Chapter 41
“What? No, of course I don’t want it to be over. I love you, Harvey. I want to be with you. If I hadn’t left, I could still be with you. But I did leave, and I know there’s no way to forgive me.”
“Who said there’s no way to forgive you?”
“You’re looking at me like you don’t even want to talk to me or see me. You’re looking at me like you don’t like me very much.”
“I’m upset with you, Lily. Really upset with you.
Mad, even. Not just for disappearing; I can understand that your mind was in a strange place, and it’s partly my fault for leaving you.
But what I’m mostly mad about is that you didn’t try to contact me.
You didn’t try to let me know that you were all right. ”
She sniffled. “What do we do now?”
“Do you want to be with me, Lily?” he asked.
“Yes, I want to be with you. Do you want to be with me?”
He nodded. “I do.”
What did she do now? He was just standing there. Did he not want to hug her? Did he not want to touch her?
He still seemed so mad. How could she make everything better between them?
An idea came to her, but was she brave enough to go through with it?
She just didn’t know.
So she stood there staring at him. Suddenly something brushed against her back, giving her a shove, and she stumbled forward, right into him. He could have pushed her away. He could have kept his arms at his sides and not caught her, but instead, he wrapped his arms around her and held her steady.
Lily let out a gasp of surprise as she stared up at him.
“Did that steer just shove you against me?” he asked.
“Yeah, that’s Rump Roast. Sometimes he can be a real jerk, like how he’s blocking the driveway, although he’s not as much of a jerk as Chuck Roast.”
“Rump Roast and Chuck Roast?” he asked.
“Yeah, they’re not actually related, so don’t be fooled by their names.”
“I don’t really know what to say to that.”
“Clem has an unusual way of naming her animals. Most of them are dicks too. Especially the rooster. Don’t look him in the eyes. He’ll take it as a challenge. Actually, Chuck Roast does that too. He thinks he’s a bull. He likes to charge at you.”
“Okay, I’m starting to think that I need to get you out of here. The animals sound like they’re all going to attack you.”
“Oh, well. You get used to them after a while.” She stared up at him and then bit her lip. “Harvey, are we going to be okay?”
He grasped hold of her chin, tilting her head back, and then he kissed her. The kiss was hard, and slightly punishing, but it felt like everything she needed. She needed to make amends to him, and this kiss felt like a good start.
When he drew back, he stared down at her, breathing heavily. “We’re going to be okay, because I won’t have it any other way. But you’ll never do anything like this again. Because you are it for me. My everything. And without you, there is nothing. Do you understand that?”
“I think I’m starting to.”
“Good. Anytime you start to doubt it, you come to me. Understand? No one else. Only me.”
Lily nodded. Only him. Because she was it for him.
“I won’t ever do this again. I promise you, I won’t ever do anything like this. I won’t ever leave you again, Harvey. I want to be with you.”
“Good, because you’re going to be with me for the rest of your life.” He hugged her tight.
She let the safety of his embrace surround her.
This was her man. This was her home. She sank into him like she never wanted to leave.
“Fuck, I was so scared. So scared. Not sure I can ever let you leave my sight again, Lily. Thank God you’re all right.”
She hated that she’d caused him so much pain and angst.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
“Shh,” he said. “I know. I know you weren’t thinking properly.”
“Every bad thought in my head just seemed to magnify and take over,” she said. “I just felt so wrong. So wrong for you.”
“Well, you’re not. You’re the best person I know. You’re everything that is right for me, my amazing, wonderful girl.”
He drew her back and kissed her again. This time it was softer, sweeter, and she loved that too, even though she felt like she still needed to make amends.
“I’m glad that Clem called and told you that I was here. I didn’t know how to do it myself, even though I wanted to. I kept picking up my phone and trying to find the words.”
“Well, I’d tell you that next time you’re just to call me. However, there won’t be a next time, will there?”
“No, Sir,” she said with a small smile.
“Now, how do you suppose we’re going to get this steer out of the way so I can get my car up the driveway?”
“Oh, I’m pretty sure we’re not. Rump Roast moves in his own time. Do you want to come meet the rest of them?”
