Chapter 34 #2
“I’m out of cigarettes and beer, and I just don’t have the energy to go pick them up. I need you to stop by the store on your way and just drop them off.”
I let Wendy’s words sink in and calmly responded. “That doesn’t work for me.”
“You live here now, so being long-distance is not an excuse that works anymore,” she said, her tone harsh with resentment and attitude.
“Agreed. So, we’ll have to set some new boundaries now that I’m living here full-time.
Running to get you smokes and booze after I worked a full day is not something I have time to do, nor am I willing to pay for them.
I offered to help with your rent, and even though my pay is not as much as it would have been if I’d taken the job at the university, I will stay true to my word and honor our agreement for three months until you pick up more shifts and get on your feet. That is what I have to offer you.”
She was quiet on the other end, and I walked toward the elevators, waving at Jenna as I passed her desk.
“Fine. Then I’ll ask your brothers. Are you fine with putting this on them?” She sounded smug, and it annoyed the hell out of me.
“Sure. They’re grown men. They’ll eventually get sick of it and tell you no. You could also get out of bed and go get it yourself and stop dragging everyone down with you.”
“Right, as if that ever worked with you. You’re so high and mighty with your fancy education and your big job.
You think you’re better than me—” Wendy went on with other insults just like she normally did.
Something about being my mother, respecting my elders, and all the psycho tricks she’d been pulling for years.
A maniacal laugh left my mouth as the elevator doors opened.
“You say it like it’s a negative thing that I’ve worked hard at school and secured a great job for myself.
I’m not engaging in this conversation. You’ve got three months to start paying your own rent.
My offer still stands if you’d like to have dinner next week and catch up.
” I was trying to change the dynamic of our relationship, so it wasn’t me always going over there and helping her.
I wanted to try to have a normal relationship to some extent, but I was going to be okay either way.
I didn’t have any expectations where my mother was concerned.
“I would like that,” she said, surprising me.
“Great. I’m in an elevator, and I’m going to lose the call. I’ll text you tomorrow and we can pick a day to meet. Have a good night.”
“Yeah, you, too,” she said, sounding caught off guard by the conversation.
It hadn’t gotten heated. I hadn’t reacted to any of it, and it felt damn good.
I ended the call and leaned against the wall of the elevator and smiled.
Things were coming together.
My heart wasn’t aching the way it had been the last week, because I knew we were going to figure this out.
I’d make him grovel, but I already knew the outcome.
I missed him terribly.
I loved him.
I wanted to hear him say it. Wanted to hear him apologize, really apologize for being a complete jackass about Dereck.
But I knew he was a good man.
I knew he was the only man who’d ever own my heart, so there was no other option than to fix this.
Because nothing worked without him.
I hurried home and changed into a tank top and a pair of jean shorts before climbing into my kayak.
It was completely dark out by the time I was out on the water, and I had only the moonlight to lead me to the cove.
I could get here in my sleep, though, so it wasn’t a problem. It was even more peaceful at night.
The sound of the birds rustling in the trees above and the light breeze bustling around me calmed me.
It didn’t stop the butterflies fluttering in my belly, though.
I wasn’t fighting it anymore. I’d never been that girl who got all fluttery around a guy. But River Pierce gave me all the flutters.
My Wild River.
Even when I was angry as hell at him, it didn’t matter.
I still loved him.
As I came around the corner, I gasped when I saw the area lit up in little white twinkle lights.
There were lights on the trees and bushes, and I could see River sitting on the shore, his kayak tied to the old, weathered dock there.
I glided through the water, my heart beating so fast it pounded in my ears.
“You came,” he said.
“That’s what she said.” I chuckled because I couldn’t help myself.
He walked toward me, not caring that the bottoms of his jeans were getting soaked as he stepped into the water, and he laughed. He reached for the front of my kayak and tugged it over to the dock, tying it off beside his. He offered me a hand and helped me out.
“How long have you been here?” I asked.
“Pretty much all day. I was setting this up, and I didn’t want to miss you, so I just stayed and waited. Hoping you’d come.” He guided me over to a blanket, and we both sat down. There were a few lanterns with candles.
“You know when I told you to figure your shit out, that didn’t mean that you had to cover my office wall in sticky notes and light up all these trees and bushes. You could have just come and talked to me.”
