Chapter Twenty-Seven
Rowan
Ican feel the tension slowly leaving Millie as we sit at dinner. When I picked her up she was a ball of nerves. I could tell because she was constantly checking her pulse at the base of her throat.
I tried to ease her nerves as we drove to the restaurant by talking about anything I could think of instead of the impending dinner and her dreams she’s been having.
I won’t lie and say that it didn’t completely freak me out when she first mentioned them. Flashback after flashback of Lily lying on the side of that embankment dying hit me. All I could think about was what if the same thing is happening to Millie?
Is that even possible? I mean the odds would have to be a billion to one, wouldn’t they? Telling myself that over and over was the only way I was able to talk myself off the proverbial cliff.
Then I switched to planning mode. First thing we need to do is talk to Lily to see if she thinks that somehow Millie is having prophetic dreams and go from there.
Distracting Millie was as much for her as it was for me. I’m worried and anxious as hell to figure out where all these things that she’s experiencing are coming from. I, one hundred percent, believe her.
I don’t know how I couldn’t from the level of desperation in her expression earlier today. So here we are, at dinner with my best friend and his girl. I hope like hell we can get some answers for Millie.
We picked a little Italian place that’s close to Luka and my apartment. It’s a small restaurant with delicious food. Second to the diner, it’s our favorite place to eat. Plus, it’s usually pretty quiet in here, making it a great place to talk.
“I’ve been looking forward to this since Luka asked me if we were free!” Lily says with excitement before looking over at Luka and smiling. “I just knew you guys would end up together. You could tell by the way you watched one another when you each thought the other wasn’t looking. So sweet.”
“We aren’t—” Millie starts to answer.
I grab her hand under the table, threading my fingers through hers before interrupting. I can’t bear the thought of hearing her say the words. “We’re still getting to know each other, Lily. Enjoying each other’s company. No need to pressure for more,” I playfully wink to soften my gentle command.
Millie was just starting to relax. I don’t want talk of us in a relationship to ruin that for her.
Luka tilts his head, a silent warning to not be a dick. Don’t plan on it, brother. As long as your girl stays in her lane.
Lily just smiles, taking it all in stride. “Sure, sure. Whatever you say.” She looks at Millie and continues, “We’re all just so happy for him. With how hard last year was and all.” Lily’s smile turns a little sad.
Millie looks from her to me, confused. “What about last year?”
I clear my throat. “About that. That’s part of why we wanted to meet up with you two.”
Luka leans forward, watching carefully.
Lily’s curiosity is officially piqued. “Which part?”
Millie’s hand tightens around mine. I pull our clasped hands into my lap and start drawing soothing circles with my thumb that’s sitting on top of hers. The motion seems to help relax both of us.
“Your dreams.”
My response catches her off guard.
“Oh.”
Luka instantly becomes more guarded, which I don’t blame him for. This is a sore subject to talk about with any of us, but I believe it is a necessary one in order to help Millie. At least I hope it is.
The waitress comes and puts a plate of focaccia in front of us.
Lily grabs a piece of it immediately. “Did you know that focaccia bread predates pizza?”
“Really?” Millie asks.
“Yep, a precursor of sorts. Without focaccia we may have never had pizza dough!” Lily answers.
“And what a shame that would have been,” Millie adds.
“Right?!”
Millie seems to relax even more with their banter and that makes me smile. I want that for her. She deserves to have that kind of friendship with a girl and Lily is one of the best. She’s kind, honest and loyal. Attributes that attracted Luka and would make a great friend for Millie.
Once the waitress is gone Lily leans in, dropping her voice so it doesn’t carry past our table. “What kind of dreams?”
Millie shifts uncomfortably, her mood instantly changing to guarded. I give her hand a reassuring squeeze. “It’s okay, Daredevil.”
Lily smiles sympathetically before saying, “Maybe it would help if I tell you my story first?”
“Oh, no. That’s okay. It sounds pretty personal and I don’t want to intrude like that—”
Lily shakes her head interrupting, “It’s okay. I want to.” Lily’s smile is soft and understanding. “I’ve dreamed of how I would die since I was a little girl.”
Millie softly gasps, surprise written all over her pretty face.
“Sounds crazy I know. For the longest time I didn’t realize that’s what it was until—” She looks over to Luka, an intense wave of emotion passes between the two of them.
