Chapter 63
Victor
There are circular high-top tables with stools, a large U-shaped bar with glasses hanging from racks above the bar top, and a small stage in the corner. Every piece of furniture is made of this dark, heavy wood. It reminds me of the old-time pubs shown in Renaissance movies.
Bobby retired from service, took over his dad’s bar, and has lived the simple life of a bar owner ever since.
He’s gotten us out of more trouble than I can count, both when we were in the service and out.
This bar has been a home base for us since we were first stationed here a little over ten years ago.
“Hey, Kid,” Bobby’s dark blue eyes hit me with a look of pity right before he wraps me in a solid hug, asking the question I’m preparing to hear about a million times today. “How ya holdin’ up?” He pulls away and pats my shoulder.
My stomach rolls with the responsibility I have to deal with in the upcoming hours.
“I’m not sure man.” Running my hand through my hair causes me to realize I’m still in my dress uniform.
“Hey, do me a favor, I gotta go change and I need…a minute, can you keep everyone out of the back room for a bit?”
“Sure, Kid, whatever you need.” With a nod of his head, I grab my duffel off the ground and head to the back. I need to go through the letter one last time before I do this.
Cookie’s celebration of life is well underway by the time I come out to the main area of the bar.
There must be at least a hundred people here, with more coming through the door.
I scan the room to clock where everyone is, seeing Bobby and his wife behind the bar, some of our old officers are crowded near the sidebar, while their wives sit over in a corner booth.
Cookie and Sheila’s daughters, Cookie’s parents, and his sister are sitting in another booth in the back.
Scanning back across the other side of the bar, I meet eyes with the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, who happens to be my wife.
My heart races with the turmoil all of this has kicked up.
Cookie’s letter did something to me, and I’m not sure if I can undo it.
Staring at her and knowing what I might have to do physically pains me.
I can’t think about it now, or I won’t be able to go through with this.
Watching Gabbi walk toward me both heats my blood and sends chills down my entire body. She’s my home, she has been since she became mine freshman year of high school, and now, to keep her safe, I think I might have to leave my home.
“Hey Vic, you doin’ okay?” Her hands are on my skin, cupping both sides of my face.
“Yeah, baby.” I can’t seem to make eye contact with her. The look of worry on her face is what makes me grab hold of her and bring her to my chest. “Will you do me a favor, Rockstar?” I mumble while kissing her hair.
“Anything.” She whispers, squeezing her arms around my waist.
“Will you stand by me while I do this?” I may have to let her go soon, but I can’t do this part without her.
“Of course.” Gabbi tucks herself into my side under one arm, so we can look out at the crowd that came here to say goodbye to Cookie.
With another breath of courage, I tighten my grip around Gabbi’s shoulders and raise my voice above the crowd.
“Excuse me! Can I get everyone’s attention, please?
” The chatter starts to dissipate, but not fully.
I make eye contact with Ty, and he nods once, then puts his fingers to his lips and lets out an attention-grabbing wolf whistle.
At that, silence blankets the bar and all eyes fall on me.
“Hello, everyone. First, I’d like to thank you all for coming to celebrate the life of a man many of us call brother.
” I swallow the lump climbing in my throat.
“Cookie was a one-of-a-kind soul with a heart of gold. He loved hard and lived life with as many laughs as possible.” Sniffles echo in different parts of the room, and a quick glance at faces exposes the tears being shed.
“Cookie left me a letter.” I see D finally glance at me over his shoulder.
He’s been sitting at the bar since I came from the back room, keeping his back to the lot of us.
From the looks of the upside-down shot glasses in front of him, I’d say D is well on his way to finding the bottom of the bottle.
“The letter he left me was for all of you.” That got D’s attention; he’s now turned around, leaning back, elbows resting against the bar, and a drink, probably a Jack and Coke, dangling from his fingertips.
I didn’t lie, Cookie did leave a letter for me to read during his celebration.
He also wrote a letter for D. I found the letter marked for D the night Sheila gave me the envelope, but I haven’t had a chance to speak with him.
He disappeared after that night, and the first time I saw him was this morning.
I plan to give it to him as soon as I’m done here.
“Cookie always had his own way of speaking, so rather than attempt to paraphrase, I’m going to just let my brother’s lyrical magic speak for itself.” I lick my lips and clear my throat before I begin. Then I read Cookie’s last words.
“Hello all. Strike that. Good evening.”
“God, I sound like a tool. Fuck it. So. Here it is. My celebration of life. You’re here to say goodbye to me, but really, you’re all here to support each other and my beautiful wife and daughters.
I wrote this and gave it to my brother to read because I knew he was the only one who wouldn’t paraphrase my bullshit.
” A small chuckle echoes around the bar.
“I’m not gonna make Kid drag this on, I just had a few things to say and needed you all to hear them.
Maybe they can help you with your own shit.
One last caveat, if Kid doesn’t mention your name, don’t take it personally, just know that I know who’s here and I love you for being here for my family when I couldn’t be. ”
“Anyway, let’s get on with this shit, so you all can talk about how amazing I was (Kid, pause for laughter).
First in the shoot, my kids, Antonia, and Alana, I love you both so much, baby girls.
You are my world, and I’m so sorry I couldn’t be better for you.
Be good to your mama. She loves you with every breath in her body.
