Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
MICAH
“What do you want to do with these?”
Jester peers over the stack of cardboard boxes stacked high in his arms. “Are they going into storage?” he continues, “or do you want them at Rogue and Sofia’s for now?”
Ruby sets a bubble-wrapped plate in the open box at her feet and turns to look at him. Her brow furrows in concentration as she thinks. “They can go into storage. But you don’t have to carry so many at once. We can come back another day to finish.”
“This is nothing,” he replies with a grin. “I doubt they weigh a hundred pounds combined. And besides.” He glances across the room at Houdini, who’s about to lift a stack of six large boxes. “I’ve got a bet going to see who can move more. Loser has to buy pizza and beer for everyone.”
Houdini looks over at Jester. “You’re not going to win. I’m already twelve boxes ahead and we’re over halfway done.”
“You guys bet on who could carry more boxes?” Ruby asks.
Already headed towards the front door of Ruby’s apartment, Jester glances over his shoulder at us. “Since Knight’s decided to be lazy, we thought a bet might help make things go faster.”
“Lazy?” I toss a roll of tape at him. “I’m helping Ruby pack.”
“Micah can’t carry heavy things yet,” Ruby says. “Doctor’s orders.” Her nose crinkles as she makes a little face at Jester. “Do you want Micah to have lasting muscle damage?”
“Of course not.” He grins at her. “Then I won’t be able to beat him fair and square the next time we spar.”
“Beat me?” I shake my head. “Fat chance. You should hope I have muscle damage. Then you might actually stand a chance of winning.”
Houdini snorts. “Are you guys going to actually work? Or is this all a ploy to get me to do all of it?”
“It’s a ploy,” Jester replies cheerfully as he heads into the hallway. “You caught us.”
“I’m getting the most expensive pizza in the city.” Houdini replies with a smile. “The one with the truffles and edible gold. And some of that mead from the brewery down the street from F&F. You know, the one that costs fifty dollars a bottle?”
“I’ll cover it,” I say. “Since I’m the one who can’t move anything.
” Not that I don’t want to. And if Ruby weren’t here, I’d probably ditch the sling and carry my fair share.
But it’s only been two weeks since I was shot, and Ruby is still in full-on worry mode.
Every time she catches me lifting anything heavier than a feather, she scolds me about it.
“The doctor said it’s important not to push yourself too quickly,” she’ll remind me. “It could cause permanent damage to your muscles. You need to take it easy.”
I can’t be upset about her worrying, because if the positions were reversed, I’d be ten times as bad. If Ruby got shot—
My gut twists.
The very thought of a bullet tearing through Ruby’s body makes me feel sick all over.
Most nights, I have nightmares about it—of Henry turning the gun on her instead of me, of the bullet striking her, of her collapsing to the ground, covered in blood—that have me waking in a near-panic, convinced it actually happened.
That’s why I agreed to go to counseling, at Ruby’s suggestion.
One night last week, after a particularly bad nightmare, she brought it up.
“It’s helping me,” she said. “Not just with the nightmares and flashbacks. But with the guilt.” When I started to respond, she hurried to add, “I know we’re trying to let the guilt go.
But it’s hard. Talking with Mabel helps.
Maybe if you talk to her, or someone else you feel comfortable with, it might help you too. ”
So I said yes, I’d try it. I’ve only had one appointment so far, but already, I think it’s going to help.
“I’ll cover it,” Ruby insists. “It’s my stuff, after all. Isn’t it tradition to buy beer and pizza for everyone who helps you move?”
“Rue, I’ve got it.” Yes, I know she can afford some pizza and beer, even the ridiculously priced stuff Houdini mentioned. But I don’t want Ruby to pay for it. I want to do it myself.
“Micah.” She arches her brows. “You guys are helping me move. That means I cover pizza and beer. And whatever else you want.”
“Fine.” I’m not going to argue about it. “But Houdini’s not buying truffle pizza with gold shit on it. He can have the regular pies from Gio’s.”
“Don’t you mean Pete’s?” Ruby asks. Her lips twitch. “If I’m ordering, then I’m getting pizza from Pete’s.”
“That’s not the name of an authentic pizza joint,” I grumble.
“Pete might be short for Pietro,” she offers. “Would that make it better?”
“It might.” Setting my roll of bubble wrap down, I pull Ruby into a one-armed hug and kiss her. “I’ll have to ask Rogue to look into it. See if Pete really is Pietro.”
She kisses me back. “Or I could just ask the next time I’m there.”
“I guess.” Surveying the room, I try to calculate how many more boxes we’ll need. “I think I’ll ask one of the guys to pick up some more boxes. I’m not sure we have enough.”
