Chapter 2
ANTONIAS
It was well after three in the morning before I made it to my condo just a few blocks away from the office. I could’ve stayed upstairs at Dr. Bell & Associates, but I knew Katrelle would worry if I didn’t show my face.
Walking through the door, I was immediately met with a half-sleeping Katrelle. She was dressed in nothing but a robe, and her hair was piled on top of her head. She opened her arms for me, and sadly, I avoided them and simply kissed her on the cheek.
“I’m about to shower,” I stated.
“You don’t want to talk?” she questioned.
“Not right now,” I replied and continued toward my bedroom. She was right behind me.
“You’ve always been a great communicator, baby. You’ve ignored every single one of my calls and messages. Let’s not allow this situation to get in between us.”
I whirled around on Katrelle and partially glared at her. “The situation happens to be someone I’m really close to. My fuckin’ family!”
She glanced away and blinked a few times. My tone made her tear up. I’d forgotten that she was there too. She, too, could’ve been injured. A part of me should’ve responded a little better. However, I was exhausted and the anger inside me was ready to bubble over.
“I apologize,” Katrelle stated. “I know how close you are to the Bell family. It wasn’t my intention to imply otherwise. I’m just… I just don’t want to be left out if you decide you need someone to talk to.” Concern filled Katrelle’s eyes. For a minute, I felt like shit.
Six months now we’d been together. I hated that getting with her was a complete damn rebound off Bianca’s rejection. Katrelle had been after me for some time, though. As if she waited in the wings for me to wake up and realize she was the one.
Truthfully, Katrelle was beautiful and was everything I desired in a woman.
We’d connected a few times and somehow ended up making plans for our future.
A future I wasn’t so fucking sure about anymore.
Which was crazy because I calculated everything.
My plans were always made knowing there was no way for them to fall apart.
Bianca was showing me some shit about myself that I hated to own up to.
Like the fact that she had me rearranging my whole life to see about hers.
“I’m goin’ to the ranch for a little while,” I announced, causing Katrelle’s eyes to briefly widen.
“Why? I mean…” She attempted to correct herself because she knew I didn’t like people questioning me. “You once told me that you hated that place.”
“For a time, I did,” I replied.
S. S. Estates used to feel like a damn box that was two sizes too small for a growing boy.
At the time, I wasn’t thinking about how much that place had helped me.
I wasn’t thinking about how safe I was out there, or how loved I was out there.
Leaving the farm was all I dreamt about as a kid.
Now here I was, about to run back for the sake of my lady…
Inhaling a deep breath, I had to get my mind right. My lady was standing in front of me looking like a wounded animal. I had to say something.
“I’ll be gone for a few months—”
“Wow,” she quipped, cutting me off. “We were just talking about starting a family and you’re ready to dip on me already.”
Taming my tongue was a chore. However, I needed rest and riling up an argument wasn’t anything I wanted to do right now.
“Katrelle, we have an understanding. One that we both agreed to.”
“It doesn’t look like you’re about to keep your end of our agreement.” She crossed her arms over her breasts and pointedly looked at me. “She’s going to the farm, isn’t she?” Her whispered question was drenched in sadness.
“Nothing’s gon’ change between us.”
“Everything’s going to change,” she emphasized. “Let’s be honest with each other, Antonias. I’d rather you tell me now than find out later. Do you want there to be an us?”
“I have to do this,” I answered a little softer to make the blow less painful.
Katrelle’s humorless smile was quick as tears spilled over from her eyes. “Okay. That’s fair. Even if I don’t understand, I love you enough to let you do what you need to do.”
I grit my back teeth because her saying she loved me should’ve made me want to repeat that shit back. After all, she was my fiancée. The words never slipped from my lips, though. Not ever.
Eventually, Katrelle left the room without saying anything else. I gathered myself some clothes for a shower. As I washed my body, flashbacks of hearing Bianca’s name associated with harm reignited the fuel inside me.
Buried deep inside of Dr. Antonias Suarez was a man who clawed his way from the trenches of mass destruction to make a better life for myself.
Now here it was, niggas wanted to feel the wrath of a man who never knew the love of his biological parents.
That shit was a different type of hurt. A hurt I released whenever I put my hands on somebody.
After showering, I moisturized, dressed, then crawled into the bed.
