Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
QUINN
My eyes open before my alarm has a chance to go off. I’m curled on my side, clutching a spare pillow against my chest. Miles is right behind me, his hand draped over my midsection as he holds me close to his heart.
I want to close my eyes and go back to yesterday or the day before, maybe even the week before. Back to when I wasn’t suddenly leaving.
The timing, though, after our conversation last night is fitting.
If I stay any longer, I’m not sure what may or may not develop between us. I’m afraid we’d make it so terrible to be around each other that every time I come back to Lovers, we’ll avoid the other all over again.
I don’t want to go back to that.
I also don’t know what’s going to happen when I do come back. Will we have to face these feelings all over again? Will we just have fling after fling?
I don’t want that either.
I know I’d grow more attached with each visit. So leaving as soon as possible is what’s best right now, and the email from my agent in the middle of the night asking me to leave today is a sign that it’s time for me to go.
“I know you’re awake,” Miles whispers behind me and presses a soft kiss to my shoulder.
I roll over to face him.
I have to tell him.
Miles thinks we have a few more days, but Tobias and Natalie will be here in a couple of hours to drive me to the airport in Wind Valley.
“I am.”
“What should we do today?” he asks, his hand coming to the side of my face as he leans forward. He tries to kiss me, but I turn my head.
I swear to god, it’s like I slapped him.
He leans back, his eyes boring into mine.
He knows what I’m about to say.
“You’re leaving today, aren’t you?”
I nod, and then my tears are uncontrollable.
He huffs and gets out of bed, jerking his sweats on. Then he walks to the closet for a shirt and puts it on, Shadow runs around his feet ready to be let out.
“Do you want breakfast?”
“That’s it?” I ask and wipe the tears off my cheeks. “Do I want breakfast?”
“What do you want me to say, Quinn?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, neither do it. Which is why I’m going to go downstairs and just … just … fuck.”
He storms out of the room. I hear every heavy step as he retreats down the stairs.
I quickly get out of bed.
I knew he’d be upset, but after last night, I thought maybe he’d be a little happy to have this whole thing behind us so that we can both move on.
I race down the stairs behind him.
“Miles.” I come up behind him. His head is hanging over the counter, his arms out wide as if they are the only thing holding him up.
I wrap my arms around him and kiss the back of his shoulder.
“You can’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“This,” he says and moves away from my touch. “The moment you walk out that door, it’s over. You’re gone. That’s it for us. Touching and … and … whatever else doesn’t make sense anymore.”
He’s right. I’d only done it with instinct. He was hurting, and I wanted to be the one to comfort him even though I am the one who caused the pain.
“I’m going to the shop,” he says quickly and walks out the door.
I want to follow behind him and tell him it’s going to be okay, but I don’t know if that’s the truth.
Shadow runs back into the house and pauses at my feet.
It’s like he, too, knows I’m leaving.
I pick him up and kiss his head.
“You better take care of him for me,” I whisper on my way back up the stairs to Miles's room to get ready.
Then I spend the last of my time here packing my things.
Finally, Tobias sends a text that he’s at the door, and I make my way downstairs. Both my brother and Miles are standing in the living room.
Just the sight of him watching me move closer has my heart racing.
“I wasn’t sure you’d come back before I left. ”
Miles shrugs. “Despite everything, I wasn’t about to let you leave without saying goodbye.”
I blink twice, doing my best to keep myself from crying.
I move for my things, but Tobias beats me to them.
“I’ll meet you in the car,” he says, grabbing my bags and walking out the door.
Miles is leaning against the kitchen doorframe, arms crossed and eyes fixed on me.
This vision of him with his jeans, black T-shirt, and backward hat will live rent-free in my mind for the rest of my life.
I just wish there was happiness in the way he looks at me right now instead of pain.
I move to stand in front of him.
Neither of us says a word.
He reaches for me and pulls me into a tight hug, his arms wrapping around me and holding on as if they never want to let go.
His grip tightens just a little in the last time. The small tug right before he tilts my head back to kiss me, as if he can’t control himself when I’m near him, is something I’ll never forget.
He rests his forehead on mine and sucks in a breath.
“I’m going to miss you, Quinny,” he says, gaining a small laugh from me.
This is how I know it’s real love, because when you love the way Miles and I do, we could never let the other one give up their passion.
We could never put them in a position to make that choice.
Before I turn into a blubbering mess, I pull back and give him my best smile.
“I’m going to miss you, too.”
He nods, though I notice the way his throat bobs when he looks away .
I take that as my sign to leave, but when I get to the front door, I can’t help but look back.
He shoots me the smile that won me over, the smile that warms my heart instantly.
“Go make some more memories, all right? I’ll need some good stories when Christmas comes around.”
I don’t think twice about it. I rush to him, wrapping my arms around him and holding him as tightly as I can.
He holds my hand for a quick moment, long enough to squeeze it twice.
I turn quickly and walk away, tears flowing freely down my cheeks.
The sooner I get back to my life, the sooner the pain will go away.
Right?