12. Faith
It was a good thing that Grace kept Jada out for a few hours because once Reed was gone, I fell apart again. For the first few years of her life, I used to wonder what I would do if Reed ever came back into our lives. Eventually, I learned to live without thinking about his return.
Jada had been my number one concern. Being a single mother was a hard job. Thankfully, I had my sisters and Granny to help pick up the slack. By the time my daughter made it home, I had shoved my feelings down and went into mommy mode.
“I think they’re ready!” Jada announced, opening the refrigerator.
“Wait a minute. Don’t try to take them out. I’ll get them. Go get your blanket and pick out some chips for the movie.”
“OK!” she shouted before taking off down the hall.
I swear that girl ran everywhere. I couldn’t ever recall having that much energy. We had been on the move since her aunt brought her home, and she wasn’t showing any signs of slowing down.
For the past couple of hours, Jada and I had been doing everything I could think of to keep me distracted from the inevitable conversation we needed to have.
So far, we had drawn a ton of pictures, planted sunflowers and put them in the windowsill, and now we were impatiently waiting for the Rice Crispy Treats that we’d made to set.
I had about five movies queued up and ready to go. Eventually, I would have to tell her about her dad, but in the moment, I just needed a distraction from the shit show that lay ahead.
My phone rang, dancing across the kitchen counter.
I walked over to pick it up and rolled my eyes when I saw that it was Reed.
We needed to talk, but he was the last person I wanted to talk to right now.
I let the call roll over to voicemail as I walked over to the refrigerator.
I grabbed some of the treats and a couple of bottles of juice for me and Jada to enjoy while we watched whatever movie we decided on.
My phone dinged, alerting me that there was a text message.
I sat down on the couch and opened Reed’s message.
It was a video of him in a bedroom decorated in gray and white, with a giant vase of pink lilies on the dresser. Where the hell was he? He left that room and went to another room that was definitely a little girl’s room.
Everything was pink and frilly. It was adorable. I was surprised when he continued to walk down the hall. The next room must have been his bedroom. It looked more lived in, and to confirm that, he fell over into the bed. He was so freaking sexy.
“You Should Be Here” by D’Angelo and Rafael Saddiq started to play as he turned the camera to his face. I smiled when he sang along with them.
“Let me show you what you’re missing every day. Once I get you, you ain’t never gonna walk away. I got more than just good dick and some money.”
Why were there butterflies in my stomach, and why were they going crazy right now?
It sickened me how adorable Reed was after all this time.
Now that the cat was out of the bag about Jada, I seemed to have automatically softened for him.
Well, the hard dick he gave me had a little bit to do with the act right I seemed to have found, but my baby was the number one reason.
Jada deserved a dad, and Reed deserved to be in her life. I knew I needed to be a grown-up about the situation if I wanted to successfully coparent with him.
“I spent all afternoon setting up bedrooms here for you and Jada. I can’t wait to officially meet her, baby. I need you to understand that I want my family here with me, Faith. You and baby girl can have your own rooms. I just want you here. Please come home.”
The video ended, leaving me speechless. This man was absolutely crazy.
As apprehensive as I was about talking to Jada about her dad, I knew it was long overdue.
If I were being honest, I couldn’t wait for Jada to have a dad.
Seeing how excited he was about having her in his life made me a little more comfortable about introducing them.
I knew Reed wasn’t the type that would wait around for me to decide when he and Jada should meet. I needed to get the talk out of the way while I still had a little control over the situation. Taking a deep breath, I headed to the living room.
Hopefully, my baby wouldn’t hate me by the end of the day. I walked into the living room and found Jada sitting on the couch scrolling through movie options. It didn’t matter what we watched. I’d promised her a movie day, so I knew I was in for a bunch of talking animals, princesses, and singing.
After putting our snacks on the table, I mussed her wild curls as I sat down next to her. It was time for me to wash and braid her hair, but since she was out of school until Monday, I would let it rest for another day.
“First, we should watch this one. My friend at school said it’s funny. It’s about unicorns.”
“Sounds good,” I mumbled, distracted by the task ahead of me.
I didn’t want to dwell on it for so long that I talked myself down about what I had to do. So, after swallowing my pride and the lump forming in my throat, I picked up the remote control and paused the TV.
“Mom,” Jada whined, looking up from the opening credits.
“Just a minute. I need to talk to you about something.”
With big curious eyes just like her dad’s, my baby stared at me waiting for whatever was more important than the unicorn movie that I was almost certain we had already seen before.
“Remember when you asked about your dad?”
Her eyes stretched, and she jumped off the couch and stood to her feet. Her excitement warmed my heart and broke it all at once.
“Yes, is he still really busy?” she asked.
“Actually, he’s not, and he really wants to meet you. He wanted to make sure that was OK with you first.”
“Is he nice? My friend Katy has a nice daddy, but you remember that little girl that I used to play with that had yellow hair? She said her daddy was mean. I don’t want a mean daddy.”
“Don’t you worry about that, Jada. I would never let anybody hurt or be mean to you. You know that, right? Anytime someone treats you in a way that doesn’t feel good, you make sure you let me know. I don’t care who it is.”
“Even Grandma and Auntie Hope?”
“Even Auntie Grace.” I confirmed.
“Well, Auntie Hope wouldn’t give me any ice cream even though Nana said I could have some. She said I had to eat my vegetables first. I don’t like green beans.”
“Since when don’t you like green beans?”
She scrunched her nose like she could still picture the moment. “Grandma put potatoes in her green beans. I like it with bacon like you make it.”
“You have to follow Auntie Hope’s rules about eating if you want treats.”
Jada poked her lip out but quickly recovered from her disappointment. I loved how resilient children were. Hopefully, my baby wouldn’t have any permanent deep-seated trauma from not knowing her father for the first six years of her life.
“I will try to eat them.”
“Good.”
“What about my daddy? I wanna see him. Can he come watch movies with us today? That would be so fun.”
“I’m not sure if he has time today, but I will check and see.”
“Do I look like him? Auntie Grace said I look just like my daddy.”
“Nobody is as adorable as my baby,” I said, tickling her tummy but making a mental note to wring Grace’s neck when I saw her. She was so messy with her short ass.
“What time is he coming?” Jada asked.
“I haven’t asked him yet, baby. I told you it might not be today.”
“Aww man,” she said, pouting again and folding her arms across her chest.
“You don’t even know what time it is now, girl.”
“Yes I do. Twelve and twenty-seven on the clock means it’s twelve twenty-seven o’clock.”
“You’re right,” I said, smiling as I pulled her into my lap.
“So what time is he coming?” she asked again.
“Girl.”
“OK. I need to be patient, right?”
“Yes, ma’am, you do.”
“Well, can we go ahead and watch the movie while we wait for my daddy?”
“I will invite him over, but it will probably be another day when he comes,” I said, shaking my head.
I could already tell this girl was about to “my daddy” me to death. I couldn’t blame her. If my daddy was worth a damn, I would be the same way. I could only pray that Reed wouldn’t let my baby down.