21. Chapter 21
Chapter twenty-one
Sadie
“Your safe word’s ‘red.’”
I don’t know what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t the dread rolling in my belly and coiling around my bones in thick swaths. They’re ice-cold layers, drawing a shiver out of me, awaiting the heat of his fury.
Dilated pupils stare through me as I taste the remnants of lust-induced worry on Elias’s breath. He doesn’t want this—to touch me when he’d rather run like everyone else in my life. Fucking coward.
Asshole made the mistake of obsessing over me, now look at him—unraveling at the seams while trying to gorilla-grip his composure.
He isn’t going anywhere; he may physically leave in the next few hours, but he tied himself to me.
I’ll be damned if I let that declaration go without him honoring every word.
Not now that I wear his visible claim, the necklace he clasped around my throat the first night we fucked, and not when my demons finally found a way to jab at his.
He. Is. Mine.
Ours.
Ours.
Elias Sullivan, my Moros.
With gentle hands built to wield doom as he walks about Earth’s many faces. His death will be tied to mine. I’ll break all that’s left of the young man who left home and came back a withered soldier. He claimed my body, the demons have my head, and I’ll have both his heart and soul.
“W…what’s a safe word?” I ask innocently enough.
I have an idea but I need him to spell it out for me—this is what he’s hungry for, compulsion. Owning a woman he has no right being with. He thinks he’s in control, but I’m the one with claws stabbing so deep into him he’s confused them with his own.
“It’s your get out of jail free card. Use it and everything stops.
Doesn’t matter what I’m doing. I could be punishing you, fucking you into the goddamn mattress, forcing you down on my cock, tormenting your senses, or anything in between.
If it hurts beyond what you enjoy, too intense for you to handle, you say ‘red’ and it ends. Do you understand?”
“Y…yes.”
“What’s the word, Sadie?”
“R..red.”
“Good girl. Open your mouth. You wanted my cock out, now you’re going to take it down that greedy fucking throat.”
His hand tugs at my long strands, pulling the roots until they sting and protest at the verge of being plucked from my scalp. I love the bite of pain that comes with his affection. It’s what I deserve for being the…thing…I am.
Some women are born out of softness with plush blankets, cloud-like pillows, and loving arms to protect them from a harsh world.
Others are given the tools they need to heal from families that caused too much damage, limping through life and barely getting by.
Then there’s the rest of us. Hurt is all we know and will ever know.
We’ve learned to sugarcoat pain with hopes, dreams, and false promises.
He wants to hurt us—my demons and I.
Religious leaders claim God gives his toughest battles to his strongest warriors, but between you and I, this is how God creates the very devils he and his followers shun. The Lord, well he thrives from devotion while I survive on blood and hatred.
My tongue drapes over the sharp edges of my teeth once my lips part and my jaw lowers enough to take him. Saliva pools under the slick muscle at the rasp of his fly followed by the weight of his cock filling my mouth.
There’s no finesse as Elias feeds himself to the back, the flared tip pressing hard against my tonsils to cut off my air supply.
Holding himself deep, my stomach heaves when I choke around him.
Hot tears blur my vision, but I blink them away despite my last breath finally depleting and setting fire to my lungs.
Retreating, I gag and cough. Spittle flies out and splatters on his semi-covered hips, just inches above where my hands have anchored to his thighs for support and my means to back out.
“Put your fucking hands down, Sadie,” he scolds me.
I immediately obey despite every urge to squeeze, and claw, and shred his muscles straight off the bone.
Jerking me forward again, he jams his cock into my mouth where my throat screams with discomfort.
Drool fills what’s left of the space, thoroughly coating his flesh before seeping from the corners of my lips and cleaving a messy trail to my chin.
I love this.
Anticipation paired with punishment is driving me wild.
Leaving me stranded on the edge of Hell Mountain where I’m picturing my plummet into the next level of purgatory.
Still, he doesn’t move, warming his dick in the saliva-filled cavern on a face I don’t recognize anymore.
Eye to eye with his pelvis, they roll aimlessly then meet his and I swear he sucks in a breath.
My compliance stiffens his cock enough to embed the memory of his veins into my tongue.
For a fleeting moment, pride dilates my pupils at the way he reacts to me.
I can’t stop myself from rubbing my thighs together, fervid and athirst.
“That’s better. Enjoy it while it lasts. You’ve got ten seconds before I ruin what’s left of your mouth.”
