51. Chapter 51
Chapter 51
TEAGAN
Istare down at the journal in my hands, stunned.
I’d just been trying to find my keys so I could hunt Lane down at work and talk to her, when she appeared in my dorm room.
Shocked doesn’t begin to describe how I felt when I saw her standing here, looking every bit as incredible as I remembered, and it took everything inside me not to take her in my arms, to erase everything that happened.
But I needed to hear her out. I had no idea how things were going to work out between us, but I owed it to myself to see if what we had could be mended.
I blink down at the book, heavy in my hands.
She didn’t lie to protect Chance.
Hell, she didn’t even lie for herself.
She lied to give her father his dream.
Coach Turner doesn’t strike me as the type to turn a blind eye. Coaching the father of your grandchild, knowing he wanted nothing to do with her or your daughter would be a hard pill to swallow, and I have no doubt he wouldn’t have done it.
I crack the journal open and start reading the first entry Lane marked with a ribbon. It’s from the day she discovered she was pregnant.
I quickly skim the entry, then pause and lift my head.
By giving me this journal, Lane basically handed me a window to her soul.
If she’d been guarded like Fort Knox before, this is the equivalent to throwing a hand grenade at all her walls and watching them fall at once.
This journal reveals her inner belly, leaving her exposed and vulnerable. And she’d given it to me freely, consequences be damned because she loves me, because the thought of losing me and what we have is worse than the thought of rejection.
Are you really ready to lose her?
I swallow, snapping the journal shut as Graham’s words dance in my head.
What the hell am I waiting for?
I hurry down the hallway, cursing my back the entire way. I can’t even run without the constant stab of a knife in my fucking spine.
The elevator opens immediately and I thank God for small favors as I get on and furiously press the button to close the doors.
Once they slide open again, revealing the first-floor lobby, I amble out, pushing my way through the heavy-ass glass and oak doors that shoot lightning into my spine and step outside into the cool autumn air.
My gaze makes quick work of the parking lot, zeroing in on the flash of auburn, and the hand gripping my chest releases its hold.
“Lane!” I yell, but she doesn’t turn. I start for the parking lot, closing in on her when she pauses by her car and gritting my teeth the entire way.
Even from here, I can see her profile, make out the silvery track marks from her tears that tug on my heart.
“Lane,” I try again and this time, she turns, her blue eyes wide as she looks at me.
“Teagan?” She swipes at her cheeks as if she can hide the evidence.
“Damn,” I say slightly out of breath. “Don’t you know I have a broken back? Where’s the fire?”
She blinks at me, mouth parting as if she doesn’t know how to take me. “Oh. I, uh—”
“Relax, Lane. I’m joking,” I say with a smile.
The stiff set of her shoulders loosens. “Oh.”
She fiddles with her hands out in front of her, clearly nervous, as the scent of her floral perfume hits my nose, beckoning me closer.
I stop just feet away. She’s all pouty lips, soft curves, and smooth skin, and I want nothing more than to crush my mouth to hers. Claim her in all the ways I couldn’t before, because even when we were together, there was always a little piece of her holding back. This secret between us.
But now . . .
She’s offering all of herself to me. Her past mistakes, hopes, dreams, and all her inner thoughts and vulnerabilities. And I don’t want to waste another fucking moment.
I reach out, a hiss of pain escaping my parted lips as I cup my hand beneath her head.
“Teagan, your back . . .” Lane’s eyes widen with concern.
I bite back a groan. “Fuck. Sorry. This was a lot sexier in my head. You’ll have to work with me here.” I inhale, relieved when it’s pain free. “I’m going to lean in slow as fuck to kiss you, but imagine me completely destroying you with my mouth in an alpha move that makes your head spin instead, okay?”
Lane nods, throat bobbing, lashes fluttering. “Oh, yeah, okay.”
I grin and lean in, the anticipation killing me in the moments before my lips brush over hers.
The kiss is feather soft, sweet. It’s full of promise and love and everything fucking in-between, and when I finally pull away, our eyes lock, and it’s like a riptide pulling me away from shore, lost in all that blue.
“So, what does this mean?” Her gaze shifts nervously.
“It means that I still love you, Lane. I never stopped, and I’m sure as fuck not going to stop now.”
She sighs, closing her eyes and pressing her forehead to mine. “I thought I lost you. And I screwed everything up. Your back, football—”
“My back will mend.” I press a kiss to the top of her head. “And it’s not your fault I got hurt. It’s football. It happens. I might have been distracted, but it was my job to tell Coach I wasn’t fit to play, and I didn’t. And as for football . . .” I brush her cheek with my thumb. “Yeah, it’s gonna be fucking weird not playing, but football was never my endgame. You are.”
She reaches up, placing a hand over mine as a soft whimper escapes her lips. “But you haven’t even read the journal yet. Are you sure?”
“Oh, I’m gonna read the journal,” I say as I pull back. “I have every intention of doing so the second I head back into my room.” I brush the hair from her face and her cheeks flush. “But I don’t need to read it to know what I have, because I’m holding something fucking precious in my arms, and I’m not about to let it go.”
“But I lied.”
I nod. “You had your reasons, and though I wish you hadn’t, you laid them all out for me on a silver platter, and they’re reasons I can live with, ones I can understand. My family means a lot to me, too, and I don’t know . . .” I shrug. “If I had been in your shoes, I might have done the same.”
She slides her hands down to the collar of my shirt and grips it like a lifeline. “I can’t believe I get to keep you,” she says, her voice thick.
“Believe it, Lane Turner.” I brush a soft peck on her forehead. “You were right. I did tell you someday I would make you see your worth. But I’ve always seen it. And I’ve been yours since the moment I met you. You just didn’t know it yet.”