Chapter 26 – Lumen
Chapter Twenty-Six
Lumen
The greenroom is packed with people, and Kincaid and Malcolm haven’t even made it back from handing off their stage clothes.
Parish is next to me on the couch, cutting up lines. Tennyson stands by Rhys and Wren.
Riser leans against the wall by them. His dark curls are still wet from his post-show shower, and he’s wearing a Liminal long-sleeve T-shirt.
He looks damn good with the way it stretches over his slender frame.
It’s rather short, so when he moves just right, it shows a few inches of his dark olive skin and multitude of tattoos.
He catches me staring and winks.
I smile back.
I haven’t had the chance to spend much time with him today, but I want to.
Tennyson laughs, slapping hands with Rhys. Wren rolls her eyes, glancing away, like she can’t stand to be in Ten’s presence. That should make for an interesting dynamic once we’re back on the bus.
Parish bumps his shoulder against mine, nodding to the table. “I cut fresh straws. Pick your weapon.”
I laugh, grabbing the closest one and doing the line on the edge.
I’m probably going to owe them a ton of money before I leave.
Drugs aren’t cheap.
When I was bartending, I ended up accidentally dealing to find a way to offset the cost of all the weed Theo was smoking.
My coworkers were well-connected, and one introduced me to her dealer.
It started out small.
I’d get weed or whatever else for me and Theo. Then I was buying enough to get what the band needed. It was convenient, since what they bought ended up covering what we were using, plus a little extra spending money.
Among our friends, we always had a network where if someone found something they would offer to grab it for everyone, and vice versa. Only, when they’d reach out to ask if I knew where they could find something, I’d already have it.
It was relatively harmless.
It wasn’t like I was selling to strangers.
I was just the middleman for people I knew, and it really helped make ends meet.
It took me a while to realize that’s probably how all dealers get started, which scared me.
So I stopped.
Luckily, Theo’s band was scouted not too long after. We needed that break because the money I had been squirreling away was almost completely gone.
“Can I tell you a secret?” Parish asks as I settle back on the couch cushion.
I don’t want to know anyone’s secrets.
I’m already screwed up enough.
“No,” I say, laughing to offset the sting.
At the same time, he blurts out, “I really like that chick.”
“Wren?” I whisper, trying to be covert.
“That’s the one,” he agrees.
“It seems like she and Tennyson don’t get along very well…”
“Not at all.”
“Shit.”
“Exactly.”
“What are you going to do?” I ask, swiping my Dr Pepper off the floor.
He chuckles, shoving his long hair back from his face. “I’m going to pray they hate fuck, and it ends up being really good sex.”
Well, at least he has a plan.
Hopefully it works.
Otherwise, the bus is going to be a whole different experience once we’re back on it.
“I love your dress,” Wren says, coming to stand by my side as I linger around, watching the insanity that is the meet and greet. “I know we kinda met last night, but I’m Wrenley. Everyone calls me Wren.” She holds out a hand with bright pink- and lime-painted nails.
“Lumen.” I shake. “Your nails are so pretty.”
“Thanks.” She holds them up, examining them. “I got them done today, along with my toes, to give my brother time to remind Ten that he owes him one. Technically he owes us one, but whatever.”
“The nail tech did a great job.” I take a sip of my soda. “How do you feel about traveling with the band?”
“It’s whatever,” she says, shrugging. “I wasn’t exactly pleased to hear Rhys was pawning me off on Ten, but I’ve known him for years. Also, the tour has lots of security, so that’s good.”
My head tilts. “Are you in danger?”
“My brother owes someone money.” Her teeth dig into her lower lip as her shoulders once again bounce. “The guy made some threats, but I’m not too worried. Rhys is freaking out, though.”
Yeah, I probably would be too.
“Anyway, he wants me out of town for a bit, hence how you all got stuck with me.” Her brother waves her over, and Wren turns to me. “It was nice to meet you.”
“You too,” I say, blinking at her back as she walks away. I don’t even have the chance to correct her. I’m not part of the band or with any of the guys in any type of committed sense.
Okay.
If nothing else, it’s nice to have a reminder that my problems aren’t insurmountable in comparison to what some other people are going through.
Benji warned us before even leaving the meet and greet that there’s a thick wall of paparazzi that we’ll have to pass by on the way to the SUVs. We’ll apparently be split into two vehicles since there are so many of us heading back to the hotel.
“Don’t stress, baby doll.” Malcolm tosses his arm around my shoulder as we head out of the building. “They’re totally going to be focused on who Wren is.”
“I think I’m getting the hang of it,” I say, snuggling into his chest. “If I tuck my jaw, they barely get pictures of my double chin.”
We come to a stop by the doors, and Malcolm turns to me.
“Double chin, my ass. You’re sexy as fuck, Lulu.” He kisses my temple. “I really love seeing the pictures of us plastered everywhere. It gives me something to jack off to when you’re not around.”
“Jesus Christ,” Riser says. “You need therapy.”
“Probably.” Malcolm laughs, and those dual nose rings of his glint in the low light.
Kasey slides back inside one of the doors, waving. “We’re good to move.”
Kincaid heads out first as Kasey holds the door. Malcolm drags me along, and it gets incredibly loud as we step out into the cool night air.
“It’s the woman from the pit.”
“Mal, look at me. Over here. Are the two of you dating?”
