Chapter 22
KADENCE
Hues of honey invaded my mind, and in a sleepy haze, I pulled her down.
She was stiff, but I wanted her to hold me.
“Just be quiet for a little while and hold me.” I felt her nod as she crawled into the bed with me.
I pulled her closer to me, kicking a leg over her and nuzzling into her body.
I knew I needed to wake up and talk to her, to sit down and tell her how I felt and why it triggered me, to rip my heart out and let it bleed into her so she can understand why I did everything I did.
But that was a future me problem. Right now, I wanted this moment with Blaize, and then we could talk.
I dozed off to the sound of Blaize’s heartbeat and her nails scratching my scalp.
My eyes fluttered open once again, and I peered up to see Blaize watching me. “Hi,” I mumbled. “How long did I sleep?”
“You slept for an hour and a half.”
I nodded, pulling away from her and stretching before crawling out of the bed. “I don’t want this to be awkward. We can go to your place after I shower.”
Thirty minutes later, I couldn’t lollygag around anymore.
I slipped into a pair of tight jeans and a long-sleeved tee, pinning my hair up with a claw clip.
I needed to color it again; the blue was fading into a light teal and my brown roots were starting to show.
I walked out of the bathroom and Blaize had a bag on her back.
She must’ve packed clothes for me. It shouldn't make me swoon, but because it was her, it did.
I told her I was ready, and I walked out of the bedroom with her following closely behind me.
Annika stopped me, grabbing my shoulders and looking behind me, giving Blaize a I would end your bloodline look.
This version of Annika was actually terrifying, but I was grateful to have a friend that would go to war for me.
She was passionate about her anger even though I talked to her about it a lot.
I pulled Annika into my arms, giving her a tight, reassuring hug. “I’ll be back. I love you. Thank you.”
Blaize took my hand as I followed her out of the apartment.
My heart was beating outside of my chest. I was slightly terrified that Blaize was going to hurt me, but she came to me last night when no one else would.
She answered me immediately and sent her motorcycle club to keep watch until I was safely in her arms. It didn’t mean I fully forgave her, but it rebuilt a little of the trust that was broken.
I was still going to make her work for my forgiveness a little more, though.
My plans of bratting were ruined when I saw the black Harley Davidson she walked toward.
This bike was sleek and intense. All black chrome with Hades stamped onto the side in emerald green.
How the fuck did I not know she had a bike?
Was it na?ve of me to think the woman that lived in leather and was president of a motorcycle club wouldn’t have a bike that matched her cold personality?
I smirked at her as she handed me a purple helmet.
She knew exactly what she was doing. As I kicked my leg behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist, she smiled down at me.
I’d be lying if I said this feeling wasn’t amazing.
For the first time in a while I felt free, like I shed the weight I’ve been carrying.
The wind was loud enough to drown out the screaming in my mind, silencing my demons and thoughts for just a moment.
I had to trust Blaize not to kill me when a month ago…
Our relationship was…touchy right now, but I was going to make her pay for what she did, one way or another.
I just couldn’t deny the intense pull we had.
As soon as the bike came to a stop, I jumped off the seat, haphazardly losing my footing when I realized the ride made my legs feel like mush.
Blaize caught me in her arms, still straddling her bike.
It was like we were both in a trance, but I pushed away from her before anyone noticed.
She hit the kickstand on her bike and crawled off it.
She shouldn’t look this hot, but she was clouding my mind and judgment as she effortlessly dismounted from the Harley, looking absolutely perfect.
I followed Blaize upstairs to her office, my heart rate picking up with every step closer.
Being alone with her was intimidating after everything we’d been through.
She had me follow her through the door, to the opposite end of her office.
There was a door here, something I assumed was always a bathroom or storage closet, but she opened it to reveal another sizable room.
I cocked my brow and followed her into the unfamiliar space.
The area opened up into a lavish home with dark grey walls accented with emerald green and gold.
The living room was spacious, with black velvet sofas, shelves filled with leather bound books, and pictures that added an aura of Blaize into the mix.
As I took in the surroundings, I noticed there was also a gym, kitchen, and what I was guessing was her bedroom down the hallway.
My eyes found a pretty blonde and a little girl in the pictures with a smiling, happy Blaize, not the moody, unemotional woman I knew.
Maybe, unemotional wasn’t the right word, because she sure as hell acted on emotions weeks prior and when she cornered me in the bathroom.