Noticeably absent was Katrelle. Checking my security feed, I saw that she’d left while I was in the shower.
That was cool with me. I had another woman on my mind and needed some rest anyway.
I’d deal with her whenever I got my mind right.
Two hours later, I was up and changing clothes to head back to the office. Sleep refused to find me, and that was because I didn’t want to sleep until someone’s blood was shed on behalf of Bianca.
I pulled into the parking garage, scanned my badge, then drove to my designated parking spot. Stacy and Russ were at the back entrance waiting for me. I dapped them both, then entered the building.
“And here I thought you’d actually go home and get some sleep,” Dr. Cartright joked as he passed me in the hallway. “She’s as comfortable as you left her,” he added.
Briefly, I spoke to the staff before heading straight to the elevator, to the fourth floor, and to Bianca’s room. I wasn’t surprised to find Judge Bell sitting by her bedside. Minnie was fast asleep on the couch.
Judge Bell took one look at me and shook his head. “Scared the hell outta you, didn’t she?”
I nodded.
He lowly grunted. “You’re like a son to me, Antonias.
Watchin’ you propose to someone who wasn’t Bianca made the father in me angry as hell.
My wife was the one who told me it wasn’t fair for you to wait forever.
” Sighing, he continued, “My baby’s got a long road ahead of her.
If you can’t love all of her, let things be as they are.
If for a second you doubt the decisions you’ve already made, then the man in me implores you to give Bianca another chance to love you. ”
“I hear you.”
“Hm.” He glanced at Bianca, then back at me. “We’ll give you a few minutes with her.”
Judge Bell gathered his sleeping wife, then eased out of the room.
Inhaling deeply, I blew it out, hoping some of the frustration inside me would release.
It didn’t. Next to Bianca’s bed, I leaned down and kissed her forehead.
Leaning back, I took inventory of the way her chest moved up and down on its own.
Inside her chest beat the instrument I wanted for the rest of our lives.
Just six months ago, I was sure I had broken her down only for her to reject me. That was my last time accepting that shit. Now, here I was, about to break one woman’s heart just to open myself up again to the only woman who could ever get those three words to come to mind when I thought of her.
Bianca’s heart wasn’t the only thing I wanted. I wanted everything. For once, I wanted her to see me. I wanted her to see me…and love me.
As daylight approached, I finally forced myself to leave Bianca’s side.
I went upstairs to try and get some sleep.
That shit was fitful as hell. Visions of me losing Bianca dominated every second that my eyes were closed.
If there was ever a time that I knew following my heart was for the best, it was now.
There was no way I could live this life without Bianca by my side.
Whether she liked it or not, I wasn’t going out without a fight. I had to win her heart.
A few hours later, with no sleep, I got right to putting things in motion to move Bianca to the ranch. My first call was to my baby sister, Kwamé.
“This is a surprise,” she said by way of greeting.
“Why? I call you at least once a week.”
“Precisely. This is the third time you’ve called me in seven days. The first time was to tell me you were getting engaged. The second time was to cuss me out for not showing up to your engagement party. And now… What is it? Don’t tell me you’ve already changed your mind.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “What if I have good reason?”
“Bro! Are you serious?”
“Well, was it really a proposal if the people I’ve known my whole life wasn’t there?” I grimaced at the thought. Maybe some part of me knew I was making a mistake by proposing to Katrelle.
“You could’ve invited Mom and Dad.”
“I could’ve, but they’re out of the country doing them.”
“It’s crazy of you to think they wouldn’t have dropped everything to witness their oldest son professing his love to a woman. Even if it wasn’t Bianca. You know they love her.”
“Exactly.” I laughed and so did Kwamé.
“So, what’s this call about?” she asked.
“I need you to come to the farm for a lil’ while.”
For a second, Kwamé said nothing. Then, she nervously chuckled. “Are you going to tell me why?”
“Bianca was shot last night. I’m takin’ her to the farm until she recovers.” I gave Kwamé the rundown of the events of the previous night, even disclosing the difficult shit.
“Adir didn’t call me,” she stated.
“He knows you’ve been on an extended vacation.”
“I’m so sorry for you and her. I know how much she means to you.’
I smiled, then said, “Yes, but I need you. You’re the only crisis counselor I trust to be there for her…and me.”
