Knot His Omega (Heated #6)

Chapter 1

Chapter One

FINNEGAN

T here’s a heavy weight sitting on my chest, and I know it’ll be there until I get my eyes on my ma.

Leaving Heated was my only choice, but part of me hates it, while the other part is…grateful.

I know Bree isn’t the omega for me, and I think I’ve known it for a while—I just wasn’t willing to admit it. Not while I was still on the show, anyway.

I’ll never say that anything about the fact that my ma dying is good for any reason, but I think it’s best for all parties involved I left. I think Bree would’ve come to the same conclusion—I wasn’t meant to be hers—eventually, but by then, how much more attached would we have been?

It’s bad enough leaving as late in the show as I am, and I hope to keep in touch with the many friends I made while on Heated —including Bree.

I practically shove my ticket at the woman, who scans it before waving me to board the plane. I don’t mean to be rude, but I just want to get home to Scotland.

What if she dies while I’m in the air? What if I never get to say goodbye?

I should’ve gone home more. I should’ve called more.

Fuck. Isn’t this always the worst part?

The regrets we feel when someone we love is dying or dead.

We can try to be the best people we can be in life, but there are always regrets.

How has it been five years since I visited home? How did I let it go on this long?

I love my parents with all my heart, but I nearly forgot about them after moving to America. At least, that’s what it feels like.

I’m a terrible son, and I’ve never regretted it more than at this moment.

I blink away the tears as I shove my carry-on suitcase into the overhead compartment over my first-class seat.

It’s something I could afford on my own, but I would never bother. Why spend more when I can spend less?

But I wasn’t the one who bought my ticket—that was Tessa and Bree. Yet another reason to be grateful to those two women, who changed my life in ways they can’t even imagine.

Without even seeing the ratings, I know Heated is going to be a hit.

Everyone wants to see a happily ever after—especially played out on a screen in front of them.

It’s just too bad it’s not my happily ever after.

It’s not like I’m getting any younger, which is why I decided to give the reality dating show a chance. But it just wasn’t meant to be.

Maybe I’m just not meant to find an omega or a pack. Maybe I’m just meant to spend my life alone .

I guess that wouldn’t be the worst thing. After all, I have Luna, my beautiful baby girl.

I think I might be okay with being nothing more than a dog da.

Maybe.

Shaking my head, I settle into my window seat as I shove my laptop bag underneath.

I’m not really sure why I grabbed it when I’m not currently seeing any patients.

I guess it’s a habit to take it wherever I go, and it’s not like I’ve been able to browse the internet for the last six weeks or so.

I should probably catch up on what’s going on in the world—when I can focus on anything else besides worrying about my ma.

Fuck.

I can’t believe she’s dying.

Getting that phone call at the beginning of the week, where my da admitted they’d been keeping her cancer a secret from me, had been devastating.

Getting the call that I need to come because she’s dying?

Unimaginable.

What will a world without my ma look like?

I’m not sure I want to know.

I look up as a man goes rushing past me toward the regular seats, and the plane door is closed behind him by an attendant.

Damn. It looks like I just made the flight.

I wasn’t even paying attention to the time when the limo dropped me off at my house. I didn’t even bother unpacking the clothes I brought with me to film Heated . I just grabbed my carry-on and filled it up with clothes and the essentials before grabbing my laptop bag and rushing back to the limo.

My ticket was already on my phone, so I blew through security and rushed to the gate. It never even occurred to me I might miss my flight—even though I knew it was going to be tight .

But I made it, and thirty minutes later, we’re taking off.

I have a long flight ahead of me. Flying from Los Angeles to Glasgow is an eleven-hour flight, then I have a little over an hour drive to the coastal town I grew up in.

Before the Event, Glasgow wasn’t a coastal city, nor was Glenmore, the town I grew up in. Much of Scotland, Ireland, and the UK’s east coasts were wiped out by tsunamis that blew through on that fateful day. Scotland lost something like five thousand miles of coastlands to the sea.

We’ve seen the maps from before the Event, and it’s crazy to think just how much everything changed that day.

Besides the obvious changes in humans.

It’s hard to believe that alphas, betas, and omegas haven’t always existed, since it’s the only life we’ve known, but I can only imagine the hell our ancestors went through when they realized they’d changed. And then on top of that, the world they lived in changed.

Two hundred plus years removed from that, it’s not something I think about often, but my mind is a mess right now.

Which is okay.

Grief does weird things to people. I’m aware of that.

It doesn’t mean it’s any easier to deal with.

I might understand the intricacies of grief and how it affects the human body and mind, but it’s something completely different dealing with it myself.

Logically, I know what’s going on, but it’s like that part of myself is detached.

I lay my head against the window, my eyes falling shut as they fill with tears.

I’m not ready to say goodbye. We should’ve had years longer than this.

My ma is only sixty-three .

Why does she have to die so young? She should’ve had at least another twenty years of life.

She’ll never get to see me find an omega or a pack. She’ll never get to meet her grandchildren—assuming any of that happens.

