23. Emerson
Iwas not in the mood to talk to Tilly Monday morning, but she wouldn’t stop trying to call me. I begrudgingly answered the phone after she sent me a scathing text to PICK UP THE DAMN PHONE.
“What?” I barked as soon as I brought the phone to my ear.
“Oh, my Lord, Mary, and Joseph,” Tilly panted like she’d just finished a long run. “Why the hell haven’t you been answering my calls?”
I rolled my eyes as I flipped onto my back and stared up at the ceiling. “I was asleep, like most people,” I lied. Truth was, I slept horribly last night. All I could see was Stone’s dark blue eyes as he told me to leave. I could hear his words as he told me that I shouldn’t have fallen in love with him. I felt the absence of his body as he let me walk away.
It was torture, living with those memories. Move over waterboarding, give me another dose of rejection from Stone, and I’d be spilling my guts to whoever could keep me from feeling that way ever again.
After a night of tossing and turning, I’d called into work to tell them that I was going to be late and spent the morning watching the sunlight slowly seep through my blinds as the sun rose in the sky.
“Well, next time answer when I call.” Tilly sounded a bit more normal now. Hearing her calm down was helping stabilize my emotions as well.
“Sorry,” I murmured, feeling bad for making my best friend so frantic. “What did you need?”
“You’ll never believe the phone call I got this morning.”
My heart started to pound as I moved to sit up. “Who was it?”
She sucked in her breath and paused. I was just about to scold her for yelling at me only to clam up on the most important details, but she spoke before I could.
“Cherry Red Records! They liked what they heard the other night and are coming to The Curfew tonight. They want to talk after your gig!” She was screaming now, but I didn’t care, I was screaming right along with her.
“Are you serious?”
“I’m serious!”
I set my phone down on the mattress and pulled my pillow over my face to scream into it. I pushed my covers off, kicking my feet in the air. It was happening. It was finally happening!
This was just what I needed to hear today after the shitty night I had. And then reality came crashing down around me. Was this just because of my weekend of fame with Stone? Did they only want me because he was part of the package?
My enthusiasm slowly faded as I pulled the pillow off my face and felt for my phone. “Tilly?” I whispered.
She was still cheering, so she took a moment to respond. “Yeah, girl?”
“Do you think they only want me because of Stone?”
“No. I mean, I’m sure it helped, but your socials have been blowing up all weekend. So many people are watching your video channel. It’s crazy!”
“Really?” I put my phone on speaker so I could look. Tilly wasn’t wrong. I’d gained hundreds of thousands of followers overnight. “Oh my…”
“See? They wouldn’t listen to your music if they didn’t think you were good. So, celebrate! You deserve it.”
My smile pulled at the edges of my mouth. I wanted to feel happy, but at the same time, I knew that Tilly was only telling a half-truth. Most of these people were following me because Stone and I made a juicy story. I bet as soon as it got out that we weren’t dating anymore—or that it had all been fake from the beginning—half of those followers would fade away.
Had I crafted this victory by myself, I’d be happy. Now, it came with the memory of Stone, which hurt every time I thought about it. But there was no way I could go back now, so I might as well take the win. Even if it felt like a half-win.
“Thanks, Till.”
She continued on talking about how she couldn’t wait until tonight. She was coming over as soon as I got off work to help me prep. I just nodded along with her. My elation finally settling in my body caused me to feel sleepy. I wanted to shower and get ready for the day.
We said our goodbyes, and I set my phone down on my nightstand. I stood and padded to my bathroom, where I took my time showering and shaving. By the time I got to work, I was only a few minutes late. We were busy throughout the whole shift, so I never really had any downtime to sit and wallow in my thoughts about Stone.
I texted Tilly before I left work, and by the time I walked up the stairs, she was nervously pacing in front of my door. I thought about asking if she’d seen Stone but decided against it. I didn’t want to know. I didn’t need to know, so I just forced a smile and walked up to her.
“I am so freaking excited about tonight,” she squealed as I pulled out my keys and opened my apartment.
I glanced back at her. “Me, too,” I said as I walked inside and left the door open for her to follow me.
“Hayden called me earlier to ask if you had a gig. I’m guessing she wants to pass the information on to Stone, so he can be there.”
I stopped and slowly turned to look at her.
“I thought it was strange ’cause he could just ask you.” She shrugged.
“Did you tell her?” I asked, trying not to sound needy.