“What’s your name, sweetheart?”
“Come on, honey. Give us something. We can make you famous.”
Riser slides up on my other side, wrapping his hand in mine. “It’s okay. We’re right here.” He offers a dazzling smile, and my heart thumps erratically.
I’ve never met anyone as in tune to my moods as he is, and I adore how safe and seen it makes me feel.
Tennyson and his friends, along with some people they must have invited back to the hotel from the after-party, take over the living room area of the suite.
Mine and Theo’s apartment was a bit of a hangout spot for everyone, and I’m no stranger to parties or chaos, but I’m also exhausted. I truly have no idea how these guys do nine-month long tours.
Kincaid, Malcolm, Riser, and I end up out on the balcony as Mal rolls a blunt.
It’s cooled off a bit, which hopefully means winter is on the way.
Although, I will likely need to do some shopping.
I only packed two pairs of leggings and a single pair of jeans.
Unlike Liminal, who has a huge bus that stores their extra wardrobe items, Tangled Desires was told not to overpack.
The fact Theo and I had to split his drawer space didn’t help.
Have they noticed how much I’m re-wearing clothing items? If they haven’t, they will within a week or two.
If I get a payout from the label, I could afford to spend a few hundred dollars on clothes, but that would be wasteful in the long run. The stuff I wear here is nothing like my day-to-day clothes back home.
I squint as Kincaid holds his phone out, trying to hand it to me. If he said something, I missed it while I was lost in my head.
“What’s this?” I ask, taking the phone.
At first, I worry it might be a news article about me. Only, when I get a clear view of the screen, it’s some type of paperwork.
“That would be our lab work,” Kincaid says.
“They test us for STIs before every tour, likely to ensure we aren’t spreading—” Malcolm cuts off when Kincaid leans over, smacking him in the arm. He’s just in the process of rolling the blunt, and pieces of weed go flying. “Jesus, dude. Sorry. I’ll shut up.”
“Yeah, do that.” Kincaid sighs, shaking his head. “We thought you might like to see the paperwork. Everything was negative. I compiled them into one PDF. You can scroll through.”
“Okay,” I say, mindlessly flicking through the pages. The columns are easy to understand, and everything seems to be negative. “These were taken before the tour? What about since?”
“We had Randy during the entire first month of the tour,” Mal says. “His entire job was to report our every move back to the label admins.”
“We agreed before we left that we wouldn’t hook up or do anything else that might risk the label pulling the plug on the tour,” Riser chimes in.
I almost wish they would be less diplomatic and just say it. “So, you haven’t hooked up with anyone since you were tested?” I need to make sure I’m following what they’re saying without any confusion.
“Correct,” Kincaid says.
“Well, we kinda fooled around last night, but I haven’t had sex with anyone since before those were taken,” Malcolm says, licking the cigar to stick it together.
“The same goes for me,” Riser says. “I haven’t been with anyone in almost a year, except for what we did last night.”
My face burns.
We absolutely did have sexual contact last night.
“I don’t have recent test results.” I shove Kincaid’s phone back at him. “The only person I’ve been with for over a year was Theo. Before that, when I was tested, everything was good, but I have no idea if he cheated on me before that woman. He said he didn’t—”
“We’re adults,” Riser says, reaching over and resting his hand on my thigh. “All sex comes with risks.”
“There’s not much a good round of antibiotics can’t cure nowadays.” Malcolm lights the blunt, shrugging. “I mean, there are a couple you really want to stay away from, but—”
“Yeah, you would know,” Kincaid says, kicking Malcolm’s foot.
“You’re such a dick.” Malcolm passes the blunt to Riser, rolling his eyes. “I was going to say, kids are a big threat when fucking.”
“I have a hormonal birth control implant,” I blurt out, twisting my arm to show them the underside. “I got it less than a year ago. It should be good for two more years.”
My cheeks feel like they’re on fire, and I wish I could be more of a grown-up about discussing sex.
I’m not shy when my clothes are off. I’m all about enjoying sex and not being ashamed about it. But sitting here, talking about the possibility of having sex with three rock stars that I was acutely aware of before ever meeting them, is an entirely different story.
Hell, if I had sex with all three of them, I’d be close to doubling my lifetime body count. I’m not too fussed about that number, but they’re also ridiculously out of my league.
“That is good to know.” Mal winks, licking his lips.
“You know, the tour has a nurse practitioner that travels with us,” Kincaid says conversationally. “We could all do a round of testing. It might not be a bad idea.”
“I wouldn’t mind,” Mal says.
“I’m down,” Riser chimes in.
I nod because speaking feels like a lot of work.
Riser leans over, offering me the blunt.
I take it, passing it off to Kincaid.
Smoking could calm me down, or it could make me unbearably paranoid. There’s no in between for me when it comes to weed.
“You don’t smoke?” Malcolm asks.
“Very occasionally, but probably not anytime soon.” I shrug. “I’ll take a gummy every once in a while. I just don’t like to be high out in public. I get too paranoid. I prefer to stick at home and chill.”
“Understandable.” Kincaid blows a huge cloud of smoke out of his nose.
Riser leans his arm on my chair and gets close to my ear. “Hey, wanna take a walk with me?”
I turn toward him, which puts our mouths dangerously close together.
I nod. “Yeah, I’d love to.”