“You never beg,” she mentioned.
“Never,” I emphasized. “We need you.”
A few clicks passed before she said, “Then, I’ll be there.”
“Thank you,” I replied.
“There’s no need to thank me. See you in a few days, bro.”
I hung up with Kwamé and pushed out a deep breath.
The next few months were going to make or break me.
The grueling days and nights of medical school had nothing on living day in and day out with Bianca.
Either she was going to hate me by the time it was all said and done. Or she was going to love me.
A light tap at my door roused me from blankly staring at the television.
Passing time while Judge Bell and Minnie Bell spent time with Bianca was starting to douse me into a depression I’d never felt before.
If I wasn’t sitting by her side, shit was just dull as fuck.
However, I couldn’t be selfish. So, I retreated to my apartment whenever they entered her room.
I opened the door to find Adir on the other side. He was dressed for war prompting me to ask, “It’s time to move?”
He simply nodded. Within minutes, we were on the elevator headed back to the lobby.
The sun wasn’t out yet, and the early morning hours seemed ominous.
Leaving the staff with strict instructions to keep the place on lockdown, Adir, Adrian, Alli, Noa, and I filed out of the building and to the non-descript black cargo van waiting for us.
Humble rode shotgun while Russ took the wheel.
The four-hour ride brought morning with it.
We pulled into the driveway of a mansion owned by Dr. Cartright.
Percy’s mother welcomed us into her home and took us to a room that was fitted with soundproof walls and several televisions mounted to one wall.
Weapons of every kind were displayed and locked behind glass cases.
Mrs. Charmaine Cartright smiled at us and said, “Everything you need is in here.” She handed Adir a remote. “Stay as long as you need.”
After she left the room, we spent the next few hours going over the layout of the house the Rollins brothers were holed up at. It was in a decent sized neighborhood not too far from downtown Atlanta. By nightfall, we had a plan and wasted no time putting it into action.
Twenty minutes later, we arrived in the Rollins’s neighborhood.
Shit was riddled with people walking the street, hanging in their yards, and loud ass music playing.
Block parties were common in this area no matter what time of day it was and no matter what day of the week it was.
The cacophony of noise was just the backdrop we needed to cloak the hail of bullets we were about to rain on 3410 Hummus Way.
As if the non-descript van was an everyday thing in these parts, nobody paid us any attention.
At the end of the block, the Rollins’s hideout came into view.
“There’s one of ‘em,” Humble pointed out.
Cliff sat on the hood of a familiar black sedan parked in the yard, talking to some of his homies. He took one look at the van, hopped off the car, and pulled his strap. His crew was ready, too.
Smiling, I pulled my ski mask down and jumped out of the van while it was still rolling. Alli took off one way as bullets started flying. Adir went another way, while I had my sights set on Cliff. That hefty muthafucka was fast. However, I almost appreciated this workout.
He aimed over his shoulder and recklessly shot.
As if I wasn’t made of flesh and blood, I kept chasing that nigga.
Aiming, I clipped him on his right calf just to slow him down.
I wasn’t about to keep playing with this nigga.
He collapsed, then rolled on his back and wildly shot, hoping to hit me.
As soon as his gun clicked, signaling that he’d run out of bullets, I approached him.
Inside the open field we were in, I glanced around.
“Fuck y’all want? The safe is in the back room!” He attempted to bargain with me.
I countered calmly, “I’m after yo’ soul, nigga.”
He acted confused. “The fuck for?”
“You hit up that restaurant?”
His eyes widened, then he sputtered. “I was after a rat! What’s it to you?”
“A couple of yo’ bullets touched my people.”
“Shit!” he exclaimed. “Fuck! My fault, nigga!”
I put a bullet through his neck. “Yo’ fault, nigga.”
He gurgled on his own blood as he held his neck. His eyes bugged as he struggled to breathe. I stared him in his eyes until the last breath drained from his body. His body relaxed, giving up all signs of life.
“I got this.” Russ came up behind me and said, “Get back to the van.”
Satisfied that one of the niggas behind Bianca’s shooting was dead, I trekked back through the field and toward the house to find Adir exiting the house’s back door.
“One down,” he stated.
“Two down,” I added.
We bumped fists and headed back to the van. Now to get back to Bianca and figure out how the hell I was going to win this woman’s heart.