“Until she met me,” Luka finishes.
“I thought it was just an overactive imagination. That’s what my parents told me my entire childhood.”
“What was it really?” Millie asks, her voice trembling with apprehension.
“A premonition. My family is cursed. For over four hundred years the women in the family have been haunted by their own deaths until their untimely demise.”
“How can that be?” Millie asks, her voice barely above a whisper.
“Like I said it sounds crazy," Lily responds.
“It’s true though. I was in her dreams, and it wasn’t until she met me that she realized that what she was seeing was her actual death,” Luka says, solemnly.
It’s got to feel surreal to say this out loud.
I know it is to hear it, and I lived part of it with them.
I look over to Millie. Her eyes are wide with disbelief, and her cheeks have gone pale.
Her free hand reaches up to touch her pulse point, her lifeline.
I hate knowing that she’s in distress. I want to fix it all for her, but I can’t.
“We did everything we could think of to figure out a way to stop it but couldn’t.” Lily’s smile dips down, her eyes becoming watery.
Millie shakes her head. “I don’t understand. Does that mean it hasn’t come true yet? Are you going to die?” Panic starts to overtake her. I pull her into my chest and lean down to plant a soft kiss on her head.
“She’s not going to die, baby. It’s a long story but essentially her grandmother took her place.”
“Oh,” she instantly answers with relief. Then she says, “Oh no,” as she watches Lily’s face. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
A single tear tracks down Lily’s face before she quickly wipes it. Luka pulls her into his side, much like I’ve done Millie.
“Thank you, it’s been tough, but I know Grandma May wouldn’t change a thing and that kind of brings me comfort, you know? Like she was at peace with her decision.”
“I can’t imagine. I just— wow. I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything. I know it’s a lot and that’s just the short summary of what is my screwed-up life.”
“Angel,” Luka gently chastises.
“I know, I know. I have so much to be thankful for.” She looks over at Luka and the way her eyes soften I can tell she means him. “But not everyone has to deal with a family omen that has cursed the women in the family generation after generation. I am cursed.”
Luka starts to argue but Lily reaches up and softly lays her hand across his lips to silence him. “It’s okay, I’ve made peace with it but you have to call a spade a spade, babe.”
She doesn’t let him respond before she’s turning back to Millie and asking, “Enough about me. Tell me about your dreams.”
Just then the waitress comes up to take our order. None of us have even looked at the menu but me, Lily and Luka have been here enough to know what we like. While the two across from us are ordering I look over to Millie.
“You know what you want?” I open up the menu in front of us and slide it towards her.
“I don’t know if I’m hungry.”
My eyebrows pull together in concern. I know her nerves are probably going crazy right now and maybe that’s affecting her stomach but I still push for her to eat. “They make a mean lasagna here. The chicken parm is pretty good too,” I say in encouragement.
She doesn’t even look at the menu before looking up at the waitress. The girl must have turned to our side of the table when I wasn’t looking.
“I’ll have whatever he’s having.” Millie looks at me before sliding the menu over to in front of me.
“You sure?” I ask, suddenly nervous I’ll choose something she doesn’t like.
“Yep. I trust you.” She smiles and it’s the first time tonight that it actually reaches her eyes.
“A lasagna and chicken parm.” The waitress jots it down and starts to reach for the menu and I start to have doubts I’ve ordered the right thing. “Can we get an alfredo and side garden salad as well?” There, bases covered.
She smiles before taking the menu and says, “Sure thing,” and heads back towards the kitchen.
“Damn dude, you planning on feeding an army over there?” Luka asks.
My eyes narrow self-consciously. “Shut it. I’m hungry,” I try to play it off.
“I hope you didn’t order all that for me.” Millie laughs and when I don’t immediately respond she says, “You didn’t, did you? I really meant I’ll eat whatever you’re eating.”
I squirm in my seat, uncomfortable with the amount of self-consciousness I’m feeling right now. “I wanted to make sure you have something you like.”
“Rowan,” she quietly sighs. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to and I really am starving so no harm, no foul.” I squeeze her hand once more. She hasn’t tried to pull away this entire time and that has a silly thing called hope budding in my chest. Maybe she can see us as more than friends.
Lily clears her throat, looking between the two of us before settling her gaze back on Millie. “Your dreams?” she prompts.