Hell, she’s never even met Luna, her grandpup.

If there had been more time, I would’ve tried to bring her with me, but bringing an animal overseas requires more than just buying a ticket.

I miss her so much, and the idea of being away from her any longer kills me.

But I have to see my ma. I have to say goodbye. I have to tell her how much I love her and how sorry I am for not visiting more. That I’ll miss her, and how my world will never be the same without her in it.

Bloody hell.

I’m a mess.

“Mr. Abernathy?” A hand touches my shoulder, and I start as my head whips around.

The flight attendant holds up her hands. “I’m sorry. I was calling you, but you weren’t responding, but I didn’t think you were sleeping.”

“No. Not sleeping—just lost in my head. I’m sorry.”

“That happens. No need to apologize. Would you like something to drink or a snack? We’ll be serving dinner in about two hours, but I just want to make sure you’re comfortable until then.”

“Uh…” My mind goes completely blank, and while I understand what she’s asking, it’s not processing.

Like I said, I’m a mess.

She offers me a soft smile. “Why don’t I check with the others, and then I’ll come back to you?”

I sigh. “Aye, that’s probably a good idea. ”

She nods, gesturing toward the seat pocket in front of me. “There’s a menu there. You can look it over to decide what you’d like.”

“Thank you.” I try to offer her a smile, but I’m not sure if it works.

As she walks away, I grab the menu from the pocket and look it over. There’s a large selection of alcohol, and I’m seriously considering getting something—even though I know how much worse alcohol can affect the way I’m feeling right now.

I wish I could turn off the psychologist side of myself at times like this. I just want to forget about the hell I’m heading toward right now.

But that’s not going to happen, no matter how much I drink, so when the attendant comes back, I order a soda and a small snack.

Knowing I’ll need to open my tray anyway, I pull out my laptop and get it set up.

Of course, as soon as it opens, it needs to run an update, but by the time the attendant returns with my drink and snack, it’s booting back up.

“Thank you…” I trail off, realizing I never bothered to get her name. “I’m sorry. My head is kind of all over the place. What was your name?”

She offers me another soft smile. “It’s Tabatha, Mr. Abernathy. I’ll be with you the whole flight, so if you need anything, just let me know. You can press that button right there if I’m not in the cabin.”

I glance down at the button on the armrest and nod. “Thank you, Tabatha. I appreciate you. I’ll let you know if there’s anything else I need.”

Her smile grows, lighting up her face, and I realize she’s very pretty. Her blonde hair is up in a ponytail, and her makeup accentuates her bright blue eyes. In another time, I might have flirted with her, but today, I’m not feeling much up for flirting.

It’s likely the accent. My brogue seems to drive Americans crazy.

I catch just a hint of her scent—coconut and something floral—that tells me she’s a beta.

We’re required to douse ourselves in descenting products before entering the airport, and the air filtration systems on airplanes are fairly effective—especially when adding in the scent cancelers it blows into the cabin. It’s the only way for everyone to be safe while flying.

I turn back to my laptop as she stands there for another moment before walking away. I think she was hoping I’d flirt with her.

Sorry, Tabatha. It’s just the wrong day for that.

Since I don’t really feel like dealing with anyone else, I recline my chair and lower the top until I’m mostly enclosed in the pod-like seat.

First class always has these seats, no matter how long the flight is, but I know back in coach, all the seats are pods as well for long, international flights.

I start scrolling through the internet, catching up on the last few weeks of news.

I’m surprised at how many mentions there are of Heated. My name and picture are all over the internet, and I wonder if Tabatha recognized me. Is that why she was so happy to talk to me?

Bloody hell. I did not sign up for this kind of attention.

But I kind of did, didn’t I?

Heated has blown up all over the world, and everyone is talking about who they’d like to see make it to the final rose ceremony and into Bree’s pack.

Since the show airs about two weeks behind, no one knows I’ve left just yet.

There are a surprising number of people who think I should make it to the end.

Too bad for them, they’re going to be disappointed.

I know I should see what else has been going on in the world, but I seem to lose myself in a spiral of everything Heated .

So much so that I startle when there’s a knock on my pod.

I raise the lid to find Tabatha standing there.

“I just wanted to see if you’ve decided what you’d like for dinner? As soon as I have everyone’s orders, I’ll be serving you.”

Shit. Has that much time passed already?

“Uhh…” I grab the menu out of the pocket, glancing over the options. “I’ll take the pork chops.”

She nods. “An excellent choice. I’ll be back shortly.”

I close my laptop, deciding I don’t need to get lost on the internet any longer. It doesn’t matter what they’re saying about the show since I’m not on it anymore. I’ll worry about the world news later.

For now, I’ll eat my dinner and try to get some sleep. Jet lag is going to be a bitch no matter what, but if I can get a couple of hours of sleep, maybe it won’t be too bad.

I glance at my watch and do a quick calculation. Less than eleven hours until I can see my ma.

I can do this.