Chapter 12
chapter twelve
ivory
“Ivory!” Everyone cheered when I walked through the Matthews’ house for family dinner.
“Family!” Glee filled me whenever I was around anyone with the last name Matthews. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but there is something special about being accepted into a group of people outside of obligation. The Matthews didn’t have to love me, but they wanted to anyway.
“Finally, my daughter decides to grace us with her presence,” My mother, Calla, muttered loud enough for me to hear.
“I’m sorry, mother, please forgive me, for I have sinned.” The dramatics ran deep in my family.
Walking her walk toward me with her glowing chestnut skin and short, pixie-cut that was similar to mine – mama was a baddie and she knew it. She went for the bold silver look, and her lineup was sharp. I needed to schedule an appointment with her barber.
I admired the strength in her smile. We had been through a lot as a family once my sperm donor walked away from us.
I have been no contact with him for ten years and it was the best decision I ever made.
My momma never wavered in her love for me, if anything, she loved me hard enough to make up for his absence.
Iris stole her face, while I was a combination of both parents.
I fell into her arms for a hug, and she rubbed my back, feeling the stress fuming off me in waves.
“Are you okay?” She stared into my eyes, hers knowingly waiting for me to confess. “Yes ma’am, don’t worry.” I kissed her cheek before greeting everyone else.
We were at Donavan’s parents’ home for today, which was the usual place we held dinner. The retired basketball stars were loaded, to say the least, and when their sons went into the league, they spoiled their parents.
Aunt Emerson and her wife Jennifer were in the kitchen staring at each other as if no one existed, it was beautiful. I waited for a twinge of hurt to hit me because I thought that was going to be me and my ex, but it never came.
“Em, baby, we have an admirer.” Jennifer laughed, giving Emerson one last kiss before stepping out of her hold to give me a hug.
“Hi aunties, can I talk to you guys for a minute, privately?” I whispered the last part, I didn’t want this to turn into a whole family discussion.
They looked at each other before nodding, then we went upstairs into one of the family guest rooms.
“Ivory, what’s going on, love?” Emerson asked,
I got up from the chair to pace back and forth. If anyone would understand what I was internally battling, it was them.
“I-I kissed Donavan,” Even though we had done way more than kissing, I was going to keep this conversation as PG as possible.
“How did it make you feel?” Jennifer asked, grabbing my hand to catch my eye.
It made me feel a lot of things, too many things. Feelings that I never felt in my last relationship.
“It was the best kiss of my life but that’s the problem!
I’m not supposed to feel alive when he touches me.
My heart isn’t supposed to stop beating when he winks at me.
He isn’t supposed to have feelings for me!
I’m just confused, no other man, or person has ever made me feel like this. ” I swiped a tear from my eye.
After our date earlier this week, Donavan had to report to Arizona for training. I’ve missed him every day since he’s been gone. I took a shower with his bodywash, it was pathetic.
Emerson smiled at me, “Damn girl, it sounds like you have it bad. Those Matthews boys are a problem, just like their damn daddy. You should have seen the little heifers flocking after my little brother our whole lives. All jokes aside, tell me why you are so adamant about this not happening. You can’t stop love, Ivory, it’s okay for you to follow your heart.
What’s the real problem here?” I stared into their loving gaze and spoke my truth.
“I feel like a traitor to the community that accepted me when my own father refused me. You two know how they feel about lesbians coming out as bisexual. We are told that we’re greedy and just want the best of both worlds.
My ex accused me of having feelings for Donavan and I told her she was dead wrong.
There are so many feelings, my heart feels conflicted. ”
Jennifer pulled me into a hug, her strength depositing into me. I held onto her for a bit longer, counting to ten before pulling away. It was just what I needed.
“Baby, I went through the same thing. I identify as bisexual; I chose to spend the rest of my life with a woman. You should have heard the names I was called back in the day, it was horrible. I learned a lesson, too – if you are worried about the community you chose to embrace shunning you, then find a new one. You can be with whoever you want to, fuck all that other noise. If my nephew is who you chose then choose that man. As long as you pick someone who is everything you love in a partner then that’s the most important part.
