17. June
JUNE
Normal night. Absolutely normal, no issues here. No reason to be suspicious.
Rafe works late. I have dinner with Hattie, hang around in the media room with her watching movies, and put her to bed at eight. When she’s asleep, I retreat into the master suite to read until ten, then it’s lights out.
My husband appears around eleven. He’s quiet, but I make sure I don’t pass out. He slips in beside me and goes still, his breathing steady and even, while I force myself to count the hours.
At some point, I open my eyes.
Oh no.
It’s almost two-thirty. I wanted to be up and going by now, but I can’t panic. If I screw this up, Rafe will double the security and I’ll never get out of here.
With my heart racing, I slip out of bed, and pause halfway to the bathroom.
Rafe doesn’t stir.
I’ll say this for my husband. He’s insanely attractive, fucks like a god, and sleeps like the dead.
That’s it for his redeeming qualities though.
I sneak to the closet and find the bag I hid under the pile of clothes. Rafe thinks I threw a tantrum and that’s partially correct. It felt good making a huge mess.
But mostly I wanted to leave this here to keep my go-bag hidden.
Once I dig it out, I put on sneakers, tug on a black sweatshirt and black jeans, and hurry to the bedroom door.
Rafe’s breathing is even and steady.
In the hall, I start to wonder if I can really do this.
Hattie’s room first. She’s dead to the world.
I shake her gently until she grunts and groans, eyelids fluttering.
“Quiet now, baby,” I whisper, lifting her into my arms. God, when did she get so heavy?
! I remember walking around her bedroom rocking and bouncing her until she passed out.
I had a whole dance routine and a song to go with it.
Hattie’s Sleepy Moves. Worked every time—and by every time, I mean once or twice per week.
“Mommy? I’m tired.”
“I know, baby, but we have to get going. I have a surprise for you, but you have to be quiet, okay?”
“Why?”
“We’re chasing after a special unicorn tonight.”
That gets her attention. “Really?”
“Mhmm. I’ll tell you all about it on the way. We’re going into the forbidden forest?—“
“Mommy!”
“I know, sweetie, but you’ll be brave and it’ll be okay.
Can you do that for me?” This is the biggest uncertainty in my plan.
Hattie’s only a little girl and I don’t know how far we have to hike before we find civilization.
But I do remember it isn’t that long and the delivery driver even mentioned how it’s twenty minutes from the store.
We get out of the gate, follow the drive to the main road, ideally hitch a ride to town?—
And then disappear.
I hold Hattie’s hand. Fear strikes deep into my guts. Can I really do this? Can I really escape?
If it were only me, I don’t think I’d try.
I’m a coward. I know, it’s pathetic but it’s true. If I didn’t have my daughter to worry about, I think I’d dream about running away but never follow through, too weak and afraid to do anything.
But for Hattie?
I’d kill for my little girl.
I push open her door, determined to do this. I’ll burn the world for her. I’ll rip up a mountain with my bare hands. Anything it takes?—
I stop short, breath caught in my throat, and a scream at the edge of my tongue.
He’s standing in the hallway wreathed in darkness. A black t-shirt and dark shorts. His tattoos are ghostly and visible, eerie in the soft night lights.
Rafe stares at me calmly.
“We’re searching for a special unicorn,” Hattie says happily. “Want to come, Rafey?”
His eyes drift to her. For a moment, his cold mask slips. “Not tonight, love. You should go back to bed. Your mother was wrong, the unicorn’s not out right now.”
“Is that true, Mommy?”
Tears fill my eyes. My throat closes.
God, why am I so stupid?
“Yes, sweetie, it must be true. Sorry, Mommy made a mistake.”
“Oh, it’s okay. I didn’t want to go. Can I get in bed now?”
“Go ahead, baby.” I kiss her and walk her back to tuck her in. “I love you so much.”
“You too, Mommy.” She snuggles in and cuddles with a pile of new stuffies.
Rafe’s still waiting in the hall. I pull Hattie’s door closed with a click and he studies me. A tingling fear rolls down my spine and I realize he’s angry.
