Pack Troubles
Calista
“Ijust don’t understand. If their pack didn’t bail them out, then who did?” I circle the office for the fifth time, unable to stand still.
Nolan hunches over the computer, typing faster than I thought possible, his eyes glued to the screen. He doesn’t say anything for a minute, and I stop behind him to peer at the computer monitor.
His hand shoots up and blocks my view of Alexander’s mug shot.
He’s protecting me from a photo. The idea sends warmth crashing through me.
I’m not used to it. I’m used to having to protect myself.
Not that I’ve ever been in this position.
Ivy protected me within the Omega Resort, but it wasn’t personal. It was business. This is far from that.
“It could be a rival pack or someone who knows us and wants to use it against us. There’s no better way to fuck with me than to bail out assholes who tried to murder our omega…
or at least, who should be our omega.” Nolan doesn’t look at me when he says the words.
I knew this conversation would have to come. I promised I’d explain.
“I told you this would happen,” he continues. He groans and clicks off the website. Spinning in the chair, he faces me and reaches out to rest his hands on my hips. “I mean…I’m sorry. I’m stressed out.”
“Rightfully so. I haven’t made it easy. I just want to be independent.
It’s hard to explain.” I hope my presence looming over him will help him realize that my mind won’t change about what I want, despite the circumstances.
If my hand is forced, I’m not going to comply with the expectations of an omega.
“Why don’t you believe me when I say you’ll keep your independence with us?
You know I can’t help myself with you. I’ll give you whatever you want.
I’ll protect you. I’ll stand up for you.
I’ll worship you. I’ll do everything in my power to ensure you’re happy whether or not you think I should.
” Nolan tips his head forward, bonking it against my stomach.
His dark hair shines in the light, and I resist running my fingers through it.
“Tell me what I can do to change your mind. Stop being so stubborn, omega.”
I tighten my jaw, hiding my expression. He gets to me in a way that I want to obey him. I want to open myself up to him. “This isn’t helping your case, alpha. I told you I’m not changing my mind.”
Sliding his hands around me, he pulls me closer, pressing his face harder into me. The heat of his breath calms my nerves. He’s not angry. He’s trying to understand me.
“I’m not trying to change your mind. I’m trying to figure you out. Can you explain things to me now?”
“What about Jensen? He should know too.”
“I can’t wait. I need to know now. Please, Cali.”
His sudden closeness traps me in place, and my heart picks up a thrumming rhythm. I enjoy his company too damn much. He knows he gets under my skin, and he likes seeing it. I can tell because his fingers tap against my lower back in sync with my racing heartbeat.
“I won’t get mad or judge you. Please, tell me,” Nolan whispers, the hum of his voice tickling my stomach.
I close my eyes, trying to gather my courage.
Why am I so scared? Is it because he might not get it?
He says he won’t get angry, but how can he know for sure?
I should reject him now for Jensen’s sake.
He needs to know as well, and the thought of having to admit the truth again doesn’t make it easy.
He tugs me closer until I sit on his lap at his level. His knuckles caress my cheek, the softness of his touch unfamiliar. His fingers explore my skin with purpose and need. The last time we were this close was full of pent-up frustration and raw attraction. But now? His touch is a silent plea.
“You’re not going to like what I have to say,” I whisper, trying to remain composed, though his touch alone threatens to be the cause of my undoing. I’m weak for him.
“Try me.”
“I’m not the omega of your dreams. I have no desire to have children.
There is no convincing me otherwise. I’ve felt this deeply about my decision since the moment I understood what being an omega meant.
” I swallow the burning in my throat, my soul feeling as if I’m dying as each second ticks by without Nolan reacting.
His stoicism masks everything. I can’t even decipher a change in his scent, the very biology I can usually read like a favorite book.
“I’m not asking for you to give me children, Cali.” Nolan remains expressionless with his words. Brushing his fingers along my back, he plays with the sliver of skin peeking from my shirt.
“Yet. It wouldn’t be fair of me to agree to this arrangement.
You have needs as an alpha, and I’m unwilling to satisfy that one.
I’ve seen too much—been through too much.
