Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
Rae
Rae stared at her mom, and her mom stared back at her. Somehow, her mom seemed to know that the answer had been very important, even though she didn’t know why Rae had asked the question and that she’d given the wrong answer.
“Um… why do you ask?” her mom said after a long moment, with too wide a smile.
“Mom!” Rae threw her hands up in the air. “Why did you hide your fights from me? What did you and Dad even fight about?”
Her mom sighed, as if she was giving up.
“Oh, everything.” Her mom waved her hand with a snort.
“Anything. But… well, my parents fought a lot when I was growing up. Big, loud, screaming fights. It drove me nuts. And I was always having the same with Deirdre, which also drove me nuts, and I couldn’t help it.
Your dad and I tried not to because he knew it bothered me, but sometimes it happened anyway.
When I was pregnant with you, I made him promise me that we’d never fight in front of you.
I wanted us to be a united front and didn’t want you to have the same kind of childhood I did. ”
“Oh…” Rae didn’t know what to say. It made sense, yet she suddenly felt like the carpet had been ripped out from underneath her feet, as if her entire childhood had been a lie. “But… when? When did you fight? It should have been impossible to hide anything like that from me.”
Her mom eyed her like she was trying to figure out why Rae was so invested in this, and Rae knew that it was going to be her turn to be questioned soon, but she still had things she wanted to ask. Things she needed to know.
“Well, you know those after-dinner walks we took that you never wanted to go with us on?”
Rae’s jaw dropped open.
“And there was that one time when your dad went on that impromptu fishing trip with his buddies right after one of those walks.” Rae’s mom shook her head. “That man. I almost didn’t let him back in the house after that one.”
“But what were you fighting about?” She knew she’d already asked the question, but she still didn’t understand what her mom meant about everything and anything. How could she? They’d never shown her. As far as she knew, they’d always gotten along perfectly.
“Like I said, anything and everything. That weekend he went on the impromptu fishing trip… I don’t remember. Something about how much time he spent watching football.” Her mom snickered, glee sparkling in her eyes. “He ended up at his mom’s, so no football over there.”
No, Mimi had a ‘no football game’ rule in her home.
“So, he wasn’t even out fishing?”
“Nope.”
And she’d never known. She remembered that weekend being a fun one with her mom.
Though now she understood a little better why her mom had been so energized about having a ‘girl bonding experience’ while her dad was away.
At the time, Rae hadn’t suspected a thing.
She’d been excited by her mom’s seeming excitement.
Looking back now, with full knowledge of what had actually happened, she could see that her mom had probably been covering one high-energy emotion with another.
“Baby, what’s going on?” Her mom reached out to put her hand over Rae’s, concern no longer blooming in her eyes—it had taken full root. “What’s wrong?”
“I thought you guys didn’t fight!” The words burst out of her like an accusation of wrongdoing, startling her mom, though she didn’t pull away.
“Of course, we fight. Everyone fights.”
“I don’t!”
“What?” Her mom frowned at her. “I mean, you’ve always been easygoing, but I wouldn’t say you don’t fight. We’ve had some fights.”
“With other people, though, outside of my own family, I don’t fight.
I especially don’t fight with my boyfriends.
If I fight with a boyfriend, it’s over. That’s it.
And literally, no one would call me easygoing except you.
” Her frustration was growing, as was a strange pit of anger in the ball of her stomach that she didn’t know how to deal with.
Not only had her faith in her parents been a lie, but that lie had been the reason for so many decisions in her life, so many break-ups.
It had been the reason she hadn’t been willing to have it out with Brian about whether or not she really needed to call him ‘Daddy’ or why even Domi’s suggestion of ‘Papi’ had made her hesitate because she hadn’t wanted to fight about whether it was a suitable replacement.
She didn’t know how to fight and make up with a romantic partner.
She’d literally never done it.
Her mom’s mouth dropped open in surprise, her gaze losing its focus like she was going back through her own memories. It wasn’t like Rae hadn’t brought boyfriends around before. She’d had a few semi-serious ones… all that had ended with one fight.
“I… I’m sorry, baby. I thought you’d realize we were fighting, just not around you.”
“Well, I didn’t. I thought you were perfect.
” The urge to run was growing, just like it did with her boyfriends.
Just like it had any time she and her mom had had a fight.
The reason her mom thought she was easygoing was because Rae usually had found it easier to just give in, then do what she wanted in secret.
If she got caught, she accepted the punishment because she’d known it was going to happen and already accepted the consequence as a possibility.
“Baby, no one’s perfect… Rae… Rae, come back here!”
Her mom’s voice followed her down the hallway and out the door, her dad’s voice joining in, filled with confusion. But she had to get away. Everything was falling apart. Everything she’d been so sure of was an illusion, and she didn’t know where she went from here.
