Chapter Twenty-Four
“You are going out to dinner with the robot?” Rani asks, sitting on the end of my bed as I rifle through the collections of
outfits she has supplied me with.
“Yes,” I say, drawing out a mint green ball gown that comes down to my ankles. “You realise you didn’t bring any smart casual
clothes, like something I can wear out to dinner that is cool and sexy, and not giving off unemployed royalty vibes.”
“Well, we didn’t have dinner with a robot on the itinerary until now.” Rani thinks for a moment. “Does he eat food?”
“Yes, because he’s not a robot, he’s a . . .” I try to avoid the word “replicant.”
“Replicant,” Rani says.
“No, he’s a bioengineered miracle,” I say, feeling an interesting urge to defend him. “And he’s kind of cute.”
“You fancy a robot?” Rani muses. “I did not see this coming. And yet, on the other hand, it is very you.”
“Very me to find a tall, muscular, intelligent, square-jawed blond attractive? Sue me.” I laugh. “Have you seen his thighs?”
Getting off the bed, Rani bumps me out of the way with a swing of her hips and dives deeper into the rack of dresses.
“I’m sure there’s a natty little sixties cocktail dress in here . . . ah-ha!” She pulls out a promising black minidress, shot
through with silver thread and finished with a nice cowl neckline. “So, he’s like a sort of high-end sex doll . . .” Rani
muses as she holds the dress up against me. “Yes, this is perfect. Sets off your porcelain skin and makes the most of your
long legs. Sorted.” She throws the dress on the bed.
“No, Rani, Hal is not like a sex doll at all.” I go and pick the dress up and stand in front of a long mirror. “Sex dolls
are . . . They don’t have thoughts or feelings and they . . . Anyway, this is too short. It was made for a shorter person.
That skirt will only just about cover my backside.”
“Exactly!” Rani exclaims, before adding, “Though we don’t want Hal to overheat on your first date. Although I am very curious
to know how robot sex works.”
She dives back into the wardrobe.
“This is not about sex!” I protest. “Not yet, at least. It’s about the meeting of minds. Hal has advanced the field of bioengineering
by about a century just to ask me on a date. Is that not romantic?”
“I mean I don’t know. Is it?” Rani asks, appearing again, her hair mussed up by static. She is holding a lemon-yellow dress
printed all over with white daisies. “Or is it narcissistic personality disorder?”
“It’s not that. You’ve got to stop thinking of this as the script for a horror movie.
Hal isn’t scary. It’s just that as he was evolving, he got to know me, all of me.
All my terrible, weird, strange quirks and issues and he still likes me a lot.
Like imagine dating someone who just gets you right off the bat? Doesn’t that sound nice?”
“I hate to say it . . .” Rani hesitates.
“Go on,” I say.
“He likes you a lot because you are the only human being that he has ever known. Until now. Anyway, I think this late fifties
tea dress could be the right vibe for your date. Shows off your curves without giving them away.”
Taking the dress, I hold it against me.
“It’s true that I’m more or less the only human Hal knows really well. But also, I am the only human who knows him, and I
think he wants to be known, Rani. I think . . . I think Hal wants to be loved. But he doesn’t expect it, he isn’t demanding
it. He’s just asked me out on a date. Except we don’t have to do all the awkward ‘What is your favourite movie?’ small talk.”
“I sort of thought that’s what dating was, getting to know someone. That’s the fun part. Unless they are robots with control
issues.”
“He’s not a robot! And he’s not making me go out to dinner with him!” I laugh. “You know, the way he looks?”
“Textbook fitty, yeah.” Rani nods, walking behind me to twist and pin my hair into an updo.
“He modelled himself on the romantic hero in my favourite series of books when I was a teen. Rani, he made himself into my
dream come true.”
“Hmm,” Rani says. “It sounds a bit like when you are first dating someone and you pretend to be exactly the sort of person
they are looking for.”
“Who does that?” I ask, shocked.
Rani gives me a long sideways look. “Put that dress on. I think I’ve got the perfect shoes next door.”
“They are only perfect if they are flat and preferably designed for running!” I call after, but she doesn’t listen. She returns
a moment later with a pair of white open-toe sandals with kitten heels.
“I just had a profound realisation,” she tells me.
