Chapter 39
Eliane
The mud under my heavy boots makes walking hard.
Leaves brush my skin, and the droplets stick on my face.
Braxton must have had a fight. The screaming of a man still rings in my ears as the maze sets in place again.
I felt him fight, but if he feels like fighting, he should.
I blocked him out during his pain. I couldn’t stand those feelings.
My gaze is pointed towards the ground. We all know how it ended the first time.
The mud goes over to dark wet green moss.
It sinks a bit and makes squishy sounds with every step I take.
Something catches my eyes, and I look up in a daze.
An animal sprinting in front of me, hurrying over the sort of path I am following. I make up my pace and follow the animal into the woods. Some kind of attraction or invisible strings pull me towards it. It has been a while since I saw a deer.
In the distance, a deer stands.
But something strange is happening with it. Not only does it turn their necks to look at me, no, it also gives light.
Like there is literally light coming off of them.
It is luminous.
Just like my skin gleams sometimes, that deer does too.
Before I can come closer, the deer sprints away.
My feet drag me after the animal, trying to see it again.
But it is nowhere to be found again.
My eyes scan the surroundings, but all I see are lined up trees and an incredible dark forest. The mountain isn’t visible, because of the high reach of the branches and leaves covering the sky above.
Luckily some sunlight shines through, and I can figure out where the sun stands.
The deer was a source of light, and I can’t wrap my head around it.
No deer I have ever seen before gave light.
And as far as I know, I haven’t read any historical literature about a light giving creature, and there isn’t much written about spirit animals, but could it be I just saw mine?
Maybe it is just my mind doing crazy things.
I did use a lot of magic yesterday, so maybe I am not completely recovered?
I duplicate the compass I made for Braxton and look at the sun above it.
The sun is rising and is now in the southeast. I hope I am right at it.
I have never nailed it before to create a hologram using my light, but when I did it, I couldn’t tell that I wasn’t completely sure if it would work. This one does work.
As I am drained in my thoughts, the floor starts to shake again. I run fast.
The walls are moving closer.
One time they just moved direction, but this time they are pressing towards each other.
My feet run fast. The wall makes the sound of an earthquake as I hold the urge to press my hands on my ears.
My heart is pounding with every step that I take.
Adrenaline roars through me as I run between the two walls.
They are pretty long.
Like a long hallway.
Walls come closer to me and my breath pitches, sweat trickling all over me.
The walls are so close that I can touch them if I reach my arms out.
The end of the wall is at least ten feet away.
The walls move fast.
But I can move faster.
My legs sprint through them, each step feeling like one too much.
The walls collapse and form a new line.
I am out.
I bow forward, trying to catch my breath. My lungs are squeaking, and I pull the baby hairs out of my sweaty face.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Repeat.
Panic crashes into me.
I hate small rooms.
My sight is blurry, but I reach for the one good thing that I have. My hand reached for my necklace. Thumb pressing on the sharp points of the sun medallion. I release a droplet of blood, I close my eyes and let a good memory wash over me.
One I didn’t remember.
Most of the memories are with Da, but this one is not. This one is with Braxton. In the healer’s room. I feel myself catch my breath as I relive the moment and tension between us that day. Another memory of Braxton passes by.
Him brushing my hair away after I burned out.
Tingles fill my stomach.
Not magic but fast chattering butterflies.
A smile appears on my face and I open my walls for Braxton.
He gets the hint because before I know a cloud enters the beautiful forest of Koteld.
“Are you okay?” his voice asks and I can feel him frown.
I look over my shoulder, my eyes tracking the now new collided wall.
“I am fine,” I squeak out, still out of breath.
I can literally feel him lift his brow, wanting to argue, but he keeps his mouth shut. As he should.
I am still hanging forwards, holding onto my knees as something else hits me like a bombshell.
What the fuck happened with Hazel’s body?
“Braxton,” I blur out. “When Hazel died, did you see where her body went?”
He swallows and as he does, I start to realize how bad of a person I am for not thinking about that earlier. For caring earlier. Her parents told me she died as a lie to keep her safe. Now, they have really lost her. Shame rises in my chest.
“You are not a bad person,” Braxton argues. I swallow hard, trying to push away the upcoming tears. He can tell me that, but I still feel like I am.
I have never looked for her.
And I haven’t even tried to do something for her funeral.
All I did was be busy with myself and I hate myself for it.
I hate Annie for putting us in that nightmare.
I hate Hazel and my parents for their lies.
I hate that fucking torturer.
I hate myself.
And most of all, I hate the king.
Rage bubbles in me.
How dare they. The king is the reason I am in this. I never had the chance to live. The reason I didn’t know about Hazel.
Even the reason to think about a fucking funeral for her when she died.
Before I can react out of my anger, Braxton tells me something that quiets my mind.
“I took care of her funeral.”
I repeat the words.
I took care of her funeral.
“Wait, what?” I sob out, trying to make sense of the words he just spoke.
“I knew you wouldn’t want her to be, you know, being taken care of the way the king does that with most people.
” He shrugs like it is nothing. “So when you left me with Zephron I talked it through with him. He invited her parents to the palace at night.” He coughs, the words going softer with every word he says.
“They buried her in our garden.”
“Where?” I whisper, my throat too thick almost making it impossible to swallow.
“Under the pink prunus tree.”
The words leave his mouth in a stutter.
Right where she belongs. In nature. A tear rolls over my cheek.
“Thank you, you didn’t have to do that,” I whisper, my words vulnerable almost breaking. I close my eyes, imagining her being buried while my parents watched, standing next to Zephron.
“I know that is what you would have wanted, what Zephron would have wanted for her,” he breathes out.
My heart grows as I take in his words. He did it for his brother and me.
And that confirms one thing for me.
He cares for others and is definitely not the monster he wants everybody to think he is. And for that I am thankful.
He cares.