Chapter 38
Gabriella
The smell of pine and fresh water envelops my senses as I step out of the truck. The air feels bright and clean entering my lungs, and a feeling of tranquility falls over me. I think that Emma and Ty were right; this is exactly what we needed.
When I walk into the cabin, I’m greeted with the warm smell of vanilla and a cozy feeling of home.
Whoever decorated this place wanted to make anyone who entered feel welcome.
The front door opens into a great room with cathedral ceilings.
Well, I guess there is no ceiling per se, it’s a log cabin, a really fucking nice log cabin, so the roof is the ceiling.
There’s an open floor plan, and the rooms seem to be separated by rugs placed on the polished wood floors.
The entire house is made of actual logs, which makes the interior darker, but the giant windows bring in so much light that the contrast is just breathtaking.
“Ems, you take G out back and show her around, Vic and I will take the bags upstairs to the bedrooms.” Ty gives Emma a swat on her ass as he and Vic pass us with our bags in hand. Emma swings her arm playfully at Ty, but he’s already gone before she can reach him.
Rolling her eyes, Emma links her arm through mine and guides me out the glass French Doors onto the back patio.
My breath catches in my throat at the view.
The surface of the massive lake looks like tempered glass, surrounded by towering pines and oak trees.
I can hear a symphony of birds singing and chirping with a background of smaller creatures scurrying in the brush.
With all my senses high on nature’s Xanax, something settles deep in my chest, and that feeling of tranquility from earlier increases tenfold. It’s absolutely magical.
Vic and Ty spend time making dinner while Emma and I help ourselves to a glass of wine on the deck overlooking the lake. It really is so beautiful, I think this trip may need to become an annual thing, maybe extending to a week or two.
Emma clears her throat, gaining my attention from gazing out at the picturesque view. “So, Gabbi.” She starts, my eyebrows going up at her tone. “You read the books I gave you?” I cough a little after taking a large sip of wine, nervous about where the conversation is going.
“Yes?” I take another small sip.
“Did you like any of them?” She asks with a quirk of her mouth.
“Yes. All of them.” I blush a little at my admission.
“Did you get any ideas of somethings you would like to try or even things that you didn’t like?” Emma probes.
I take a minute to think and then another minute to get up the guts to answer truthfully.
“Well, when Vic and I were younger, we definitely experimented a lot more, and we actually did some of the things that were in some of those books, but I don’t really think we knew what we were doing.
Let’s just say there are definitely some red, yellow, and really fucking green things that I read in those books. ”
Emma bursts into a fit of giggles, and a flush washes over me for an instant, then I follow with giggles of my own.
Fuck it. After they told us their story, I have nothing to hide from her or Ty.
I’m in this one hundred percent, my mind flashing back to what Emma said on the ride here: you guys have to want this.
You have to want to want to get uncomfortable.
You have to be in it one hundred percent.
Emma composes herself with a giggle slipping out here and there.
“Well, girl, what if I told you that you would have a chance to experiment with some of those things in a safe space?” I just lost my eyebrows in my hairline.
“Just think about it.” What does that even mean?
Thankfully, Ty and Vic bring dinner out at that moment, leaving me to my thoughts and no need to respond.
I didn’t realize how hungry I was until Vic just put the plate in front of me. Filet Mignon, grilled asparagus, and rosemary garlic mashed potatoes. Hell yes!
A moan seeps out of my throat when I take a bite of the steak the men grilled for us.
“Oh my god, Vic, this tastes so good.” I continue making little humming noises as I chew while wiggling my hips in the chair.
Vic used to say that was my food dance and told the kids not to make fun of it because, when mommy wiggles like that when she’s eating, those are the demons leaving her body.
Once I swallow, I open my eyes. Hmm, didn’t realize I had closed them. Looking around, I can see that not only Vic, but Emma and Ty have all paused with their forks halfway to their mouths.
“Jesus, Vic, if that’s what she sounds like during eating, I’m not sure how you make it past three minutes in the bedroom,” Ty says with his eyes wide.
My face feels hot as I look at Emma, but all she does is smile at me and respond to Ty.
“Baby, you took the words right out of my mouth.” What the actual fuck?
“Girl, you are sexy AF, and the noises you make when you eat are equivalent to those that most people only wish they heard in the bedroom. Everyone at this table is a little hot right now, thanks to your enjoyment of food consumption. Nothing to be embarrassed about.”