“Rest of them?” he asked.
“Yeah, the rest of the animals,” she said. “I’ll take you on a tour.”
“All right. But first I need another one of these.” And he kissed her again. This kiss felt less like a punishment or reunion and more like their normal kisses.
Then he drew back and gave Rump Roast a slightly wary look. “Sure you don’t want me to make a move? What if I beep the horn and drive closer to him? Surely, he’d move then.”
“No, he’d probably just dig in his heels. Rump Roast is very stubborn. We have to go check on Chuck Roast first because Clem said he’s had a sore stomach. She thinks he’s constipated.”
“How does she know he’s constipated?”
“I honestly have no idea, and I don’t think I want to know. You don’t either. Sometimes it’s best not to ask when it comes to Clem.”
He nodded, and she decided to be brave, sliding her hand into his. Okay, so for most people holding someone else’s hand wouldn’t take much bravery, but she was terrified of being rejected.
However, he didn’t hesitate. He simply took hold of her hand and let her lead him further along the driveway, around Rump Roast, who was still chewing happily on driveway grass.
“Are you home alone?” he asked, sounding concerned.
“Clem’s gone into town to pick up some stuff, and Jaret is somewhere on the ranch.”
He frowned. “And you’re left to look after all the animals?”
“Well, I don’t really have to do much. I just let the pigs out. I wonder where they’ve gone. Pork Chop! Come here, Pork Chop. Crackling!”
“Their names are Pork Chop and Crackling?” he asked.
“Yeah, like I said, Clem has some really unusual names for her animals. Oh, here they come. Hey, Pork Chop. Good mama. This is Pork Chop and her babies, Bacon, Ham Hock, Crackling, and Emma.”
She picked up Crackling as she spoke, and the little pig snuggled into her.
“Emma?” he asked.
“I thought it was weird too, but when you think about it, it’s probably the least weird name out of the lot. This is Crackling. He’s my favorite. Do you think we could take him home with us?”
He blinked down at the pig. “I think that if you really want to, sure. We have a big backyard. I guess we’re allowed to have animals in it. There might be some bylaws about farm animals, though. I’ll have to check it out.”
“We could if we lived at the cabin,” she suggested.
“You want to live at the cabin?” he asked.
She shrugged. “I know it’s probably not possible, but I really want Crackling to come live with us and your house . . . it’s, well, it’s kind of cold. We could redecorate, like you said. But maybe we could live somewhere where Crackling could roam.”
Lily glanced away, wondering if she was being selfish. “I’m sorry. That sounded really ungrateful. Forget I said anything.”
“I will not forget you said it,” he told her.
“You were honest with me, and that’s what I want from you.
I don’t want a Lily who tries to hide what she’s really thinking in order not to offend or upset me.
I want the Lily who tells it to me straight.
You don’t want to live in that house? We won’t live in that house.
I don’t know about living in the cabin, at least not full time.
I don’t want to spend too much time commuting.
But perhaps we can find something else that suits both of us. ”
“Really?” she asked. “Somewhere that we can have Crackling? And maybe some chickens? No roosters or steers, though. However, the sheep are pretty cute.”
He continued to stare at her in shock. “How long have you been staying here for?”
“Five nights now,” she said.
A look of shock filled his face before he frowned. Was something wrong?
“Five nights, huh? You’re like a completely different person.” He reached up and rubbed his thumb over her cheek.
“Oh, what was it? Did I have mud on me?”
“Just a little bit.”
“Is it bad that I’m different now?” she asked.
“No, not bad at all. In fact, your confidence seems to have grown. I can see it in your face. Maybe the way that you came here wasn’t the right way to do it, but it seems that coming here might have been the right thing to do.”
She nodded. “I think that making up with Clem healed something inside me. It doesn’t change what happened, and I know I’m still going to have bad days and nightmares.
I’m not instantly healed or anything, but just being here, helping with the animals and being with my sister, I think it has helped.
But the way I did it, you’re right, it wasn’t the right thing to do.