Look at this situation. It solidifies everything for me.
So, I’m sorry. I can’t take the easy way out.
” I exhale a breath and try to pull away, but Nolan doesn’t let me go.
He holds me in place, keeping me to him.
I refuse to look at him. I hate not being able to read him in the moment. He’s infuriatingly good at remaining composed. It’s what makes him a good leader—the perfect alpha for Pack Kismet.
Perfect alphas need perfect omegas, and I can’t be one. I won’t be one.
“You’re making a lot of assumptions. I told you I’m not asking you for children.
I’m not even asking you to be my omega. All I’m asking is for you to take on the title of the Kismet Omega.
Govern beside me and my brothers. Protect our little sanctuary.
” Nolan touches my cheek, getting me to look at him.
His brown eyes imprison me, the darkness of their depths hypnotic. Alluring. I can’t look away. “Please.”
A thousand conflicted thoughts crash through my mind.
He says he’s not asking for children, and maybe that’s his truth right now, but there are no guarantees that his needs won’t change.
If I agree, this will be it. I’ll lose the chance at getting sterilized and freed from this life.
I’ll be following in my mom’s footsteps.
There are no guarantees that this will be any different.
“I just want you to think about—”
Nolan’s phone rings, cutting off his comment. He swivels in his chair and picks up his cell phone off the desk. Tapping the screen, he answers it, holding it away from his ear.
“Mr. Kismet, I’ve gone ahead and filed the paperwork like you asked.
We can proceed with the estate formalities.
Ms. Kismet won’t have to worry now. Whoever bailed the bastards of Pack Loomis out has wasted their money.
” I don’t recognize the voice, but I’m pretty sure it’s Nolan’s lawyer. What does he even mean?
“You were supposed to get me that information, Robbie,” Nolan says, keeping his voice even. He taps his computer awake, and I catch sight of the screen.
I don’t get a chance to read more than a line of the open email, but my heart sinks into my stomach because of it. It says the bonding application was accepted.
Confusion washes over me, and I stiffen in Nolan’s arms. What bonding application? I don’t understand. Did Nolan proceed with the official paperwork claiming me as an omega without even telling me? It would be in his right to do so no matter how much I protest.
“You don’t need it, sir. Everything is already set.” The lawyer chuckles, his voice grating on my nerves. Why does he sound so happy?
“Everything is set?” I ask, my heart racing out of control. “What do you mean everything is set?” I know Nolan’s lawyer can hear me if I can hear him.
“Oh, Calista. What a pleasant surprise and an honor to be speaking with you. Congratulations. I’m so happy things are now settled.”
I shove my hands against Nolan, pushing myself up.
I can’t risk him holding me any longer. “What was the point of our conversation? You gave me hope. I thought I was bearing my soul to help you understand. Did you think I’d change my mind?
I didn’t agree to this. Nolan, what have you done? I told you—”
“Omega, give me a minute.” Nolan frowns, revealing his emotions for the first time. I can’t tell if he’s annoyed by my reaction or by the fact that he got caught.
I clench my fingers. “No. I trusted you. Do your brothers know? You shouldn’t have done this without my consent. I can’t believe this.”
“Cali, wait. Please,” Nolan says, remaining at the desk. His muscles flex as he grips his phone. “I just need a minute to talk to the lawyer.”
I expected him to ask me to wait so he could explain, but he wants to talk to the lawyer? This is bullshit. This is utter bullshit.
“Take all the time you want. You better reverse whatever has been done. I mean it. I’ll never be your omega.
Not like this. Not against my wishes.” I spin around and head to the door, my anger and disappointment battling for control.
I should’ve known this is how things would be.
The Kismet brothers need me to claim the Kismet Estate.
My behavior probably made it easier for them.
I opened myself up, thinking that it would help them understand. Instead, they took advantage.
I slam the door behind me, my eyes burning with unshed tears. I need to call Ivy. She’ll help me. At least, I hope.
Because I can’t just settle.
I need to get out of here.
If I don’t, I’ll never be able to make my own decisions again.
I’ll be exactly what everyone wants me to be.
I’ll lose myself.