Chapter 13
Cordelia
My phone rings, and I step back from Sebastian, though it’s nearly impossible, but I cannot look away from him. Answering the phone while I’m still emotionally entangled with him is stupid, but it’s a wall, a go-slow sign, and I jump on it.
“Sofia, what’s wrong?” I murmur, blushing as I realise I’m one short step away from doing something with her brother. Not the call I should have taken.
“Gale has brought Imogen to my shop and is refusing to move.” Sofia starts laughing, while Sebastian growls. Her laughter cuts off, and she goes alert. “Is this a bad time?”
Yes. And no, I want to say, but Sebastian is right there.
I close my eyes. Stubborn pain in the butt horse. He has the worst timing. I move further away from Sebastian, finally tearing my gaze off him and focusing on my best friend and the problem at hand.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
I hang up and look at this alpha who is holding my hopes, dreams, and sanity. “I have to go.”
He scraps his hand through his hair and bobs his head. “Let me walk you.”
I should protest; I should tell him no, but I can’t. The warmth of his offer spreads through me like a creeper, blooming with flowers that warm parts of me I’ve long since buried.
Katsu and Fox are in the shower, but Sebastian goes in and lets them know where we’re going. I wait near the front door, unsure whether I should stay and wait for the alphas or go in and say thank you…for the display? Oh, no, that would be awful.
I’m not sure what their thinking is, but they don’t join us. I almost ask why, but then I realise Sebastian wants this. Like a reprieve to gather our thoughts. A moment for me to think, to catch my breath…I just want to kiss him again.
I kissed Bas. The thought explodes into my mind, and I giggle.
“You okay?”
I grin at him. “I’m great, really, really great.”
After a minute of walking, his hand brushes mine. I smile, though I try to hide it and turn my hand so the next time his arm brushes past mine, our hands catch and join.
What is he thinking? What am I doing? Am I going to regret this tomorrow? Oh, he’s talking. Crap. What did he say?
“Sorry?”
He smiles, a flash of those white teeth that gives me butterflies. “I asked if you wanted Katsu and Fox to help with your heat. If you are comfortable with them.”
“I haven’t asked you yet,” I tease.
“Oh, I’ll be there. I’d kill anyone who tried to touch you.” The complete, raw honesty catches me by surprise.
We’ve stopped walking, and we’re standing in the middle of the road. A car toots behind us, but I can’t look away.
“You would?”
“I would.”
“But not Katsu or Fox?”
“No, not them.”
That warm liquid distinction settles a fragile part that was shaking inside of me.
“Okay, then, yes.”
He puts a hand on my lower back and guides me to the side of the road.
We get to Main Street, and I expect him to pull away, but he doesn’t. He stays so close we’re almost touching with my hand wrapped in his.
He might be ignoring all the eyes and whispers, but I can’t help but notice. I feel like I’m the goldfish in a glass bowl, swimming in circles while the town inspects every little flick of my tail.
“Ignore them. They will whisper and giggle and say how they were right all along, and then they will get bored and find someone else to be fascinated with.”
“How many years do you think that will take?”
We both laugh and that dispels a whole lot of my unease.
It doesn’t take long to get to the bookstore, and when we enter, Sofia is scowling fiercely at the massive alpha that keeps getting paired with Asher.
Zaire. He’s huge and very aggressive. The anger rolling off him has Sebastian moving protectively between us, a low rumble in his chest.
“Just one book. Please,” he growls.
Sofia slides him the book. She doesn’t smile, just watches him with barely contained hostility.
He pays for it and turns, spotting us.
“You stood up my little sister,” Sebastian snaps. Zaire’s scent lashes out, strong and unpleasant; I gag and back up.
The alpha tries to get past, but Sebastian puts a hand out and steps into his path.
“She waited for you.”
“She told me not to come,” Zaire says again in that deep growl. His temper spikes, and that deep scent that is overpowering and potent turns cold. He calms himself and closes his eyes before opening them and pulling his scent in. “Ask her.”
“Sebastian, let him go,” I murmur.
Sebastian looks at me, and his anger slips; he allows me to pull him to the side, and we watch the massive alpha disappear.
I turn to Sofia, only to find her already on the phone.
“Did you forget to mention that you told Zaire not to come?”
“Let’s go find Gale. I am not getting involved in this,” I say to Sebastian, then pause, remembering he’s Asher and Sofia’s older brother. Maybe he’s obligated to get involved.
“Nope, I know what you are thinking, and this is an omega problem. I have done my brotherly duty. The alpha got growls, my obligation ends there.”
