Epilogue
MADELYN - SIX MONTHS LATER
My hands are a bit shaky as I tighten the tie around his collar.
I try to compose myself and brush it off. Deep breaths.
This wasn’t the plan. It wasn’t in my cards, and I need to tell Kayden. I don’t know how, and now’s probably not the best time, so I swallow and let go of the tie.
“There you go.”
“How do I look?” Kayden smiles. His usual laidback, side-parted, tousled hairstyle is now combed backward and fixed with gel. He’s wearing a black suit that accentuates his wide shoulders.
“Like the most handsome man I’ve ever seen.”
His smirk deepens. “Good girl.”
God, he loves it when I stroke his ego.
Kayden’s love language is words of affirmation, and that’s something I’ve gotten to know in the past six months since we’ve officially been together.
Which I don’t mind. If all I need to do is tell my man how good-looking he is and worship his body, then I’ll do it happily. He’s suffered enough for me to deny him anything. And he’s made sure to cross out almost every single one of the fantasies in my diary.
It’s been a delicious journey. I can’t complain.
Blush rises to my cheeks as I think of all the things we’ve done. How the secret I’ve been keeping from him will completely change our worlds, even more than the changes we’ve experienced these past few months. The change we’re accepting today.
The touch startles me, Kayden’s hand on my butt, smacking it, and I gasp, almost losing my balance.
He holds me tight, eyes big. “Are you okay?”
I clear my throat. “Y-yes. Sorry. I was thinking of something and got caught up. Today is just—”
This isn’t the reason why I’ve been so distracted, so unable to focus on us, yet I can’t confess that.
“Yeah.” He pauses. “I know. Let’s go.”
Today’s the end of a chapter. A new beginning. In more ways than one.
Kayden extends his hand toward me, something I’ve grown so used to, an action that’s so natural, I don’t hesitate before pressing my palm against his.
However, he doesn’t step through the doors.
We remain standing still, holding each other’s hands at the entrance of the church.
“Kayden?”
“Hmm?” He tilts his head.
“Are you okay?”
He nods. “Yeah. It’s just—you’re right. This is overwhelming.”
“Take your time, baby.” I spin him so we’re facing each other, and I press my hands to his face. “It’s okay. No one said this would be easy.”
Kayden’s been doing way better with his feelings than me.
I’m still more prone to writing out what I feel rather than saying it.
But ever since we started going to therapy together right after what happened with Devon six months ago, he’s been better at speaking up, and expressing how he feels about everything.
Processing the trauma he’s gone through his whole life.
Today…Today hits a nerve, that’s for sure.
“You can do this,” I reassure him, nodding at him while our eyes are still locked. “You’re the strongest person I know.”
“God.” He sighs, letting out the biggest breath. “You are so fucking inspiring. Look at you, acting like nothing happened and encouraging me this way. You’re the best fiancée ever, you know?”
I gasp at the word fiancée. I still can’t get over the sound of it. I’m a fiancée.
I can’t believe Kayden asked me to marry him a month ago, that our relationship escalated so fast. That we’re about to be a family. A real one.
“Babe.” I caress his face. “It’s okay to break down sometimes. Especially today. He might have been a monster, but he was your father.”
Of course, I’m affected by the fact that Kayden’s father is dead after struggling with a sickness for so long, even if that wasn’t what killed him.
To the untrained eye, Kayden’s father’s cause of death wasn’t anything out of the ordinary.
Undefined, but not rare for the illness he was carrying. It was bound to happen sometime.
We just made it happen sooner rather than later.
So yeah, it isn’t easy to do what we’re doing today. To show up at his funeral and pretend that we are grieving him. It’s harder for Kayden than for me, so I can understand his behavior and the hesitation in his steps.
He wasn’t my father.
Mine is still pretty much alive, and I hope rotting out there somewhere.
I decided to stop thinking about him, to not let him dictate how I live my life. If he wanted out of it, then it’s his loss. I’m not worth less because of his choices.
If there’s something I understand now—it’s that family doesn’t always have to be connected by blood.
Family is who we choose, who makes us feel safe and loved. And Kayden and I chose each other.
“I understand the internal conflict. I just want you to know that I’m here. And I’m walking in there with you.”
He leans forward, his hands wrapping around my hips. He pulls me to him and envelops me in a dangerous kiss. His wet tongue in my mouth making heat slither down my legs and in between my thighs.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.” I stretch my hand his way this time, prompt him to take it, and he gives me a small smile as he does. “Let’s do this.”
