Chapter 23
RACHEL
The sound of the dryer buzzer stirs me from my sleep, and I stretch lazily on the couch. I shouldn’t be so tired, considering how well I slept last night, but then again… I smile to myself. Maybe the excursions before the sleep have a little something to do with my lethargy.
The dryer opens and closes down the hall, and I bolt upright in response, my heart stopping.
Fortunately, the discarded Nikes in the foyer catch my eye before panic gets the best of me. With my hand on my chest, I blow out breath and will my muscles to relax.
Just Justin, my knight in a shiny white pickup truck.
But why on earth is he in my laundry room?
And where did this blanket come from?
Oh, this man. He’s going to ruin me if I’m not careful.
“Um, hello?” I call, padding down the hall and rubbing the sleep from my eyes. “What are you doing?”
“Hey, sleeping beauty,” he says when I hit the laundry room doorway. He tosses a grin over his shoulder while he shakes out one of my shirts. Then he folds it on the laundry table. “Did you have a good nap?”
“Yes…” I take note of Mason’s empty laundry basket and the washing machine hitting the spin cycle. “Are you doing my laundry?”
“Yep.” He shrugs and presses his lips together in a modest smile. “I also put the clean towels in the front bathroom. Not sure if they belong there, but there was room.”
I blink a few times, wrap an arm around my torso, and pinch myself.
Nope. Not a dream.
“Did you just pinch yourself?” He flashes a crooked smile.
“Are you for real right now? And what is that smell?” I pull in a deep breath, my chest expanding, trying to discern the aroma.
“Beef tips. I hope you like mushrooms.”
Maybe I died in my sleep, and this is what heaven is like.
I close the distance between us, loop my arms around his waist, and bury my face in his chest.
Hmm. Smells like the real thing. Feels warm and solid like the real thing, too.
“You okay?” He holds me tight and strokes my back.
“What did I do to deserve you?” I ask into his shirt.
With a chuckle, he presses a kiss to the top of my head. “Um, you were born?”
“I’m serious. It’s like you swept into my life one night and have done all the right things since. Like an angel or something.”
A robust laugh shakes his chest. “I am no angel, Sunny.”
He wasn’t last night, that’s for sure. “You could be a pervy angel. With devil horns.”
“Now that’s more like it.” He leans back against the table, spreads his legs, and pulls me into the V. “Probably a tail, too.”
“Mm-hmm.” Sliding my hands around his hips, I squeeze what I can of his butt. “You’ve definitely got tail.”
He arches back and lifts a brow. “I like fresh from a nap Rachel.”
“Yeah? Well, I like you all the time.” My chest goes tight as I make the admission. It’s terrifying to bring my feelings out in the open like this, but it’s the truth. He and I have evolved into this… thing. We haven’t talked about it. We haven’t named it. We’re just… here. It’s a little unnerving, but it feels so completely right.
With his pale blue eyes dancing back and forth between mine, he trails his knuckles along my cheek. “Seems we’ve found ourselves in a little situation, haven’t we?”
With a nod, I bring my hands up to his chest, soaking in his warmth. “Is it weird for you?”
“Why would it be weird?”
“Because I’m older. And a mom. Who’s technically still married.”
“Nah, babe.” He shakes his head, then, in a low, tender voice, says, “I don’t give a shit about our ages. And your kids are amazing. The married part…” He hesitates. “It does trip me up a little. I want you to be ready.”
I want to be sure I’m ready, too. But more than that, I don’t want to lose this opportunity with him.
“I’ve tried not to rush this,” he adds. “But you’re so fucking hard to stay away from.”
“I’ve noticed.” I glide my fingertips across his chest and then down to his abs, relishing how they twitch and tense under my touch.
One corner of his mouth ticks up in a grin. “Yeah?”
“You can’t seem to help yourself when it comes to doing things for me.” Over the fabric of his T-shirt, I tease a fingertip along the waistband of his shorts. “I’m not sure I’ve ever properly thanked you for all you’ve done.”
He tips his head, his smile softening. “You’ve thanked me plenty, Sunny. And I’m happy to do it.”
“That may be, but…” Lip caught between my teeth and nerves skittering through me, I regard him. I may be older, but there is no doubt he’s more experienced. What we did last night was a first for me. “I enjoyed our video chat. A lot.”
He zeroes in on my lips, and his lashes fall heavy over hazy eyes. “Me, too.”
“There was one part that didn’t work for me, though.” I casually slip a hand beneath the hem of his shirt.
He shivers at my touch, but a moment later, when my words register, he frowns. “Did I do something wrong? Tell me.”
I ease his concern with a stroke of my thumb over the V of muscle just above his hip. “I wanted to see you.” Feeling bold, like I did last night, I hook my fingers in the waistband of his shorts.
“You…” He clears his throat. “You couldn’t see me?”
I scrape my teeth along my bottom lip and shake my head. “I only saw your hand. And the mess you made.”
A ghost of a smile flickers across his lips, and his eyes light with desire. “You should’ve told me.”