My nostrils flare. I want to fight him, to bare my teeth and chew through his velvety flesh. Then have the gumption to demand more.
“I see that evil gleam in your eye. If you know what’s good for you, you won’t,” he warns, guiding me back for the last inch or two of his cock to rest humiliatingly between my pouts.
“Time’s up.”
His free hand supports the underside of my jaw where long, cruel fingers compress my cheeks and pry my teeth apart, gaping my mouth for his thrusts. Drool spills disgustingly over my bottom lip. It froths with friction and slicks the lower half of my face with every snap of his hips.
My stomach and chest muscles contract against my will, urging me to cough and send bile burning up my esophagus.
Resisting, tears I’ve tried to blink away track down my cheeks, leaving briny trails behind.
When they drip onto my chest, my shirt sucks them into the fibers before either one of us notices where they land.
Bristly, cropped hairs scrape my chin and bottom lip when he surges all the way in. My tonsils refute him, making him work for what he wants as he sighs deeply and rocks into my face.
“Fuuuuuuuuck,” he groans. “That’s my good little cock sucker. Relax your throat, Sunshine, let me in.”
Easing back, he tries again. Then again, and again. Every forward thrust, my hands rise, poised to drive him back if I can’t take anymore. A flash of danger crosses over his handsome face, the last warning I get. In my last shred of obedience, my hands never make contact and fall to my lap.
“Hmph. Looks like we’ll be at this all night. Relax. Your. Throat.” His thrusts punctuate his words, gagging me.
The fuck does he think I am? I can’t just…relax on demand. Not when my entire focus is on staving off my vomit. Elias abruptly withdraws. His dick slips from my swollen lips with drool that spills chaotically over them. I can’t help but cough, gasp for air, and swallow in quick succession.
“Look at you. A fucking mess and all you’ve done is gag. Is that your hold up? Won’t let me in because you’re scared of reflexes?”
“Fuck you.” I suck in another breath. “I’m not scared.”
Irked by my response, Elias counters my attitude with two fingers jamming into my mouth. He rams past the nerve endings at the back of my tongue and through the small opening between my tonsils.
My whole body seizes with discomfort—retching muscles contract to hold back my bile. I don’t dare bite or clamp my lips around his digits; instead, my red-rimmed eyes hone in on him through the aggressive degradation.
“There we go. Jus’ like that.”
Elias lowers into a crouch, crowding my space as he watches me defy all instinct to snap his fingers off. Debased, salivating, and my face wrecked with the evidence of my weakness, there’s nowhere else I rather be. I want him here, with me, descending into nothing for the sake of belonging.
I want him.
Whatever fucked-up shit is between us, I need it. It’s the very breath he denies me as liberation sings in the distance.
“Not so mouthy now. No begging or pleading. Just a kneeling, pink-faced, wreck,” he goads.
Like the asshole he is, Elias leans in and rakes his nose through my hair with hot puffs of air, settling near my ear. Tirelessly, abused knuckles scrape over the sharp edge of my teeth as he owns me.
“I can smell how wet you are. Drenched from me fucking your pretty mouth?”
I could lie; shake my head, close my eyes, and act as if I’m unphased. But I know the fib won’t hold up. He’s nowhere near done and the thought thrills me to no end.
So, I shake my head.
“No? Not a fan of liars. If I strip you down and spread you apart, you won’t be soaked from front to back?”
Thrust.
Thrust.
Thrust.
My mouth aches.
“I find that hard to believe. You have one more chance, and if you lie…” His words trail off.
Steady on the balls of his feet, rich green eyes lock onto the cracks in my facade. His stare’s a silent threat, hanging like ripe fruit, and I’m starving.
“‘L…Lias.”
“Wrong answer.”
Without warning, he shoots up and towers over me. One boot shifting to the outside of each knee, practically straddling me where I kneel. The suddenness makes me flinch but I don’t get too far while he’s still fisting my hair.
His dick taunts me as he strokes himself with a firm grip an inch or two away from my mouth—I’m bewitched, watching him pleasure himself.
Slap.
Hot and fierce humiliation scorches through me. Surprise illuminates my face when I look up to him, only for him to slap his heavy cock against my cheek again. A phantom imprint feels like a fresh brand blistering my skin—look at this cock slut.
Elias capitalizes on my moment of disbelief by feeding his cock back into my mouth, this time he shows no mercy. Fucking my throat full of precum and drool, the vulgar squelch spurring him on. I heave and gurgle on my screams, when my hands disobey and force him back.