Chapter 49 Tigerlily
Chapter Forty-Nine: Tigerlily
The school registration paperwork sits in front of me on the kitchen table.
I’ve filled out Zinnia’s name three times. Erased it twice. My hand keeps shaking.
“You okay?” Jax asks from across the table.
“Yeah. Just nervous.”
“She’s going to be fine. It’s just school.”
“I know. It’s just...” I set the pen down. “I never thought…”
“This is a good thing.”
“I know. It is. I’m just—” I look at him.
Zinnia walks into the kitchen in her new school uniform. The one we bought yesterday at Target. Navy blue polo. Khaki pants.
“How do I look?” she asks, spinning around.
“Perfect,” I tell her. “You look perfect.”
“I look like a nerd.”
“Nerds are smart,” Jax adds. “They get fancy careers and make good decisions.”
She grins at him. “Or they play video games all day and know random facts that literally gets them nowhere in life.”
“You ready?” I ask, watching Jax’s eyebrows raise. I widen my eyes at him.
Zinnia shrugs. “I guess. Are you walking me in?”
“Of course. I have the papers filled out. Hopefully we qualify for free lunch.”
Jax gives me a look, and then I’m out the door.
We drive to the elementary school. It’s only ten minutes away, which is nice in case of emergencies.
I walk her to the front office, get her checked in, and meet her teacher.
“She’ll be fine,” the teacher assures me. “We’ve had lots of transfer students lately. She’ll adjust quickly.”
Zinnia hugs me goodbye. “See you after school.”
“See you after school.”
I watch her walk down the hallway with the teacher and disappear around the corner.
And I stand there feeling like I just lost a piece of myself.
I walk back to my car and sit in the driver’s seat for five minutes, staring at the school before I can start the engine.
She’s at school. She’s safe. She’s okay. Dad’s in prison. He’s not coming out.
I drive back to the house and check my phone.
Marcus texted an hour ago.
Can you come by the office? Need to prep for the hearing.
Me: What time?
Marcus: Eleven.
Me: I’ll be there.
I show up at Marcus’s office at ten fifty.
He’s waiting in the conference room with folders spread across the table.
“Tigerlily. Thanks for coming. Have a seat.”
I sit and try to calm my racing heart.
“So the hearing is in one week. The judge will ask about your living situation, your income, your support system. I need you to be prepared for some difficult questions.”
“Okay.”
“The main concern will be stability. They want to know Zinnia has a safe, consistent home environment.”
“She does—”
“You live with three men,” Marcus says carefully. “Not judging. Just stating facts. The court will ask about that.”
My stomach drops. “It’s just two men and… will they use it against me?”
“Depends on how we frame it. If we present it as a strong support system, it helps your case. If it looks unstable or inappropriate like a college frat house, it hurts.”
“It’s not inappropriate or a college frat house, we’re just roommates.”
“I know. But you need to be able to explain the relationship in a way that makes sense to a family court judge.”
I stare at the table. “How do I do that?”
“Honestly. Who lives in the house?”
“Me. Zinnia. Jax Kingsway. Zephyr Wickerham.”
“And Callum Brixton?”
“He has his own place. But he’s around a lot.”
Marcus makes a note. “And your relationship with these men?”
The question hangs there.
“We’re friendly,” I say finally.
He watches me carefully. ”Friendly?”
I hesitate.
“I need the full truth here, Ms. Lopez, because without it, I cannot help you.”
“I... care about all three of them.”
“Romantically?”
My face heats, feeling guilty. “Yes.”
“All three?”
“Yes. Kind of. Not really. I don’t know. Right now, it’s just Jax.”
Marcus sets his pen down. “Okay. Here’s what we’re going to do.
We’re going to be honest with the court with your current relationship.
We’ll keep the focus on Jax. He’s your boyfriend, and you’re in a committed relationship with him.
You have stable housing, income, and a support system.
He is employed, responsible, and invested in Zinnia’s well-being. ”
“What if the judge doesn’t approve?”
“Then we appeal. But I don’t think it’ll come to that. You’ve done everything right. Zinnia is thriving. That’s what matters.”
We spend the next hour going over potential questions. How to answer. What to emphasize.
By the time I leave, my head is spinning.
I drive back to the house and park in the driveway. I sit for a moment trying to catch my breath.
