Chapter 13
Thirteen
JASPER
F riday rehearsals are typically my favorite. The entire symphony playing through the program, listening to all our work coming together into something inspiring and touching and sometimes extraordinary is the push I often need by this point in the week. Typically. Today, I can’t focus on fuck all except the image of Violet on the mandatory video call last night.
I swear, I saw tears in her eyes. And not just once, but multiple times. I’d been prepped for anger or hatred. Cold disdain, even, like she felt I was beneath her. I hadn’t been prepared to see the flash of vulnerability when Rylan asked her about school.
Of course she made it into UCLA. It was her dream school. She’d worked her ass off junior and senior years to get a high enough SAT score to offset the four Cs she’d gotten as a sophomore. Not to mention the volunteer work she’d done to prove she was invested. She’d been here, in LA, the last four years. Not long after I left Seattle, really.
All those moments where I thought I saw her, could have sworn I recognized her in a crowd. What if I had truly seen her? What if she had gone to the symphony? Had she known I was here? Had she avoided me all this time?
Mason nudges me, interrupting my counting, but I look at him knowing I have a bit before the solo in the third piece.
“You good?” Mason mouths.
I nod, grabbing my bow and prepping for the solo, keeping my full attention on Giles where he stands at the front of the orchestra. This time, I can’t quite slip into the music, my mind still spiraling around everything that’s happened since Rylan opened the Council’s packet Wednesday night.
Do I hate her for that, the loss of my sanctuary? Or is it really the Council I’m angry with?
My gut twists. Or maybe it’s Dominic.
He left the house when he left the video call, slipping out without taking any of the cars, and hasn’t been home since. I slept in his bed last night, hoping to catch him when he finally came back. I woke up to the same empty bed I fell asleep in, the other side of his bed untouched. Rylan waited as long as he could before forcing me into the car so we wouldn’t be late to rehearsal. As it was, we arrived with barely enough time to get set.
Liz has been restless next to Mason all morning, her eyes darting to me at every break in the music. My throat dries out as I try to think about what I’ll tell her. The final note of the program rings out, and I try to sink into it, try to appreciate it like I’ve tried all week. But I can’t quite manage. Giles holds us in stillness longer than typical, his gaze sweeping over us all. When he finishes, he smiles and drops his arms, clapping his hands a couple times.
“Wonderful work,” he says, flipping through the music on his stand. “Call tonight is seven.”
He steps off the podium and heads toward his office, glancing at his watch and then his phone.
“Think he has some hot lunch date he needs to get to?” Mason murmurs, humor lacing his voice.
Liz laughs. “I’ve seen him with Natalie a couple times the last few weeks. Wouldn’t they be adorable together?”
I tune them out. What Giles does on his own time with another consenting adult isn’t any of my business. It takes me longer than usual to pack everything up, that sense of urgency that normally stirs me along nowhere to be found. Why rush when Rylan is already here and Dominic has been gone for nearly an entire day without even a text letting me know he’s all right?
Huntley’s eyes are too keen, like always, seeing more than I really want her to. She grabs my music and motions for Liz to head into the storage room, her lips set in a firm line.
“That bad?” she asks once our friends are out of ear shot. Not many people are left picking up their things in the concert hall, just a few of the violas that are chatting about plans for the weekend. “You look like you’ve been broken up with, Jas.”
My laugh is humorless. “Well…”
Huntley drops into the seat beside me.
“What happened?” All humor is gone, her eyes serious where she watches me. The last of the other musicians leave the stage, and I lean my head back, staring at the stage lights that are mostly turned off right now.
“Dominic’s pissed, and I haven’t seen him since last night,” I admit.
Huntley doesn’t know that we weren’t actually trying to get matched up with an Omega. No one does. It’s the type of thing that could land us in some serious fucking hot water with the Council. And you don’t just go around pissing off the United Council of Alpha and Omega Designations, Inquiries, and Concerns—not even if you have more than passing ties to the Italian mafia.
“He doesn’t like the Omega?” she asks when I don’t offer anything more.
I shake my head and stand up. “No. He wants to force a reassignment.”
Huntley raises an eyebrow and walks with me into the storage room. “That’s… that’s a big deal, Jas.”
My laugh is humorless. It’s also the only reply I can manage to muster at the moment as I get my cello put away and slung over my shoulders.
“Well, I was going to ask about meeting them if they’re going to be around this weekend, but…” She trails off, waiting to see if I’ll correct her. I don’t. “Give it a few days, Jas. I’m sure it’ll all work out. You figuring things out in the fall was pretty rocky, too. I can’t imagine the finesse it takes to introduce another person into a pack. Trying to reorient your life around one person is difficult enough.”
Fuck, I’d forgotten how nice it could be just to chat with another Beta, someone who didn’t have all the innate drives and needs of the other designations, someone who was just… normal. That awful thing that’s been clawing at my chest since Wednesday night pauses long enough for me to get a deep breath. Maybe this type of horrid awkwardness was normal at the beginning of being matched. It’s not like we saw Liz during that thirty day window. By the time we all reconvened in August, she was happily settled in with the four Alphas, her stacked rings a beautiful, if flashy, addition to her other jewelry.
Would Violet expect those? She probably would. They were traditional gifts given to an Omega within a pack. One ring for each person in the pack, typically tailored to the Omega’s taste and with enough variance to be easily distinguished within the set. Her mom had a trio that she’d wear at home and another, more ostentatious set she’d don when going to events, especially anything attached to Fallon Capital.
The necklace sits like a heavy weight against my sternum.
Or maybe she’d hand it back to me with another fucking note telling me I wasn’t good enough for her.
A hand on my elbow pulls me from the morose thought. Rylan’s eyes are full of concern, though his face stays blank. I lace my fingers with his, squeezing just enough to let him know I’ll be all right. Probably. He leans into me, pressing his lips to mine for a fleeting heartbeat, and then whispers in my ear.
“I’m meeting up with her.” My breath catches. He runs his nose along my jaw, a purr vibrating low in his chest. It’s just enough to make me relax. He still wants me, even with her around. Even with everything now different, and Violet and my’s ugly history on the table for him to examine, he still wants me. “I’ll be back in time for call. You take the car.”
I nod and kiss him, this time not caring when he deepens it, forcing it faster and messier than I typically am comfortable with at our workplace. Bergamot surrounds us, and another bit of that tight band around my chest eases away.
“I love you,” he murmurs as he pulls away. His eyes are bright, his hold on my hand unrelenting.
“Love you more,” I manage to whisper, trying for our old joke. Desire races across his face before he can hide it, and he takes another half-step into me, just enough that I can feel the line of his dick where it presses against his jeans. My stomach tightens, and a flash of heat shoots down my spine.
“Don’t make me prove that you’re wrong, Jas,” he murmurs. “You in a car is my favorite.”
His phone pings with a notification, and I hum, kissing him one more time. “I’ll see you tonight.”