***
The service doesn’t take long.
Kayden doesn’t volunteer to talk at the funeral, and my mom doesn’t suggest it. She gives him his space.
Turns out, she knew what a horrible man Lucas, Kayden’s father, was. She had been trapped under his thumb for too long before he got sick, and she didn’t know how to get out. As suspected, she didn’t tell me because she thought she was protecting me.
Yet, for the audience, she pretends to have been a loving wife, in a loving marriage, letting his memory be taintless and hopefully forgotten. My mother is strong, and I know she will move on.
The good news is that now she’s richer than ever before. She had been such an obedient little wife that Kayden’s father actually left her all his money.
Of course, she didn’t tell us this, but rather Russell, Mom’s assistant, did. He sits in the first row just like us, nodding as we get up and prepare to leave the church.
As much as I didn’t like the idea of my mother having another man in the house when I first found out about him, I’m grateful for Russell.
He’s a nice guy, and he told us about the situation behind closed doors, claiming my mother needed help when we showed up at the house a month after Kayden and I officially started dating.
Mom has no idea about our conversation.
Apparently, Russell is so tech-savvy that he, too, helped us research what we needed to make things happen.
His knowledge, plus Kayden’s coding skills, helped us make sure we left no traces behind.
Russell is in love with my mother, despite having a twenty-year age gap.
Mom has no idea about that, either. He wanted to help set her free.
Now, Russell has to sit in the corner, pretending to be mourning a monster just like Kayden and me, unable to reach for the woman he loves and comfort her so as not to raise any suspicions.
But I’m sure he’ll get his shot in a couple of months.
“Kayden, darling.” Mom digs her palm into Kayden’s shoulder as we approach her, standing right by the open casket.
Her blonde bob is hidden under an elegant hat that she’s wearing with a black blazer and long skirt. Her face is paler than usual, her eyes puffy with dried mascara underneath them. To anyone else, she’s playing the perfect part of the mourning wife.
I divert my gaze, not wanting to face the corpse of the man who gave Kayden so much pain.
“Thank you for coming. How are you holding up?”
Kayden adjusts his tie and shrugs. “I’m not sure what I’m feeling to be honest.”
Mom approaches me, wrapping me in a quick hug. “Thank you for being here, Maddy. I know you never liked Lucas.”
“I’m here for you, Mom,” I say, pulling back a bit. “Always.”
“Thank you,” she whispers, her voice faint and fragile, directing the words at both of us.
“You don’t need to thank us for anything, Mom. We’re family. We’ll always be here if you need us.”
“That’s not what I—” Mom pauses. Her tone changes, still low. She clearly doesn’t want anyone to hear us. “Thank you. For everything.”
This time, she gives us a knowing look.
It dawns on me as Kayden and I exchange a look of our own.
She knows. She knows what we did. That this is on us.
She knows, and she isn’t going to tell anyone. That’s how loyal Mom is. Just like when we showed up at their house knowing we’d get a momentary hissing look from Kayden’s father as we confessed to them that we love each other, that we decided to be together. Mom doesn’t judge.
She doesn’t back away when things get hard or are unconventional. She fights and sees them through.
“I don’t think I could have ever done anything on my own.”
“Hush, Mama,” I reassure her. “Like I said, there is nothing to thank us for. This is what’s right. We just made sure to take care of you.”
“You’re angels,” she says. “I’m so glad to have you, and that you have each other.” Mom turns to Kayden. “Take care of Maddy, okay?”
“Of course.” Kayden clears his throat, fixing his suit and digging his hands into his pockets now. “I may be Lucas’s son, but I’m not him. I’m here for the long run. I’ll always cherish your daughter. In fact, while we’re on the topic, I think it’s okay to tell you I’m never letting her go.”
Kayden intertwines his fingers with mine and raises our hands, startling me.
I did not expect him to do that, to give Mom the news like this.
My shiny ring is evident to the naked eye.
My heart races as he says the words. “We’re engaged.”
Mom gasps, a hand flying to her mouth. Tears spring down her face.
“I know it’s a little soon…” I say.
Mom shakes her head. “When you know, you know.”
“Exactly,” Kayden agrees.
“Don’t cry, Mom.” I caress her face, wiping away her tears.
“I’m just—My baby’s getting married.”
And that’s not all. I wish I could tell her the other news I have, but I’m scared this might do more harm than good. I need to let her process at a slower pace, make sure she’s okay with every step we take.
Hell, I need to talk to Kayden first.