” Jennifer was right, I smiled through the few tears cascading down my face.
“Yeah, you heard my wife, fuck all that noise.” Aunt Em was as silly as they came. Her silly persona meshed well with Jennifer’s no-nonsense personality. They were a perfect match.
I took a step back and hugged Emerson, she swayed us side to side dramatically, eliciting a giggle from me. They were the two I went to talk to when I first came out.
“Thank you, aunties. I love you both.”
“We love you, too!” They cheered, hugging me one last time.
When we walked back downstairs, everyone was seated around the table. I sat next to Braylin, and he gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“Hi stranger, what you been doing?” I haven’t seen him since we all went out to the club to celebrate with Camille and Graycen. We didn’t have time to really talk that night.
Braylin gave me that boyish grin all the Matthews boys gave, filled with mischief and danger.
“Oh you know, doing a little bit of this and that. How are you doing? I’m sorry I missed the non-wedding, well I guess it doesn’t matter anyways.” He teased, and surprisingly, the jab didn’t sting.
“Braylin!” Mama Tracey scolded him.
I laughed, smacking him in the back of the head. Leave it up to Braylin to say exactly what’s on his mind, he was the most brazen out of the three.
“It’s fine, mama, he’s a jerk. But, I am doing good, for anyone who was concerned. Donavan has been doing a good job of helping me heal.” I took a sip of my water and almost spit it out when Graycen opened his big mouth.
“Hmm, healing you with what, Ivory? I bet he’s doing just that.” I shot him a look and he winked.
Tracey looked at me but I shoved some salad in my mouth. Elijah smirked but he didn’t say anything. If I knew Donavan as well as I thought I did, the entire family knew about the development of our relationship. I wasn’t upset, though, we had a very open relationship with everyone.
I sat my fork down to address their questioning looks, “We are dating to see if there is anything here other than friendship. Don’t get too excited, guys, I don’t want you to get your hopes up for nothing.”
“This is news to me, but I have loved that little boy since the day he came over to study with you over fifteen years ago.” My mom said, reaching over to meet Mama Tracey for a high-five.
Elijah smiled, “It wouldn’t change anything for us, you are already a member of the family.
There’s nothing wrong with seeing where it could go, you don’t have to worry about any backlash from any of us.
If anyone is giving you two a hard time, send them my way so we can have a talk.
” He jested, making me smile at his overprotectiveness.
“Thank you, guys. I really appreciate it.” We ate our dinner, enjoying each other’s company. I laughed until my sides burned and spent the night in the Donavan’s guest room.
“Ms. Jones, I’m sorry I missed our zoom call earlier this week, my caterer had an issue with booking her room at the resort for our wedding.
I’m sorry, you don’t need to hear my excuses.
” Clarissa rambled nervously, I didn’t like having my time wasted, but I understood wedding jitters, so I let her off with a soft warning.
“It is fine, Clarissa; you are lucky to have your cousin to cater for you. Haha, weddings can be so expensive at times. Let’s discuss the order of the events.
I reviewed your portfolio and I have to say, this is beautiful.
I love that you are giving your guests a full two weeks before the festivities start, thank you for covering my flight, too, you didn’t have to.
When will I have a chance to meet your fiancée?
Did she not want to sit in on our meetings?
” I watched Clarissa visually sigh, but she offered me a half smile.
“No, she has been busy. Of course, you will get to know her during our time there. She can’t make excuses once we have to do our rehearsals.” We went over all the precautionary things that could go wrong, and Clarissa took everything in stride.
Our meeting lasted for a while; it was our last one until we had to be in Arizona. I took solitude in Donavan’s library; he texted me earlier and told me to call him once I made it to the room.
He answered my Facetime call within seconds, it was close to 10:00 p.m. and I knew we had a two-hour time difference.
“You answered the phone pretty quickly, is someone missing me?” I teased him, he was lying on the bed shirtless with just a towel wrapped around his waist.
