Chapter 29
Helena woke to an empty bed and the sound of swimming.
She pulled on a t-shirt and walked to the terrace to see Caitlin in the pool, swimming lengths, back and forth, the morning sun making the water glitter around her. Helena noted with quiet satisfaction that she was naked… following her standing orders.
Helena went back inside to make coffee and then sat on a sun lounger with their two cups, watching. She counted fifteen lengths before Caitlin noticed her and stopped at the edge, pushing her dark, wet hair back from her face.
“Morning.”
“Morning. How long have you been out here?”
“Half an hour maybe. I woke up early and you looked too peaceful, not to mention beautiful, to disturb.” Caitlin rested her arms on the pool edge, chin on her forearms, looking up at Helena.
Water dripped from her hair and the necklace sat against her wet skin.
“I forgot how good it feels to swim in the morning. In Houston I use the gym pool sometimes and it’s all lane ropes and people and a timer on the wall.
This…” She gestured at the garden, the trees and the ocean beyond them. “This is different.”
“Everything is different here.” Helena sat forward and held out the coffee cup. “Come and drink this before it gets cold.”
Caitlin pulled herself out of the pool and walked to the terrace, taking the towel Helena offered and draping it around her shoulders without drying off. She sat on the lounger next to Helena, their legs touching, and they drank their coffee in the warm morning silence.
This was their last morning alone. By mid-afternoon Mariana would arrive, and Juliana, and Mariana’s friends, and this would cease to be their private world.
The main house would open up, the property would fill with the chaos that Mariana brought to every gathering, and Helena and Caitlin would, for the first time, be a couple in front of them all.
“I want to hold on to this,” Helena said after a while. “I wish we could slow this down.”
“Why?”
“I’m really looking forward to everyone else arriving, it’ll be great, but these couple of days have been special. I want them to last forever.”
“Me too.” Caitlin took a sip of her coffee and looked at Helena. “What time do they arrive?”
“Mariana said mid-afternoon. Three or four, probably. She’s driving down with Juliana and two friends.”
“Juliana.” Caitlin’s voice was neutral, but there was a forced tone underneath it.
“Are you ok with that? Genuinely.”
“Genuinely, yes. I’m curious to meet her. You’ve told me about her and I’d rather meet the reality than keep imagining the version in my head.” Caitlin smiled. “The version in my head is probably a massive caricature of the real thing.”
“There’s a version in your head?”
“The twenty-three-year-old psychology student with wild curls who you’ve been sleeping with for months and who apparently is so awesomely dominant that even you, the most naturally dominant woman I’ve ever met, kneel for her. That version.”
Helena laughed kindly. “She’s going to be far less intimidating than that in person. She’ll probably talk to you about her research within the first ten minutes. She’s… unique. You’ll get on great.”
“I’m looking forward to it. Honestly.” Caitlin paused. “And Mariana?”
“Mariana will be… Mariana. She’s protective of me, which means she’ll be distant when she meets you. She’ll warm up quickly, don’t worry, she does that with everyone, but the first hour or two might be slightly cool.”
“Cool I can handle. I’ve sat through hostile client meetings. Your sister doesn’t scare me.”
“My sister scares me. She’s the most formidable person in our family, including my mother, and that’s saying something.”
“Then I’ll bring my A-game.” Caitlin finished her coffee and put the cup down, letting the towel slip off her shoulders as she did. “What should we do with our last few hours of solitude?”
“Swim. Lie in the sun. Maybe walk into town for breakfast.”
“All of that. Yes please.” Caitlin hesitated. “I want to say something first though.”
Helena’s pulse quickened. “Say it.”
Caitlin turned on the lounger to face her, one leg tucked under her.
The morning sun was behind her, catching the wet strands of her hair and the water droplets on her naked skin.
Despite being naked, despite what they’d done in the week or so since that first night in Miami, she looked every inch the force of nature that Helena had fallen for all those months before.
“I’ve been thinking about this since I arrived, but it crystallised yesterday walking home in the moonlight.” She paused. “I want to do this, Helena. Live like this. Be with you.”
Helena felt her breath catch. “Caitlin…”
“Let me finish. I don’t mean move to S?o Paulo tomorrow.
I don’t mean upend my life or quit my job or do anything impulsive.
I’m a partner in a consultancy… impulsive isn’t in my vocabulary.
” She smiled. “What I mean is… I guess this works. Us. Not just… that. You know, the physical side.” Her smile widened into a grin. “Although yeah… the physical side.”
“We’re pretty good in bed, aren’t we?” Helena smiled back.
“Yeah, and out of it. Even in the ocean apparently. And the dominant submissive thing is incredible. But it is so much more. Talking together, cooking together, just being together. The way you show me you, really, truly you, and the way you see everything about who I really am, you see me at my most vulnerable, and you don’t flinch. ”
“I’d never flinch.”
“I know. That’s what I’m saying.” Caitlin took Helena’s hand.
“I’m saying that I can see a future with you.
A real one. Not a work fling, not a holiday romance.
A life. I don’t know what shape it takes yet, I don’t know how we solve for the distance, but I know that what I want is to solve for it.
With you. I suppose… I know we kind of said this last night, but I wanted to make sure that you know.
I don’t want this week to be the end of a fling.
I want it to be the start of something truly special, and I want to commit to that. If you want that too?”
Helena looked at this woman and felt something inside her crystallise that she wasn’t sure she’d ever quite felt before. This was fast, but their discussion at dinner the night before had set them on this path, and it was a path she absolutely wanted to go down, whatever it took.
“I can see that future too,” Helena said. “I’ve been seeing it all week. The start of something special sounds good, doesn’t it? You fit, Caitlin. Everywhere I put you, you fit.”
“That’s either very romantic or you’re describing me like a piece of furniture.”
“Very romantic. Definitely very romantic.”
Caitlin laughed, and Helena pulled her close.
“We should tidy before we do anything else.”
“You mean the… play things?”
“I mean exactly the play things,” Helena replied.
“I suppose Mariana or one of her friends coming into the pool house and finding a spreader bar under the couch might open a few eyes…”
Helena looked at her. “I didn’t bring the spreader bar.”
“Shame.”
“I packed light. Just the scarves, the harness, and a few essential toys.”
“Your version of essentials and everyone else’s version of essentials are very different things, Minha Dona. Very different things indeed.”