I can feel the flush across my face. Registering what Emma just said, I finally look over at Vic, and all I see is heat burning in his icy blues.
“Alright. Are we ready?” Ty asks Vic and me with enthusiasm.
Vic and I just stand there looking at each other.
After dinner, Ty and Emma told Vic and me to go to separate parts of the house to write two letters.
The first letter was to describe ourselves as if we were introducing ourselves to a stranger.
The second letter, also addressed to a stranger, was meant to share our perspective on our partner.
So, my first letter contains my own reflections about myself, and my second letter expresses my thoughts about Vic.
Both Emma and Ty told us to be completely honest. I hope to god that this is just an exercise in purging the words from our brains, and not have to actually share with each other.
Now here Vic and I stand, brushing shoulders, facing Emma and Ty in the middle of the cabin’s great room.
Ty started a fire in the giant stone fireplace about 20 feet behind me, and there’s a roomy, dark brown leather sectional directly behind where Ty and Emma are standing.
The couch is accompanied by a coffee table and a couple of end tables that look to have been intricately carved out of tree trunks.
It’s incredible how someone has the skills to do that.
I don’t respond to Ty’s question; instead, I just watch my toes scrunching into the colorful, plush area rug lying beneath us. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Ty moves to pull two dining room chairs into the middle of the living room after moving the coffee table.
Placing the cushioned dining room chairs facing each other, Ty motions for Vic and me to sit. He has us sitting so close that one of my knees sits in between Vic’s thighs and vice versa. “Perfect!” Emma states.
My stomach starts doing flips at how close Vic and I are sitting. Please, please, please do not ask me to do what I think they are going to ask. I think I might throw up. I knew I shouldn’t have written my letters with complete honesty. Fuck, I can feel the panic starting to set in.
“Hey. Hey, G?” I feel hands on my face as my vision starts to blur.
“Baby, look at me.” I see a set of worried eyes going in and out of focus.
Vic? “Breathe with me, Gabbi. In one, two, three, out, one, two, three, four, five, six.” I start following Vic’s voice and his breathing.
After a couple of minutes, my heart stops racing and my vision clears.
My eyes focus on his beautiful blues. His eyebrows are scrunched together, and his eyes are filled with worry.
“There she is.” I hear Emma say from the side. I look over and see her kneeling next to my leg and realize she is rubbing my back. “Hey, girl. You okay?”
Once I regain my composure, I nod my head. “Thank you.” I look at Vic, then at Emma. Vic drops his hands from my face, immediately drawing one hand back and rubbing the back of his neck.
“Hey, G?” Ty looks down at me. When I look up, I see his playful demeanor is gone. In its place is concern and reluctance. “Can you tell us what that was about?”
Looking down at my hands, I debate my level of honesty here. It’s Vic’s look of hope that decides for me. “I…I…um, I figured you were going to have us read the letters to each other and I’m just…” I stop, tears welling in my eyes. What the fuck is wrong with me? Why can’t I do this?
Vic reaches out and takes one of my hands, breaking up the wringing I’m doing.
“Scared?” All I can do is nod. “Me too, G. I’m fucking terrified.
We have just kept our shit to ourselves for so long, it’s really hard to imagine just sharing all of my thoughts.
Let’s just say for this exercise, my color is definitely yellow.
” He lifts one side of his mouth, attempting a reassuring smirk, but I can see the worry.
Emma grabs our hands that are joined, still kneeling next to us.
“This is all about your all’s comfort level.
We know this is uncomfortable, which is why we told you our story on the way here.
We were hoping to provide some encouragement, showing you both that we came out better on the other side.
We can proceed slowly; if either of you wishes to stop, you know the word to say.
” She patiently waits for a response, no pressure, no judgment, and I love her and Ty even more for this moment.
After what feels like forever, I finally find my voice. “I want to go first.” Vic’s look of surprise flashes quickly, then fades into admiration, pride maybe? Then he nods.
“Okay, good, Gabbi. Thank you for volunteering. We would like you to read your letter about yourself first, and then Vic will read his letter about you. Then vice versa.” Vic and I both nod, accepting the knowledge that things are about to take a major turn. I can only hope it’s a good one.