I drank him all in while he smirked at me, causing my core to throb.
“You know I always miss you when you’re not with me.” I rolled my eyes, and his grin widened, forcing mine to match. The new, foreign feelings of the way my body changed around him still rattled me at times.
My heart kept skipping beats whenever his name was brought up yesterday at dinner, I was hoping he would walk through the door. Even though I knew he wasn’t going to, it hurt nevertheless.
Whenever he smiled, there was a tiny flutter in my heart. It could have been because of the pure joy that filled me at seeing my best friend happy.
We have always been truthful with each other so I wouldn’t switch that up now that new feelings were developing. Most of the feelings were lust, but a tingle of something else was brewing.
“I miss you, too, everyone kept asking about you yesterday and my heart kept hoping you would walk through the door.” Donavan looked surprised at my confession.
In the past, I would have joked around about not missing him, but this bucket list was our time to see if I could feel something more for him.
He didn’t say anything for a second, but his eyes were searching mine and I let him. There was safety in our friendship, I didn’t have to hide from him. A part of me didn’t want to.
“That makes me happy, love. Tell me all about your day.” I told him about my meeting with Clarissa.
“That’s dope that she covered your flight, I would have gotten your tickets for you.
You can stay at my home over there, I checked out the distance from the resort, it’s only twenty-five minutes away.
Most nights, we’ll be able to see each other but I would feel better if you stayed there.
You know you are bad about taking care of yourself when you’re in work mode.
” My mouth gaped open at him calling me out.
He wasn’t wrong, though. I loved my job, but it was very overwhelming most of the time, my health often fell to the wayside.
“Donny, shut up; I will do better, you don’t have to watch over me all the time. I’m a grown woman, I managed to keep myself alive this entire time.” He raised an eyebrow.
“Oh yeah, who sent you lunch for six months when you had that bridezilla two years ago?”
“You.” I mumbled.
“And who else had to text you every night for three months to remind you to take your medicine?”
“That would be you again.” I rolled my eyes, not wanting to make eye contact with him. I knew he wore a cocky smirk.
“And who else?—”
I cut him off, “Okay, I get it. It’s not my fault you are always there to remind me of things before I can get to them.
That was one of the issues in my relationship with Acacia, she was jealous and accused you of overstepping your boundaries.
” I never told him about the fights we had concerning him.
It was hard for me to let go of the dynamic we’ve had since we became friends.
“I can see that, I would have backed off if you said something, why didn’t you mention it?”
“You know I don’t do well with change, that’s how things have always been and I was fine with it.
Acacia didn’t take care of me the way you always have, she didn’t offer to take over the things you did.
She just didn’t want you to do them. I like being taken care of, it means a lot that even though you have your own life, you’re always thinking of my needs, too. ” He nodded in agreement.
“Yeah, as a man, if my woman had someone doing all the shit I do for you, I would be pissed. I never thought too much into it, though, it was just natural for me. Speaking of needs, what do you need right now?” His tone changed to a seductive tenor, my nipples recognized the message before my brain could catch up.
“I don’t need anything…”
Donavan propped the phone up and let his towel drop. His most dangerous weapon sprang to life, more impressive than my best toy.
“You sure about that, Poison Ivy? Because I have a few things I need from you.” He licked his palm before stroking it with firm motions. His camera definition was so good, I could see a few drops of precum forming at his tip.
“I-I don’t—” Why the hell was I stumbling over my words?
Donavan grinned, “Go look on the shelf where I keep your books and grab the stuff I hid over there for you.” Turning my head to look, I noticed a small purple gift bag tucked slightly behind a book.
I opened the bag to see a purple butt plug and a medium sized dildo, one of those that moved on its own.
“But what’s this for?” I knew what it was for but I didn’t expect us to do anything unless we were together.
“Item 9, FaceTime sex, now strip. Have you had a shower yet?”
“No not yet, I was going to go after we got off the phone.” I removed his shirt that I stole a few years ago.
“Let’s go get you cleaned up.”