Tilly flicked her gaze over to me. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I? This would be the perfect time for him to come. Really help seal the deal.”
I did not need her to say that. That was not what I needed tonight. I couldn’t entertain the thought that my record deal might be compromised because I did something as stupid as confessing my real feelings to my fake boyfriend.
“I’m not sure he’s coming,” I whispered as I quickly headed to the bathroom to shower.
“What did you say?” Tilly asked, following after me.
“Nothing,” I called over my shoulder.
“Emerson King.” She dragged out every syllable of my name. “What did you say?”
I closed my eyes and brought my shoulders up in preparation for her freak-out. “I may have kissed Stone for real last night and told him I love him.” I paused, waiting for her to start screaming at me. I peeked over and saw her standing there, calm as a cucumber.
“Wh—why aren’t you mad?” I asked, relaxing my shoulders and opening my eyes fully.
“I thought you were going to say you broke up with him. Why would I be mad? He’s obviously in love with you… Ooo! This is so much better. You two actually being in love!” She clapped her hands and smiled at me.
My face fell. She didn’t pick up on it right away, but then she did, and slowly her smile faded away.
“What happened?” she asked gently.
Tears pricked my eyes like they did last night. I didn’t want to relive what he said to me, but I couldn’t go on having Tilly think that Stone and I were some love story written in the stars. If she knew what happened, she’d know what to avoid when talking to me.
And I needed that. I was only so strong.
So, I told her everything. I told her about dinner, the ride home, him coming over to my apartment. Understanding passed over her face when she connected the timeline with our texts last night. Her eyes widened when I told her about the ice bath and then the shower. She frowned when I recounted how he went from burning hot to ice cold when he got out of the shower and how he blew me off when I confronted him.
She stood there, her eyebrows drawn together, like she was trying to figure out why Stone had pushed me away like that.
“He’s a commitment-phobe,” she said, shaking her head. “I didn’t think he was the type, but your confession scared him off.”
I widened my eyes.
“Not that it’s your fault. He would have commitment issues no matter what.” She shrugged. “It’s his loss. I mean, he did a good thing getting you some visibility. But, girl, you can take it from here. You don’t need him.” She crossed the space between us and pulled me into a hug. “We’re going all the way to the top.”
I leaned into her hug, letting out the stress that I’d been holding. I was worried she would be upset with me, and it was a relief that she was on my side—and not Stone’s. Although a part of me didn’t believe her assessment—a guy scared of commitment didn’t get a tattoo of the keychain his ex-best friend’s little sister gave him—but I didn’t want to argue about it.
Instead, I wanted to shower and focus on tonight.
I got out of a hot twenty-minute shower to find that Tilly had pulled out half my wardrobe. Thankfully, she was done, having settled on a white one-shouldered bodysuit with a floral skirt and brown chunky belt. She told me to look dressy without looking too dressy.
Not wanting to think about anything I didn’t have to, I just nodded and started doing my makeup. While I was in the process of putting on blush, my phone rang. I glanced over at Tilly. She looked at me. We both asked, “Who is calling?” at the same time. Anyone I knew would just text me.
For a split second, I wondered if it was Stone. But then I pushed that thought from my mind. He didn’t want to talk to me, be with me, or love me. And he wasn’t mean enough to call and remind me almost 24 hours after he’d made that clear.
“It says, Mom,” Tilly said as she held up my phone, which she’d just fished out of my purse.
“What?” I asked, dropping my brush and startling when it clattered on the counter.
“It’s your mom,” she half-whispered, half-mouthed as she held the phone out like it was now diseased.
Butterflies were dive-bombing my stomach as I took the phone from her. It had been months since my mom called. I doubted it was the quarterly check-in she liked to do with me. I had a sinking suspicion that she’d finally received the news about Stone and me. Great.
“Hey, Mom,” I said as I pressed the talk button and brought my phone to my face.
“Emerson” was all she said.
I waited, staring at Tilly, who looked like she was about to explode if I didn’t let her in on our conversation. I pulled my phone away and pressed the speakerphone button. “How’s it going?” I finally asked when I realized that my mother wasn’t going to speak first.
“Not good.” Yeah. She knew.
“Really? Why?”
She sighed. I could picture it now. Mom, sitting on the couch. Her nose tipped into the air. Her eyes closed as she took in a deep breath through her nose to expel it from her mouth so I would know just how disappointed she was. She was so predictable.
