Chapter 6
KADENCE
My body lurched forward in bed, the cotton sheets tangled around my limbs.
Sweat kissed my body, dripping from my brow as my heart thundered in my chest. I couldn’t breathe.
The nightmare still had its icy grip wrapped around my mind, preventing me from focusing on the moment.
Nausea swirled in my stomach, but I had nothing to throw up.
I needed to get out of here.
I couldn’t stay here.
What was the point of staying in a place that caused me misery? Westhaven should have been my peace, but now it was my prison. I had nothing, but I couldn’t stay here.
I stumbled out of bed, fighting with the sheets as I tottered against the floor.
The only reason I didn’t fall was because of the dresser next to the bed.
I couldn’t do this. Hunter said it was time to stop running, but that was the only thing I knew how to do.
If I wasn’t running from my pain, I had to live with it.
And right now, it was screaming at me. There had to be a different place in this godforsaken country where I could just be myself.
My hands ran down my face. Why couldn’t I have a normal fucking life?
There was nothing but this sorrow and anguish deep inside me with no light at the end of the tunnel.
I knew I was projecting right now, but damn.
How much could one person take? I was tired of fighting these damn battles when I never should’ve had them to begin with.
I found a bag and threw in a few clothes.
When I got here, I had nothing. But as the days morphed into weeks and then months, I slowly accumulated possessions.
And now I would start fresh somewhere else.
I had no clue where I would go this time, but I would find somewhere.
Maybe I would meet people as amazing as Annika and her men.
When I peeked out of the room, the coast was clear, and I made a beeline for the front door. “Kadence?” Annika questioned, her voice laced with sleep. “What are you doing?”
“I gotta go. I’m sorry.”
And then I was outside, running down the street. Where the fuck was I going? There was nowhere for me to go. Before I went to the gate of the complex, someone grabbed my arm.
“Kadence,” Annika cried. “Stop. You don’t have to run.” Drew was fast behind her with the other two close behind. “Please, stop running. You don’t have to go through this alone.”
My lip trembled and before I realized it, my knees gave out as Drew caught me.
I spent my entire life alone. There had been no one in my life who cared for me and wanted me in their lives, or to be with me when the darkness took over.
Annika pulled me into her arms, holding me tightly.
I hugged her, burying my face into her neck as I sobbed.
My heart hurt. There was so much anguish inside me it felt like I would shatter, but I wasn’t alone.
Annika and her guys were my family. They cared about me and wanted me to be safe.
“Let’s get back inside,” Drew whispered. “And then we can talk.”
I nodded, using Drew to pull myself up as I leaned into Annika. When we got inside, Annika sat down next to me on the couch. “I thought I was okay.”
Drew ran his hand down my back, pausing for a second to make sure I was okay. “Did you ever process what happened to you?”
I shook my head, sighing. “No. I ran from my police detail and bought a train ticket. My wound was still fresh when I got here. I was worried more about finding a job and surviving to the next day. Dealing with the emotional scars of being raped and almost killed wasn’t really high on my priority list. I went to therapy and talked to Dr. Williams, but I guess that didn’t do much because look where we are now. ”
“After what Blaize did, it’s your body reacting now. You can try to ignore it, but you will still live with it.”
“You sound like you speak from experience.” I bit my lip as the words escaped me. “I’m sorry. That’s none of my business.”
“No, you’re fine. I’ve dealt with a lot of tragedy in my life and never processed it, but I also had to protect my sister. I hate myself every day, being unable to protect her and letting her get hurt the way she did.”
“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I mumbled.
Annika brushed her hands through my hair as she looked at Drew. “I do, but I failed her, and I had to live with it. I know how it feels being defenseless while someone you love fights their demons alone.”
“You’re not alone anymore, Kadence,” Annika said as she took my hand. “You got a fucked up little family with a bunch of shared trauma. We heal each other every day. You don’t have to be scared anymore.”
Theo crouched down next to me. “We are all fucked up, but we are a family. You are a part of this family now, and we don’t let anyone suffer alone in their darkness.”
Annika reached for Noah’s hand and pulled him closer. “I am not letting you suffer alone. We are conjoined at the hip now.” Annika laughed. “You, me and my guys.” The family I always needed.