“How did you think this would go?” he asks, voice soft in the darkness. “Explain to me what you were thinking.”
“I’m a prisoner, Rafe. Did you really expect me to roll over and let you own me?”
“No, not that. How did you think you’d get out with her?” His jaw sets, eyes sharpening.
“You’re not angry I tried to escape?”
“Not at all. I expected you to try sooner. But what I want to know is why the fuck did you think you could drag my five-year-old daughter through the pine barrens in the middle of the night?”
I make an involuntary grunt. I feel like someone punched me in the guts. “There’s the driveway?—“
“It’s five miles long.”
My mouth hangs open. “What? Seriously?”
“Yes, June, it’s five miles long, and everything around is rough terrain. You’d hike for hours in the pitch black, your daughter cold and afraid beside you, only to find the dirt fucking road that twists and turns for another five miles to the nearest paved access street.”
“The grocery driver… he said it’s twenty minutes…”
“Twenty minutes to the fucking street in a god damn van.”
My heart sinks in horror at the realization of what I almost did.
I collapse against the wall, chest aching. “I didn’t know…”
“You were going to scar our daughter, and for what? Only for me to catch you?”
I look at him. Rafe’s eyes shine with fury, but there’s something else.
He was worried about Hattie. And maybe he was worried about me. He looks almost…
Afraid.
“I’m a prisoner here. My daughter’s a prisoner too. Our cage is beautiful and comfortable, but it’s still a cage. I was going to do what you forced me to do.”
“You are wrong.” He steps forward, jaw gritted, and grabs my right wrist. He lifts it above my head. I gasp in shock, arching into him. “I’m saving your life and you have no idea.”
“How? Tell me how? And don’t give me some vague bullshit about enemies.”
“You saw your friend. You watched what my brother did to bring you to our wedding.”
My heart leaps as I press my free palm into his chest. I keep it there, pushing lightly, but not doing much, only feeling his heart beating as fast as mine.
“But how do I know this is better? We could have called the police.”
“There are no police in my world.”
“Then make me understand why all of this is necessary.”
He grabs my other wrist—but doesn’t move my hand.
Instead, he pushes it harder against his shirt.
I feel his warm chest beneath the thin cotton and a heat pools between my legs.
Fear, elation, desire, it all battles under my skin, and I don’t know why I’m like this, why I’m feeling this.
I’m afraid and excited, like I wanted him to catch me.
Like I want him to hold me pinned to the wall.
“She’s my daughter,” he whispers hoarsely. “I never wanted any of this for either of you. I stayed away for years… I kept you safe by keeping my distance… but all that changed. They found out about you.”
Coldness spreads into my toes. “Who did?”
“I don’t know yet.”
“Rafe—“
“It’s the truth, damn it.” He grips me hard, leaning in closer, massive body pinning me to the wall. “I did what I felt was necessary and I will keep on doing it, no matter what it takes, because you are mine, June, and that little girl in there is my blood, whether you like it or not.”
Tears spring into my eyes. “I didn’t want you to be a part of her life.”
“And I didn’t either, but here we are.”
He crushes his mouth to mine. I whimper in surprise, fear, anger, hate, and I kiss him back. Desperation builds and crests, crashing down around my body. How far has this man gone to bring me here? How many rules has he broken? And what else will he do?
The hours of watching him interact with my daughter, the way he’s softening to her, how they’ve gotten along so well…
This is hell, I know it, and the devil’s here to ruin me.
And a sick part of me wants him to.
I moan into his mouth as his hand releases my left wrist. He pushes up my top, cupping my breasts roughly. I groan as his knee presses between my legs and I arch down, grinding into him as he bites my lip, kisses my neck, nibbles my ear, yanks the top off and tosses it onto the floor.
“Rafe—“ I whimper his name, afraid of so many things.
“Quiet, love, or we’ll get caught. You don’t want that to happen twice tonight.” He lifts my hand above my head again and kisses my neck then plunges his mouth to mine, tongue gliding between my lips.
