Chapter 15
JINX
Me: Uno reverse. Can I get your opinion on something this time?
Rachel: Did you buy a new dress, too?
Ilaugh and lean an elbow on the console in my truck. The things I could do with that smart mouth of hers…
Me: As a matter of fact, I did. Can I stop by and show you?
Rachel: Oh, a fashion show. Bring it on.
Ten minutes later, she greets me at her front door, wearing a bright smile. “I don’t see any dresses.”
I lift my laptop bag. “It’s in here.”
Her mouth forms a cute little O as she steps aside and lets me in. “Online shopping, huh?”
“Don’t tell anyone, but I have an addiction to those cheap foreign websites.”
She giggles while I kick off my boots in the foyer. The house is quiet, save for the muted jazz she seems to like.
“No kids tonight?”
“It’s Casen’s birthday, so they’re having a sleepover at Bobbie Jean’s.”
“Nice.” At least I’m not interrupting family time, though the discarded laptop and blanket on the couch signal I’ve disrupted something. “Are you working on one of your classes?”
“Yes, but I’m just reading. It’s not serious.” She goes to the living room to close the laptop.
“Actually, keep it open. If you don’t mind.”
Tilting her head and eyeing me, she takes a seat on the couch. “Okay. I’m intrigued.”
I claim a spot on the other end of the couch, a safe distance from her, and pull out my laptop. Fuck, I hope she doesn’t notice the tremor in my hands. The only other person I’ve shown this to so far is Amelia, and her feedback contained more sarcasm than viable input.
“What’s your email address?”
Rachel recites it as I type, and a few seconds later, an email notification appears on her screen.
“So mysterious,” she muses. She gets cozy with the laptop and her blanket, then she clicks around and scans the document I sent her. “A business plan?”
I swallow hard. “It’s rough, but I don’t think it’s too far off from what I want.”
“And what is that?” she asks, keeping her focus on her screen. “To go out on your own?”
“I want to expand the landscaping part of EE. And”—this is the most nerve-racking part of all—“to tell Jesse I want to be a partner.”
Her eyes light up, and the smile on her face is pure and genuine.
Relief cools some of my anxiety. I wasn’t worried that she’d judge me. She’s Rachel, after all. But I like her, and I want her to see me as smart and capable. And if I’m lucky, a man she might be willing to give a chance to in the future.
“You’re finally going to do it,” she says, shaking her head and grinning.
“What do you mean finally?”
“I’ve never understood why you weren’t already a partner.”
“Ah.” I rub at my stubble. “That’s complicated.”
“Craig said you weren’t interested.”
“I wouldn’t say I wasn’t interested,” I hedge. “I was young when Jesse took over. He was, too, but he’d finished college, at least. I was still taking classes. The timing was bad.”
“Oh. I thought maybe there was another reason.”
I blow out a long breath. “I didn’t want to let Jesse down, either.”
She tips her head with either pity or empathy in her eyes. I can’t tell which. “Justin…”
“I know. It sounds weak, and I’m not proud of that.”
“It doesn’t sound weak at all.” She sets the laptop aside and scoots closer, resting her hand on my thigh. “I think it’s sweet how much you look up to your brothers and how much you want to please them.”
A dry laugh escapes me. “Yeah, well…”
“But you’re not a kid anymore.”
The pointedness of her statement sends my gaze darting back to hers.
“You’re ready now.”
My heart stutters at the sincerity in her expression. “I’ve been ready for a while.”
“Good.” She squeezes my leg gently. “So you’re going to talk to Jesse, then?”
“I might’ve started the conversation the other day. We were both pretty heated, though.”
“Oh.” She exhales slowly. “So you’re worried he won’t be open to the idea?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. A few years ago, I think he would have jumped at the opportunity to unload some of the responsibility onto me. But now Hayden’s helping him, and she and Jett are living in Cole Creek, too. It’s only a matter of time before they have more kids, and I can see Jesse wanting to keep things as they are so he can pass the company down to them without having to worry about me.”
She gives me a sweet smile. “You won’t know unless you ask him.”
With my lips pressed together, I dip my chin. “I know.”
“Your plan looks good. But make sure he understands that this is more than just a business move for you.”
She figured that out, did she?
I offer a small smile. “How do you know that?”
“You wear your heart and your passion on your sleeve.” She tugs at my T-shirt to make her point. “It’s not about the money or the notoriety. If it were about the money, you wouldn’t work as hard as you do without getting paid for it.”
Eyes narrowed, I frown at her. “I never told you about that.”
She laughs softly. “It’s in the business plan. You want to move from hourly to salaried. Your breakdown of what you’re currently working and being paid compared to what you’d be making on salary gave it away.”
“Oh.” I cringe. That’s embarrassing.