My phone rings. It’s an unknown number. I almost don’t answer. Then I see the suggested caller: California Department of Corrections.
My heart stops.
I answer. “Hello?”
An automated voice: “You have a collect call from an inmate at California Institution for Women. To accept charges, press one.”
I press one. My hand is shaking so hard I almost drop the phone.
“This call is being recorded and monitored. You have fifteen minutes.”
“Lily?”
My mom’s voice.
I haven’t heard it in six years.
The tears start immediately. I can’t stop them.
“Mom.”
“Lily… are you crying?”
“I’m sorry.” The words choke out. The two words that I’ve been dying to tell her all this time. “I’m so sorry.”
“Lily, no. You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“I put you in prison. I lied. I let him—”
“I know, baby. It’s okay. It’s okay…”
“It’s been six years, mom.”
“I’m in here because of Damien. Not you.”
I’m sobbing now, sitting in the driveway crying so hard I can barely breathe.
“Are you safe?” she asks. “Please tell me you’re safe.”
“I’m safe. I finally got guardianship over Zinnia. I just got home from the lawyer’s office.”
“Zinnia’s living with you?” Her voice breaks. “How?”
“CPS. Emergency placement. The hearing’s next week.”
“Oh, thank God, Lily. That’s—” She’s crying now too. “I’m so proud of you.”
“I don’t deserve that.”
“Yes, you do. You got your sister back. You got away from him. You’re safe. That’s everything I wanted.”
“Marcus said the appeal is moving forward. That you might get out soon.”
“I know. He told me. I can’t believe it’s really happening.”
“It should have happened six years ago.”
“But it’s happening now. Let’s not focus on the past.”
We’re both quiet for a moment. Just breathing. Just being here together even though we’re miles apart.
“How are you really?” she asks. “Marcus mentioned you were living with some people.”
My chest tightens. “Yeah. I’m living with... friends.”
“Friends?”
I can hear the question in her voice. The knowing.
“How many friends, Lily?”
I close my eyes. Can’t lie to her. “Two.”
She pauses. “Are they good people?”
“Yes.”
“Do they know? About everything?”
“They… they saved my life. They’re helping me with Zinni.” They’re the reason I haven’t completely lost myself.
I inhale a deep shaky breath and exhale, letting the tears fall from my eyes.
Another pause. Longer this time.
“Are you happy?” she asks quietly.
The question catches me off guard. “I... I don’t know. Sometimes. I think so.”
“Damien will be put away for a very long time. You don’t have to worry anymore.”
“Mom—”
“I spent seven years with him, making myself smaller. Trying to fit what he wanted. Trying to be enough. And it was never enough.” Her voice is steady now. Firm. “Don’t do that. Don’t make yourself less for anyone.”
“I’m not. I’m trying not to.”
“Good. Because you deserve to be loved exactly as you are.”
The tears start again. “I miss you, Mom.”
“I miss you too, baby. So much. But I’m going to see you soon. For real this time.”
The automated voice cuts in, “You have one minute remaining.”
“I have to go. Take care of Zinnia. Take care of yourself. And Lily?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you. Don’t ever forget that.”
My eyes fill with tears. “I love you too.”
The line goes dead.
I sit in the car staring at my phone, tears still streaming down my face.
My mom knows. She knows and she’s not angry. She’s not disappointed.
I wipe my face, get out of the car, and walk inside.
Jax is in the living room. He takes one look at me and stands.
“What happened?”
“My mom called.”
“Your mom?”
I nod. “I haven’t talked to her in years. She’s… she’s not mad at me.” I burst into tears.
Jax crosses the room, pulls me into his chest, and I cry into his shirt while he holds me.
“That’s good, Tiger,” he says quietly. “That’s really good.”
The front door opens, and Zephyr walks in. “Everything okay?”
“Tiger’s mom called,” Jax explains.
“Shit. Is she—”
“She’s okay,” I say quickly. “It was good.”
Callum appears behind Zephyr. “Whose mom called?”
“Mine,” I tell him.
“From prison?”
“Yeah.”
They all look at each other. Then at me.
I tell them about the call. About what my mom said. About how she wants me to be happy, and she thinks she’s going to get out of prison soon.
“Are you?” Zephyr asks. “Happy?”
I look at Jax and nod. “Yeah.”
“Good,” Jax says. His arm is around my shoulders.