“Imagine my surprise when I’m standing in line at the grocery store, and I see my daughter’s face plastered all over a tabloid.”
I covered the phone’s speaker with my hand and stared over at Tilly while I mouthed, “Tabloid?” She nodded, her eyes just as wide as mine felt. Wow. News traveled fast.
“Not only is my daughter there, but holding her hand is Stone Walker. Now, I told myself, that can’t be. That’s not my daughter. She would never date a man who tore her family apart, would she?”
I waited, wondering if her question was rhetorical or if she wanted me to answer.
“Emerson?”
“O-of course not,” I muttered, not really taking a moment to process what she was asking me. I just didn’t want to disappoint her yet again.
“So, perhaps you can explain what is going on in Tennessee.”
I took in a breath and gathered my thoughts. My first instinct was to tell her that I could date whomever I wanted. They might have been able to control Cayden and his future, but I wasn’t interested in them trying to control mine. I did what I could to try to keep the family from breaking apart, but if this was the kind of mothering she thought she could use on me, she was grossly misjudging our relationship.
She and Dad always made it seem like Stone purposely stole Cayden’s scholarship. But, like Tilly claiming that Stone had commitment issues, I just didn’t see it.
My parents weren’t the most honest people in the world. I loved them, but I was starting to wonder if everything they’d told me was the truth. Or if they were so bitter when Stone got the scholarship over Cayden that they needed everyone to cut Stone out of their lives.
If that were true, that would be horrible. My family had been a safe place for him to land. They’d made him promises that they didn’t keep.
But, if I didn’t ease my mom’s mind right now, in this conversation, she was only going to keep calling me, or worse, head over here to confront me face-to-face.
So, I did something that my family seemed to struggle with: I told her the truth. I told her about Tilly’s plan to get me exposure. I told her how Stone was willing to go along with it. How he wanted nothing in return. I made sure she knew that he expected nothing from me. I left out last night’s shower and my confession.
She just listened and offered a “mm-hmm” along the way to let me know that she was still on the line.
“That’s pretty much the story in a nutshell,” I said as I turned back to the vanity to finish dusting blush over my cheeks.
“Well, I’m impressed,” Mom said after a few seconds.
“Impressed? With what?”
“That you did the right thing, using that boy like he used your brother to steal his future.”
Anger brewed in my stomach as I stared at my reflection. How had my mother grown so calloused? “That’s not fair, Mom,” I said as I set my makeup brush down. With how I was feeling, anything I did to my face right now would come out disjointed.
“Not fair? Not fair?” Mom’s voice rose with every word. “What’s not fair is us sinking money and time into your brother’s career only to have Stone rip it away from him. Do you know how much money your father had to pay to get a scout to come out to our small town? Only to lose it all because of one game. And to that boy!”
I shook my head. I wanted honesty, I guess. I just hadn’t realized she would be this honest. “Wait, so you and Dad bribed a scout to come out? And then you blamed Stone when he changed his mind?” I paused. “Does Cayden know about this?”
Mom was so upset she was sputtering. There were curse words intermingled with her explanation, but I wasn’t listening anymore. I was over the past. I was tired of living in Cayden’s shadow. If Mom wanted to talk to someone who would support her conclusions, she should call my dad or Cayden. Not me. Apparently, Cayden knew the whole story but still blamed Stone. My brother was an ass.
My whole family seemed to only want to live in the past but I was ready to focus on my future. And it was waiting for me at The Curfew tonight.
“I’m going to have to let you go, Mom,” I said, raising my voice so she could hear me. “I’ll talk to you later.”
I hung up the phone before she could respond. I set my phone down on the vanity and stared at it as I tried to process what just happened. I knew my family was broken—I just hadn’t realized we were shattered beyond repair.
Tilly appeared behind me in the mirror. She looked concerned. “You okay?”
I nodded. I was tired of crying. And I certainly wasn’t going to cry over my family. Someday, we’d fix what was broken. But I wasn’t going to hold my breath.
It was best for me to just focus on me. I seemed to be the only one who cared. Well, Tilly cared. She always supported me. I smiled at her, and I watched her shoulders visibly relax. “Thanks,” I said. “I’ll be fine.” I picked up my makeup brush. “Let’s get ready so we can get down there and start the rest of my life.”
Tilly’s wide smile was back as she nodded along with my words. “Let’s do it.”