No matter that I wasn’t really thinking well at the time, it was still wrong. ”
“Enough apologizing about it, baby. We’re going to get past this.”
She hugged him tight until she realized that something was wiggling between them and she stepped back. “Oh my gosh. Sorry, Crackling. I didn’t squish you, did I, buddy?”
She gave him another snuggle before setting him down.
“Are you sure that Clem’s going to let you take him?” he asked.
“I think I can talk her into it. Come on, come meet the guinea pigs and rabbits. Over there are the sheep. And these are the chickens, Nugget, Butter, Satay, Pot Pie, and Teri.”
There was a loud squawk from above them, and she glanced up at the rooster. “That’s Drumstick. Remember what I said, don’t look him in the eyes.”
“Why not?” he asked.
“Apparently, he’s got a habit of pecking out eyeballs.”
He froze. “What?” He drew her against him, burying her face in his chest with his hand over the back of her head to keep her there.
She pushed herself away, but he barely gave her an inch.
“Not really, not really,” she cried.
“You should know better than to joke like that,” he said to her sternly before he slapped her on the ass. “Naughty Lily.”
That slap made her clit throb, and she stared up at him in shock. Maybe she really would like a spanking.
After she showed him around all of the other animals, she took him over to where Chuck Roast was standing in his paddock. He glared at them angrily.
Then he puffed out some air and pawed at the ground.
“Wow, I see what you mean. He really does have some anger issues.”
“Yeah, I suppose the constipation doesn’t help,” she said.
Turning, she glanced over to where Rump Roast had been, only to see that he was gone.
“Ooh, Rump Roast has moved. You should move your car forward so that Clem can get down the driveway when she gets home.”
“All right, I’ll just be a minute.”
“I’m going to go check the house because Piggy Wiggy wasn’t in his cage and she likes to make a home in Jaret’s boots. Which makes Jaret really mad. Mainly because she poops in them. I’ll also make us some coffee.”
“Right. Sure. Are we certain this place is real?”
“Like a fairytale, huh?”
“Sure. That’s exactly what I was thinking,” he said dryly.
She could guess exactly what he’d been thinking.
As he turned away to go get his car, she walked into the house. Immediately, she was grabbed and a hand was placed over her mouth.
What was happening?
Her heart raced in horror and shock.
“Do not make a noise,” a man said in her ear. “If you do, I’m going to shoot that guinea pig.”
She glanced over to see poor Piggy Wiggy. She was trapped in a large bowl on the floor.
“Nod if you understand me. Quiet, or the guinea pig will suffer.”
She nodded. There was no way that she was going to put Piggy Wiggy in danger.
The man dropped his hand and stepped away, moving in front of her. She stared at him in shock. She’d never seen him before in her life.
He had long, dark hair pulled back in a ponytail and a scar that ran down his cheek, giving him a rather scary appearance.
Or maybe it was the fact that he’d just grabbed her and threatened Piggy Wiggy.
Then again, it could also be the fact that he actually was holding a gun which was now pointed straight at Piggy Wiggy.
“You’re going to listen to me, understand?”
Lily nodded, her heart racing. She had to keep Piggy Wiggy safe. Clem loved him.
“You’re going to send your boyfriend away. Make sure that he doesn’t come back. Tell him whatever you have to in order to get him to leave.”
Lily felt her heart break, but she knew that of the two options, the only one she could choose was to send Harvey away. Besides, who was to say that this guy wouldn’t turn his gun on Harvey? He was safer away from them.
“Good. Go do it. And you say anything about me, both the guinea pig and your boyfriend are dead. Got me? I will kill them both and take you.”
She nodded.
“Oh, and Lily, make it believable.”
How did he know her name? Who was he? What did he want with her? Her heart raced. She needed to get herself together. She had to get rid of this asshole before Clem came home. The last thing she wanted to do was put her sister in danger.
But was this guy here to rob the place, or was there another reason?
“I don’t really feel like cleaning up a dead body today, but I will if I have to.”
Right. Sure. Make it believable when she felt sick to her stomach and was shaking like a leaf.
She’d get right onto that. Not a problem.