Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
kate
Reclining in my office chair, staring out the high-rise window, I attempt to force myself to stop spiraling about why my boss wants to meet. Why it necessitated a Sunday evening email and text to confirm my availability today. Nothing about that sends out good vibes.
I blow out all the air from my lungs, spinning slowly and contemplating what I’m going to do if I lose my job, because what other reason is there for this impromptu meeting.
While I can’t pinpoint anything I’ve done wrong, I can’t imagine the press about my relationship or my irregular remote work schedule helps.
Facing what seems inevitable, I wore a high-collar shirt to conceal the redness that will likely bloom across my chest, neck, and face when this conversation takes place.
Gotta love how my body likes to show off my emotions for everyone to see.
My phone dings with a meeting reminder. Five minutes until I find out what’s going on with my career and how I deal with the ramifications of it.
I quickly gather my laptop and notebook, begrudgingly marching to the executive conference room at the other end of the thirty-seventh floor.
It’s a few minutes before 9 a.m., so the clacking of my heels is the only sound, making this walk even more eerie.
Great. My boss is already in there. At least he’s alone, and HR isn’t with him…yet.
“Good morning, Frank.” I walk into the room and sit directly across from him at the mahogany conference table.
The rest of the office has a fairly modern appearance, but the old-school meeting room Frank picked for this morning looks like it was built in the eighties or nineties and hasn’t been updated.
It’s the conference room I avoid meeting with clients in because it sends the message that we wouldn’t know a trend if it hit us in the face, when, in reality, it’s quite the opposite.
Our agency is one of the most sought-after for consumer brands, allowing us to work with the most well-known companies in the world—ones I dreamed of working with when I was in college and now talk to almost daily, assuming this meeting doesn’t end up with me unemployed.
“Nice to see you, Kate. We have a lot to cover,” he replies, his face devoid of any emotion.
Super great. I’m sure this is going to go splendidly.
He clears his throat, shuffling through a few papers until he finds the one he’s looking for. “The recent news of your relationship with Chase Elliott has sparked some unforeseen activity for the agency.”
Perfect. Just what I thought.
Fuck my life.
Time to control my face, plaster on a smile, and deeply bury all the unsettling emotions within me.
“I apologize that my personal life is impacting the business. That was never my intent,” I reply solemnly, forcing myself to keep eye contact and not look down, like I desperately want to.
He waves one of his hands at me, dismissing my comment as if it doesn’t matter.
Sitting there calmly in a three-piece suit and coiffed gray hair, sipping on his gourmet coffee, without a care in the world, while he’s about to destroy mine.
All because I fell in love with someone who happens to have a public life.
“The agency is receiving both positive and negative attention for this dalliance of yours.”
Does he know my mom? Who else uses the word dalliance to describe dating someone?
He claps his hands together on the table. “It’s causing quite a distraction for several people. The phones never stop ringing. There was a point last week when our general email inbox couldn’t receive any additional messages because it was so full.”
“I see.” I glance at the shiny conference table and wipe my sweaty palms on my black slacks.
“None of that is ideal. However, we’ve also seen positives.
The influx of CPG brands that want to work with you is through the roof.
We’re getting calls from companies we’ve tried to get in the door for years, demanding to meet with you.
And we have current clients practically begging to have you run their accounts,” he says, clasping and unclasping his hands repeatedly.
What am I supposed to say? This sounds good, but his face looks rather bleak. What does it mean? Why can’t he just get to the point of this meeting? I swear he’s trying to draw it out on purpose. Make me sweat for fun.
“I anticipate you’ve probably seen an influx of other agencies reaching out to you.
Trying to poach your talent,” he says, his eyebrows furrowing and his forehead extremely crinkled.
“You’ve always been a target due to your high work caliber.
I can only imagine how recent news has amped it up even more. ”
I nod. “Several have reached out in the last week. More than normal, but my response is always the same: I’m happy where I’m at,” I reply confidently because it’s the truth, even if he plans on firing me. I enjoy working here and don’t want to leave.
“I’m glad to hear it. We don’t want to lose you, either.
Our goal is to make sure you’re happy and figure out how to best capitalize on your news.
We normally wouldn’t use a team member’s personal life to our advantage, but this case seems a bit different, given its public nature and the resounding outreach occurring as a result.
” He leans back in his chair, pushing on the armrests.
“How do you feel about working with more clients? Or, at least being part of their broader team? It’s unrealistic to expect you to lead efforts on the vast number of companies that want to work with you, but I think we might be able to find a way to incorporate you into the strategy piece of their efforts, so it’s a win-win for everyone. ”
More work for me.
This is one of those times when I should speak up for myself. Tell him no. Or demand a promotion or raise. Not let him take advantage of my good nature, but I’m too skittish to feel comfortable doing that right now.
“I’m happy to be a team player,” I reply smoothly. “I also should mention that numerous brands have reached out with collaboration opportunities on social media. What’s your stance on my involvement with those? I know it’s a gray area.”
“Hmmm.” He cups his chin, stroking his faint stubble. “As long as they’re not direct competitors to our current clients, I see no reason why you can’t. We’re definitely supportive of you building a stronger personal brand.”
Because it helps the agency.
That’s the part he didn’t say out loud. He’s always going to be fine with whatever helps his bottom line.
As much as I feel valued here, this is a business, making me expendable at any time.
Everyone will be supportive of my relationship with Jake as long as it benefits them.
And they’ll be the first to cut bait the moment it doesn’t.
I can’t let myself forget that truth, no matter how they’re acting now.
I nod silently, unsure of what else to say in this situation.
“Okay, that’s all I have. Keep up the good work,” Frank says, tilting his head at me, effectively dismissing me from the room.
Fifteen minutes. I was worried all night about a fifteen-minute conversation when I ended up getting more work dumped on me.
After walking back into my office, I collapse into the chair, spinning around to look at the Chicago skyline, searching for my backbone because it’s clearly not in this building.
It’ll be fine. I can figure out how to handle a heavier workload. Done it before.
It’s the slippery slope between my personal and professional life that’s causing me angst. The inability to separate the two. Being forced to give more of myself at work because of who I’m dating, rather than receiving recognition for my achievements.
Is this what my future looks like? Constantly questioning whether people are in my life because of who I am or because of who I love.