Chapter 23 Promises
Tristan
Cade squeezed Tristan tightly and vowed, "I told you, Tris. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always stay. As long as you want me."
The quiet words wrapped around Tristan's heart like a promise, and he forgot how to breathe. He peered up at Cade as hope bubbled in his chest.
"Does that mean... you've decided? About us?"
Cade's face scrunched up the tiniest bit, his gaze wary, probing. "This life, my job, you're sure you're okay with it?"
Tristan's voice scraped past the emotion lodged in his throat. "Yes, I don't care. I just want to be with you."
The guarded expression dissolved, leaving only the hard, decisive set of Cade's jaw. "Okay then. If you're sure it's what you want, then I'll try."
Joy swelled in Tristan's heart till it overflowed and permeated every cell in his body. "I am," he answered, his words soft but certain.
"Listen, Tris, I need to tell you I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For letting you go to the house. It's my fault that the Handler found you. I should have made you stay with Annabeth."
Tristan was shaking his head, irritated, before Cade even finished his apology. "First of all, there's no 'letting' me and 'made' me. If we're going to be together, we're partners and equals. We make decisions together. And second, it was my fault. I insisted, and I gave you the puppy dog eyes."
Cade's face morphed into a scowl. "You little shit... "
Chuckling, Tristan said, "You shouldn't have admitted what a sucker you are for them."
Squinting, Cade accused, "You are a demon."
"Get used to it."
The words caused a flicker of something, maybe anticipation, in Cade's eyes, and Tristan couldn't help but grin.
He was about to suggest they head to bed when Cade got serious again. "I was worried about Natalie... that she wouldn't like me and you'd change your mind. But when I told her what I do, she seemed okay with it."
Wanting to allay those fears, Tristan assured him, "Yeah. She told me she likes you." The wobbly smile he got in return melted his heart.
"I like her too."
"She said you told her about us," Tristan asked, curious about what was said.
"Well, not everything, obviously, but I told her there was something between us. I couldn't lie to her. She's kind of scary when she's mad. Like you."
"Like our mom," Tristan added, chuckling. "She'd like you too."
"I doubt that," was the emphatic reply.
"She would. She'd love you because I do."
Cade squirmed, obviously uncomfortable, and Tristan briefly felt the urge to deflect, to change the subject. But then he decided his stupid boyfriend would just have to get used to him saying those words, because he would be saying them a lot.
"It's okay. You don't need to say it back," he murmured as he sank back into Cade's embrace, tucking his face into the crook of his neck. Sighing long and deep, he allowed himself to truly relax for the first time in nearly two weeks.
The familiar scent and the strength of firm muscles grounded him, enveloping him in quiet safety, and he murmured, "Thank you. For coming for me."
"You're mine, Tris. Nothing was going to stop me. I would have burned the world to ash to find you," Cade answered, kissing his temple.
Tristan's heart stammered as the words slammed into him, possessive and tender and exactly what he needed to hear.
"You told him that, too. You said I was yours."
Strong arms tightened around him. "You are. So you better make sure people know it, 'cause I'll have to kill anyone who touches you."
Tristan chuckled and kissed the warm skin under his lips. "You won't kill everyone who touches me, just the bad guys, right?"
Cade's noncommittal grunt had him laughing again, feeling lighter than he had since this ordeal began.
In the logical part of his brain, he recognized that the response should have set off warning sirens, but instead, it just felt right.
He liked knowing that his boyfriend would protect him, would keep him safe by any means necessary, and if that meant he was damaged or flawed in some way, he was okay with that. They could be damaged together.
With Tristan still snuggled up to him, Cade whispered a strangled confession. "Tris, I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how to be in a relationship."
Leaning back, Tristan met dark, questioning eyes and offered a lazy smile. "That's okay. I'll teach you."
Another scowl, bordering on a pout, and Tristan found it endearing that a trained assassin could look so unsure and adorable.
But he decided to keep that observation to himself.
"What if I mess up?"
"I'm sure you will. And I will too."
"And then what?"
"Then we'll figure it out, make up, have sex, and move on."
"That's how it works?" Cade asked, squinting in disbelief. "You just make up and forget it?"
"Yeah, for the most part. Unless you do something horrible."
"Tris, I do horrible things all the time. It's literally my job."
Cade sounded so disgruntled that Tristan snorted. "No, I meant something horrible to me. Like cheat on me."
"Why would I cheat when I have you? That's stupid."
