Twenty-Four Genie
Sienna
Looking around at the empty wine bottles in my kitchen, I wonder which one of them is the fucking genie lamp. At some point during my late-night binge drinking, I must’ve rubbed one of them as I was wishing for Osiris to leave me alone — because he did.
It’s been over two weeks and I haven’t seen him on the Winchester’s porch, haven’t had him pinning me to my car demanding to know where I’m going, haven’t had my phone blow up with text messages. Not a word, not a sound, not a sighting.
And now I want to un-rub the fucking genie wine bottle.
It’s not that I want him back, not really. He still lied his way into my house and my bed, and that’s not something I can forget. I can’t just plaster on a smile, whistle a happy little tune and pretend that’s fine because it’s not.
But... I miss feeling wanted. I’ve had guys who were excited to fuck me before, sure, but Si was a different breed. His desire for me was evident over every inch of his body from the hungry look in his eyes to the way his fingers would curl around my waist like he was trying to reach inside me. The way he always gravitated closer, made me feel like I was the only thing in the world worth paying any attention to. He was so sure about us that nothing I said or did could change his mind.
Until now, apparently. I’ve deleted a dozen message drafts asking where the hell he went, and I’ve stopped myself from going over to the Winchesters’ to ask them. Si is gone and this is what I wanted, isn’t it? I should be happy.
And yet, as I look around my house, I realize for the first time how empty it is. It never felt that way before. I was comfortable here in my little space, not bothered or interrupted by anyone. Not woken up to some blazingly hot guy doing shirtless pushups on my bedroom floor. Not being eaten out of house and home.
It’s just that now I have too much food, sleep too late. It’s too quiet here.
Fuck it. I’m gonna go find out where that son of a bitch went, if for no other reason than to track him down and smack him in the face for upending my life and leaving without getting yelled at enough for it.
David answers the door with a curious but apprehensive expression that I don’t quite understand. “Ahh, Sienna. What can I do for you?”
Read: What the fuck are you doing here?
I don’t know, but I’m here. “Hi. I was wondering if you knew where Osiris went?”
There’s a moment where I don’t think he’s going to tell me anything at all, but he ultimately deflates. “Well, we thought it was best for both of you if he went on home to Idaho.”
Home to Idaho.
Those words don’t really make sense in that order, not for him. What has Idaho held for him but pain and loneliness?
“Oh. That’s good,” I lie, nodding slightly. “He made it there okay? You’ve heard from him?”
A sad expression overtakes his face, and not only his, I see Stephan peek his head in from the hallway before David can respond himself. “He called, yes.” Stephan walks over and puts a hand on his husband’s arm, then leads me over to the porch chairs. “He also asked me to tell him if you ever asked about him. Is this something you’d like to remain between us?”
What a loaded question. If he’s really gone, it’s best we just let it be — but there’s a part of me who can’t do that. He deserves to know that someone out there cared enough to make sure he was safe. “No, that’s okay. You can tell him. I wouldn’t ask you to lie for me.”
Nodding, Stephan makes himself comfortable with a sigh. “I take it he took David’s advice, and didn’t reach out?”
My phone has been completely, utterly silent save for Lydia. “He did. I wouldn’t have known he left at all if I hadn’t noticed he wasn’t outside anymore. I guess I didn’t give him much of an opportunity to say goodbye.”
“He wanted to. He argued with David for hours about the fact that he never wanted you to believe he gave up on you, but ultimately he was convinced this was the only way to stop hurting you. You miss him.”
It isn’t a question, and I no longer feel like I need to deny it since it no longer matters. “In a way. He was a little like a tornado, you know? He came into my life with almost no warning, turned everything upside down, and vanished again before I could catch my breath. You don’t necessarily miss the tornado, but don’t you miss the adrenaline rush just a little once it’s gone?”
He huffs a little in a way that tells me he knows exactly how I feel. “Something tells me this tornado may circle back because he seems far from done with you. Maybe you should call him?”
My stomach twists. I don’t think I’m ready to see him again, not yet. There are still too many what if’s and too much uncertainty for a reunion to go well, because let’s face it — if Osiris comes back, it means he thinks we’re endgame. And he’s not the kind to take no for an answer.
“I think I’ll leave him be,” I say softly. “He left, and he kept his distance. Why dredge it all up again when nothing changed? He still never really told me exactly what happened or why he lied, and I don’t think I can trust him. That’s a dealbreaker for me.”
That sad expression is back on his face, but he isn’t looking at me anymore, he’s staring up at the moon. “Trust is everything. Without trust there is no peace, and with no peace there is no true happiness. How can love live without happiness? Is it even love at that point?”
“I think it is. For centuries, poets, musicians, authors, script writers, they’ve gone on about the tragedy of it all. Shakespeare and Poe aren’t household names because they were happy in love, it was because they understood that in the end, love is... messy and ridiculous, unpredictable and cruel. It twists you up and changes you until you’re not even sure who you are anymore, and then it just leaves.” I pause, taking a moment to blink the tears from my eyes. “But it’s also the only real thing worth living for if you find the right person to get twisted up with. I’m just not sure Osiris Soto is that person for me.”
There’s a small smile on his face as he watches me figure out the fact that I can no longer deny that I’ve undoubtedly and unintentionally fallen in love with a fucking convict. “I wouldn’t count him out yet. That feeling he gave you isn’t one that can be replicated or forced. What would it take for him to earn your trust again?”
Fuck. Fuck me running.
“The truth would be a good start,” I mumble, knowing whatever I let come out of my mouth here is going to make it back to Si before the sun rises again. “And... I don’t know. Is there ever really a roadmap with these things? I don’t have a list of things he needs to do for redemption, I just need to know he’s not going to gaslight me and manipulate me again. It wasn’t a small thing he did.”
“It wasn’t,” he agrees. “He’s a good man, but he’s got a lot to learn. Frankly I’m glad you didn’t let him off the hook easy, but I never thought he should leave. He needed to stay and put in the work.” Stephan sighs. “Men.”
Shaking my head, I take one step down off the porch. “Actually, I think he did himself a favor. I couldn’t think straight with him in my face all the time. These weeks apart have given me space to figure out how I really feel.”
“And?” David prompts. “How’s that?”
Smiling just a little for the first time in days, I back the rest of the way down the stairs. “If he ever comes back, I’ll tell him myself. If he doesn’t... I guess it doesn’t really matter, now does it?”
I give them both a gentle wave as I hit the pavement and head back to my house feeling lighter. Maybe I oughta thank that genie after all.