“Was it that I cannot walk in heels?” I ask, sitting down to try the shoes on.
“I keep telling you, all you have to do is lock your knees,” Rani says. “Anyway, what about the Forrest revelation? That changes
everything, right?”
“How?” I ask her. “I’m not even sure if he’s being completely honest about that. I mean, you were there. Did you realise he
was talking to himself?”
“If I’m honest, I didn’t actually hear what he said, but you were so upset and you are my best friend, so obviously I took
your side at once. Stand up.” Rani stands back to survey her handiwork with a satisfied nod. “And now, having got to know
Forrest just a little bit, it doesn’t seem like something a man like him would do. To call a virtual stranger stupid, I mean.
He seems like such an intentional and thoughtful person. So anyway, I’m glad I’m officially allowed to like him now.”
“What is your point?” I ask as she fluffs out the circle skirt. She’s right, the dress is perfect.
“His nemesis status is revoked!”
“It feels more complicated than that.” I frown. “Like if we had a chance to be friends, or even just get along, we missed
it, and that’s that.”
“Why are you overcomplicating the situation?” Rani asks. “Forrest’s a man you are obliged to see a couple of times a day for another week and a half. There are very low stakes here unless . . .” Rani leaps off the bed and thrusts her face into mine.
“You fancy Forrest!” she gasps in a sharp breath, covering her mouth with her hands. “Plot twist!”
“Of course I don’t fancy Forrest,” I say, realising that of course I do fancy Forrest in exactly the moment I’m denying it.
“Well, that’s a lie,” Rani tells me, crossing her arms. “Of course you fancy Forrest. You are an alive, straight woman and
he is a literal God among men. And it’s all his own work, no data-scraping attractiveness for Forrest.”
“Fine, I fancy Forrest,” I say. “Of course I do. He’s gorgeous. But that has no bearing on what I’m saying here. Even if it
did, his girlfriend is here, along with Artie . . .”
“His girlfriend?” Rani asks, looking around as if she might be in the room. “Where?”
“She’s brought Artie over to see Forrest!” I tell her. “Looks like a supermodel?”
“Oh my God, that’s his sister,” Rani says.
“How do you know?” I ask, startled.
“Well, firstly because they both won the gene Olympics and are both hot as hell in a very similar olive-skinned, dark curly
hair sort of way, and secondly because when I introduced myself to her, she said, ‘Hi, I’m River, Forrest’s sister.’”
“Oh, I haven’t actually talked directly to her,” I say.
“Because you fancy Forrest,” Rani says, as if she has just made the greatest discovery to ever be discovered in all of human
history.
“That is not the point!” I argue. “You fancy Forrest! I’m not reading any secret significance into that.”
“Because I am not torturing myself about whether or not Forrest and I might have missed our chance,” Rani says. “And that’s
why you shouldn’t go on a date with Hal.”
“Wait, what?” I’m confused.
“Look, Hal has spent more time with you than anyone else, including me for the last few years, and he realised you were missing
out, so he makes himself a body.”
“True if simplistic,” I say.
“Yes, but the reason you were missing out on some of the best bits of life is because of Hal, because you were spending so
much time with him in your lab. The moment you are forced into the real world, if you can call Castle Beaumont the real world,
you meet a man who pushes your buttons and rings your bells. You don’t need Hal, Ava. You need time off from Hal to find out
what’s out there for yourself. You’ve devoted years of your life to Hal already. Don’t sign away the rest of it before you’ve
had a chance to look around.”
“I’m not singing away my life, Rani,” I protest. “We are just going to dinner, that’s all.”
“Fine, I’m coming too.” Rani crosses her arms.
“What do you mean you are coming too?” I ask. “It’s a date, Rani!”
“It’s a double date now. I’m going to get Alex, and we are coming with you.
I need an excuse to hang with him a bit more anyway, because I .
. . well, I really like him.” Rani shakes her head at me before I can protest. “No Ava, this is nonnegotiable. I am not letting you out of my sight with Terminator 2 until I am certain that you are certain you know what you want. I haven’t got you this far into adulthood to let you make out with a glorified vibrator now. ”
“Rani!” I don’t know what else to say. Mostly because now I’m wondering if he has a vibrate setting.