Chapter Sixteen
It’s a particularly warm October day today, and the kids know it. Ever since they woke up, they have been begging to go to the beach. While it does sound like a fun new experience for them, the idea of being surrounded by a lot of people has me second-guessing it.
Stepping out onto the back porch, I take a full breath.
This is harder than I thought it would be.
Well, I guess I never thought there would be an after.
I thought leaving would be all there was.
I didn’t think I would ever be able to settle down in a place long enough to relax—or that the charming neighbor would be the main reason I am even able to let my mind take a break.
“You look stressed.” His voice calls out, causing my eyes to pop open.
“The kids are being a bit much this morning. I feel so guilty saying that. For so long, they were quiet more than they were loud, and now that they can be loud, I feel like it is a bit much. How unfair is that?” I ask.
He walks over to my back porch, leaning on the railing next to me.
“It’s okay to feel like they are a bit much. They are kids. If they are being a bit too much, it means they are happy. They have a good life. It is also okay for you to need a break from them. You don’t have to be on all the time. You weren’t meant to do this alone,” he tells me.
“I am, though. I have to. I always have,” I admit softly.
He brushes his hand over my shoulder. “No, you don’t. You have me. The club. Sloane and Kelly. You have plenty of people who would gladly watch them if you need a break.”
I smile. “I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet.”
“That’s okay too,” he tells me.
“Mac!” Emily yells as she opens the door.
“Emily!” he yells back, smiling at her.
I love watching him interact with my children.
“I want to go to the beach, but Mommy won’t let us,” she tells him.
He looks to me.
“There are a lot of people.” I don’t need to say anymore.
“If you are okay with it, I know a place,” he tells me.
I consider it for a moment. He wouldn’t take me anywhere dangerous. I trust him. That’s scary, but I really do trust him.
“We will go get ready then,” I tell him.
He nods. “Meet me next door.”
“Tanner, we are going to the beach!” Emily yells, running to her room.
Tanner yells out his excitement, making me smile. He is more and more like a kid these days. I am grateful for it.
I quickly change into the bathing suit I bought at Walmart the last time we went. It was on clearance, and I knew I would need one eventually. I bought the kids some too. That’s probably why they are insisting on the beach.
After I get dressed, I head into the kitchen and pack snacks and drinks, then I usher the kids out the front door over to Mac’s house. I’m shocked when I see the newer truck with a boat attached to the back.
“Where did you get that?” I ask.
Mac smiles. “The truck has been in my garage. The boat has been in storage. It didn’t take long to go grab it. You ready to go?”
“Yes. I am so excited!” Emily screams, running to the truck.
I follow behind her, stopping at Mac.
“You are too good to be true,” I whisper to him.
He drops a quick kiss on my nose before moving to the back door to help Emily inside. When I glance in the back, I’m surprised to find he has his own seats for the kids. Just another thing he considered.
I’m feeling warm inside as I climb into the passenger seat. For a moment, I let myself believe Mac is their father, and this is a family trip, that this is how our life has always been.
When Mac climbs in, I go to move my hand off the center console, but he grabs it before I can.
I let him hold my hand as he drives us to the boat launch. As he backs the boat in, he explains what he is doing and how he will need my help later. I’m a little nervous but pay close attention.
It doesn’t take long to get the boat in the water and the truck parked. Then we are on the boat.
“Everyone needs a life jacket. Even me. We have to be safe,” I hear Mac telling Emily.
She frowns, but nods. Then he pulls out a pretty pink princess life jacket. There is no way he had that on here, which means he planned for this. He always planned on having us on this boat.
Emily squeals as she gladly puts it on, letting Mac tighten it. Then he has her sit where the captain sits before he moves to Tanner. He hands Tanner a plain-looking one, but I notice that it matches the one Mac grabs for himself. Tanner imitates him, even tightening his when Mac does.
Then Mac is in front of me.
“Everyone needs one, a mhuirnín.”
It’s that term again. The one I haven’t figured out what it means, but I love it.
I turn, holding my arms out. He places the life vest on me, snapping everything in place.
Then he grabs the piece that goes between my legs.
It feels wildly intimate as he buckles it, tightening it so that I can be safe.
Still, the feel of it between my legs has my body wanting to melt into him.
If it weren’t for the kids, I would have.
Stepping back, I clear my throat and go to take a seat at the front.
“Back here, Mama. The water is choppy. It isn’t going to be great sitting up there right now.”
I do as he asks, going closer to the back as he starts the engine. Then we are off.
Emily loves it. She is screaming into the wind as he drives the boat further from land.
It takes at least thirty minutes before a small piece of land comes into view.
He slows down, gesturing to it.
“Your beach with very little people.”
He looks so proud of himself, and he should be.
I stare up at him, wondering how I got so lucky to meet a man like him.
I told him I didn’t want people, and he delivered.
Fuck, I could fall in love with this man, but it’s too soon.
Isn’t it?
As I get us anchored on the sandbar, I hear Jane giving the kids instructions. I smile at it. I love what a good mother she is. It’s one of the many reasons I’ve fallen head over heels for the woman.