“You were busy.” I shift closer, my mouth a hairsbreadth from his. “Besides, I think I have a solution.”
His breathing picks up, his chest rising and falling against mine. “Sunny, I think I know where this is going and—”
I press a finger to his lips. “Don’t argue with me.”
His cock twitches in his shorts and hardens against my stomach. Even if his head tells him he should deny me, his body clearly disagrees.
“I want to see you,” I murmur, gently tugging at the cotton of his shorts and then his boxer briefs beneath. “I want to touch you, too.”
“Sunny…” My name is a raw warning. Or maybe it’s a plea.
“You’ve done so much for me…” I slip a hand inside the fabric. He’s thick and hot to the touch. The heavy fullness of him is in complete juxtaposition to the smooth satin of his skin. And the way his lips part and his eyes darken as he watches me empowers me to tug his shorts down just a bit farther and drop to my knees.
“Ah, fuck, Sunny.” He gently tangles his fingers in my hair.
Focus locked on his face, I lick along the underside of his cock. He’s perfect and beautiful, and the heady look of arousal in his eyes fuels my desire to do this for him even more.
He’s already done so much for me.
He’s been so good to me when he didn’t have to be.
And there’s nothing sexier than a man who knows how to be exactly that… a man.
I pull back just enough to wet my lips and tease my tongue around his crown before taking him into my mouth. He’s big, and I’m out of practice, so I take my time, learning his body and letting myself acclimate. In return, he’s patient and his hands in my hair are gentle.
“That’s so fucking sexy,” he murmurs as he watches my every move. The way I take a little more of him with every bob. The way I fist the base of his shaft and work my hand in tandem with my mouth. “I didn’t think you could get any prettier, but you’re absolutely stunning with my dick in your mouth.”
Excitement flutters in my stomach and warm arousal spreads through my body like a slow burning wildfire. Encouraged by his praise, I open wide and take him as deep as I can until he hits the back of my throat and I gag.
Instinct tells me I should be embarrassed, but I’m not. Not with this man. He’s already figured out so many of my weaknesses and he’s never once made me feel ashamed. This is no different.
So I do it again and again, until I can take all of him, and until his hips begin to pulse in time with my mouth.
“Ah, shit, that’s good.” His hands fist in my hair as he bares his teeth in a hiss. “You like sucking my cock, Sunny?”
I nod eagerly around him despite my watering eyes. I don’t just like it; I love it. And my drenched panties are proof.
I’ve never enjoyed giving head before. In fact, I despised it because it was always obligatory and never reciprocated. But this is different. This man is different, and right now, I want to give him just a little bit of the relief he’s given me.
He runs his knuckles along my cheekbone. “Relax for me, baby. Let me fuck that pretty mouth of yours.”
Jesus. If he keeps talking like that, I might come without laying a single hand on myself.
“That’s it.” He curls a hand around my throat as he strokes in gently but intently, giving me a little more of himself with every thrust. “Look how good you swallow me.”
Oh my god. Oh. My. God.
“I’m not gonna last long,” he warns. “Not when you look like this. If you don’t want to taste me, Sunny, you better let me—”
I curl a hand around his balls the second he hits the back of my throat and I swallow. I have no idea what I’m doing, but it must be right, because his legs begin to shake and the sexiest, most guttural groan rolls up from his chest.
“Fuccck.” He pulls back and pushes in again, and I swallow him down a second time, tears streaming down my cheeks.
Once, twice, three times more, he thrusts, and when he thickens on my tongue and tries to push me away, I hold on tight.
“Ah, shit. Ahhh.” He comes hard with his head thrown back, the tendons in his neck and the muscles in his arms and torso twitching.
I barely taste his release before swallowing it down and then quickly pulling back for breath. My chest heaves and my pussy aches, but I have no intention of doing anything about that. This was about him.
“Holy shit,” he pants, his hazy gaze falling on mine as I wipe my tears and smile up at him.
“You good?”
He laughs devilishly, tugs up his shorts, and hauls me up to my feet, his big arms wrapping me up tight. “I’m so fucking good. Thank you for that.”
What am I supposed to say to that? You’re welcome? Ha. No way. So, I say nothing at all, and just enjoy being close to him like this. His proximity calms something in me and makes me feel safe. His presence in my life has filled a loneliness I hadn’t fully acknowledged, either. It’s not just him and me.
It’s us.
Us.
It”s a simple word. Just a single syllable. But it holds so much potential and so much promise. A promise I didn’t realize I even wanted or needed anymore. A side effect, I suppose, of living in an essentially loveless marriage for as long as I did.
He pulls back and regards me for a beat, his eyes darting back and forth between mine. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I smile up at him. “I just… I think part of me gave up on ever feeling like this again. So, moments like this? They’re so surreal sometimes.”
His jaw tightens and understanding sets into his gaze. “I hate that you felt that way.”
So do I. But it’s how things were, and a small voice in the back of my head warns me to be careful now. I’ve enjoyed having Justin in my corner, but there’s no guarantee it will last.
As much as I want this, I have to be real with myself, too.