Chapter 3 #3
After pulling off my boots and socks, removing my jeans, I fell back into the bed, wearing my boxers and T-shirt. Because I hadn’t bothered turning on the lamp, I was forced to lie in the dark room, staring up at the ceiling and the dim lines formed by the porch light shining in through the window.
Sleep didn’t come, but I didn’t expect it to. My brain wouldn’t shut off; my thoughts of the day at the park, the horrific scene that had ended the world as I knew it.
I had no idea how long I'd been there when I heard the light squeak of the door opening. When I lifted my head, I thought I would see Kate or maybe Kade needing me to tuck them back in. My kids weren’t standing in the doorway, though.
“Everything all right?” I pushed myself up onto my elbows, watching Gage standing there, backlit by the light in the foyer.
“No,” he said simply, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him.
I was frozen in place. On one hand, I was grateful he had come to me because I needed comfort even if I didn’t deserve it. But at the same time, I was terrified Gage was going to finally lay the blame at my feet, where it belonged.
I held my breath, waiting to see which direction he was going with this.
I didn’t have to wait long when Gage moved closer, pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it to the floor. The next to go were his sweatpants, and then he was crawling over me, his hard, warm body a balm to my aching soul.
“I need you,” Gage whispered, and I could hear the tears in his voice.
I cupped his face. “I need you, too.”
I pulled Gage down to me, our lips seeking and finding the little bit of comfort they could provide. Time became obsolete as our tongues mated, hands roaming. At some point, we managed to remove my clothes, leaving us skin to skin.
It was easy to get caught up in the moment. It was a welcome distraction, something to hang on to for a short time before the world intruded again.
I didn’t ask for what I wanted, nor did Gage. We’d been together long enough to know what it took to please the other.
When Gage’s cool, slick hand gripped my cock, I realized my husband had come prepared.
With firm strokes, he lubed my cock, drawing long, ragged moans from my throat.
And when I could take no more, I settled between his thighs and sank into the blessed heat of his body.
I growled low in my throat as a sinful pleasure washed over me, a feeling I hadn’t expected to ever feel again.
At that point, time stood completely still. I stared down at Gage as I slid in deep, retreated. Over and over, again and again. I took my time, getting lost in the man because it was my only safe place. Right here, right now, with Gage, I could almost block out everything else.
“Harder,” he snapped, dragging me from my erotic trance.
In all the time I'd been with Gage, never had I heard such a dark command. It shocked me briefly, but I damn sure wouldn’t hold back if that was what my husband needed. Shifting so I was over him, my upper body balanced on my arms, I slammed my hips down, impaling him.
“Is that what you want?” I growled, the emotional turmoil roiling, writhing, turning what had been slow and sweet into an inferno of need and lust.
“Yes,” Gage hissed, his head falling back. “More.”
I slammed into him again, enjoying his hard, eager grunts.
Again and again, I didn’t hold back, driving in rough and deep, delivering that erotic bite of pain that would allow him to escape everything else for a while. It was what Gage needed. Hell, it was what I needed more than anything.
“Faster… Fuck me.” Gage exhaled harshly. “God, just fuck me.”
Realizing he was still attempting to escape it all, including our connection, I stopped, pulling out of his body long enough for us to shift positions, Gage rolling onto his stomach.
For whatever reason, this was a position that worked so much better for us, with me lying atop him, arms sliding under, fingers curling over Gage’s shoulders.
We were touching from chest to knee while I rocked, fucking him from behind.
And this way, Gage couldn’t escape. He would be overwhelmed by me, feel me everywhere.
Gage’s hands gripped my wrists as we were lost in the sensations together. This time the emotions were a tidal wave that took us both under. When Gage cried out, his orgasm triggered mine, dragging another ragged moan from me.
And when it was over, the only thing I could do was roll to my side, holding the man I loved as the tears broke free once again.
It would never be the same. We both knew it. What we had … without Kylie … even that was different. And we would have to figure out how to make it work for us.
I considered mentioning it to Gage, but I didn’t get the chance. A few minutes later, he pulled away, then got out of the bed. Without a word, he picked up his discarded clothes, pulled them on, then slipped out of the room, leaving me staring after him.
I hadn’t thought the hole in my chest could get any bigger, but right then, it did. With Gage pulling away, the chasm widened, making me feel empty and cold.
As I lay there, I prayed that Gage would find a way to forgive me because I wasn’t sure I could go on without him. I knew one thing for sure: I damn sure didn’t want to find out.