“Don’t do that.” She presses her palm to my cheek and turns my face to hers. “My point is, you love what you do, and you’ve been doing it for far less than what your time and energy are worth. My guess is that you just want the business that’s been the lifeblood of your family to be as successful as possible. It’s not about you.”
“Some of it is,” I admit. “I think I’ve worked hard enough to earn my place in the company.”
“To earn your place beside Jesse, you mean. As an equal.”
My chest is so damn tight it’s hard to breathe. How the hell is she so good at this?
“Do you have a special key to my mind or something, Sunny?”
“So I’m right?”
“Maybe.”
“Just maybe?” She shoves at my leg playfully. “Men.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” I grasp her wrist and hold her hand away from me.
“Men never want to admit when a woman is right.”
“Oh, really?” I hook an arm around her waist and playfully dig my fingers into her side. “What about me coming over to ask a woman for her opinion? Don’t I get credit for that?”
She giggles and squirms into me instead of away from me. “Okay, fine. A little credit.”
“Just a little?” I pull her onto my lap and stop tickling.
In return, she stops squirming and heaves one breath after another, recovering from the torture.
We stay like that, wrapped up in each other and the moment. And it’s perfect.
I’ve spent the past few weeks wanting to touch her so badly… to feel her lips against mine for longer than the split second they touched that night at The Creek.
But this is just as nice. This level of comfort. The intimacy.
“Have you had dinner yet?” she asks.
“Uh…” Did I eat? Hell, did I even have a break this afternoon? “I don’t think so.”
She jumps up and throws her hands in the air with an exasperated huff. “Well, then I better feed you.”
Before I can respond, she marches to the kitchen, leaving me staring after her.
“Good thing I have leftovers,” she calls over her shoulder.
I chuckle and toss my ball cap onto my laptop bag, then I haul myself off the couch and follow her. “You don’t need to feed me.”
She tips her head and gives me one of those motherly looks of disapproval. “No, but I’m going to.”
Twenty minutes and two massive chicken salad croissants later, I sit back in one of her dining room chairs, wishing I’d stopped at home to change and put on joggers.
“Holy shit, I’m stuffed. Thank you.”
Chin resting in one of her hands, she smiles from across the table. “And to think you turned your nose up at those grapes.”
“Grapes and chicken aren’t supposed to go together.” I hold up a finger before she can protest. “But they worked here. This was amazing.”
“See.” With a pleased smirk, she gets up and takes my plate to the sink. “Any room for dessert? I have frozen cheesecake bites I might be convinced to share. It’s not your mother’s cheesecake, but…”
I stand and stretch, my belly fuller than it’s been in days. “Did the two of you ever set a baking date?”
“No, not yet. It’s been a busy summer.”
“You should take her up on the offer when things settle down. She’d love that.” I join her in the kitchen and spot several clean dishes on a rack next to the sink. “Can I put these away?”
“We’ll see about the cheesecake, and not a chance on the dishes.” She waves me off. “Confession?”
“Hit me.”
“I don’t bother putting them away anymore,” she says almost conspiratorially. “It’s easier to just grab them from the rack when we need them again.”
Hmm. I can’t help but smirk. I suppose I’m thankful for that. I’ve never put them away, and now I know she won’t be horrified if she discovers that tidbit about me.
Embarrassed, she presses her hands to her cheeks. “That sounded ridiculous, didn’t it?”
“No.” I huff a laugh. “I leave my clean dishes in the drying rack all the time.”
Sighing, she carefully folds a hand towel and hangs it over the oven handle. “My mother wouldn’t go to sleep until the house was as perfect as it was when we woke up in the morning. Laundry done and put away. Dishes done and cupboards organized. My dad’s shirts ironed and perfect…” She lowers her head and trails off.
“Sunny?”
She scratches at something on the counter, unwilling to meet my eye. “Yeah?”
I step forward, wrap my arms around her shoulders, and pull her against me. “You’re a good mom,” I say into her hair. “And I don’t doubt for a second that you were a damn good wife, too.”
She tenses for a beat, then a tremor rocks her body and she fists my T-shirt at my lower back. “How do you know that?” she rasps, melting into me.
“Because you’re a good woman.” I kiss her temple and then pull back so I can see her face.
In response, she burrows into my shirt and shakes her head.
“Don’t hide from me.” I lift her chin gently and search her watery eyes. “Don’t hide who you are or how you feel. Not from me.”
“You don’t know me well enough to say that,” she whispers.
“I know plenty.” I hold an arm out and gesture to the dining room. “I know you’re a great host. And an amazing cook.” Then I wave toward the living room, where our laptops still sit. “You’re smart, too. And kind.”
She looks up at me, lashes fluttering, with so much hope in her expression that it almost breaks my heart.
This woman has been through so much, and something tells me that Craig and her divorce aren’t even the worst of it. She’s been hard on herself. Trying to live up to the legacy of a woman who isn’t here to tell her to knock it off.
