51. An old declaration
51
AN OLD DECLARATION
Netta was standing in the hallway watching Doogie holding Claire in his arms. Or perhaps it was the other way round. Whichever it was, it was a very tender moment, and she was caught in the middle of it. She’d just come back over from Frank’s. The girls had told her Doogie and Claire were inside, so she knew they were there. She just hadn’t anticipated walking in on such an intimate moment. Not that she’d actually walked in on them. She was just standing outside their field of vision, observing, not sure whether to announce her arrival or quietly creep away. In the end she didn’t have to do either because Doogie noticed her and pulled away.
‘All right, Net?’ He looked a little guilty in her opinion.
‘Yeah. Just came to say dinner’s nearly ready. Frank’s cooked a curry over at his but we’ll eat it over here so that we’re not leaving Colin alone.’
‘I’ll give him a hand carrying it over.’ He brushed past her as he went out. She caught a whiff of Claire’s perfume on him.
Claire rubbed her arms. Her eyes were wet. ‘Not like him to ask for a hug. He’s just apologised for leaving me and Merrie all those years ago. I think he’s having a mini crisis.’
‘Must be catching.’
She did a little embarrassed laugh. ‘He told me Grace wants to get married. I didn’t say you already told me last week, but he probably guessed.’
‘Sorry we haven’t had time to talk about it properly. It’s been a bit chaotic here, as you can imagine. What do you think?’
‘I think she’s exactly what he needs.’
‘I’ve never met her.’ She knew she sounded indignant, but that was exactly what she was. Why was Grace exactly what Doogie needed and not her? Why had Claire, her oldest friend, never said that Netta was exactly what he needed?
Claire was watching her carefully. ‘What do you think?’
‘If he’s going to do it, he should just get on with it and stop running away.’
‘Net. Are we good, you and me?’ Claire had seen right through her.
‘Of course we are.’
‘Because I wouldn’t want you to think there was something going on with me and Doogie.’
‘Never crossed my mind.’
‘We’re just mates. You know that, yeah? That’s what we are, you, me and Doogie. Mates.’
‘Always. It was just a bit awkward, walking in on you.’
‘Awkward? Don’t be a nob.’ Claire squeezed her into a hug. ‘If Doogie walks in on us right now, are you gonna think it’s awkward?’
Netta pushed herself back. ‘Well, obviously. Because knowing Doogie, he’d probably be having rude fantasies about the three of us in bed together.’
Claire roared with laughter. ‘Fair point. I wouldn’t put it past him.’
They’d finished off Frank’s curry. Liza had taken Merrie into town. Somehow, they’d started talking about their old university days. Frank was next to Netta on the sofa, laughing at the things they got up to. He was indulging them, and she loved him for it.
‘Where’s that box of stuff you had from those days,’ he said. ‘There are some top photos of you three in there.’
‘Oh it’s in the loft. Colin brought my old photos and records over from his house ages ago. You won’t want to see them,’ said Netta.
Doogie and Claire stated chanting: ‘Get them, get them.’
Frank pulled her up. ‘Come on, I’ll help you.’
They climbed the ladder up through the hatch. The sun hadn’t gone down yet and a shaft of bright light was coming from the small window in the roof. It was more of an attic really. In times gone by, when the house and the area was a bit more grand, it had been the housekeeper’s room. Since then, the staircase that led up to it had been replaced with a ladder and it had become a loft. When Netta had first moved into the house, the room had been full to the brim with decades of memorabilia. It was quite empty now, except for half a dozen boxes.
Frank sat down on a box and looked around. ‘I still say this room would make a great studio if you put a couple more windows in.’
‘Nice idea but I don’t have the money to do that.’ She scanned the room for the box she was searching for, her thoughts still a bit muddled about what she’d seen and heard earlier.
‘You okay?’ he said. ‘You were a bit quiet over dinner.’
She sat back on her knees. ‘Yes. Well, sort of. It’s ridiculous really. I walked in on Claire and Doogie hugging, and it felt a bit weird. I don’t know, it was like it was their thing and I wasn’t a part of it. I mean, I know they obviously had a thing because they have a daughter. It’s just…’
‘You’ve just realised there are things about them that are theirs alone.’
‘I suppose so.’ That was half of it. The other half, the bit about her having a secret strop because Claire didn’t think she was the perfect partner for Doogie, was not so easy to explain. Or admit. Which is why she was keeping it to herself.
‘You’ll get used to it. Just don’t go off and behave like an arse in the meantime. That can get you into all sorts of trouble.’
He understood. Of course he did. He’d been going through the same thing himself. She’d just been too preoccupied to pick up on it. ‘Oh Frank, I’m sorry. I didn’t think.’
He kissed her. ‘I still think you should convert this room into a studio.’
She slipped her hand around the back of his neck and kissed him. ‘Maybe when I have some money. By the way, you’re sitting on my box.’
‘Oh my God, will you just look at us. What did we look like?’ screamed Claire. ‘Net, you’re doing your signature pout in this one.’
‘I think you look pretty good. You should see my old university photos,’ said Frank.
‘All right, bud.’ Doogie was addressing the doorway.
Netta had her back to it. She turned to see Colin with the tray she’d taken his dinner up on earlier. ‘Sorry, I just brought my empties down.’
Doogie got up and took the tray off him. ‘I’ll take it. Come and join us.’
‘I don’t want to intrude.’ He cut a pathetic figure in Will’s track pants and T-shirt. They were hanging off him. Good job he was seeing a doctor tomorrow.
‘Park your arse down there.’ Claire pointed to the armchair Doogie had just left.
‘We’re looking at the stuff you brought over from yours,’ explained Netta.
Claire pulled out a record. It was a single. ‘Close to Me’. Netta had known which one it was as soon as Claire began to read the writing on the sleeve. ‘Netta. Our first dance together.’
It was obvious she’d already reached the bottom of the message, even though she hadn’t read it out. ‘That’s sweet.’ She slipped the record back in the box and picked up another one. Claire had always loathed Colin but it seemed even she didn’t have the heart to put the boot in anymore.
Colin accepted a beer from Doogie and was putting on a good show, but she could sense him faltering. He met her gaze and in her mind’s eye, she saw the rest of the message without needing to look at the sleeve:
Love you always,
Colin xxxx