“Oh—” Millie shakes her head, “It’s nothing like what you’re describing, at least I don’t think so. I get the distinct feeling that the dreams are in the past, not future.”
“What are they about?” Lily leans forward, her forearms on the table, her face a mask of concentration.
I turn my body towards her, just as intrigued. We didn’t get a chance to really talk about the details so I’m more than curious to hear them now.
“Silly things really. It’s always the same two girls, though I’ve seen them at different ages. Best friends from what I can tell.”
“Why do you say they’re silly?” I ask. Earlier she said something about them doing dangerous things so now I’m confused on the description. It’s almost as though she’s trying to downplay it. My gut tells me this isn’t something to ignore or brush off.
Millie’s shoulders go up to her ears in a shrug before she drops them. “Because it’s just two girls playing around. Nothing really ever happens.”
“Does it feel like you’re there with them?”
Millie’s eyes snap over to Lily’s. “How did you know that?”
“Just a hunch.” Lily’s worried eyes dart over to mine before quickly returning to the pretty girl next to me.
“But it’s not like I’m observing. It’s like I’m Lucy.” She swallows thickly before continuing, “I feel all of her emotions, her fear, joy and her affection for her best friend, Anna.”
Luka holds both his hands up as he shakes his head. “Wait, so what are you saying? That you feel like you’re one of the girls in the dreams but it’s just a bunch of mundane stuff they’re doing?”
“Yes, basically.”
“But you said it was dangerous stuff earlier.”
Luka and Lily both sit up straighter at that.
Millie shakes her head. “It’s stupid kid stuff though. Anna is the daredevil of the two, constantly pushing Lucy to do things she doesn’t want to. Things that she thinks might get them in trouble or worse, hurt. The strangest part is that I feel Lucy’s panic as though it’s my own.”
“It’s not uncommon to associate yourself as someone else in dreams. Is there anyway your subconscious is equating this to memories of your past? Maybe it wasn’t you directly but kids that you did know?”
The same thoughts have run through my mind as well but Millie was pretty adamant she didn’t know anyone that fit the bill and that doesn’t explain the voice she heard.
That part is what I’m most uneasy about.
I’m also hoping Lily can shed some light on that as well, having her own experience with hearing someone that wasn’t technically there.
“I didn’t really have friends growing up. Not with—” she looks over to me, a moment of uncertainty flashing across her face.
I tighten my grip on her hand in encouragement.
Lily’s smile is understanding and patient. “Because of your health issues?” she gently prompts.
Millie closes her eyes for one brief moment before opening them. I hate to think I’m the cause for that hesitation but it’s hard not to when I was the last person she told and that didn’t go as great as it should have.
“Yes, I had a heart transplant.”
Luka’s eyes widen with surprise, but Lily simply nods going into doctor mode. “How have you been feeling?”
Millie looks over to me before turning back to Lily. “Great, really. At first it was hard but now I barely even notice it. It is when all of this started though. The dreams, the voice, the sensations. All of it.”
“Voice?” Luka asks, choking for a second before clearing his throat and looking at Lily. I know what he’s thinking because I’m thinking the same thing. There’s no way this could be a coincidence.
“I’ve only heard it call my name. A female voice.”
Lily sits back in the booth, silently assessing the situation before she asks, “Can you tell me about the sensations?”
“It feels like I’m being watched or someone is in the room with me but I’m usually alone.”
“Interesting, very interesting,” Lily says.
Just then the waitress comes and sets the behemoth sized plates in front of us. I’ve forgotten just how big their portions are here. I gulp realizing just how much I’m going to have to put back.
“Wow," Millie says in awe, “It smells delicious.”
“Which one do you want?” I ask, still mentally preparing myself to stuff my face. I ordered too much.
“I’ll take a little of everything. It all looks so good.”
Her answer instantly makes the worry about it being too much food go away. If she’s happy, I’m happy and we can always take leftovers home.
I call the waitress back over and ask for an extra plate. When she brings it back I make quick work of scooping Millie a little bit of everything.
And when she takes that first bite? The moan that escapes her lips? It’s the most delicious sound I’ve ever heard.
It isn’t long before we’re all digging in and enjoying our food, the conversation from earlier on pause for a moment.
That is until Lily asks so casually as though she’s asking Millie if she would like another piece of bread to go with dinner.
“Do you think it could be a ghost you’re hearing?”