Brian
The only joy he got out of having to explain everything to Morgan and Asad was that he’d cock blocked Asad pretty thoroughly.
Which wasn’t really joy so much as petty vengeance for the joy Asad appeared to be getting out of having first-hand access to such a big topic of gossip.
He was beaming the entire time Morgan questioned Brian, listening closely and appearing to be taking mental notes.
At least he wasn’t actually getting out his phone and texting people right in front of Brian’s face.
He looked like he was reaching for it at one point, and the glare Brian had sent him should have singed his hair off.
After that, he sat quietly with his hands in his lap, listening intently and letting Morgan do her thing.
She was a pretty relentless questioner. If there was something she didn’t understand or was unsure of, she did not hesitate to ask.
“I don’t understand why Mitch and Domi would prefer not to know about Rae’s shower.
” Her face creased in a frown, Morgan tapped her fingers against the table, a sure sign she was agitated because she felt like there was something she was missing.
There were a lot of social cues she’d had to learn after escaping the abusive households she’d experienced as a child, then as an early adult.
“It’s not that they would prefer not to know. It’s that Rae didn’t want to bother them because she thought it would stress them out. And I agreed.”
“It wouldn’t stress them out to find out that they didn’t know?”
“Well… not in the same way. And we figured the trip would be over by the time they found out.” He shifted in his seat, trying to think of a way to explain that didn’t sound ill-conceived.
Because the more he had to talk about it, the more he had to face that he and Rae had done some pretty impressive mental gymnastics to land them together that first night.
Granted, they had really had good intentions, but it wasn’t like anyone’s trip would have been ruined…
except maybe theirs because all eyes would have been on them if they’d insisted that he stay with her rather than with one of the couples.
“So, it was better to find out after?” Morgan still seemed confused, though like maybe she was accepting that part of the explanation. Asad’s eyes danced with mirth at Brian’s discomfiture. Yeah, Brian didn’t mind having cock blocked him at all.
“Plus, Rae didn’t want to bother anyone else or end up being a third wheel in someone else’s villa, so she probably would have ended up in mine, anyway.”
“And this way, you wouldn’t have to put up with anyone asking about what you two were doing in there.” Asad spoke up for the first time with a wink.
Brian clenched his jaw as he fake smiled and replied through gritted teeth.
“Exactly.”
Morgan looked back and forth between the two of them.
“I’m not sure I understand. Asad and I didn’t tell anyone about us because everyone had told him not to hook up with me, and I didn’t want to get him in trouble. Would you have been in trouble?”
“No, we just would have had everyone in our business. Wasn’t it nice to get a start to your relationship away from everyone who might have an opinion about it?”
Morgan opened her mouth. Closed it. Tilted her head to the side as she thought.
She looked over at Asad, whose laughing smile had faded to something more rueful.
He gave her a soft look that made Brian’s heart clench again in raw envy.
The two of them had found love, despite all the improbabilities around their relationship—the socially awkward submissive with the overly charming club manwhore had been a surprise match to everyone.
Why not me?
Then Morgan turned back to Brian and asked a question that hit him like a punch to the gut.
“You were starting a relationship with her? I’m confused again. I thought you said you were going to hook up for the week.”
“Well, to be fair, that’s what we said, too,” Asad interjected.
This time, Brian was thankful for him jumping in because Morgan’s question had taken his breath away.
No, he hadn’t been starting a relationship with Rae…
except in some ways, that was exactly what they’d done.
They hadn’t kept emotions out of it. At least, he hadn’t.
Maybe he’d meant to, but he was hurting too much now to believe he’d been able to stay cold.
Deep down, even at the beginning, he was pretty sure he’d known it was going to be like that. Though he hadn’t thought it would be this difficult. He hadn’t anticipated it would hurt this much.
It was supposed to be easier, leaving everything behind on the island and returning to real life. Though, of course, it would help if real life didn’t insist on talking about her. He wasn’t sure who had sent Morgan the text, but when he found out…
“So… are you and Rae in a relationship now?” Morgan asked, turning her attention back to Brian.
“No,” he said shortly, his tone clipped.
He pushed himself up to his feet. As much as he didn’t want to hurt Morgan’s feelings, he was done with this conversation.
He needed to be alone and to rest and to get some distance from all of it.
“And we’re not going to be. For us, it really was just for the trip. Now, I need to go rest.”
Morgan looked like she was about to say something, but Asad reached out and put his hand on her arm, and she subsided.
The last Brian saw of them, Asad was leaning over, speaking softly into her ear.
Maybe trying to explain, maybe trying to distract her.
It didn’t really matter as long as Brian didn’t have to talk about Rae anymore.
Hideaway Island had been the very last and final hurrah.
It was time to leave behind the fantasy once and for all and find a babygirl who actually wanted something real with him.