I snort. “Chicken.”
“Damn straight, do you know how loud Mum is going to start shouting when she finds out that Asher told Zaire not to come?”
I shudder. “Good point, let’s run far away.”
We wave at Sofia, who makes rude hand gestures at us, and slip out of the store.
“Now, where would we find your naughty horse?”
“Where? Wherever Fox is.”
Sebastian pulls out his phone and holds it to his ear. “Where are you? Ah, is the horse with you? Right, we will be there in a few minutes.”
“Gale found Fox, didn’t he?”
“Yes, they went to get something to eat, and your horse tried to follow him into the cafe, so Mum banished Fox to the beach.”
I shake my head, muttering. “How does he keep getting out? Can you look at it for me?”
“Me?”
“Yes, you are a male. You have male thought processes, perhaps you can figure it out.”
He’s still chuckling as we get to the beach. I hop over the wooden fence and take the hidden path through the dunes to the beach. As soon as we step out, I stop, watching the ridiculousness that is my life.
Gale, Fox, and Imogen are chasing each other through the surf with a black and white magpie soaring overhead.
We walk down slowly, and I fling myself into the sand beside Katsu, who passes me a bottle of water and a roll.
“You bought me lunch?” No one buys me lunch.
I’m the one who organises food and drinks.
Except for Sebastian, he often drops food off to me.
In fact, now that I think about it, he’s always picking fights over me spending too long in the sun, not drinking enough, not sleeping enough, or working too hard.
It’s like my entire world has turned upside down. I stare at him, remembering a million moments of me thinking he hates me. All this time, he’s been taking care of me.
“I bought you both lunch,” Katsu says and leans back, contentedly watching Fox and Imogen play with my horse. “We thought maybe you would both run away, and we’d never see you again.”
I choke on the roll and have to open the water and drink a quarter of it before I can stop coughing.
“What she means to say is that it was very hot and your audition went very well. Ten out of ten, and a rubber stamp of approval,” Sebastian says with a teasing smirk. “We would like to invite you to progress to the next stage.”
I slap his thigh, but he just captures my hand, drops a kiss on my palm, and returns to eating.
“So, are you saying you’d like to do that with us?” Katsu asks in a low and intimate voice.
My mouth goes dry, and I set the roll aside. “Um, er. Well, yes, but-”
“But?” Katsu asks gently. “You can tell me anything. We’ll respect anything you want to do, anything you don’t want to do. If you have questions, this is a safe place to ask them. We just want you to be happy.”
I stare at the sand, my cheeks burning. “I haven’t done anything before.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Katsu glance at Sebastian and back at me. He doesn’t understand. “Okay.”
“Like, nothing.”
There’s a brief pause before the air around me turns to wildfire. Spices and incense and a hot, dry heat that makes me shiver.
“You mean you have no experience?” Katsu asks in a perfectly moderated tone.
I jerk my chin up, dragging my hand through the sand, before I get on my knees and face him.
There is no reason for me to be embarrassed.
“I was busy, and I had…” feelings for Sebastian.
I didn’t want anyone else to touch me. It’s a small town; it’s not like there was a lineup of guys to choose from.
I was too loud, too assertive, too weird.
People were interested in everyone else.
“Cordelia Lake, stop thinking,” Sebastian growls. “And stop defending your decision.”
I jerk my head toward him. “How could you possibly know what I’m thinking?”
“I don’t need to know the specifics; I can smell the pain in your scent. Stop it. There’s nothing wrong with waiting, with taking your time to meet a person who makes you feel comfortable.”
“You didn’t wait,” I snarl at him.
Sebastian leans back and closes his eyes.
I get up on my knees, turning towards him. “What? Are you…? But what about all your girlfriends and boyfriends?”
“Nothing ever went past it. It's a small town,” Sebastian says defensively, echoing my earlier thoughts.
“What about Yolanda?” I almost shriek. “You dated her for a year!”
Sebastian scowls. “We were in high school, and it didn’t feel right. For either of us, we were friends.”
“Okay, well that changes things,” Katsu says and lies back in the sand.
“Changes what?” I ask turning towards him. “How does it change things?”
“Well, it means we’ll just go slower, be more careful. We’ll start at the basics and work up to floggers and ballgags.”
Sebastian and I stare at him. He holds his composure for a half a minute and then erupts into a beautiful laugh.
“Just joking.”
“We don’t have time for slow; she’s going to go into her heat in days,” Sebastian says crossly.