“It wasn’t easy for me to come here tonight and share that plan with you, but you told me you trusted me, and I thought maybe I’d take a chance and trust you, too.”
Her bottom lip trembles, so I swipe my thumb across it.
“You’re enough, Sunny. More than enough.” I lower my forehead to hers. “I want to kiss that quiver from your lips so badly right now.”
Those pretty eyes widen, and she grips my T-shirt tighter. “Justin…”
“I know.” I shouldn’t say it. I shouldn’t want it. I shouldn’t even be here right now. But there’s something about this woman that I can’t shake.
“I don’t think you do,” she whispers again, shifting closer so that her chest is pressed against my ribcage and my hardening dick presses against her stomach. “Because if you did, you’d know I want the same.”
That’s all I need to hear.
Hands to her face, I tip her head up and crash my lips against hers.
She tastes like something sweet, probably those damn grapes, and a woman who’s denied herself for far too long. The way she grasps at me, trying to get closer, deeper, promises I’m right.
She’s starved.
And I’m just the guy to feed that hunger.
Bending, I curl an arm around her ass and lift her to the counter. She spreads her knees wide for me, and I go eagerly, wedging my hips between her thighs so she can feel as much of me as I can her.
I can’t begin to guess at all she needs, all she’s been hungering for, but if I have it, it’s hers.
I break the kiss and trail my lips to her jaw, then the curve of her neck, all the while doing my best not to lose my shit.
“Justin,” she murmurs. My name on her lips is music to my ears. Fuck, I hope she never calls me anything else.
“What do you want, baby?” I nip at the skin below her ear, then soothe the sting with my tongue.
“I-I don’t know.” As the words stutter out of her, she slides her fingers to the hem of my shirt.
My heart is pounding in my ears, and every inch of me is a live wire, but I can’t help but smile. She knows. She fucking knows, and I’m all hers if she wants me.
“I got you.” I kiss her mouth again, then pull back and strip the shirt over my head. “Better?”
She gulps hard and nods, splaying her hands across my chest. The wonderment in her eyes is not lost on me. “You’re so warm. And beautiful.”
“I think that’s my line,” I tease, watching her fingers dance over my skin as she explores my pecs and biceps.
“Are you even real?”
I grind my cock between her legs until her eyes flutter shut and she moans.
“Does that feel fake to you?”
I don’t wait for an answer. I kiss her again, this time to leave no doubt in her mind just how real this is. Tongue against tongue, teeth scraping lips, and hands everywhere until she’s breathless and pulsing against me.
“Touch me,” she begs. “Please.”
“My fucking pleasure.”
In one quick motion, I lift her tank top over her head and toss it to the floor. She’s wearing a pink sports bra that easily gives way when I tug down with both hands.
“Jesus Christ,” I murmur, my mouth watering at the sight of her pretty pink nipples, big and full and so fucking perfect.
I dip my head and suck one between my lips while I toy with the other. Only when she’s writhing against me, her hands wound tight in my hair, do I switch and start the game all over again. Lick, suck, nip, tweak over and over again until she vibrates with need and is grasping desperately for my fly.
She flicks the button open and tugs at the zipper.
Halfway down, she pushes me away, chest heaving. “We can’t do this.” Her eyes are swimming with panic as she tugs her bra back into place. “Oh my god. Oh shit…”
“Hey…” I grasp her wrists to slow her down. “Breathe for me, baby. Just breathe.”
She swallows hard and closes her eyes, pulling in one deep breath after another until the panic fades. Her lips still tremble, and I suspect she’s holding back a wave of tears, but she keeps it together.
“Good girl.” I cup her cheek and remain close. We might’ve let things get out of hand, but I’m not going anywhere, and I need her to know that. “Better?”
She nods, and then her eyes flutter open, revealing tears. “I’m sorry,” she rasps.
“What are you sorry for, Sunny?” I stroke the pad of my thumb along her jaw.
“We shouldn’t have done that. I-I’m still married.” She whispers the words like they’re a dirty secret.
“I know.” I should have guessed her moral compass would be a strong one. “But we didn’t do anything wrong. You know that, right?”
Her face flushes red, but she gives a subtle nod.
“Thank you for looking over the business plan.” I stroke my knuckles along her jaw. “I appreciate that.”
“I’ll take a closer look and give you some feedback. If that’s what you’re looking for.”
I nod. “If you want, sure.”
“I’m happy to.” She presses her hands to my bare chest, but with a sharp intake of breath, she pulls them away again. “I…” She worries her lip, eyes downcast for a moment, but then she takes a deep breath and meets my eye. “I enjoyed what happened here tonight, but it can’t happen again.”
I nod, but we both know this isn’t over.
Sunny and me? We’ve only just begun.