Chapter 13
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
It was weird how much Chaos looked forward to going home every day.
Weird because he was the kind of pilot who wanted to spend as much time at work as possible.
Didn’t mind when he had to stay late. But now, as soon as they were released from training flights or meetings, he rushed straight home. To see Kara.
He’d never thought much about living with a woman, and he was finding it so much better than he ever thought it could be. At least with Kara. She was extremely easy to be around. She was funny even when she wasn’t trying, and she had a calming personality.
He was becoming very familiar with her likes and dislikes, knew when she was overthinking things, and when she was worried about something.
And right now, she was definitely worrying. It was bothering Chaos that he had no idea what was going on in her head. He’d asked her, but she’d said she was fine, that it was nothing.
But it was something.
She’d stare as if she was on the verge of asking him a question, only to chicken out at the last minute. And Chaos wasn’t happy that she seemed to have something on her mind but was afraid to talk to him about it.
It had been a week since Laryn and Penny had dropped by for a visit, and it didn’t seem like a coincidence that Kara’s odd behavior started that very day.
Leading him to wonder if they’d said something to make her second-guess their living arrangement.
Or if they’d discussed something that made her concern about Nolan rise to the surface.
Whatever was bothering her, he wished she’d talk to him, so he could attempt to assuage her fears.
Other than whatever she seemed mildly worried about, things between them were going well, as far as Chaos was concerned.
The accounting job she’d gotten had gone a long way toward making her feel more independent.
She’d insisted on taking him out to eat when she’d gotten her first paycheck.
It wasn’t large, since she hadn’t been working long, but the pride she’d felt was easy to see.
The more Chaos was around Kara, the more he liked her.
The feeling he’d had when he’d first seen her in that tree increased daily.
There were moments he felt as if he’d known her forever.
Everything he learned about her made him eager to know more.
The feeling that they were meant to meet had only grown stronger as the weeks went by.
Which was why Chaos decided he wasn’t going to let her shy away from whatever was bothering her any longer.
He’d texted to let her know he was stopping for Chinese food for dinner, and the delicious smells filling his car were making his stomach growl. He and Edge had skipped lunch so they could be first up on their training flight, and in turn allowed to leave base a little early.
His copilot had been just as eager to leave work as Chaos. In truth, Edge had been in a nasty mood for a couple weeks now…and Chaos was pretty sure it had nothing to do with his ex, and everything to do with the new guy Jen was seeing. The fact that she was dating someone at all, that is.
As usual, Chaos pulled into the garage and waited for the door to close all the way before he got out. He grabbed the food and headed into the house.
“Kara? I’m home!”
There was no answer—and it made Chaos’s heart stop in his chest for a moment.
Even though the detective back in North Carolina was sure that Nolan had been in that burned-out car, Chaos wouldn’t feel Kara was completely safe until he knew for sure.
The hurricane had overwhelmed the state offices that did DNA testing, and they were weeks behind.
It was frustrating, but there was nothing neither he nor Kara could do. Even Tex’s hands were tied. Chaos had talked to him about the situation, and, while he commiserated, apparently even he couldn’t get the remains tested any sooner.
“Kara?”
“Arrow?”
He walked into the living area and saw her in the large beanbag in the corner, her favorite place to work and write these days. And sure enough, he saw she had her laptop with her and was peering over the edge of it as he entered the room.
“Let me guess, you lost track of time again,” he said with a smile.
She shrugged. “I’m at the drama part of the book, so…yeah.”
Chaos loved how lost in her words she got when she was working. She lived and breathed the characters in her books.
He’d discovered her pen name just a week and a half ago, because she’d left her computer open to the page where she uploaded her manuscripts, but he hadn’t told her that he knew. Instead, the first thing he’d done was download the first book in her series.
He wasn’t a voracious reader, but he’d found himself completely invested in the lives of the characters in her story. And when he’d gotten to the end of the book, he’d been completely clueless as to the identity of the spy.
The second book was already downloaded and ready for him to find time to read.