I’m in your heart and will always be watching over you.
If you need anything, you bug the shit out of Uncle D.
He’s got you babies. I programmed his number in both of your cell phones.
D, don’t roll your fucking eyes, you take care of my girls.
” I pause to look at D in time to see him take another shot and turn his back to me.
“Mom and Dad, you did your best with me. Thank you for loving me and being there for my family. Camilla, take care of mom and dad. Call them more. They miss your traveling, nomad-ass. Keep following your heart, baby sister, and know that I love you. Sheila…fuck…Sheils…I don’t know what to say to you except I’m so fucking sorry, baby.
I have so much to say to you. I left you something in my nightstand.
I just hope one day you can forgive me.” I look over at Sheila and see her sink her head into her hands, and her shoulders start shaking, causing Alana and Antonia to wrap their arms around her.
Damnit, Cookie, look what you’ve done to your family, you fuck.
“Finally, to my team. Kid, Big Dawg, Diablo, Wolf, you are and forever will be my brothers. Thank you for keeping me safe in the shit and bringing me back home to my family. Take care of yourselves and your mental health. You owe it to your women and your kids to be the best version of you, and if you can’t do it yourself, then you fucking find a way, even though I couldn’t.
I’ll see you again motherfuckers…til Valhallah”
Just as I finish, a door slamming causes everyone to look to the front of the bar. When no one’s there to greet us, I realize the noise was from someone leaving. My heart drops, and a sweat breaks out when I realize the stool D was sitting at is empty. He’s gone. Fuck!
A few hours later, everyone has dissipated, and the only ones left in the bar are me, Gabbi, Ty, Emma, Sabrina, Wolf, and Sheila. We’ve been sitting here for the last hour telling ridiculous stories about Cookie and his shenanigans.
“Oh, oh, I have my favorite one!” Ty raises his finger to interrupt our laughter. “Did you all ever hear about how Cookie got Sheils to date him?”
“Oh, Ty, no, please, this is a stupid story.” Sheila takes another sip of her drink. She seems like she’s feeling pretty relaxed, likely due to her three glasses of wine, but no one in their right mind is going to stop her.
“A stupid story it may be, but probably still my favorite Cookie memory.” Ty waggles his eyebrows with a matching grin.
“I want to hear it.” Sabrina and Emma say in unison. Gabbi knows this story, since she was around before the rest of them.
“So no shit, there we were.” Ty begins, “Kid, me, Cook, Wolf, and Gabbi. We went out to eat at Gustufson’s Steakhouse on a random Friday night.
Cookie came out of the bathroom, talking shit to me about how much bigger and more satisfying his dick was for a woman, not paying any attention to where he was going, and straight up ran this beautiful woman over. ” Sheila snickers at the memory.
“So, Cook picks this beautiful woman up off the floor and just stares at her like an idiot. Then, when he finally gets his head out of his ass, he says, I’m so sorry, miss, I didn’t see you there, I was…
Then Sheil interrupts him and says…” Ty pauses and looks over at Sheila, “Well, go on, Sheils, tell them what you said.” Ty waits for her to join in the story.
Sheila lowers her glass and smiles, though it doesn’t reach her eyes, “You too busy bragging about how satisfying your dick was? Then I made a comment suggesting that he seemed like he was trying to get into his buddy’s pants.” Everyone erupts into laughter at Sheila’s comment.
“So what did Cookie say?” Emma asks.
“Oh, Cookie couldn’t say shit because this beautiful woman just gave him his shit right back before he could get a word in.
I’m pretty sure from that point on he was in love.
” Ty answers. Gabbi giggles and places her hand on my leg under the table, her fingers stroking soft, calming circles inside my thigh.
My heart quickens at the contact, but my blood runs cold at the thought of possibly leaving her.
“The worst part was that I refused to give Jake my number, but he somehow found out that I worked at the local hospital. He showed up every damn day to try and get me to go out with him. God, he was a pain in my ass.” Sheila’s words are a bit slurred, and her eyes have glossed over.
“So, how did he win you over?” Sabrina asks through a giggle.
“The jerk showed up every night for two weeks, until I finally caved. That last night, he came in and sang Usher’s You Got It Bad at the top of his lungs in the middle of the freaking emergency room.
You know the song,” the girls break out into singing a song I haven’t heard since high school.
Fucking Cookie. Sheila shakes her head and giggles when the girls stop singing. “It was utterly embarrassing.”
“And romantic, huh? I mean, it worked.” Sabrina shrugs with a swoony look on her face. Wolf just rolls his eyes and shakes his head.
“I said I would go out with him just to get the ass to shut up and stop embarrassing me.” We all laugh at Sheila’s candidness.
“Eventually, the big goofball won me over.” Tears brim in her eyes again, and the laughter dies down.
Ty wraps his arm around Sheila and pulls her in for a hug, sinking her into his side.
Wolf breaks the short span of silence after a few moments, “Hey, does anyone know where D went? I haven’t heard from him since he left a couple of hours ago.”
We all meet each other’s eyes and silently shake our heads in response.
I add, “I tried calling a couple of times, but his phone is off. I’ll try him again in the morning.
He’s probably just blowing off steam.” With everyone in agreement, we continue with our Cookie stories for another hour before heading home.