Her emotions were fiery and explosive, but she concealed them until they became nuclear.
The little girl had her eyes and her dark hair. Did she carry her?
“My daughter was an energetic little girl. She was Olivia’s mini me, even though she looked like me.”
“Did you carry her?”
She shook her head. “Olivia did, but we used my eggs. She had a hard time conceiving and she miscarried three times. Our doctor told us to try mine, and if it didn’t work, then I would have carried.”
“What happened to them?”
“Elijah West.” There was that name again.
Who the fuck was Elijah, and why was he an asshole?
“He reigned over the territories before we moved to Westhaven. I took control, and he didn’t like it.
” She looked at the picture of her family.
“Five years ago, he killed them. Charlee died first, and then he raped my wife before he killed her.”
“Blaize, I—”
She gave me a soft smile that didn’t reach her eyes.
“It’s okay. I held Olivia before she died.
She wasn’t alone when she took her last breath, and Charlee had her mama with her.
It wasn’t the life I wanted for my family, but I loved them with my entire soul.
I couldn’t save them when it mattered.” She sighed looking back at me.
“That’s why you mortified me, Kadence. I never felt that spark, that desire to care for another person until I met you. ”
This was the part of Blaize I wanted to know, but I didn’t expect it to be this heartbreaking. The woman, who was terrified of loving me, was afraid because she didn’t want to experience that agony again.
“Blaize, your care was kinda shitty.”
“I never learned how to deal with a crush.” She chuckled. “I didn’t even know what my feelings for you truly were until I couldn’t get you off my mind.” She extended her hand. “Come on.”
Blaize took me to the other room which had a black, four poster bed with a metal headboard frame. Her bedroom didn’t look like the rooms at the club
I turned to see Blaize, slowly unbuttoning her shirt, exposing her canvas of tattoos and…
scars. She had smaller scars that looked like stab and bullet wounds, but there was a ragged pink scar going vertically up her torso, jagged in some places until it stopped just under her breast. With the shadows and her other tattoos I never saw it in the club, and she was never undressed when we slept together.
She unbuttoned her leather pants, sliding them down her long, toned legs.
I really should be questioning her, demanding answers, but I was entranced by her beauty and the skin I had never had the chance to see.
Her arm sleeves were gorgeous, but what captured my eyes was the dragon on her hip, its tail starting at her upper hip and stopping on her ribs just under her left breast. The dragon barely covered the scar, only a few of the details touching the pale pink.
Her other leg was covered with more floral work and skulls.
Hearts shaped by fingerprints form the pistils of three of the daisies woven into the design.
She was covered in ink, yet she never covered the scar?
With her semi-naked in front of me, I got a better view of the scar as it started at her left inner thigh and snaked up her body like the dragon, only some of the top was covered because of the dragon’s head.
Did she keep the scar uncovered for some reason?
A message or a symbol? Blaize smirked at me, catching me fawning at her body, making my cheeks burn.
“What are you doing?”
“I am allowing myself to be vulnerable.”
“Why?”
“Because I hurt you.”
“And stripping half-naked is supposed to help me, how?” Shut up, Kadence, and enjoy the show.
Her lips curled. “I can put my clothes back on, if you’d like.”
“No.”
“No one sees me like this, Kadence. This is part of my shield that I wear.”
I gave her a perplexed look. “You’re a domme. Don’t your submissives see you naked?”
“I am how I was with you—fully clothed bringing them pleasure,” she said. She unclipped the front of her bra, removing the straps and letting it fall to the ground. “This is my way of showing you a part of myself no one sees.”
My breath snagged in my throat at the sight of her perfect breasts.
A hint of silver caught my eye, and I gaped at the nipple piercings.
They were a simple silver barbell, but goddamn were they hot.
Only a small scrap of thin, black fabric prevented her from being completely naked, and I wanted to watch her pull that tiny black thong down her legs and show me every part of her. I shook the thought from my head.
Was it bad to fall to my knees and beg for a taste?
Yes. I wasn’t giving in this easily. It didn’t matter how hot she was or how distracting her tits were or how bad my mouth was watering for a taste.
Blaize hurt me, but she also saved me. I stepped away from her, walking to the furthest end of the room.
It put distance between us, and I folded my arms across my chest.
“I’m sorry, princess. I never wanted to hurt you.”
It was time to regain my control and have Blaize pay for her sins.
“Crawl.”