Chapter Forty-Three
Brody
Was I a traitor?
Or a liar? Or just an overall shitty person?
There had to be a word for a guy who kept playing with his teammates every day without even mentioning the possibility he might not be renewing his contract at the end of the season.
Logically, I knew guys did this all the time. It made no sense to bring the topic up to anyone when I wasn’t even set on it myself. But still, I’d never been the type to keep secrets. I’d never been the type to do anything except tell people whatever the hell was on my mind at any given moment.
It was an issue, actually. So maybe I could just view this whole thing as an experiment in practicing my own self-control.
“What’s up with you?” my teammate Ryan said, skating up next to me during warmups. “Do you have something to tell us?”
I jerked my head in his direction fast enough to hurt. “What do you mean?” I asked, feeling my eyes go wide and buggy.
Play it cool. Play it cool.
He narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
“This.” He gestured a hand up and down the length of me. “You’re acting twitchy as hell lately. The guys sent me over to ask if you’re on something.”
I blinked. Okay, I guess he wasn’t as on to me as I thought he was.
“What the hell? No.” I said, affronted. “Why would you even think that? We get drug-tested.”
He shrugged. “Didn’t know if you just didn’t care, since you and your girl split or whatever.”
Yeah, I thought wryly, I guess I need to work on my nervous tics.
“Well, I’m not on drugs.” I said. “And even if I was, do you think I’d tell you?”
“Sounds incriminating.” He looked at me skeptically. “So, are you saying there’s a chance you might be?”
“No, I’m just pointing out the error in your methods,” I said, mostly because I was prone to rambling and helplessly trying to deflect from the real reason I’d been a bit on edge lately.
“Whatever, man.” he said, not looking entirely convinced. “Just don’t screw us over with a shitty performance tonight, okay? We’re counting on you.”
I scoffed. “When have I ever?”
“Never.” Ryan grinned. “That’s why we were worried. We can’t afford to lose you. You’re one of the best we’ve got.”
My eyes widened. It was rare to hear something like that, especially from a guy like Ryan. And look, I knew my stats. I knew that I was a fan favorite. But it was one thing to see social media posts about you made by strangers online, and quite another to be told it by your own teammate.
“I got you,” I told him, feeling like a liar. “You know that.”
For now.
“Good man,” he said, slapping my back. “And whatever’s bugging you, try to let it go on the ice. I mean, that’s the good thing about this game, right? Perfect way to kill off steam.”
“Yeah,” I agreed. “I’ll do that.”
“You’re a good guy, Callahan. I’m sorry to hear about you and your girl splitting, but you always have us.” He looked behind him to our teammates skating around the ice during warmups. “You know that, right?”
I felt like too much of a fraud to respond in words, so I just gave him a tight nod and skated off, knowing I couldn’t promise the same.
But I could promise to give them all I’ve got while I was still here.