Twenty-Five
Draven
A s expected, I didn’t sleep at all last night. The day we’ve both been dreading is here, and it doesn’t matter how long I try and think of some sort of plan — I have nothing. I have no way to ensure the safety of the woman I love and our child aside from killing my entire family. And although I could do without my father and step-mother, the prospect of killing Alex actually bothers me.
It’s possible I wouldn’t have to, but with his blind loyalty to my father, I don’t truly know how he would react. If he made me choose, I already know it’d be her. I feel guilty about it, because he’s my brother, but when a man chooses the woman he wants as his life partner, he chooses her above everyone else. He’s vowing to hold her safety above everything, to respect her opinion more than anyone’s, and if a man isn’t ready for that level of a commitment, then he doesn’t deserve the devotion women are capable of giving.
I may not deserve it yet either, but by choosing her no matter which way the wind blows, I think I have the potential to get there.
I just need time.
Something neither of us have, because we’re both supposed to be getting dressed for her and my brother’s wedding.
I can’t believe we’re here.
I was an idiot all these months. I pushed this day to the back of my mind and pretended we’d find a way out of it, and yet here we are.
I did nothing to free her from these chains, therefore I’ve failed her, and if I’ve failed her how the hell am I supposed to ever look her in the eyes again?
Fuck.
An unfamiliar burn stings the back of my nose, reminding me of all the times my father would spank me until I stopped crying if I ever showed him my tears, and the memories only make me angrier.
All of this is his fault. I’m not the same little boy that he was able to beat into submission, but I also won’t shed any tears. They’ve never done me any favors.
So I finish up my tie with jerky movements, and try like hell to think of a plan.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Draven?”
Miss Maddy wouldn’t bother me right now unless it was important. “Yeah, come in. Everything okay?”
The sheepish expression on her face has me straightening. “They’re waiting for you.”
“Who?”
“Everyone.”
The fuck? “Why?”
“Because the wedding starts in seven minutes.”
My head swings toward the clock, and I realize with a jolt that I had been staring at the ugly plywood that covers this cold room for over an hour.
I didn’t go and find her like I promised I would.
I didn’t do anything at all.
Goddamnit!
I rush through everything as quick as I can and find myself skipping steps on the way down the creaky stairs. I’m not used to being in a damn suit or dress shoes, but I manage to make it outside the bride’s dressing room without falling once.
But no one is there. I’m too late.
“Where the hell have you been?” Father hisses. “You’re supposed to be up there already. Go.”
He shoves me slightly through a side entrance, and what I find waiting for me through the lace curtains is something that has me pausing.
I’d managed to avoid any and all information about this dumb affair, so as I take in the decorations around the church, I find myself wondering if this wedding fits her at all.
Did she pick any of this?
I barely even notice the fact that the whole damn city is in attendance as I approach the altar with its white and pink flowers and gaudy lace. None of them matter. Alex is standing there waiting for me looking ashen and borderline distraught — two things someone about to get married should never be — and he’s already got a Keeper, a Warden, and a Royal by his side.
I force my steps to stay steady as I join him and look to Sully’s side. My eyes widen slightly when I see Morella in her obnoxious pink dress standing where the maid of honor should. Another one of Father’s tricks, I’m sure.
How could we have let this cold-hearted bastard win? What does that make us?
I’ve droned on and on about how I’d never be father’s bitch, and now I’m standing here waiting for my woman to be given to another man.
I’m a coward. We’re all fucking cowards.
“This is bullshit,” I mutter toward my brother. “This your wedding or your mother’s pink fucking parade?”
“I think you know the answer to that,” he snaps quietly. “We were told when and where to show up, that’s it.”
They said where to be and we showed up like show monkeys in fucking suits.
Breathing becomes difficult as I allow that to sink in, my hands clammy and clenched at my sides as I fight the urge to make a scene. There’s so many important people here it’s tempting to ruin this day for everyone — especially Ephraim and Verna. If they could feel a fraction of how shitty we feel, it’d be worth it.
But how will she feel?
Something tells me she’s hoping for it while the rest of her is too scared for her life.
For our child’s life.
I have to keep my shit together.
My hands clench painfully at my sides as the doors open once more and she walks in with her father. She’s too far away for me to see her eyes, but I don’t need to. I can feel her fear and sadness from here, radiating off of her in waves. Her veil doesn’t cover her face, it falls behind her back flowing behind her in a way that makes it hard to stay where I am. But when I take a step forward, my brother’s hand snaps out to grab my arm.
Good thing no one is looking at us. She’s so damn beautiful it’s impossible for anyone to look away, but they don’t see what I see underneath all that beauty as I tug my arm away from him and give her all my attention again. They don’t see how much she wants to run. They don’t feel how badly I’ve failed her.
Fuck, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t fix this. Please don’t give up on me yet. I will save you. I don’t care who I have to kill to give you the life you deserve.
This is far from the end of our story.