His taste is an assault. His touch is everything I need. I should be running right now, escaping this madness with my daughter, but instead I’m letting the very man I’m trying to escape kiss me like he’s going to die if he doesn’t get one last taste.
I curse softly as his lips move down to my chin, my neck, down to my breasts, and down again as he falls to his knees in front of me.
“Oh shit,” I whisper. He tugs down my jeans, taking them off gingerly. His mouth moves to my hips and he murmurs my name as he kisses along the top of my underwear, nibbling and sucking like he’s trying to drink me down.
“Baby,” he says with a heavenly sigh. “God damn you, June, why do you think you can get away from me? Like I’d ever let you go?”
Fucking psycho. I grip his hair hard, ready to rebuke him, but his mouth finds my pussy over my panties and I forget what I was about to say.
He kisses me over the fabric and it’s soaking in moments. I moan instead of screaming. He growls a low rumble of joy and desire, pushing my panties aside, revealing my wet lips to the cool air.
His tongue laps me up and I’m ruined.
There’s no coming back from this.
He licks and sucks. My fingers curl into his hair, both hands now holding onto him like I’m riding his face and gripping on for dear life. I throw my head back and moans escape my lips. I’m struggling to be quiet—Hattie’s in the room behind us, but luckily she sleeps like her father does.
Her father…
The man going down on me in the hallway.
Oh god, oh god, oh god.
His tongue spreads my folds and slides inside, back out, swirling and sucking, focusing on my clit.
Pleasure slams in waves. I arch against his mouth, grinding into him, wanting more.
One of his hands reaches up to shove a thumb between my lips and I suck it eagerly.
The other holds my ass, pulling my pussy tighter to his mouth as he devours me, making the most delicious sounds.
“Baby, you taste so good,” he moans, pulling back and breathing hard, staring up into my eyes. He’s on his knees, the gaze of a desperate penitent. “I want my tongue inside of you when you come.”
Shit.
“I want that too.”
He shoves two fingers in my mouth. I suck them, moaning, before he pulls them out and slides them deep into my pussy. It feels so good I say his name and have to bite my knuckle to keep from screaming out.
He fucks me with his big, tattooed fingers.
H and E gliding deep inside. His mouth sucks and licks my clit, and I’m ruined, god, I’m totally ruined, grinding down on the mouth of my captor, the father of my daughter, my husband, my nightmare and devil, and loving every second of it.
The things this man does to me. The way he does them, like he’s breaking all his rules to take me.
I bite down harder to keep from sobbing his name.
“Baby, please,” he begs, and it destroys me. “Please, baby, come for me, let me lick you clean, baby, please.”
That finally shatters me. I cross the line and fall, unable to come back, as the pressure builds in my core and overflows.
I come against his mouth. My back twists, my core clenches, and I burst to pieces, break to shards, burn to ashes.
I come so hard my vision turns black and he doesn’t stop, the monster, he eagerly licks and coaxes more and more, until I can barely stand.
Only then does he pull back, rocking onto his heels, and slipping his fingers into his mouth to suck every drop of me.
“Now, you will go back to bed,” he says evenly. “You will get under the covers. And you will never try this again.”
“Rafe,” I whimper, mind so wrecked that I can’t come up with an argument.
“Say you understand.”
“I…”
“For your safety, June. And for our daughter.”
I close my eyes. Our daughter.
“I understand.”
“Good girl.” He pats my butt gently. “Now go.”
“Where will you be?” I pick up my clothes, clutching them to my chest.
“In the bathroom.” He stands to his full height. I’m amazed all over again at his size. “Taking care of my needs.”
My cheeks burn as I hurry back into the bedroom.
There’s no escape. Not from a man like this.
Not when I have to think of my daughter.
And my future.
And our safety.
And the way my husband looks at me… like I’m his sin and his downfall… and he can’t wait to burn.
I pull the covers over my head and listen to him moan my name from behind the bathroom door.