He rubbed a hand over his jaw and nodded.
“I’m not used to caring this much. I fucked up, and I want to fix it.
I need to fix it. And I was stunned that you’d decided to stay that day I saw you at the barn.
Stunned that I’d been such a fool about the way I’d handled things.
I didn’t know what to say, so I managed to make things worse. ”
“You didn’t make things worse, you just—didn’t make them better.” I shrugged. “You said some awful things. Some pretty unforgivable things.”
“Yep. I was an asshole. I saw that preppy fucker and lost my shit. Jumped to conclusions.” He cleared his throat. “I’m not even sure why I did it except that I was scared. I thought I’d lost you, and—God, I’m sorry, Queenie. I’m so fucking sorry.”
I listened, taking in his words. “I get that. But what does that mean now? We’re both scared, River. That’s not going to change just because I live here now.”
“I’ll tell you what’s changed.” He cleared his throat.
“I love you, Ruby. I love you in a way I never knew I was capable of. And I will fight for you, for us, every fucking day. That’s what’s changed.
I realized these last few days that I was never afraid of loving you.
It was losing you that scared the shit out of me. ”
The lump in my throat was so thick it was difficult to speak. “I love you, and I understand being afraid because I’m afraid, too. But we need to have some ground rules if we want to move forward. If we want this to work.”
“I want that. Tell me your terms,” he said, a wickedly sexy smirk on his handsome face.
“For starters, no more accusations. We’re both straight shooters, so how about we just talk things out?”
He nodded. “I can do that.”
“No more tantrums or meltdowns. If you’re bothered by something, just tell me.”
He shrugged. “Done. What’s next?”
I tried not to laugh because he was so intense and serious at the moment. It took everything I had not to climb into his lap. I’d missed him. Missed everything about him. “No more sticky note communications. If you feel a certain way, just tell me. And I’ll do the same.”
“But that whole wall of sticky notes was impressive as shit, wasn’t it? Even Beefcake was impressed. He asked Nash if he could have a sticky note wall in his bedroom, and he wants notes from all his favorite girls, including you.”
I tipped my head up to look at the moon and chuckled. “He’s six. It makes a lot more sense for a six-year-old to communicate via sticky note.”
“Okay. No more sticky notes. Although you did a fabulous job telling me I was an asshole on the sticky note you sent over with King.”
“It seemed fitting at the time.” I turned my head to look at him, his dark gaze locking with mine.
“Well, I sort of did something drastic because I really wanted to win you back after my lame attempt at an apology the other day. But now I realize I might have fucked up again because you just made this new we-have-to-talk-everything-out rule.”
I cocked my head to the side. “You covered my wall in little yellow papers and lit up this entire area in twinkle lights. What could be more drastic?”
He reached a hand over his shoulder and grabbed a handful of his tee before tugging it over his head. A large bandage covered his chest, and my eyes widened as he peeled it back. The word Queenie was inked there.
“You’re permanently on my heart, because it belongs to you, Ruby. I don’t know how it happened, but I fucking love you. I want you with me always. So, I put you right here, where I can keep you forever.”
My teeth sank into my bottom lip as a tear slipped down my cheek. “We can make an addendum to that rule about having to talk everything through. Ink is different.”
“Yeah? You like it?”
“I like it,” I whispered, pushing up on my knees and gently tracing a finger around the surrounding area. “I love you, River Pierce.”
“Is that so?” His voice was smooth and sexy as he covered his tattoo with the bandage and pulled me against his chest.
I tipped my head up and smiled. “It is.”
“I love you. I’m sorry I fucked everything up. I was going out of my mind. I didn’t want you to leave, and I didn’t know how to say it. How to tell you how I felt. And lashing out at the professor came more naturally to me.”
I laughed as the light breeze moved around us before I mimicked his words back to him. “Is that so?”
“It is.” He pushed the hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Ruby. And I’m probably going to fuck things up a lot, but I’m going to try hard not to.”
“I don’t expect you not to mess up. I’m sure I’ll mess up plenty, too. But we just need to talk about things as they come up.”
“Speaking of things coming up,” he teased, thrusting against me, and I felt just how much he’d missed me.
How much he wanted me.
And I couldn’t remember a time I’d ever been happier or more content.
Right here. Right now.
With this man.