and all I can think is—don’t leave me.
My pulse won’t settle, and I can’t stop my hands from shaking. Cold rushes in from the broken window, but it’s the way his lip curls—baring his teeth in fury—that has me shaking.
The air feels heavier, but I still want him.
My thighs ache from the way they were open for him. I’m still tingling along the frost-laced trails his tongue left shimmering across my skin. His low, raspy voice plays over and over again in my mind.
I can still feel the ghost of his touch, burning me from the inside out.
What the hell is wrong with me? A brick just came through the fucking window.
Someone was out there. Someone could still be out there.
.. and all I can think about is the way his voice cracked when he said my name.
The way his claws pulled back the moment I said I trust you.
“Lumi,” his voice crackles. I flinch when the sound snaps me from my thoughts. He notices, and his jaw clenches. Sadness flickers across his face before he buries it beneath his usual carefulness.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, though I don’t know what I’m apologizing for.
His head bows, and he slowly eases back from me, his antlers casting shadows over both of us.
“You shouldn’t have to be afraid of me,” he says softly.
Does he think I was apologizing because he was scaring me?
“You didn’t scare me, Andri.” And I’ve never meant anything more, even with glass everywhere and a threat just outside, I’m not scared. I know he’d lay his life down for mine without hesitation.
He lifts his gaze slowly, eyes like stormy seas, his hand reaches for my shoulder—but falls short before he pulls it back toward himself.
“Are you hurt?” he asks, voice hoarse.
If you count being upset that a minute ago you couldn’t keep your hands off me, and now you look scared to touch me, then yes. I’m hurt.
“No.”
His hand lands gently on my arm, thumb brushing a sliver of glass from my sleeve.
“I don’t understand how this happened,” he murmurs.
“I wonder if it was the person from the forest—the one who brought me here.”
“No, that’s not what I mean, Lumi. I warded your bed. Nothing should have been able to penetrate through my Kael’shar?n.”
“What’s a Kael’shar?n?”
“It’s an ancient act of protection. My antlers carry many things—breath, memory, magic. But they were never meant to stay whole.”
He gets off the bed and reaches beneath my headboard, grabbing a shard of bone.
I look up at his antlers and notice a few sections that are broken and bloody.
“You broke them off... to protect me? Won’t you run out of antlers if you keep doing that?”
“No. They are vair’haelin.” He opens my palm and lays it inside. “My body will make more. For you. Velorin ael’vair?n.” He smiles faintly, “The only ones that won’t grow back are the ones I break for war.”
I close my eyes, just for a moment, but I don't let go of his antler. My body is burning. Everything inside me feels too loud. I know how messed up this is, how wrong it is for me to want him like this after what happened—but I can’t stop my thoughts from racing back to everything that he was doing to me before the window exploded.
The heat between us hasn’t faded. It’s worse now. Sharper. My skin feels too tight, and my lungs can’t draw in enough air. I feel like I’m drowning in a sea full of flames.
I don’t know whether to cry or crawl into his arms and beg him not to let go.
“Andrik,” I whisper.
He doesn’t answer. He’s too busy staring at the window.
“I’m okay,” I say, softer now. “You were right there. You protected me.” That gets him. He finally meets my eyes.
“You’re not okay,” he says, voice frayed. “That was meant for you, Lumi. They could have killed you.”
“But they didn’t.”
“And what if I hadn’t gotten there in time?” his voice comes out panicked.
“I think you’ll always get there in time, Andrik.”
He stares at me for a long time. His hands curl and uncurl at his sides. His nostrils flare as his gaze drops to my lips. The heat inside me flares higher. I ache for something I can’t even explain.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask.
“Because the bond is screaming,” His gaze falls over my body, “and you smell like need, Lumi. You’re practically glowing with it.”
My heart slams in my chest. My thighs press together instinctively,
“I can’t think straight when you’re like this,” he growls. “And I definitely can’t touch you again, not unless you want to be bonded to me forever.”
Do I? Do I want to be bonded to an ancient snow beast that I don’t even know?
Kinda.
That should terrify me, but it doesn’t. Something inside me is screaming to let him in, and maybe that's just my vagina, but there are so many snowy pheromones in this room I can barely think straight.
“It’s the bond,” I whisper. “Right? That’s all this is?” He doesn’t answer. Which means it’s not.
His silence drips with tension. “Okay,” I say, because I’ve officially lost my mind. “Maybe the idea of being bonded to you isn’t so bad.”
His eyes snap to mine.
Shit. Maybe this extremely tense, emotionally charged moment wasn’t the time to say that out loud.
“I mean—maybe not right now. You don’t have to like...put a ring on it or whatever the mating equivalent is. I’m just saying—”
“Lumi,” his voice is strained. “Stop talking.”
“Why?”
“Because if you keep saying things like that, I’ll drop to my knees and beg you to mean them.”
My brain melts at the thought of this nine-foot beast dropping to his knees for me.
I am not okay. I don't know if I’ll ever be okay again. Whatever this is between us keeps pulling tighter with every heartbeat.
He makes a point to back away from me slowly.
“I didn’t mean—” I start, but the words catch in my throat. “I was just trying to lighten the mood.”
He lets out a low, broken sound that isn’t quite a laugh. “Do you think it helped?” He doesn’t look remotely enthused—story of my life.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Stop apologizing for wanting me. You’re supposed to feel like this. I am your mate.”
“I’m not just—” I hesitate. My heart is thudding so loud I wonder if he can hear it. “It’s not just the bond. Is it?”
He swallows hard, fangs glinting behind his parted lips. His voice is barely more than a whisper when he answers. ”The bond only amplifies what you already feel. It doesn’t lie. “
I take a step toward him, and his eyes squeeze shut. “Don’t.”
“But I—”
“Don’t.” His voice rips through the air like thunder. When his eyes open again, they’re glowing—his fangs longer. Wilder.
“If you take another step, I’ll lose what little restraint I have left. And once I give in, Lumi—I won’t be able to stop.” He pauses. “Not until the bond is consummated and you're mine in every way the forest recognizes.”
Maybe it says something about my sanity—because that sounds pretty damn good right now.
“So don’t take another step,” he breathes, “unless you’re ready to be claimed.”
My whole body pulses, but I don’t budge. Instead, I nod once.
He bows his head, “I’m sorry for raising my voice. Thank you for not running.” His breath shudders. “The bond is usually completed immediately for my kind. It’s been days since I first scented you.” His voice cracks. “But I’m trying, Sael?n. I swear to you—I’m trying.”
He makes no move to touch me, but his lips part just enough to whisper something in that ancient language he always talks in.
“Sael?n’nai ves kai’mor?n.” (I’m already inside you. Buried in the parts you haven't named yet.)