“We don’t have to do it all today. I already said that.” As Ruby glances around the living room, her smile droops a little. “I can always tell the realtor to hold off on listing it. If we need more time to pack, that is.”
My heart tugs at the sad look in her eyes. “Rue.” I cup her cheek. “You don’t have to sell. You could keep it. Rent it out. Or if you want, we can live here.” I think for a second. “I can add more security. Reinforce the windows. It wouldn’t be hard.”
She stares at the molding around the doorway to the kitchen before turning back to me. “No. I need to sell. I wouldn’t feel safe living here. And it’s too small. We need more room for Sampson.”
Our plan is to sell both of our places and find a new one together—one without memories of Henry and all the violence he caused.
When we talked about it shortly after I left the hospital, Ruby confessed she was afraid to go back to her apartment.
“I know it’s safe,” she said. “But I don’t think I can go back there.
I’ll always be worrying. I’ll always look at the fire escape and wonder. ”
I didn’t want her coming back here, either.
I could say it was because of her PTSD, and that would be true.
But it’s more than that. I want Ruby to live with me.
I want to be there for her when she has a nightmare.
I want to wake up every morning with her in my arms. I want everything I got used to in the weeks she stayed with me to continue.
So I asked Ruby to move in with me. “We can sell my place, too,” I explained. “After everything, I don’t want to stay here either. We can find a place together. Another condo. Or maybe a brownstone, like Rogue and Sofia have.”
“With a little yard for Sampson?” she asked. “And do you think we could find one with a solarium?”
“We could absolutely find a place with both,” I told her. And I will. I don’t care how much it costs. If Ruby wants a yard and a solarium, I’ll make sure she has them.
With that agreed on, I put my condo on the market.
Ruby got in touch with a realtor. And since I didn’t want Ruby potentially getting triggered by going back to my place, we moved in with Rogue and Sofia temporarily.
Which is actually working out really well, because now Ruby has Sofia close by for extra support when she needs it.
Not that I don’t want to give it to her. But Sofia understands in a way I can’t. And Rogue told me the other day that he thinks it’s helping Sofia, too. “It’s still hard for Soph,” he confided. “She doesn’t like to admit it. But having Ruby here… I think it’s helping Sofia, too.”
With a small, resigned sigh, Ruby says, “It’s better to sell. Plus, I need the money to put towards our new place.”
“You don’t need to—” I start.
“Micah.” She gives me a gently stern look. “I want to. It’s important to me.”
“I just don’t want you to regret selling this place,” I tell her. “I know you shared a lot of memories with your dad here.”
“I do. But I have more memories here.” She rests her hand over her heart. “And those I’ll carry wherever I go.”
My chest squeezes. “Rue.”
Her eyes shine a little as she smiles at me. “It’s okay. I’m a little sad, but I’m happy, too. Moving in with you, finding a place together… Those are exciting things. Things to look forward to.”
“They are,” I agree. Drawing her close again, I kiss her forehead. “I’m definitely looking forward to living with you. In our own place.” With a smirk, I add, “Where we can have sex anywhere we want.”
Desire heats her gaze. “Maybe we’ll put up some of that one-way window film? So we can have sex while we watch the sun come up?”
My dick jumps to attention. “I think that could be arranged.”
Ruby’s face lights up. “Good.” Then she narrows her eyes at me. “But not yet. Not until the doctor says it’s safe.”
“Oh, I think it’s safe now,” I reply, my voice going rough. I cup her ass, pulling her against my erection. “In fact, I think sex would be medicinal.”
“Micah.” Her cheeks flush pink. “Jester and Houdini could be back any second.”
“I can tell them to take a break. Grab some coffee. Some overpriced pizza.”
From Ruby’s thoughtful expression, I can tell she’s thinking about it. But after a few seconds, she shakes her head while smiling ruefully. “We can’t. They’re here to help. And anyway, the doctor said we should wait at least another week.”
I knew I shouldn’t have let Ruby come to my last doctor’s appointment with me. Then I could have told her I got the all-clear, and she’d be none the wiser.
Except I don’t lie to Ruby. I don’t hide things, even if I’m worried the truth might upset her. Because if I want us to work out in the long-term, which I do, it’s important that we’re honest with each other.
Ruby steps out of my arms and turns her attention back to the dishes she’s packing. “I’d better get something done before the guys get back. Or they really will think it’s a ploy to get them to do everything.”
“They don’t mind,” I reply while surreptitiously adjusting myself. “They just like to give me shit.”