Chapter 3
Chapter Three
FINNEGAN
I don’t know how long we sit there like that, but eventually, our tears dry up, and the nurses come in to unplug Ma from the machines.
I appreciate their letting us have some time before they come in. It’s not that I care if others see me cry…I just…
I don’t fucking know.
Now that my tears have dried up, my thoughts are bouncing all over the place.
Ma is dead.
Gone.
It’s just me and Da now.
My head shoots up, eyes clashing with his as anxiety rises inside me. “Da…I…I cannae…”
Da gives me a sad smile. “I understand. Go. Call me and let me know you’re okay, and please come home when you can.”
“I love you, Da.” I throw my arms around him, and we cling to one another. “I’ll come back when I can…I just need… ”
“Time and space. Of course you do. I love you, my boy. I’ll be waiting for you at home.” Da pats my back before releasing me. He tries to give me a smile, but he ends up grimacing. “I’ll let your aunt and uncle know. I’m sure they’ll insist on coming to the house.”
I sigh. “Of course they will. I’ll be home when I can. I love you, and I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” Da assures me. “You’ve always needed time and space to deal with big emotions.”
Not knowing what else to say, I just nod and head for the rental car.
I climb inside and pull out of the parking lot, having no idea where I’m heading but knowing I need to get away.
When I pull into a parking lot, I don’t know why I’m surprised I ended up here. This was always my go-to place when I needed to think.
Glenfinnan National Park has been around for at least the last hundred years.
It’s only about thirty minutes from Glenmore, so we came here often when I was a child.
Then, when I was old enough to drive, I’d come on my own.
There’s just something about hiking the land of my ancestors that allows me to clear my head.
I don’t know if it’ll help today or not, but I’m willing to give it a try.
It’s chilly because it’s still winter here in Scotland, and I only packed my leather jacket, which I pulled on when I stepped out of the airport.
Shucking my jacket, I open the trunk and dig into my suitcase. I pull out an old flannel shirt I’m pretty sure used to be my da’s and tug it on and quickly do up the buttons. It’s thick enough to cut off the worst of the cold when I pull the jacket over it.
I pop the collar of the jacket up and lock the car before dropping the keys in my pocket and starting down the path.
At the first split, I veer off to the right.
The main path circles the entire park before ending up right back where you start, but there are many smaller paths that lead to specific parts of the park.
Luckily, I grew up walking these paths, and though it’s been over five years since I’ve been here, I remember the way to the overlook well.
It’s easy to get lost in the park if you don’t know your way around—even with the signs posted everywhere. I’m just glad I don’t have to worry about that.
My eyes move across the landscape as I walk, and I find myself grateful to be in my homeland.
I really do need to come home more often—especially now that Ma is gone. Da is going to be all alone.
I wonder if he’d want to move to America with me. I hate the idea of his being here all on his own, but I don’t know if I can convince him to leave Scotland.
A problem to worry about another time.
Breathing in the scent of home, it settles me more than anything else could as I continue down the path.
This area is heavily wooded, but I know the ocean lies just beyond the small hills and mountains before me.
That’s where I’m heading, though it’ll take me about half an hour to forty-five minutes to reach the lookout. The first part of the hike is easy, but as I reach the hills and mountains, I curse myself for not being in better shape.
It’s not that I don’t exercise, but there’s a big difference between a gym and hiking.
But it’s all worth it when I step onto the lookout, every negative emotion leaving my body as I stare at the beauty before me.
The lookout is only about a quarter of the way up the mountain, if that.
There’s a guardrail along the far edge, as it’s a pretty much sheer drop to the bottom on the other side.
My parents used to tell me horror stories of people falling off before the guardrail, so it took me a long time to go near it as a child.
But now, I stalk over without a thought of the height as a heavy weight rests on my chest once more at the thought of my ma.
Spread before me are the rolling hills with the ocean on the far side of them, a few smaller ponds and lakes beside them. In the spring, they’ll be a bright, vibrant green, but in the winter, their color dims. It’s still a beautiful sight, but it makes me miss the spring months.
By the time they grow brighter, I’ll be back in America.
A wave of homesickness hits me, baffling me as I’m standing here right now.
My eyes fall closed as I take a deep breath, and once again, everything falls away.
This right here is why I love this spot so much.
Not only is it beautiful, but it helps settle me. Seeing that I’m part of such beauty is…
I don’t even know how to describe it, but it’s just what I need right now.
“I love you, Ma,” I murmur, blinking my eyes open. I feel like she’s standing right beside me as we stare out at the land we call home.
She loved Scotland so damn much. She loved the rolling hills, the mountains, and the sea. She always said she would live nowhere besides Glenmore because it was home, and it was perfect.
I find my lips tugging up at the corner, and I know she’d be happy that this is where I ended up after we said our goodbyes. She loved this place just as much as I do .
I wonder if we can spread her ashes from up here. She’d love that. I’ll have to ask Da if that’s something we can do.
Pain clamps down on my chest, and tears spring to my eyes.
I hate that she’s gone. I’ll never hear her voice again, or see her smiling up at me with pride in her eyes. But I’ll never forget any of it.
Ma might not live in this world anymore, but she’ll live on in my memory—in Da’s.
A sob has my head jerking around, eyes wide as I see a woman stagger up the path I just climbed up.
She’s dressed better for the weather than I am, with a heavy coat, a hat, and gloves, but as her eyes shoot up, I realize she’s nearly hyperventilating.
“Help,” she sobs, collapsing to her knees.
I rush over to her, pulling her into my arms as her scent hits me and my eyes go wide.
She smells like all the best parts of fall, more specifically like fallen leaves.
An omega.
Why is an omega wandering around the park on her own?
She clings to me, sobbing as I stare down at her.
I only got a glimpse of her face before she fell, but I find my hand in her beautiful red hair—so like my ma’s—as I hold her against me.
“Shhh. It’ll be okay,” I assure her as I run my hand down her back. “Take deep breaths for me, yeah?”
I pull away from her, cupping her cheeks as I take a deep breath in before letting it out. It takes a few times for her to catch on, and then another minute for her pretty gray eyes to clear.
“Hi,” I say softly .
She flushes, trying to duck her head, but I refuse to relinquish my hold.
“It’s okay. Everything is fine. My name is Finnegan Abernathy, but you can call me Finn. What’s your name?”
She blinks up at me, sniffing quietly. “Alora. Alora Harris.”
An American? Here?
She must’ve gotten lost.
“I’d say it’s nice to meet you, Alora, but I prefer not to meet omegas when they’re sobbing.”
She giggles, and the sound makes me smile. Even though she is upset, she’s gorgeous. And she smells amazing.
I run my hand down her cheek. “Okay, Alora. Why don’t you tell me why you staggered up here sobbing? It’s not something I usually run into up here.”
She giggles again before her face falls. “I lost my pack.”
Her words have my eyes falling to her neck, and there it is—a bite mark.
Well, fuck.
It doesn’t matter how pretty she is or how good she smells. She already has a pack.
Not that it changes anything. She’s still an omega in need, and I will help her find her pack because it’s the right thing to do.
It’s what Ma would expect of me.
Hell, it’s what I expect of myself.