Tristan's face flushed at the sincere, disarming statement.
"Keep saying stuff like that, too. It gets you bonus points," he rasped.
"Huh?"
"Just keep doing it. I like it."
"Okay, I guess. So you won't be mad when I make mistakes?"
"Oh, I'll probably be mad, but I'll get over it. We'll work it out, right?"
"How the fuck should I know? I literally just told you I'd never done this before."
Tristan couldn’t help but snort at the petulant expression, so endearing that he had to resist the urge to reach up and squish that gorgeous face between his hands.
"Stop saying 'literally,'" he teased.
Glaring, Cade insisted, "Tris, this is serious."
Tristan stifled another chuckle and placed a quick kiss on those pursed lips. "We will. We'll work it out."
"If you say so."
"I do. Now, let's head to bed. I want to shower first because I feel disgusting. Do you need a shower too?"
"Yeah, that'd be great."
Tristan showed Cade to the bathroom, then lay on the bed, trying to stay awake. A few minutes later, Cade found him in his bedroom wearing only boxer briefs and a tight t-shirt. Despite his fatigue, Tristan's gaze trickled down to Cade's thighs, and he felt a buzz of desire.
Would he ever get used to the beauty of Cade's body? He hoped not.
Dragging himself upright, he told Cade, "Make yourself comfortable. I won't be long."
Cade stopped him as he passed, tilted his chin up and placed a soft kiss on his lips. "Take your time."
Tristan's heart was still fluttering from that kiss as he entered the bathroom and stripped.
While the water heated, he tossed his clothes into a heap and debated whether he should throw them in the trash or maybe burn them to avoid the memories they might trigger.
He washed quickly, eager for his own bed after a week.
And Cade.
It had only been seven days, but it seemed like a lifetime ago when he first encountered Cade at Wilson's house. So much had happened, and he knew he would need time to unpack it all.
But not tonight. Tonight, he needed sleep and the comfort of his man.
The idea that Cade was really his now made him smile even as a slow shiver slid up his spine.
Drying his body, he realized he didn't have clean clothes in the bathroom with him. Again. He really needed to break that habit. Or not.
Too tired to worry, he brushed his teeth and returned to his bedroom with the towel wrapped around his waist. He found Cade lying on top of the covers in black boxer briefs, his hands folded under his head, his snug t-shirt clinging to his biceps and accentuating his pecs so exquisitely that Tristan felt a zing of desire.
Forgoing modesty, he dropped his towel and pulled on a pair of boxers out of his dresser. Turning, he saw Cade's eyes rake over him with appreciation.
"Reminds me of the first time I saw you naked," his boyfriend commented, his sultry tone making Tristan's dick twitch.
"Yeah?" he prompted as he climbed into bed facing him. "What did you think that first time?"
Rolling so they lay nose to nose, Cade reached out and threaded his fingers through damp, red locks. "That you were gorgeous. Perfect."
The words twisted Tristan's stomach in knots and blanketed his skin with goosebumps.
"You keep using that word," he murmured, unable to believe it applied to him.
"It's true. That's what I thought. That's what I still think."
As he soaked in the truth of Cade's declaration, the world suddenly righted on its axis, and it struck him that he didn't need to be perfect, neither of them did; it only mattered that they were perfect to each other, for each other.
He didn't know what to say, couldn't find the appropriate response to that sweet, honest statement.
"Oh," was all he could manage.
Cade reached out to graze his thumb over one dark circle under Tristan's eye. "You look like shit. You should go to sleep. I want to know everything that happened, and I know you have questions for me too, but it can wait till tomorrow."
"Yeah, it can wait," Tristan agreed as he nuzzled his cheek into the large, rough palm.
Cade scooted closer until their chests pressed together. His eyes held Tristan's as he leaned over to press their lips together in a soft, nibbling kiss. He didn't push, didn't demand anything, only waited for Tristan to react, giving him a choice to break the kiss and go to sleep, or...
Threading his fingers through short dark hair, Tristan tugged gently as he deepened the kiss. Cade groaned and met his tongue and lips with equal fervor, and their mouths tangled as their bodies crushed together, seeking more friction, more contact, more of each other.
"Cade," he breathed out when the other man released his mouth to kiss across his jaw to his ear.
"Hmm?" Cade hummed, licking and kissing Tristan's skin.
"I want you."
"Me too. I missed you so much while you were gone. I was so scared and... "
"I'm sorry you went through that. I'm sorry... "