In his opinion, the books were as good as any thrillers he’d ever read, even by the hugely well-known and famous authors who were getting seven-figure deals. It just went to show that just because someone wasn’t a household name, didn’t mean they couldn’t write a damn good book.
Kara had so many layers. She was an introvert, there was no doubt about that, but when she was comfortable around people, she came out of her shell.
She was the first to offer her assistance in any way it was needed, always complimented the other women, and worked her ass off.
In short, she was the kind of partner Chaos had always wanted.
After putting the bags of food on the kitchen table, he walked over to the beanbag and held out his hand to help her out.
Kara smiled sheepishly at him. “Thanks.”
He hauled her up and out of the squishy seat and held her hand a beat longer than was necessary. They stared at each other for a moment, and just when he thought she was going to finally tell him what had been on her mind all week, she looked toward the table and the food.
“It smells great.”
Pushing his frustration down, Chaos nodded and led her over to the table. “I know you said you just wanted cashew chicken, but I got a few extra things, so we can have easy-to-heat meals for the next few days.”
“The next few days? Arrow, it looks like you got enough food to feed an army for at least a week!” she joked.
“I skipped lunch. I’m hungry,” he said, with a sheepish shrug.
“It’s not healthy to skip lunch,” she scolded lightly.
“What did you have for lunch?” he countered.
“Uh…we aren’t talking about me.”
Chaos laughed. “So you can lecture me about being healthy when you probably had a Little Debbie Snack Cake and some tortilla chips?”
“Hey, I also ate a PB&J sandwich. There’s a ton of protein in peanut butter.”
They shared a smile, and he shook his head. “Have a seat, I’ll get you a fork.”
“Maybe I should try the chopsticks again,” she mused.
“How about you eat with a utensil that actually gets the food from the plate to your mouth?” The last time she’d tried to use chopsticks, more food ended up on the table than in her stomach.
“Yeah, that’s probably best,” she agreed.
Over dinner, where they both shared several different entrees, they talked about their day.
It was adorable how excited she was about balancing spreadsheets and finding errors embedded deep within the numbers.
Accounting might not be something she had a passion for, but she was obviously good at it and took pride in her work.
She also described how far along in her story she’d gotten, and Chaos was anxious to get to read the finished version.
He told her about the long-ass meeting they’d had that morning and how fun it was afterward to try a few new maneuvers during their flight training.
When they’d both eaten their fill, they packaged up the leftovers together.
After everything was put away, he turned to Kara. “We’re friends, right?”
She looked at him in confusion. “Yes. I’d like to think so.”
“Then talk to me, Kara. Something’s been on your mind, and you’ve been worrying about it for a week.
Have I done something to make you feel as if you can’t be open with me?
I know you still struggle with flashbacks at night, and I don’t like that you need to leave a light on, but…
is there something else? Has something happened? ”
She looked startled, then guilty, dropping her gaze from his and looking down at her nails as if they held the answer to world peace.
Reaching out, Chaos gently put his finger under her chin and lifted her head, so he could see her eyes. The blue orbs were turbulent and full of uncertainty.
“Whatever’s going on in that beautiful head of yours, you can share it with me. I’ll always treat you with care, sweetheart.”
She licked her lips, sighed, then took a deep breath. “I know. This is just hard…”
“Take your time.” Chaos couldn’t help himself, running his fingers along her cheek to her hair.
He brushed it back from her face, marveling at how soft it was.
So different from his own. He’d never considered himself a very gentle man, but with this woman, he wanted to be as careful as he could so as not to scare her.
She’d already been through hell, and he wouldn’t do anything that would ever remind her of the violence in her recent past.
“What happened to me…it was bad. Awful. But it didn’t…it didn’t scar me for life,” she said, almost defiantly.
“That’s good.”
“I mean, I’m not going to let him keep me from having a relationship with someone. Being intimate.”
Chaos had no idea where Kara was going with this. He wasn’t uncomfortable with the topic, per se, but thinking about this woman being with anyone else wasn’t something he even wanted to think about. It hurt too much. “Okay.”
She stared at him, almost expectantly, and Chaos felt as if he was missing something—