Once we are all anchored in, I drop the ladder.
“Okay, there are some house rules,” I tell them all, clapping my hands.
“Listen to Mac,” Jane tells them.
Tanner is giving me all of his attention while Emily looks like she might be thinking about butterflies or dolphins.
“Okay. This isn’t like the pool or a lake.
The Gulf has tides and currents. You need to be extra careful.
So I have these ropes”—I hold them up—“attached to the boat, so if you are in the water, you attach to the boat. You never leave our eyesight. You don’t go out too far.
You ask before you go in, so we know you are in the water.
Do not talk to strangers. If you are hungry, we have a whole thing of snacks and a cooler of drinks here.
Sunscreen every thirty minutes, so no arguments.
No getting on the boat without me or your mom.
If you need a bathroom, we have one inside the boat. Understood?”
“Yes, sir,” Tanner says.
“Okay. I can go play now?” Emily asks.
“After we put sunscreen on,” Jane tells her before turning to me. “I brought snacks and drinks. You didn’t need to.”
“They are always here,” I lie.
The truth is, I had one of the prospects grab it while I fueled up. She doesn’t need to know that, though.
“Oh. That’s good. How do we get down?” Jane asks.
“I’ll go first. You go last so you can hand me anything you want on shore.”
She nods.
I go down the ladder, then motion for Emily to come down.
She squeals when she feels the cool water.
It’s certainly not the warmest today, but it’s not too bad.
I carry her to shore before I go back for Tanner.
He opts to get into the water, shivering as he lets me follow him to shore. Then I’m back for Jane.
“Hand me what you want, then wait for me. Oh, and there are some sand toys in the cubby by the snacks.”
She nods, grabbing a bag and putting some things in it. Then she hands it down to me with the sand toys. I take it to shore, handing it to Tanner before going back for Jane.
“Come on down,” I tell her.
She slowly lowers herself into the water, shivering at the chill. I cage her in between my arms.
“I’ll get you warm again,” I whisper into her ear.
She gasps, turning to look at me.
Without warning, I pick her up bridal style and carry her to the shore without getting her wet. She giggles, making Emily laugh.
When I set her down, she smiles at me.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” I say, clearing my throat.
“Sunscreen time,” Jane says, grabbing it out of the bag Tanner is holding.
She helps the kids get out of their life jackets, then out of the clothing they had over their suits. Both kids hold still while she applies the lotion to their skin. Then she tells them to let it dry for five minutes before going in the water.
When she moves toward me, I tilt my head.
“What are you doing there, Mama?” I ask.
“Well, safety is important. You made me wear a life jacket, so I’m making you wear sunscreen.”
I smile. “By all means.”
I take off my life jacket to make it easier for her. She takes her time rubbing the lotion in. The entire time I am savoring her hands on me, I keep an eye on the kids as well.
“Can we go in now?” Tanner calls.
“Life jackets on and attach to the rope,” I call out.
I watch as he helps his sister get her life jacket on before attaching the rope to her, anchoring her to the boat, then he does the same to himself.
“That was smart,” Jane whispers.
“I’ve seen other parents do it. It keeps them anchored to the boat so they can’t go too far. I don’t see them going too far in, but I would rather be safe,” I tell her.
“I appreciate you thinking about them. Seriously, you are always doing things for us that surprise me.”
I turn to her, grabbing the lotion from her hands as I squirt some on my chest. Her hands immediately go to rubbing it in as she looks up at me.
“I like taking care of all of you. It’s no hardship to make sure you are taken care of,” I tell her.
“It’s not something we are used to,” she admits.
“Then you better get used to it, because it’s not going to stop.”
Her lips twitch as she smiles. “I don’t think I mind it not stopping.”
“Mac, come help me build a castle,” Emily calls out.
“Coming,” I yell before taking some lotion in my hands. “Strip.”
Jane’s eyes flare as she stares at me. Slowly, she takes off her life jacket. Then she takes off her shirt and shorts, leaving her in the least revealing one-piece I have ever seen, but, fuck, she looks gorgeous.
Swallowing hard, I use my finger to indicate she should turn. Then I rub sunscreen on her back. When I’m done, I turn her back around.
“You better do the front.” I glance down at her breasts before looking back at her face.
“Yeah. I should,” she says, breathless.
I hand her the bottle back before I take off at a jog toward the kids. When I glance back, her eyes are still on me.
Fuck, I love that woman.
“Tanner is trying to help, but he doesn’t know how to make one either. We haven’t done it before,” Emily tells me as I approach them.
“Well, the easiest way is to put a little water in the maker, then some sand. Then repeat until it’s packed in. Then you turn it over.” I show her a castle coming out when I flip it.
“Wow, you are magic. Do it again. I want a whole kingdom.”
I laugh. “Anything for the princess. Right, Tanner?”
“I’m the queen,” Emily says, running to the water to get some more.
“You having fun, bud?” I ask.
He looks from his mom to his sister.
“Yeah, I am.”
That has my heart feeling lighter than it has in a while. I’m glad he is having fun and feels comfortable with me.
Today is going to be a good day.